On Her Master's Secret Service (14 page)

“Well at least the men won’t come in now.” Avery shook her head as the kitchen door swung behind him.

Eve had to ignore everything except what Grace had said. “What are you trying to tell me?”

“I’m going to ask you this and if you want to tell me to keep my nose out of your business, then I will, but we’re family now and I happen to care a great deal about you. You’re more than willing to help me out any time I’m in trouble. Can’t you understand that I want to do the same for you?”

“Me, too,” Serena said, reaching for her hand. She stopped as though realizing she was about to do something rude.

God, when had she made the conscious decision to shove everyone away? Maybe that decision hadn’t been conscious. Maybe it had been born from her pain and misery, but she’d done it all the same. She was surrounded by these amazing women and they were right. They were family. She grabbed Serena’s hand. “I’m worried about Alex.”

Grace sank back into her sofa, a long sigh coming from her chest. “Thank god. I hate doing the tough-chick thing.”

Avery smiled. “I advised that we should just get you drunk and have a sleepover. I always talked too much at sleepovers.”

Serena snorted a little. “Yeah, that would totally work. Avery and I would be snoring by nine and Grace would be up all night with
Carys
. Nope. This is better. So talk and tell us how we can help because I hate Amanda.”

“Is she the one who’s always so sweet around the Doms and then tells all the subs in the locker room that they’re fat?” Avery asked. “Yeah, I hate her, too. I told her I wasn’t fat, I was pregnant and she said ‘same difference. If it moos like a cow…’”

Grace gasped. “She called you a cow?”

Avery nodded. “Apparently she was very interested in Li before we got married. He admitted to sleeping with her a couple of times, but then he slept with most of them. Why did I get the
manwhore
?”

“Reformed
manwhore
,” Eve said, getting a little angry at the thought of Amanda trying to undermine everyone around her. “Now she’s after Alex.”

“Well, I think Ian would be her first choice, but he sees right through that kind of crap,” Grace said.

“Alex is softer than Ian. He wants to believe the best of people, so when Amanda pulls her doe-eyed routine, he buys it. Come on. It’s an age-old tale. Men are dumb. Like eighteen seasons of
The Bachelor
haven’t proven that,” Serena said. “They always pick the nasty one and then they’re all like, ‘What? I didn’t see that coming.’ Dumb ass.”

Amanda was awful. She got that. It didn’t explain everything. “Why would he take her? He needs backup. He pretends like this isn’t dangerous, but this guy he’s going after…”

“Is one of the worst terrorists in the world and has hurt all of us very deeply,” Grace finished.

Eve shook her head. “I don’t understand. You know Evans?”

“I know that he hurt you and that means he hurt every one of us, and we all have to pitch in.”

A deep well of emotion surged. There were things she knew intellectually, but hadn’t put into practice, holding the truths close to her heart. One of those truths was the fact that she didn’t have to be alone. She didn’t have to hide or cover up. If she were on the outside looking in on her own case, she would tell herself that talking about it, opening up and sharing the burden where she could was the only way to heal. “Can I be honest?”

“Of course,” all three said at the same time.

Eve couldn’t help but laugh. “I don’t want him to go.”

“I wouldn’t either,” Serena said. “It’s scary to send them off.”

Eve shook her head. “It’s not totally about the danger. Alex is making the same mistakes all over again. He’s opening wounds that might finally be healing.”

“I don’t think they’re healing for him, sweetie.” Grace looked out to the patio where the men had gathered. “They’re tough men. They like to pretend they don’t feel things, but it’s an act.”

“I think I understand,” Serena said. “You want him to focus on you, on your relationship.”

Finally someone got it. “Serena, after it happened…”
God, be brave, Eve. Just fucking say it.
“After I was raped…”

“After you were tortured,” Grace prompted. It was obvious to Eve that Grace was taking the big-sister role, and she wasn’t about to let Eve sugarcoat a damn thing. She should be annoyed, but she only felt a deep sense of gratitude.

“After I was tortured, Alex shut down. He said all the right things, but he wasn’t there for me. I’m not saying he didn’t sit with me and hold my hand.”

“He pulled away,” Avery concluded. “Yes, I do understand that, but not the way you would think. I understand where Alex is coming from.”

Eve sighed. “Of course, I know that it’s a typical reaction for the loved ones of a victim to pull away due to an overwhelming sense of guilt and a fear that the world won’t be the same again. I’ve seen it in a lot of people.”

Avery wouldn’t let up. “But you haven’t felt it, Eve. I know you’re smart and you’re so educated and experienced when it comes to people’s motivations, but you can’t know what it feels like to be the one who didn’t die.”

But Avery did. “I didn’t die, Avery. It wasn’t as bad as that.”

“No, she’s right,” Serena argued. “A rape is something traumatic. The only thing I can think of that’s worse than it happening to me is knowing that it’s happening to someone I love and not being able to stop it.”

“He was helpless, Eve.” Avery’s eyes closed and opened again as though she was briefly reliving what she’d had to go through. “I was helpless. I was trapped in that car and I listened to my daughter die. I watched my husband bleed to death. Alex didn’t have to watch, but I can imagine that it was horrible for him. He had to sit there knowing that you were hurting. Can you imagine the scenarios that played through his head? Have you told him what happened? Have you really talked about it?”

“I didn’t want to burden him.” She’d talked to her therapist but only in general terms. She’d told the police, but that was a clinical thing, divorced utterly from the emotions she’d felt. “It should have brought us together. I thought we were strong enough that it would bring us together, but he drifted away from me.”

“And you’re so angry about that,” Grace said. “I would be. I would feel abandoned.”

“He didn’t want me anymore. I wonder if he thinks I’m dirty, Grace.” She’d never said it out loud. “He wouldn’t touch me for the longest time and then it was different. I hated how different it was, like I wasn’t the woman he’d married anymore but he was too honorable to leave. So I divorced him, but we fell into this stupid contract and we haven’t been able to move on. Just when I thought I could, Michael Evans pops back up.”

“He was always going to come back.” Serena sat back, her face thoughtful. “That’s what Jake and Adam said.”

“I don’t think so. I know Alex has it in his head that Michael Evans is out there plotting against him, but I disagree. Evans was satisfied with the revenge he had against Alex.”

“But Alex isn’t satisfied that the threat is gone.” Grace took a sip of her wine. “He can’t be until Evans is in jail or dead. Eve, you think this is about revenge, but I think you’re wrong. You’re too close to the situation. You both made mistakes, but the first one is not talking about this. I know it’s hard, but you’ve both tried to find ways around the situation. You didn’t divorce Alex because you’re not in love with him.”

Eve let her eyes close, unwilling to look at them while she admitted her sins. “No. I did it because I needed him to notice me again.” A hand slipped over hers. She looked down. Grace. The words seemed to come more easily now. “I wanted him to fight me, but he didn’t. He told me if that was what I needed, then he understood.”

“Dumbass,” Serena said under her breath.

They’d both been stupid. “But I don’t know that I’m willing to jump back into this with him. I think we might have made too many mistakes. It might be best to just let each other go and start over again.”

“You can’t until you sort some things out,” Avery argued. “And I don’t know how you do that from here when he’s in Florida.”

“I’ve tried to make him stay.” It was the first time she’d asked for anything in years, but she had to acknowledge that it might be too late.

“Oh.” A little gasp came out of Serena’s mouth. “Oh. Now I don’t hate that idea at all.”

Grace leaned forward. “She just got a plot idea. When she says she doesn’t hate something, it’s usually really good.”

Serena got very animated as she talked about her writing, her hands fluttering as she spoke. “Look, sometimes when you’re writing, a good plot is right in front of you, but it’s in these weird little pieces. So, Alex needs backup, but he’s afraid to take Eve. We all hate Amanda, and let’s face facts, I don’t care that she’s a cop, she’s a ho-bag and she’ll throw him under a bus if some
hottie
comes walking by. Our men are involved in this potentially dangerous operation and wouldn’t we feel safer if there was a sister on the inside? There’s one solution to this problem. You have to kill Amanda and take her place.”

“I’m not killing Amanda.” But the rest of the idea had a tantalizing efficiency to it. She should be the one watching over Alex. He’d said no when she’d run the idea by him initially, but did that mean she had to obey him? He wasn’t thinking. She was the only one who could really do this. She had the training to handle it. She knew Michael Evans better than anyone did. She’d practically written the book on the bastard.

Serena leaned forward, a beseeching look on her face. “Oh, I wish you would. I caught her trying to get Jake to help her with suspension play. She shook her thong right in his face and then I overheard her talking about how sad it was that he was saddled with someone like me. Of course, I then wrote her into my next book and brutally murdered her there, but this would be like research for me. We would all help you bury the body.”

Eve felt a smile slide across her face as she looked at the women around her. They would. They would be right there with shovels and flashlights and alibis, and a nice bottle of wine for afterward because they were a sisterhood. They might not share blood, but they shared a life.

“No bloody death, Serena, but she’s definitely not going to Florida. I already asked Alex if I could come and he said no, but he’s wrong about this. I need to make sure I’m the one he introduces as his sub. Did Adam do her cover?”

“Oh, yes. He booked the tickets and everything, but none of this works unless we spring it on Alex when he can’t back out,” Serena mused. “We need Sean in on it, too. He knows where the meet site is.”

Grace gave the room a peaceful smile. “I think Sean is going to have to leave a little later than planned because
Carys
has some sort of emergency. Just a couple of hours. Long enough that he has to meet Alex at the club and take Alex’s sub with him. Yes, I think that can be arranged. Sean can’t stand Amanda, and he’s got the very same fears the rest of us have. She won’t watch his back. She’ll be too busy trying to get into his pants. He’ll hop on board.”

“I need to change my hair color.” Her heart thumped in her chest, adrenaline starting to flow. Was she really going to do this? Alex was going to be pissed, but she couldn’t let him go without proper backup. And in a club, she might be more effective than he was about gathering information. Women gossiped. A lot. He had to have a sub the other women would trust or it wouldn’t work.

“Makeover! Oh, this is going to be fun.” Avery clapped her hands. “I think you would look gorgeous with a nice walnut shade. It would totally contrast with your skin.”

“Is it safe to come in yet?” Adam poked his head out of the kitchen. “Because the hors d’oeuvres are getting cold. Sean is going to be pissed if I serve them cold, but you ladies looked like you were talking about men, and not in a happy, fun way. I refuse to be the dude who gets his balls kicked in because he was stupid enough to walk in at the wrong time.”

Poor Adam. Stuck with the ladies. “Yes, I think your balls are safe. And besides, I need a favor from you. We’ve been plotting, you see.”

Adam was in the living room in a flash, a wicked grin on his face. “Oh, I love a good plot. Count me in.”

She took one of the canapés off the platter. She actually had an appetite for once.

One way or another, she was going to make sure her husband came back from Florida in one piece. And then they could finally have closure.

Alex glanced down at his watch and silently cursed.

“They’re going to be here, right?” Kristen cast a nervous glance toward the stairs and the door at the top where apparently the great Chazz
Breyer
was going to eventually make an appearance.

It was the door to the office he would eventually have to get into. Alone.

“Sean texted me. His flight landed an hour ago. They should be here any minute.”

“I don’t like last minute changes in plans,” Kristen grumbled. She was dressed casually in jeans and a V-neck T-shirt that showed off a nice rack. Her strawberry blonde hair was in waves across her shoulders, but he couldn’t get the sight of Eve spread out on her desk out of his head. He’d thought of nothing else for the last twenty-four hours. He’d tried to call her, but she wouldn’t answer her cell. He’d skipped the dinner party where he’d been sure to see her because he’d wanted to get packed and ready, and now he wondered if that had been a mistake.

He shouldn’t have left things that way between them, but she hadn’t given him a choice.

“So, what do you think of the place, Anthony?” She dropped his fake name casually. For now he was Anthony Priest, known to most as Master A.

He had to pull it together because they weren’t alone. Several young women were currently milling about either cleaning tables or restocking the bar. As far as he could tell, the club was a repurposed industrial warehouse. Sanctum was the same, but Cuffs had maintained much more of its former identity than Sanctum. The floors were concrete and the walls, for the most part, were still metal and girders. There was a bar area and what appeared to be a roped off VIP-type area. The VIP area looked like someone had ordered a bunch of BDSM equipment off the Internet and tried to approximate a play space, but nothing was set up properly. He hoped no one actually tried to play here. “It looks like crap.”