Not His Kiss to Take (10 page)

“
Almost never, actually. And that’s the thrill of it. I like being in command of someone else’s pleasure. I get off on it. I want them to be mine.”

The fullness was driving him crazy—wasn’t it enough yet? Talking to the evil mastermind of sexual deviation sort of helped to take his mind off everything. Yeah.
Sort of.
“You like…boys?”

“
Men
. I like men.” Evan began rubbing his back in concert with his belly. It kept him grounded, able to accept the relentless surge threatening to overwhelm him. “I just like them young. Pretty. Smooth.” Evan tickled him behind the ear. “Alive.”

“
As opposed to them dead ones?” he gasped as a vicious cramp bit his insides.

“
Bad one?”

Jamie couldn’t answer, could only pant and jerk his head.

Evan must have eased up with the water. The horrible pain relented. “I think—I think I gotta go…”

“
It just feels that way. Wait a sec and it’ll pass. You haven’t had quite enough water, considering how long you’ve been like this. Just a little more and then you’ll almost be there.”

The water flowed again.
Don’t think about it. Just ignore what’s going on down there and keep Evan talking. He might never talk to you like this again.
Plus concentrating on Evan’s explanations in that hypnotizing voice of his would take his mind off the fact he had to go—badly. “W-what did you mean,” Jamie panted, “by alive?” That had sounded creepy.
God—please don’t be
that
kinky.

Evan’s hand stroked lower down his belly, brushed against his dark blond bush and expertly unwound the tight knot of pain he’d been carrying around for what felt like forever. “Full of life. Eager to learn and eager to explore. Eager to please. Willing to jump in with both feet. Men my age tend to be…
jaded.
In their minds, there’s nothing new and exciting in life anymore, and they’re not interested in trying to change that. They just exist. Like drones. They go to work and date and make love with the same passion, which is to say, none. I don’t understand that, I guess. That’s not me. I see every day as a gift. Even now, after all the headaches. I want more. I don’t want to turn into one of those cold, hard people who’ve given up on life.”

Hmm.

Like Mom. She puts up with Derek because she thinks that’s all that’s left for her in life. She’s…jaded. That’s it, exactly, jaded. Alive on the outside, but dead inside.
For a second, Jamie knew he’d figured out something really important, taken a huge leap forward. Then the thought dissolved in a fireball of cramping pain. “Evan!” he gasped, unclenching his fingers from the towel to frantically grab at Evan’s pant leg.

“
I think that’s enough.”

“
I gotta—I gotta—”

“
You have to hold it.”

“
Hold it! I can’t!
Are you insane? Let me the fuck up!”

“
No.”

“
Let go! I’m gonna—”

“
No, you’re not. You’re gonna calm down and hold it in.”

Evan’s arm tightened around him.
If you don’t let go, you’re going to be cleaning up a big mess. And then I’m gonna kill you, you bastard.
“It hurts!” Felt like his skin was gonna burst like that overripe melon he’d knocked off the counter at work. “Please,” he begged. “Take it out!”

“
Just a few more minutes. You can do it.” Evan brushed his hair from his face. “You’re doing beautifully. So brave. You’ve always been so brave.”

Sweat popped out on his forehead.
I’m not brave…am I? I couldn’t even fight them off.
As he wiggled, the nozzle rubbed in strange places, catching his attention.
What the…?
Suddenly, all he could think about was his ass, his mind focused entirely on his breached passage and all the confusing sensations coming from inside, the bursting fullness, the slipperiness and…the strange, vaguely pleasurable ache. Against all understanding, Jamie’s cock twitched. Startled and horrified, he dug his fingers into Evan’s muscular thigh.

What’s happening to me…?

Squirming some more, seeking to get that alien thing in his ass to shift and move, he tried to figure out the source of that freaky sensation. The nozzle shifted and glanced over something inside, the jolt of sensation so powerful Jamie gasped.
There! What is that? Why does it feel…?

“
You okay?” Evan asked.

“
I-I think so,” he stuttered. “I f-feel…weird. Inside.”
Tingly, sore, full, achy and…alive.
“I’m gonna burst.”

“
Hold it in,” he coaxed. “Just one more minute. One. You can do it.”

“
I can’t—I can’t do it. I can’t stand it anymore! Too much, Evan. I feel funny. In my back, my ass…”

Evan released his constricting hold from around Jamie’s waist and stroked his hip and thigh with long, comforting caresses. “Feels full? Really sensitive?”

That was it—
sensitive
.
A live wire.
Consumed by the chaos of sensations, Jamie groaned. Evan slid his hand down the back of his thigh and pressed his fingers deep into the shadow between his legs. His brushed his fingers against the tubing and tapped the end of the nozzle. Inside, the nozzle surged forward, a little jab that sparked and zapped, igniting currents of electricity. For a second, Jamie’s brain short-circuited. “Evan!” he cried.
No more!
“I can’t—please! Help me.”

“
Okay, baby. I think you’re ready now.”

Jamie wanted to cry. At last! “Take it out,” he begged. “I gotta get it out, the water—”

“
Just as soon as we get you up and over to the toilet.”

Getting up, finding his feet, turned out to be hideously painful. Jamie’s legs wobbled. His bloated abdomen pulsed and throbbed. His ass clenched painfully, suddenly confused, wanting to open wide and dislodge that plug of plastic and all that water, while at the same time wanting to clench tighter, scared of what would happen when he did open up. Each step shifted the nozzle, the tip brushing against the walls of his rectum—there it was again, that strange, indefinable ache. A good ache.

A cramp chased the thought away.
Made it,
he sighed silently in triumph as he lurched into the cubicle.

“
As soon as I remove the nozzle, sit down and let it all out. It’ll come fast—try and hold it until you’re settled on the seat so you don’t fall and give yourself a skull fracture. That’ll be a definite trip to Emergency no matter what you say.”

For a horrified second, Jamie thought Evan would stand there beside him while he went.
No—he wouldn’t. He doesn’t mean to stay here with me, does he? Watching me?
“Y-you’re not going to—you’re not going to watch me are you? You’re gonna leave, aren’t you?”

“
No, angel. I won’t be leaving you alone. It’s not safe. You’re already shaking.”

“
Oh God,” he groaned. “P-please. Go.”

“
Ready now?” Evan guided him to the toilet. “Remember to sit down as soon as I remove the nozzle. Hold it just a few more seconds. You can do it. I know you can.”

He did. But it was a near thing.

As everything flooded out in a torrent, all that water, hurt and misery, he didn’t even have the presence of mind to feel embarrassed. His head spun. For peaceful seconds, he’d feel disassociated from his body, and then he’d get pulled back into the present, back into his hurting body by a violent wave of cramps. Pain and shivers racked his naked body, took turns trying to kill him. Then, finally, it was over. The tsunami rolled back out to sea. Exhausted, he slumped against the wall next to the toilet, Evan’s hand gentle on his shoulder and stroking up to his sweaty nape.

“
Okay now, Jamie?” he said softly in his ear. “Don’t worry, I’ve got you. I won’t let you fall.”

Am I okay?
His body, his hands—everything—shook.
Hollow. I feel…hollow.
Then, as he reoriented himself to the world, he realized he was finally, blessedly, pain free.
I feel like myself again…only better. I feel…wonderful.

Euphoric…? No, that ain’t it…this is better.

I’m flying!
His body felt weightless; so light he could float across the marble if he put his mind to it. Not that his mind was ready for anything more strenuous than thinking up ways to keep him upright. A wonderful and huge relief filled up the hollowness inside his head. Peace descended. He forgot how badly he wanted to hate Evan for forcing this humiliation on him.
I forgive you, Doc. Even for liking what you just did to me.

With Evan’s help, he made it safely to his feet. Swaying slightly, he drifted into the man’s warm, solid embrace.
I’m safe.

“
Come have a shower, angel. Let’s get you cleaned up and warmed up. Your skin’s like ice.”

Clean.
Jamie sighed.
It felt so fantastic before. And my feet are really cold. Evan probably stole back his socks.
Finding that idea absurdly funny for no explicable reason whatsoever, Jamie laughed into Evan’s broad shoulder. Laughing made him feel like he was floating even higher. God, he could practically reach the stars! Evan’s cotton shirt felt so soft against his cheek and smelled like chocolate and…
man
. Turning his head, he inhaled deeply.

Evan smells really nice.

Huh.

And he feels even better.

Chapter Six

The way Jamie clung to him delighted Evan to the core. Unfortunately, it also made his dick hard as rock, and the simple task of getting Jamie into the shower turned into a new and exotic form of water torture. Jamie kept brushing naked body parts, mostly his thigh, over the thick bulge in Evan’s pants. Not on purpose. Still. Rather hard on frayed nerves.

The torture continued as Jamie pressed closer into his side and buried his face in the hollow of Evan’s throat. The tip of his nose was cold and his breath crazy hot.
What the…? Is he sniffing me?
Probably—hopefully—he didn’t smell all that bad. Just sweat and cocoa. And the musky scent of aroused male.

Knock it off! You’re supposed to be helping him, not getting off on this.
Sure. Like flicking the switch on desire was even possible. Jamie was the most beautiful creature he’d ever had the honor of getting his hands on. Plus, his mind associated giving enemas with pleasure and submission, and giving one to Jamie…a deadly combination.
But he’s not gay. And he’s not yours.

And he’d never submit anyways.

Life could be such a cruel bitch.

After switching the shower to the rainfall setting, Evan guided Jamie under the spray and soaked himself to the skin in the process. Even if he was of mind to let go of his shaky patient, he couldn’t. Jamie had a stranglehold on his shirt, practically dragging it off his shoulder and choking him as it pulled taut against his throat. Despite his slighter stature, Jamie wasn’t a weak man, even when unwell. Every muscle in his lean frame rippled with strength and suppleness, especially his arms and shoulders, toned by what must be demanding physical work.