“
But there's more to it than that," she'd said.
"My marrying Howard means you don't have to be the man in the family anymore. You won't have as
much responsibility. I want that for you."
At the time he'd felt as if he were being eased
out of his own family. Now, looking back, he won
dered if his mother had worried about him the same
way Stephanie worried about Brett.
Footsteps on the walkway interrupted his mus
ings. Both he and Stephanie stood.
“Anybody home?" a man called.
“
Hey, Nash, did your landlady kick you out al
ready?"
He didn't recognize the first voice, but he knew
the second.
“
Kevin," he said and headed toward the front
porch. Nash assumed the other man was one of the Haynes brothers.
When he stepped outside he saw he'd been right.
Kevin and Travis stood by the sidewalk. They
waved at him and walked closer.
Kevin smiled at Stephanie. "I knew you'd get
tired of his ugly face. Threw him out, huh?"
She laughed. "Actually he's helping me patch
and paint my gatehouse. He does quality work and
if he's at it much longer, I'm going to have to give
him a discount on his room."
Kevin shook his head. "Nash getting his hands
dirty? I can't believe it."
Nash stepped next to his brother and threw a
mock punch. Kevin ducked, shot out a jab, then
slapped him on the back. "Wait until you hear what Travis has to say."
Travis Haynes wore a khaki-colored uniform and a beige Stetson. He pulled off the hat and smoothed
back his hair.
“
Kevin and I were talking," he said. "I happened
to mention that once a year the Glenwood sheriff’s
department along with local firefighters and para
medics get together with the army base about fifty
miles from here. We break up into teams and spend
a couple of days playing war games. The more ex
perienced men are paired up with new recruits, giv
ing them a chance to learn. What with your back
ground and all, I thought you might be interested."
Nash could see Stephanie out of the corner of his
eyes. She stood on Travis's right. At the mention of
war games, she rolled her eyes.
“
Gage already said yes," Kevin said. "I did, too.
If Quinn shows up in time, I know he'll be in.”
“
I'm in," Nash said.
Kevin nudged Travis. "Told you he'd say yes."
Nash turned to Stephanie. "What about you?"
She shook her head. "I have an actual life that
requires me not to play games. Why is it men refuse
to stop acting like little boys?" She looked stern,
but her tone was teasing.
“
Everybody has to play sometime," Nash said. Her gaze locked with his. He felt the sexual ten
sion return and wished they were alone.
“
I like a different kind of game," she informed
him, then turned her attention to Kevin and Travis.
"Gentlemen, I need to get back to my painting. I
hope your war games are everything you want them
to be."
Travis grinned. "You sound just like my wife.
She makes fun of me every year."
Stephanie waved and headed back into the gate
house. Nash watched her go, his gaze drifting from
her trim waist to the sway of her hips. Heat flared
inside him. He knew he had it bad and he didn't
give a damn. Wanting Stephanie was the most fun
he'd had in years.
“
The war games start in a couple of weeks,"
Kevin said. "You're going to have to extend your
vacation.
Nash thought of all the time off he'd accumulated
in the past couple of years. "Not a problem.”
“Good."
“
We need to—" Travis's cell phone rang, cutting
him off. "Just a sec," he said as he pulled out the
phone and pushed the Talk button. "Haynes." He
walked a couple of steps away as he listened.
Kevin stepped closer and lowered his voice. "So
what's with you and Stephanie?" Nash wasn't surprised his brother had noticed his
interest. He and Kevin might not be identical twins,
but they were still closer than most brothers and
didn't have a lot of trouble knowing what the other
was thinking.
Nash looked at the gatehouse. "Nothing signifi
cant."
“That's not how it looked from here."
“
She's great, but I'm not into permanent rela
tionships. As it turns out, neither is she."
“
You can't be alone forever," Kevin said.
"Why not?"
“
It's better to be with the right person."
Nash shook his head. "You say that now that
you've found Haley, but six months ago you thought alone was a fine way to be."
“
You loved Tina enough to want to marry her.
What happened that was so bad you wouldn't want
to risk trying again?"
“
Nothing was bad." Nothing specific. He
couldn’t point to any one event and say "this is the
reason I don't want to get involved." Probably be
cause his problem wasn't about his marriage. It was about him.
“
You're stubborn, Kevin said.
“We have that in common."
“
I know. Mom used to complain about it all the
time." He took a deep breath. "Speaking of which, I want to invite her and Howard out here for a few
days. To meet everyone. I know you're not going to
like it, but you're going to have to deal with it. You can't—"
Nash cut him off with a simple, "Fine with me."
Kevin stared at him. "You're serious?"
“
Sure. Give them the name of Stephanie's B&B.
They can stay here."
Nash thought of his recent revelations about the
past. Maybe things hadn't been exactly as he'd re
membered them. Maybe being twelve had colored
his view of the truth. Maybe it was time to change
things.
“
Great. I'll call tonight." Kevin grinned.
"They're going to like Stephanie."
“
Don't go there," Nash growled. "You start
making trouble for me and I'll tell Haley about the
time Mom walked in on you with those two cheer
leaders. If I remember correctly the three of you
were naked."
Kevin winced. "I was only sixteen," he pro
tested. "I didn't know what I was doing."
“
You seemed to know exactly what you were do
ing. As for being sixteen, that doesn't help your
cause. The cheerleaders were both in college."
Kevin grumbled under his breath, then nodded his
agreement. "I won't make trouble with Stephanie,"
he promised.
Nash believed him. Kevin had never wasted his
time with lies.
He knew Kevin thought he was doing Nash a favor by wanting things to work out with Stephanie.
What Kevin didn't know was Nash wrestled with
more than a bad marriage. His brother knew how
Tina had died, but not the details. She'd been killed
in the line of duty. What Kevin didn't know was
that she'd been assigned as backup on one of Nash's negotiations.
His superiors had never blamed him, but Nash
knew what had really happened that day. He'd been
responsible for the death of his wife as surely as if
he'd detonated the bomb himself.
Chapter Ten
Nash put his arm around Stephanie and drew her
close. She leaned her head against his shoulder and sighed. The soft puff of air teased his neck and made him think of other ways they could be touching. The blood heating in his body told him to get her upstairs right that second, but he resisted the desire growing inside him. They had the whole night to make love. Right now he was enjoying being next to her.
The night was clear and cool. Overhead, stars glit
tered in the sky. He could hear the faint sound of a
stereo next door. The boys were in bed, but probably
not asleep yet, which was another reason to wait
before heading inside.
“
What are you thinking?" Stephanie asked from
her seat next to him on the top step of the porch.
"That you're so incredibly hot for my body that
you're tempted to rip off my clothes right here? And
if that's not what you're thinking, you need to lie."
Nash smiled. "I was also thinking about your
kids, that it would be better to wait until the little
guys are asleep, then head inside."
“Good point. As long as you were thinking about it."
He turned his head and brushed his lips against
her forehead. "I'm having trouble thinking about
anything else."
“
An excellent quality in a man." She wrapped
her arms around his waist. "Dinner was fun. Thanks
for joining us."
“
I had a good time, too. The twins look so much
alike, yet their personalities are different enough that
I don't have any trouble telling them apart."
“I know. I don't understand how they can be so
physically identical and so unalike on the inside.
I've always wondered if some personality gene
didn't split exactly in half or something." He grinned. "That would be your technical, biochemical explanation?"
“Do you have a better one?"
“No. Yours is perfect."
She laughed. "I'm a fairly intellectual person,
which explains why I beat your fanny when we were playing Go Fish."
“You are a card shark."
She winced. "Bad pun, but I forgive you. The
whole evening was fun. Sometimes I get so caught
up with the boys' homework schedules and their ac
tivities that I forget to take time for us to just hang
out and enjoy each other's company. Life becomes
a treadmill and the routine becomes all-important.
Occasionally I need a reminder that it's okay to have
a good time. Thanks for doing that tonight."
“
My pleasure." He dropped his hand to her hip and rubbed the curve there. "You said something
earlier that I can't stop thinking about."
“What?" She raised her head and looked at him.
“
You wanted to know why men refused to stop
acting like little boys. The implication being we
don't grow up. I know you were teasing when you
said it, but I wonder if that's what you really be
lieve."
She pulled back slightly, shifting so she faced
him. One of her hands rested on his knee, the other
toyed with the sleeve hem of his shirt. In the porch
light, he could see her large eyes and the way the corners of her mouth twisted slightly.
“
You're the first man I've ever spent any time
with who seems to be a grown-up," she said. "My
father was completely irresponsible and I've told
you about the horror of being married to Marty. I've
been burned twice and that makes me less than trusting."
“
Is that the real reason you haven't been dating?”
“
Yikes! Talk about going for the throat.”
“
Is it?"
“Maybe. Probably. I don't know."
“
Come on." He put his hand over hers and
squeezed. "You do know." Her gaze narrowed. "You have that masters in
psychology, don't you? Now you want to try out
some of your theories on me."