Authors: Beverley Hollowed
She could feel Cole
’s hand on her back as he scooped up her hair and held it back from her face. She thought her heart was going to burst with sadness. His touch was so familiar but right in that moment he felt like a complete stranger.
Was the man she loved really c
apable of doing something so unthinkable?
“Ally,” he said as she slid away from the toilet
and him. She rested her back against the cold tiles around the bath and tried to calm herself down. She buried her face in her hands and tried to make sense of the many thoughts spinning around her head. “Talk to me. Don’t shut me out.”
“You have got to be kidding me,” Ally s
napped, whipping her head up to look Cole straight in the eye. “That is rich coming from someone who arranged to have a man killed because of me but somehow, didn’t think it was important enough to mention it to me.”
“Ally, I hadn’t planned on this happening like this,” Cole said moving clos
er to her once again but she pulled away further.
“I wanted to kill him with my own bare hands,” Cole said, dropping his eyes down to his hand, unable to look Ally in the eye any more. “I just wanted him gone. But Nathan insisted. He said you needed me here and so did the children and he was right. But I never wanted Nathan to get hurt. That was the last thing I wanted. He is like a brother to me.”
“Then why do this at all,” Ally asked trying hard to understand. “Why be something you are not.”
“Because all this is my fault,” Cole replied finally looking Ally in the eye. “I should have never let you down that night
. I should have made you go to the police the next day. And I should have never beat him up because now you are afraid to go to the police because you are protecting me. See, this is all my fault.”
“Cole what happened between him and me
is not your fault,” Ally said surprised he would blame himself for what Jason had done. “And what he is doing now isn’t your fault either.”
“
Maybe if I had finished the job,” Cole sighed as he pinched his nose to relieve the sudden headache he had. He knew it was just stress and tension. “I should have killed him that day in his apartment. And I would have too if Nathan hadn’t stopped me. Then you would be okay now. You would have nothing to be stressing about. And Nathan wouldn’t have gotten shot.”
“But I wouldn’t have had you
either,” Ally cried leaning up and taking hold of Cole face in her hands. “Don’t you get it? Cole I love you. Damn it, I need you, we all need you, me, Ben and Little Bean. What would have happened to us if you were rotting away in a prison cell somewhere?”
“Ally
, sometimes I can barely breathe with the fear he will take you from me,” Cole admitted honestly. “I am afraid I will drop my guard and he will get in. And I will lose you.”
“But we can’t keep living like this,” Ally said sadly. “I know he scared me in the shop last week, but I think you are worrying for nothing. He will get bored and
just move on.”
Cole dropped his eyes
once again, unable to look Ally in the face. Ally instantly felt her heart race rapidly in her chest. She knew there was something Cole hadn’t told her yet and if she was honest, she wasn’t sure she could take any more bad news.
She took a deep steadying breath before she asked the question she was sure
she really wanted the answer to.
“What are you not telling me?” S
he asked staring at Cole intently. Cole stared at the floor for a few minutes and Ally knew he was struggling with what to tell her and how to word it. So she waited patiently.
H
e took a deep cleansing breath before he finally allowed his eyes to meet hers and the look in them nearly broke Ally’s heart. She could feel the tears pool in her eyes and quickly trickle down her face.
“What I am going to tell you,” Cole began nervously. “I know it’s going to upset you. But I want you to try remain calm for both yours and the baby’s sake.
And I want you to remember I will die before I let him hurt you again.”
“Cole you are scaring me,” Ally sobbed softly and she quickly brushed the tears from her face with the back of her hands. “Please just tell me.”
“When Nathan was at Jason’s,” Cole continued with his story. “Jason told him that…”
Cole stopped to take another deep breath, this was proving a lot harder to say out loud to Ally than he thought it was going to be
.
“Jason told him that he knew the baby was his, “Cole said quickly then stopped and took another deep breath. “He said he would not be kept away from his child. That if he could
not have you and the baby. No one could.”
“OH GOD!” She cri
ed out as once again she was on her knees in front of the toilet and she violently threw up once more.
“It’s okay,” Cole soothed her as he softly rubbed her back. “I promise Ally, he will
get nowhere near you or Little Bean. I will do everything in my power to keep you safe. I promise.
Ally turned and buried her face into Cole’s chest and sobbed harder. Cole wrapped her tighter in his arms and held h
er closer to him.
They remained on the floor for some time, until Ally cried herself into
complete exhaustion and she fell asleep with her head resting on Coles lap.
Cole eased her head from his legs and down onto the floor so he could get up onto his feet. Once he did, he bent down
, scooped Ally up from the floor, carried her out into the bedroom and sat her down easily in to her spot on their bed.
He quickly stripped and slid into the bed next to Ally pulling her closer to him. She instinctively snuggled into his chest and settled back
into a deep sleep.
Cole lay there for the longest time as thoughts ran
through his head. He thought back to the day he went to Jason’s apartment. He could see him lying there on the floor as Cole kicked and punched him again and again, he just lay there and took it.
That worried Cole. Thinking back
now, Jason would have let Cole beat him to death. This meant to Cole, he had no real concern about his own life. And that someone who behaved in such a way, appeared to have nothing to live for and so was not afraid to die. That made him so much more dangerous. It made him fearless and so much more of a threat.
Cole finally drifted off to sleep around three am but it was a restless on
e filled with bad dreams.
Again he was searching for Ally and he could hear her call
ing out for him again and again. Then he was back in front of the big black door once more, banging and banging on it hard but unable to get through it.
Suddenly he heard a loud bang and he shot up in the bed.
When he reached out for Ally, his heart raced even faster when he found her side of the bed empty. He was out of the bed in one swift movement.
First
, he headed into the bathroom but she was not in there and the fear in the pit of his stomach quickly grew as he headed back out through the bedroom. He walked along the landing, where he headed straight to Ben’s room.
When he opened the bedroom door
, a mixture of both relief and heart break washed over him. He found Ally asleep against Ben’s crib with her hand in through the bars holding his tiny little hand. It was a beautiful yet sad thing to see, as Cole knew she was scared for Ben now as much as herself. That her over-riding need as a mother to protect her baby was very evident.
Cole walked in to the room quietly and scooped Ally up off the floor but she jumped the moment he touched her.
“It’s just me.” He whispered as he pulled her closer to him. “Let’s get you back to bed.”
He carried her back to the bed and climbed in beside her
, holding her close to him.
“Cole,” she whispered as they lay there in the darkness of their room. “Promise me something.”
“Anything for you, my gorgeous girl,” he replied as he kissed her on the forehead.
“If something should happen to me…” she began but Cole interrupted straight away.
“Don’t talk like that,” Cole said in an almost angry tone. “Nothing is going to happen to you Ally. You can’t think that way.”
“I know, but please,
I need to say this,” she cried, leaning up in the bed and staring down at Cole. “Just listen to me.”
“I’m sorry,” he replied. “Go ahead.”
“If anything should happen to me,” she repeated. “Promise me you will make sure Ben knows how much I love him. That from the day we brought him home he was my baby.”
“Ally…” Cole began to protest.
“Promise me,” Ally demanded quickly.
“I promise,” Cole said with a defeated sigh. “I promise Ben will always know how much his
mom loved him and just how hard you fought for him. He will know how great you are and how there will never be someone else in this world that could mean as much to me and him as you do.”
“Thank you,” she replied in barely a whisper.
“But nothing is going to happen to you,” Cole added. “That is my promise to you. You and I are going to grow old together. We are going to watch Ben and Little Bean grow in to amazing people and then we will watch our grandkids come into the world. You are going nowhere.”
“Thank you, Cole,” Ally said leaning up and kissing him tenderly on the lips.
The moment her lips touched his, Cole wanted her. He pulled her to him and rolled her over in the bed.
They slowly made love before they fell asleep in each other’s arms. Finally
, feeling happy and contented, at least for a short while.
Over the next few weeks, Ally barely left the house. And when she did, it was usually only ever as far as Nan and Pop’s or for her check-ups at the hospital. She seemed to have withdrawn into herself a little and nothing seemed to reach her.
Everyone was worried about her. Cole had pleaded with her to go to London for a while just to get a break from everything but she refused to go.
Cole was at a loss for what to do. The fact that Jason was nowhere to be found didn’t help either. They had his apartment watched but he never came back. Nathan called in a favour from one of his friends still on the force and they had his credit card traced but it wasn’t being used. It was like he just vanished off the face of the earth.
When they w
ent for the twenty six week check-up, Ally had a 3-D scan of the baby. It was the first time Cole had seen her properly smile in weeks. They held hands and watched their baby girl move on the screen in the clearest picture they could have even imagined.
“I think
Little Bean is going to be a heartbreaker, just like her mom,” Cole said with a big proud grin. Ally smiled up at him and suddenly the old Ally was back. She was even more beautiful when she smiled. Cole wished he could keep that smile on her face but decided he would just enjoy it while it lasted.
After the hospital, they headed, as always
, straight to Nan and Pop’s, where they had left Ben and Adam.
Adam was the new guy Cole had hired as extra security. Ally had become so upset one day while
at a hospital visit that Jason could get into Nan and Pop’s and harm Ben, Cole hired Adam to remain with Ben while he was away from them.
When
they reached Nan’s, they played the DVD of the 3-D scan for Nan and Pop.
“I have never seen the like of it before,” Pop exclaimed in amazement
. “Sure you can see her little face and all. And for the record, she’s as beautiful as her mother.”
“Thank you Pop,” Ally said with a genuine smile. “I just wish she was here. I can’t wait to hold her in my arms.”
“You need to have some patience, chicken,” Nan said as she stood up and headed for the door. “When the apple is ripe, it will fall not before. Now, who wants some tea?”
“I’ll help you,” Cole said getting up and following Nan out to the kitchen.
“So, how is she really?” Nan asked once they were alone.
“Not so good,” Cole sighed as he reached up into the cupboard and took the cups down as Nan boiled the kettle. It had become a custom that Cole helped Nan with the tea and they would always have a little chat while they prepared everything. “She is exhausted because she isn’t sleeping properly. Her weight is a
little down on what it should be and her doctors aren’t happy about that. They are also worried her blood pressure is still a bit raised. But the main thing they are worried about is the baby as she is lying very low and her head is already in position. Now, they said that this isn’t uncommon and that she could move back out anytime.”
“And if it doesn’t
happen?” Nan asked, concern evident in her voice. “What does that mean?”
“They are a little concerned that Ally could go into early la
bour,” Cole sighed. “They said she needs to rest and try not to do anything too stressful, that could raise the blood pressure and, well it’s all a little worrying to be honest.”
“She is only twenty-
six weeks,” Nan sighed. “It’s far too soon for the baby to get here. The longer she stays in there the better she will be. Ally needs to really learn to relax. Mind you, I am sure this Jason thing isn’t helping.”