On The Rocks (29 page)

“Only option. If Galletti’s checking people
at the door, he’ll expect you to be carrying. I show up armed he
might not take too kindly to it and we don’t want to do anything to
rouse his suspicion. But that ring’s gonna do for us in two minutes
what’ll take seven or eight if I have to do it manually. Everything
goes right, I’ll be in and out before he even notices I’m
gone.”

“What if everything goes wrong?”

Leave it to Phil to think shit through.
Xander chuckled. “Then you come in guns blazing and save my ass.
Earn your keep around here for a change.”

He tossed the Glock back onto the seat
beside his buddy.

“Know what I can’t figure out?”

“What’s that?”

Phil tipped his head toward the galley. “Why
she wants this so bad.”

Xander had mulled over the same question.
But when it came right down to it, the answer was obvious. “She’s
scared shitless.”

“All the more reason for her not to go
in.”

“Not of the job. Job’s what she knows. It’s
who she’s been her whole life. This being a mom thing? With
her
background?

“The only way Naima’s ever defined herself
is about to be taken away. If it were either one of us we’d
probably fight like hell to keep the tiniest scrap of that, same as
her.”

Same as someone else he knew. Kizzie had
been an agent a long time, but submission was a new world with
rules she didn’t understand because they hadn’t had a chance to
discuss them. No wonder she’d gone back to Connolly. Her return was
more than just a matter of debt to her bastard handler. It was a
matter of identity.

Kizzie had said she owed Bill everything
Xander thought she was.

Forget who
he
thought Kizzie was. Who
did
she
think she was? Better still, who did she want to
be?

Xander’s head fell back on the couch. One
more day and he’d be able to focus wholly on his sub. They could
figure this thing out between them together. Figure out what each
of them wanted. And while that happened, he’d get the time to
explore every supple inch of her, the lushness of her mouth and the
warmth of her body. See if she could truly submit. And where things
would go once she did.

“What’s up?” Phil said, breaking into his
thoughts before those thoughts turned physical.

Xander twisted his head. Cocked a brow.

“You got that stupid look on your face. Not
to be confused with your usual stupid look. Or your angry stupid
look. Or your ‘I’m about to do something stupid’ stupid look.”

Xander flipped Phil off and yawned. “After
this job, we should take a break.”

“Oh, that’s the Kizzie stupid look. I’ll add
it to the repertoire.” Phil dropped the magazine out of another
pistol and got busy breaking it down. “I’m gonna say this ‘cause
you need to hear it.”

“Which probably means I
don’t
need to
hear it, you just want to say it.”

Phil stopped what he was doing and looked
Xander in the eyes. “I didn’t like Martina, rest her soul, but even
before—” he motioned toward Xander’s shoulder. “I didn’t like her.
Not for you.”

“I know.” Phil had never outright said it
while Xander and Martina were a couple, but Phil’s silences were a
language all their own.

“I like Kizzie. For you.”

Xander blinked.

“So flip her already and stop letting that
woman walk away from you.”

Xander blinked again. Unless it directly
affected the job, Dr. Phil over here usually kept his opinions on
Xander’s affairs to himself. Nice to know his brother gave him the
stamp of approval. And now that
his
entire love life had
been sorted…

“You gonna stop walking away from Zlata?”
Xander asked.

Phil dropped his head over his work, the
silence punctuated by the steady swoosh of the scrub brush over
metal.

“She’s a kid,” he finally said, voice a
little too gruff. “Just a kid I’m watching over ‘cause I clearly
don’t have enough on my plate keeping your ass from doing stupid
shit to get killed. But that’s it, X.”

“A shovel,” Xander called dramatically. “My
kingdom for a shovel.”

Phil flashed an evil look and scrubbed
harder at what had to be a microscopic grain of dirt that simply
would not budge.

“You’re gonna start a fire over there,
Marchande. What happened in Bruges?”

“Last time— She’s a kid, X. Doing kid
things. She’s going to school and hanging out with her friends. I
was just making sure she was gettin’ on okay. But I’m done with it
now. She’s fine. I’m not goin’ back.”

“Ah. She’s got some punk she’s dating. Want
me to kill him?”

A V dug so hard into Phil’s brow it looked
like a W. “You really are an asshat, you know that, right?”

Xander shrugged. He’d been called worse.
“But I’m not wrong.”

He left it alone after that, let his eyes
slip closed as he listened to the rhythmic swoosh of the brush.

“What about Lennox?”

His lids popped open.

Phil sighted down the pistol and dry fired.
“If you’re taking a break after this, I’m happy to go handle
that.”

“Not a chance.”

Xander had spent far too many nights
thinking of the perfect way to make Tate suffer. After Martina, his
anger took him to the edge of madness. Consumed by bloodlust he’d
followed every lead —no matter how implausible or improbable— to
find Lennox Tate. Ran himself into the ground. Had to walk away
from the Lifestyle that used to be an outlet, too much of a danger
to himself and anyone he’d thought to play with.

Aside from Phil and a handful of others, no
one else knew what Lennox Tate had cost him. No, Tate’s life would
end by Xander’s hand alone.

“And if I just so happen to run into him you
think I’m gonna let him walk?” Phil asked.

“Break his legs if you want. But you let it
ride,” Xander said.

Or else things would go left between him and
his brother.

Phil grunted.

“No bullshit, Phil. You kill him and I’d
have to kill you. I have to do it, I have to make sure he’s dead.
Because Lennox Tate will never take anyone I love from me
again.”

LIPS STILL LOCKED together, Lennox
backpedaled to the couch and Kizzie went with him, shuffling over
the cool tiles. Her heart pounded wildly from the dancing. Her head
was fuzzy from all the spins.

And her horny-o-meter was through the
roof.

Lennox was exactly as she remembered. Firm
lips, slow tongue, faintest hint of chocolate smoke. The beard was
new and scratchy in a good way, the trim hairs leaving a delicious
tingling on her mouth. She imagined that tingle lower on her body
and moaned.

He held her a little tighter. She shoved her
fingers through his hair, tilting her head to get more of him, and
he obliged, meeting her with soft, gentle licks.

He was holding back, being sweet.

She didn’t want him to hold back. She didn’t
want him to be sweet with her.

She wanted him rough, wanted him to fuck
this tickle from her belly, beat the ache from between her legs
until they were both wet and sticky and spent.

Lennox sank down onto the cushions and she
straddled him, nuzzling his cock right up against her core. Her
hips turned, grinding hard and slow until his answered the call.
Her hands snuck under his shirt, palms skating up his ripped abs to
his pecs. Pet that big cat until she had the man growling into her
mouth, muttering curses against her lips.

Better.

Oh, god, so much better.

Kizzie moaned again, feeling him everywhere:
hands on her back, tongue in her mouth, solid chest pressed to
hers, hard cock between her legs.

But she didn’t
feel
him.

—Stop thinking.

Finally, he shifted gears and took over.
Lennox leaned back and yanked her shirt up and over her head in one
fast pull. Then his lips were on hers again and she was kissing him
back, completely aware that this was just a paint by numbers sort
of thing. A Tab A to Slot B sort of thing.

He kissed down her jaw. Her neck. Licked
over her collarbone, heat trailing the path carved by his
tongue.

It had always been like this between them.
Steamy and intense but on the physical plane alone. Lennox was sexy
to his bones, but a grand infatuation that was just about the sex.
Capable of fucking her brains out but not getting into her
head.

—Stop thinking.

Mouth on the swell of her breast, he tugged
the ponytail from her hair and her dark tresses fell around her
shoulders. His hand dragged down her neck, fingertips down her
spine, into her jeans. He cupped her ass and fused her body to his
with one rough pull.

God, yes.

His mouth came back to hers, tongue
plunging, hips rolling, sending her on a wild ride of sensation and
lust. Physical attraction alone led to some pretty rockin’ orgasms,
even if the emotional connection had never been there.

Not with him.

Definitely
not with the guy before
him.

—For fuck’s sake,
stop thinking
!

And not with any guy since.

Until Xander.

Lennox slid a hand into the hair at her
nape.

A chill sprinted down her spine and Kizzie
tore away fast. What the hell was she doing?

“Oh fuck,” she whispered.

That “something” clawed in her chest and she
beat it back.

Not now. She couldn’t handle that now. Not
when she was this raw and achy.

“What’s wrong?” Lennox asked. His eyes
flitted over her face; that grip stayed firmly put on her butt.

“Ohfuckohfuckohfuck. Shit.” Kizzie hid her
face in her hands. Her feet dangled off the couch, wiggling
maniacally from side to side. Breathing jagged, she dug her fingers
into her eye sockets. “I’m seeing someone… I think.”

Lennox cocked his head. “You think.”

“It’s complicated.”

“It’s complicated…”

“Stop repeating everything I say,
Lennox.”

“Hey, I’m just trying to make sense of it.”
He leaned back against the cushions. Shifted his hips up, cock
nudging her clit and sending a bloom of heat through her belly so
fast she almost couldn’t swallow the moan. “Sounds like you’re
trying to figure it out, too.”

Wasn’t
that
the truth.

She had no idea where things were with
Xander. She was his sub, yes, but what did that
mean
?
Couldn’t be a couple ‘cause he already had the Mrs. position filled
on his dance card. Not that she was looking for that, but
still…

Did being his sub mean she could see other
people? And how did the “you only come for me and only when I let
you” bit, the “you may
not
touch Sir’s pussy” bit, work if
she
was involved with someone else?

Lennox kept his low-lidded gaze on her, his
hands warm and solid against the small of her back. She wanted him.
Bad.

But for all the wrong reasons.

“Yeah,” she nodded. “I’m seeing
someone.”

“He’s an asshole.”

She grunted a laugh. “You don’t even know
him.”

“He’d be a bigger asshole if I did. Does he
know what you do? Come on, we all know agents aren’t good for
relationships with civvies.”

“You’re about to be a civvie, Lennox.”

“Yeah, but I’m different. I’m special.” He
pushed her hair off her shoulder, glided his thumb gently against
the curve. “And you’re special to me, Kizzie.”

She squeezed her lids shut tight. He had to
stop touching her or she’d give in to him.

“What is he, like a tax accountant or
something?” Lennox asked.

“Exactly that. Wire-rimmed glasses. Pocket
protector. High-water pants. Just a really ordinary guy.” The smile
on his face mirrored hers.

She leaned forward and pressed her mouth to
his in a chaste kiss. As she climbed from his lap, his hand came to
her side and she paused.

“I’m here when you’re ready to come back to
me, Kizzie,” he whispered.

She snagged her shirt and pulled it over her
head inside out and backward. That “something” didn’t want to be
ignored, clawing and clawing at the inside of her chest. She needed
air, a place to think.

Door… Door… Who moved the door…

She twisted her head, looking around like
she was in a fifty thousand square foot mansion and not a
two-bedroom cottage.

“Hey,” Lennox called as her hand hit the
knob. She angled back to him, fighting the urge to
go
back
to him. “You really think you’re gonna hate me forever?”

God, the pain in his voice. She wanted to
soothe it away for him, even though he had earned every bit of
it.

Without answering, Kizzie slipped out the
back door and into the night.

“Fuck.” She sucked down a shaky breath, but
the crisp air burning her nose and lungs did nothing to clear her
head. In bare feet, jeans, and a tank, she walked into the dark,
hoping to put some distance between herself and… herself.

A huge part of her was team Xander— fully on
board with this whole submission thing even though she didn’t know
the rules. Didn’t know when she’d see him again. Didn’t even know
how she felt about a guy she
didn’t even know
.

But, for reasons she’d never tell him,
another part of her had love for Lennox, too. Always would.

Lennox was easy. No rules. No… challenge.
Nothing to hide from. She’d learned not to depend on him so he
could never let her down again. With Xander, she’d got it in her
head that he’d be there for her, even though years of training and
experience proved she could only depend on herself. Xander pushed
her out of her comfort zone. Forced her to be vulnerable. To be
what she didn’t know she could be. Didn’t know she wanted to
be.

Xander had the power to do some real damage,
and she hadn’t even slept with the guy! He was the bigger gamble.
Was he worth the risk?