Not His Kiss to Take (9 page)

Eighty? Ugh. Bony fingers?
“Guess you’re just gonna have to get off using lotsa spit and your right hand. I’m keeping my cute ass all to myself. I’ll pick out my games later. Too bad you don’t like girly bits. They’re gonna be falling out
everywhere
.”

They parted in an uneasy truce, both smug in the knowledge of their respective impending victories. Only Evan looked extra smug. Not a favorable sign. He knew something and wasn’t saying; curse him, the dirty rotten cheater. As the evening turned to night, and the cramps started in earnest, it dawned on Jamie that Evan knew something because…because he was a
fucking doctor
. Not just an arrogant prick. A doctor.

After spending an hour curled in pain and sweating buckets, Jamie accepted defeat. No Playstation. No zombies. No scaring homo-doc with naked girl boobs. It wasn’t fucking fair.
I guess it’s an enema—whatever that really is—and a meeting with the bony-fingered dick doctor for you, Jamie-boy
. All things considered, he’d kill for this enema thingy—anything to make the pain go away.
I shoulda stayed in Bremerton and let Derek smack me around. At least I had friends there. And none of them even know what the fuck quinoa is.

But he didn’t crawl as Evan predicted. Hurt too much. Rather, he knocked over the lamp again, trying to get comfortable, which never happened for even one damned second. Evan heard—he always heard—and waited in the doorway, widened his stance, crossed his arms, and looked smug.

“
I hate you,” Jamie groaned.

Not looking as smugly victorious as he could, Evan didn’t say anything. Instead, he crooked his finger.
Come here, boy.
Jamie heard it plain as day. Giving up, he rolled off the bed in humiliated defeat. He couldn’t figure out which was worse, losing the bet in the first place or knowing Evan was gonna get off on sticking something up his butt, the perv-o. What happened after the up-the-butt part, though?

The incredible marble bathroom used to be his favorite place after the kitchen. He remembered that warm bath Evan had given him that first night, how that might have been the thing that saved him.
Clean…

Now that same room seemed kind of scary.

“
Strip,” Evan commanded.

Okay, he was already enjoying this, the jerk. “Why do I have ta be naked?” That made no sense. Yeah, he could see ditching the pants, but it was fucking
cold
in there.

“
Do it.”

T-shirt. Jammie bottoms. Socks. Jamie missed his socks; actually, they were Evan’s socks, but so what, he missed them.

As Jamie shivered in his naked wretchedness thinking unkind thoughts, Evan alternated between organizing equipment and leering at him. Yeah, he was enjoying this.
Bet his dick is hard.
Jamie couldn’t really bring himself to care. He wanted to die.

Apparently, torture by enema involved a lot of shit—he laughed mirthlessly at his own pun—and a comfy-looking foam pad for lying on that Evan covered with a towel warm from the heated rack. Tubes, a bag he filled with water and crap—Vaseline. Jamie almost bolted. The cramps, though—couldn’t.

Pointing to the makeshift bed between the walk-in shower big enough for six Evan-sized guys and the toilet cubicle, Evan said, “Make yourself comfortable.”

“
Do we really have to do this?”

“
You need this, so yes.”

“
I’m cold,” Jamie complained bitterly. “And you cheated.”

Because the huge bathroom occupied its own time zone, it also had its own heating systems, and Evan turned them all on. Then he waited. Jamie slunk over to the padded bed and lay down, glaring at Evan as he hung the bag from a hook on the wall behind him. Yeah, he’d done this many times before. But to who? If Jamie lived through this, he was gonna ask about this mysterious, kinky, and oh-so-very-dirty boyfriend.

“
Face the other way, Jamie.”

Oh right.
He only wants my ass.
With a grimace, he rolled. Ashamed and feeling strangely vulnerable, Jamie buried his head in the crook of his arm and breathed shallowly, waiting for the burn of whatever it was Evan planned to shove up his backside. Could a person actually die of humiliation? And how much would this hurt?

“…
like that, pretty boy? Yeah, you like big things up your ass, don’tcha…”

Jamie squeezed his eyes shut tighter. Fabric brushed his naked back as Evan knelt behind him. Curling his fingers into the thick cotton of the towel, Jamie waited for the horror to begin, his whole body trembling with anticipation.

Evan’s big, warm hand touched his shoulder, and he shivered anew. “Relax, Jamie, I won’t hurt you. I’d never hurt you.”

I believe you—I do.
But it didn’t stop his trembling any. Evan’s confident hand sliding across his chilled flesh, though? Instant calm. Evan rubbed his back until Jamie started to melt.

“
Relax,” he coaxed. “Nice, even breaths in and out.” Evan had such a wonderful voice. Went well with those wonderful, expressive eyes. Too bad he was mean as a rattlesnake. “This isn’t going to hurt, but you might find it uncomfortable at times. You’ll probably cramp up a little.”

Jamie snorted.
I’m cramping now, asswipe.

Evan ran his hand down his back and pressed hard into muscle as he went, digging his knuckles into the curve of his spine above his buttocks. Felt heavenly. Doc had powerful hands. Then the caressing, kneading hand roved lower. Jamie tensed.

“
You’re not relaxing, Jamie.”

“
Gee, wonder why.”

“
Man up, angel.”

“
You’re a prick.” How could he say that? Shades of Derek.

The warm hand gave his ass a little pat. “I’m gonna lube you up now. Just like before.”

Rubber snapped, and a moment later, Evan’s hand, the ungloved one, landed on his buttock again and spread him open. Jamie shuddered. It wouldn’t be that bad—Evan had done this to him several times already with the antibiotic stuff, yet this time felt different. Scarier. Like he’d been stripped bare.
Is this what trust is? Nothing left to hide behind?

“
Pull your knees toward your chest a little.” Jamie did—and it relieved some of the cramps nailing him in the gut. “Stick your butt out toward me.”

“
God,” he groaned. “You’re such a perverted bugger.”

A chuckle. “True. A little closer. Yeah—like that. Perfect.” Evan caressed him again, the entire length of his back, then down over his butt cheek and along his thigh. Shockingly, blissfully warm. “Deep breath in now, angel.”

“
I ain’t your angel, you know,” Jamie snarled. And took that deep breath. The petroleum jelly didn’t feel nearly as cold as lube. Evan was generous with the squicky stuff too. The sensation of having his hole petted was quite disconcerting. Before he could sort that out, Evan pushed his gloved finger in. Knowing now what to expect, Jamie barely winced and didn’t jerk away. The long digit slipped in deeper, twisted around, coated him thickly, and then withdrew. “Did you like that?” Jamie snapped, going for sarcasm.

Behind him, Evan sucked in a breath. “Hell yeah,” he replied.

“
Sick bastard.”

“
Nope. I just like your pretty pink hole.” Evan patted his ass again—then pinched it. “I’m gonna insert the nozzle now. It’s a little longer than my finger, but you’ll hardly feel it.”

“
Is that so?”

Evidently, Evan didn’t understand sarcasm. He just carried on.

“
Then I’m gonna release the clamp, and the warm water will start to flow in. It’ll feel weird to you at first; then as you fill up, you’ll start to feel the pressure more and more. If you start to cramp up badly, tell me, and I’ll turn off the flow for a moment so you can adjust to it.”

Unable to control the wave of dread rolling over him, Jamie shuddered. Then he shook, chilled though the room was now quite warm. His stomach ached. Evan patted his back and ran his palm up and down his ribs, along his goose-prickled flank.
Please hurry! I don’t know if I can take this much longer. Why did I take those pills? Why? Or eat so many of those stupid cookies?

“
Another deep breath in, beautiful.”

Jamie breathed. The nozzle prodded his hole. He clenched.

“
Relax, Jamie. Come on. Don’t fight it.” The nozzle got replaced by Evan’s finger slowly circling his defiant hole. Once he unclenched, Evan inserted his finger again, breathing hot and heavy across his back, enjoying violating his ass.

“
Evan—”

“
Hush.” His finger popped out, and before Jamie had a chance to sigh with relief, or tense up again, something harder, colder, and plastic slid inside him. The finger felt much better. Less alien.

He endured it for a few seconds but couldn’t get used to it. “This is awful! Evan, I can’t—take it out!” But it was too late. The water had already invaded his breached fortress, foreign and unwanted. He groaned—mostly in abject misery. Evan’s chest rested against his back, providing a cloak of blessed warmth as he leaned over him and began caressing his distended abdomen, round and round, circling counterclockwise, moving in a hypnotic rhythm. The hand felt nice; everything else below that hand—not. “How could anyone like this?” he asked, confused and resentful. “It’s awful. And fucking embarrassing.”

“
It’s all about control. The giving and taking of it.”

Control?
“I don’t get it.” Jamie wanted to keep Evan talking, anything to take his mind off the weird and confusing sensations: the thing he knew was in his ass but wasn’t bugging him exactly; the water—the idea of the water going up there—the cramps and worse, that peculiar fullness increasingly getting…fuller.
Horrible.

“
Some people get enemas solely for the physical sensations—there’s a kind of euphoria you get from it that’s like nothing else you’ll ever experience. You’ll feel it afterward, that peaceful emptiness. At least I hope you will. Lots of people like it. So much so that some even get addicted to it.” Round and round went the soothing fingers. “And sometimes people just like being clean. Inside.”

“
Ugh! Do
not
tell me more.”

Evan laughed softly. “Not just for anal sex—and you say I have a dirty mind—although there is that aspect, yeah. It can also make you more sensitive, more receptive to pleasure. And some people respond to having an enema forced on them, as punishment, or just as part of a power play between a dominant and his submissive. There are people with a powerful desire, the need to obey—to hold until told. It can be a powerful exchange.”

The fullness, the achy pressure, increased as Evan told him tales of nasty things. The water stretched him inside and…and…. Jamie shuddered again. He couldn’t describe how it felt—fucking peculiar.
When’s it going to be over? How much water can possibly fit inside?
Surely there was enough up there by now? “Evan—”

“
Not yet.”

Trying to ease his sore guts, he wriggled. Evan usually did know best, the prick…but this? Trying to ignore his body and its painful protests, he focused on what Evan had said, worked away at the puzzle of a concept he simply didn’t get. It wasn’t like he hadn’t heard of this stuff. Hadn’t wondered. “What part do you like?”

“
What do you mean?” Evan sounded a little breathless. Because, kinky shit he was, he liked this.

“
What’s your kink?”
What isn’t your kink?

The hand on his belly kept stroking in silence. Maybe Evan didn’t plan on answering? But then he did. “I guess I just like…being in charge. Calling the shots.” He chuckled. “Having my way.”

“
Don’t you always?”