Open Your Eyes (28 page)

Chapter Fifty-eight

The sudden change from a hot and humid summer to icy cold weather hit me harder t
his time. The frenzied pace that was New York was relentless as ever. The crowds still jostled one another on the sidewalks, yellow taxis blowing their horns non-stop.

Nothing had changed. On the surface at least.
Except that I had come alone this time. I even stayed at the same hotel. And I was on a very specific mission. Yet a lot had happened since I was last here. Now it was me who was different. I was the one who had changed.

If only I wasn’t so fearful of going to see Nick. If only panic didn’t rise in my mouth like bile and make me want to run away.

I dressed carefully. I had brought the red dress Nick had nearly torn from my body. It was still a great dress, even though I had to wrap it tighter around my now thinner frame. I had been to Frederique earlier and forked out another ridiculous sum of money to have my hair done in the latest fashion of the day. Frederique had woven a few red streaks into my dark hair, making it glow and look alive.

“Absolutely gorgeous
, darling.” He beamed as he admired his handiwork in the mirror. I had to agree, it was worth every cent to help boost my confidence.

I shrugged into my coat and opened the umbrella as the doorman let me out into the cold
, crisp winter afternoon. Snow had just started falling lightly and I smiled as I had a flashback to Olivia’s reaction the first time she experienced snowflakes. She had stood in the middle of the sidewalk, her arms stretched out wide, sticking her tongue out to taste the fresh flakes.

Tightening my
scarf as a gust of wind ripped at the umbrella, I was glad that MoMA was only a few blocks away and I would be safe from the elements again shortly.

I eagerly paid the $25 entrance fee, smiling wryly as I remembered my reluctance to fork it out the last time I was here. What I didn’t expect though, was the squeeze of my heart when I
recognized Nick’s face on the presentation billboard, smiling back at me. If this was a recent photograph he hadn’t changed much since I last saw him – except maybe for small dark circles under his eyes and melancholy tugging at his mouth. Or maybe it was just all my imagination.

Oh dear
God, I hope I'm not making the biggest mistake of my life. Please don’t let me make a complete fool of myself
. My prayers were shooting up fast and furiously, I only hoped someone was listening.

I made my way up the stairs into the cavernous room where I had first met Nick. It felt even larger and colder than before. I
trembled as I walked toward a bench, feeling my jelly-like knees wobble uncontrollably. I sat down, gripping the edges of the seat so tightly my knuckles turned white.

Breath
e, Natalie, breathe.

Glancing around the room
, I noticed that a few people were ambling around lazily. But it was when I looked up at the enormous canvas directly in front of me that all the air in my lungs escaped with one fell whoosh. Staring back at me were my own eyes!

My hands flew to my mouth as I
recognized the photograph –
it was of us
; I was dancing in Nick’s arms, a soft happy glow on my face. The satiny fabric covering my skin left very little to the imagination, accentuating every curve of my body that pressed closely to Nick’s. But the gasp that left me when I looked at the image of Nick’s face was clearly audible in the silence of the enormous room, echoing back to my ears. The look of sheer adoration in his eyes as he smiled down at me simply took my breath away.

“Penny for your thoughts?” a deep baritone voice that I
would recognize anywhere asked softly behind me.

My heart nearly leapt out of my throat, my hands trembl
ed uncontrollably. I turned my head. My eyes collided with amused green ones, framed by dark thick lashes barely concealing a twinkle.

Nick!

He completely unhinged me. All the breath from my lungs squeezed out, my head suddenly dizzy, my senses reeling. I could not look him in the eyes, the heat simmering in them was so intense that I quickly dropped my gaze to his sensuous lips instead, which curled up at the sides into a heart-stopping smile.

Nick cocked his head
toward the enormous artwork hanging directly in front of me. The exact same spot his previous ‘showstopper’ had been. The one that started our first conversation.

“Care to share your thoughts on the picture?”
His voice was husky, drifting toward me on a cloud as he took a step closer and sat down beside me. I could feel the heat radiating from his body, aware of every inch of him so close to me.

“
Very sensual, isn’t it?” These were all the exact same questions he had asked me the first time we met, right here. I remembered as if it was yesterday.

My voice faltered.
“Y-yes.”

“What is it about the picture you like most?” he asked, his voice shaky, his eyes burning into mine. After what felt like an eternity, I tore my
gaze away and gaped at the picture.

It was beautiful beyond imagination.

“What do
you
like most?” I played along, at a loss for words, my throat tight and strained, burning with unspoken words.

“The way they hold each other. There is a very special connection between them, a connection that transcends time and distance.”

I nodded, staring at the picture. I was only too aware of that special connection, every fiber in my being yearning to experience it again.

“So what brings you to New York City this time of year?” Despite the playful tone in his voice, I sensed the anxiety in his loaded question.

“Snow… And…” I bit into my lip so hard that I could almost taste the blood. A warm flush spread over my neck and cheeks as I hesitated. This was so much harder than I imagined.

“Ah, so there is something else? Besides the snow?”
He moved closer to me on the bench, so close that his breath puffed softly onto my cheek.

I closed my eyes. Being so close to Nick yet not touching him was beyond intense.
His familiar scent that still haunted my dreams filled my nostrils. My hands lay limp in my lap; I was unable to move, paralyzed by fear.

Silence. Nick was waiting for my answer.

Extreme vulnerability splayed open my soul. What if this was all wrong? What if Miranda had misunderstood? What if Nick didn’t want me? My hopeful heart would shatter into a thousand pieces…

“
Open your eyes
, Natalie,” he whispered, his breath warm on my ear.

Desperate to do as he asked, I will
ed my eyes to open. But they remained shut. Tightly. Shutting everything out but the erratic beating of my heart… and the sound of Nick’s rhythmic breathing and an all-encompassing awareness of his presence.

Yet the instant his hands touched mine, my eyes flew open. He held both of my hands in his, rubbing lightly over my skin with his thumbs, as if to warm me, to bring me back to life. For I was sure that in that moment I had died and gone to heaven. This must be a dream, a very surreal dream.
How could it not be?

I focussed on the moment. It was all that mattered now.

Nick. Me.
Us
.

Here. Now. Together.

“I see you, Natalie. I see you,” Nick murmured as his lips brushed mine, so lightly that it barely touched.

“I came for
you
.”

“I know
, my love,” he groaned as his lips parted mine and he pulled me tightly to his chest.

Chapter Fifty-nine

Nick

I woke up with her head nestled on my chest, my arm tightly holding her to me as her breasts curved into my side, her leg splayed possessively over mine. I reached down and stroked her cheek, unable to stop myself from touching her.

The simple need to touch her overwhelmed me. I could not control myself when she was near.

Natalie had me tied up in knots. I physically ached for her, every cell in my body screaming to stamp my possession on her forever. I knew that after last night, I could never let her go again.

I had to remind myself that this was real. That she was here in my arms again, in my apartment in New York. I
cherished just being near her.

So this
is what happiness feels like.

She
was all I ever wanted and needed. Peace settled in my heart, the kind of peace a person only feels when they are completely content with life. I was completely captivated by everything that was Natalie. Her smile, her very being, lit up my world.

The
months of separation dropped off between us as if it had never happened. Except that this time our lovemaking was even more intense than I remembered it being before. This time we both knew without any doubt that this was where we belonged. Where we wanted to be for the rest of our lives.

Finally the universe aligned, perfectly synchronised, bringing us together again.

We’ve been given a second chance.

This time I want it all.

With Natalie.

I exhaled slowly as I tried to hold back the feelings of intense love and tenderness that enflamed my heart. And cock. A smile played on my lips as I lusted for her all over… again. A feeling that only she could evoke in me. I had
n’t ever felt like this with anyone else.

As long as I lived,
I was never going to get enough of making love to Natalie. Just looking at her had primal lust spike my bloodstream – I couldn’t ignore it, even if it meant waking her from her sweet slumber. She was tired from our all night lovemaking, yet my want for her wouldn’t be denied.

God
,
how I wanted her!

Her eyes fluttered open as I had willed them to. She looked up at me, her pupils flaring when she read the desire in mine. My heart stopped beating for one perfect moment as our souls met.

“I love you,” she mouthed softly, her voice thick with sleep. I felt my heart would burst with joy. Her words shook me to the core. Those were the words I craved to hear, music to my ears.

Her pulse beat erratically at her neck as I leaned down to kiss her soft lips, pulling her lower lip into my mouth, tasting her.

With the back of my hand, I traced an invisible path from her chest to her navel and back up again until I cupped a glorious breast in one hand, kneading softly as her nipple hardened against my palm. I remembered every dip and hollow of her skin, eager to explore them again.

My mouth s
ought out the raspberry pink nipple of her other breast as she arched her back to offer herself up to me impatiently. With one leg I pushed her legs open wider and sank my aching cock into her. She gasped as she took me into her all at once, balls deep, already wet and ready for me.

“Harder, Nick, harder,” she moaned as I drove my cock into her
, squeezing her perfect ass. Her hips instinctively rocked up toward me, our rhythm perfectly in sync.

I rolled us over till she was on top of me, our fingers interlocked as she leaned over me and kissed me hard, her nipples scraping my chest.
She sat up and rode my grateful cock, slowly pushing all the way up so I could see the exact spot where we connected as she slowly lowered herself back onto me. Not only was it delightfully visual, I could feel every tight inch of her as she moved up and down my shaft. My pulse leapt erratically – my balls ready to explode.

Grabbing her hips
, I helped her move faster and faster, riding my cock harder now as her breasts swayed joyfully above me. The sight of her fucking me with such abandon completely undid me. This was a Natalie I had not seen before; gone was her shyness and reserve, replaced by confidence and self-assurance that turned me on beyond my wildest imagination. Because I knew that finally Natalie understood how wanted and loved she was, secure in the knowledge that she could let go of all her fears that had always held her back.

Her eyes bore
d into mine, wide and inky, her pupils dilated with her impending orgasm. Her lips parted, glistening as she licked them unconsciously. A fine sheen of perspiration covered her entire body. My God, Natalie had never looked more breathtaking. Acutely aware of every movement, every breath, I could not look away even if I tried to.

She leaned back and cupped my balls in her hand and squeezed them as she continued her onslaught on my cock.

“Nick, baby. Yes!” she moaned loudly as my finger found her sweet spot, rubbing in small circles, enticing her release.

Suddenly her body spasmed with pleasure, shuddering uncontrollably. It was her sweetest surrender, yet her most powerful moment. She had both given and taken all that she could. And I was the lucky man to witness and experience it all.

She fell forward, pushing her
breasts into my face before she shoved her ass backwards, slamming into my balls. Finally I lost all control and pumped into her, giving her every drop I had to offer.

She was mine and I was hers.

Forever.

We both knew it could be no other way.

She leaned forward onto my chest, pressing herself into me, skin to skin, her breathing ragged. I gently brought her down from her explosive orgasm with soft kisses on her damp skin.

It was time to talk now.
I had to tell her everything I had held inside for so long. We had to speak the words and set the past free in order to move forward. I pulled the blanket over us, cradling her in my arms as I rained soft kisses on her hair.

For a while we just lay there, catching our breath,
relishing the nearness of one another, listening to the fire crackle and the sounds of early morning as the city came alive.

I let out a deep breath. Finally the words and feelings found their way out. “What nearly killed me was imagining you with him. Images in my head of Gabriel making love to
you, pleasuring you, making you moan as you reached orgasm after orgasm. It drove me insane. Wishing it was
me
you were with.”

I felt her stiffen in my arms, but I pressed on. She had to know.

“Some nights I would nearly lose all self-control and call you, just to hear your voice. The memory of how you sound started to fade over time and it nearly drove me mad. The more I tried to cling to it, the more it slipped away, evading me. I listened to your voicemail just to hear your voice. Pathetic, huh?”

She let out a small sigh against my neck and gently pressed a kiss into my shoulder.

“Then there were the times I thought I spotted you in a crowd. I’d run after the woman only to be devastated when she turned around and it wasn’t you.
God, it's all so lame, isn’t it?”

Her breath hitched. “No, it's not pathetic or lame. I’m so blessed to be loved like that. You don’t know what hearing you say this does to me. Over the years I was certain you had forgotten me. It would be so easy for you to go back to your glamorous life, surrounded by beautiful people. I knew women would throw themselves at you, you’d never have a lack of willing company.”

She looked up at me, gazing unwaveringly into my eyes. “It nearly killed me to imagine you making love to anyone but me. Imagining you with other women tortured my mind. I’d made the choice to give you up, so I just had to suck it up.”

Her words made me smile, strangely happy in the knowledge that it had been as hard for her as it was for me. “I tried to go out with other women. Often, halfway through dinner I’d think of something you’d said or there would be something that reminded me of you. I’d find myself making excuses to leave.”

Her eyes widened questioningly, a small smile threatening to curve her lips.

I could not control my grin as I squeezed her butt in my hand. “The last time I was with a woman I got slapped hard. I was screwing her – and I called out
your
name when I climaxed – she looked so much like you...”

Now my tone was serious again
. “I was always waiting for you. I thought I could choose who I loved, but found very quickly that was not the way it works. My heart has chosen you. Nobody else would do.”

Natalie
sucked in a long breath, then let it out again slowly. Her eyes were soft and dewy, tears welling up inside the rims. “I often dreamed about you, Nick. You would be making love to me. Then I’d wake up, wet with want and longing, tears on my cheeks, my pillow soaked. I’d feel so guilty. I dreaded it because I was sure I called out your name, even in my dreams. I never wanted Gabriel to hear that. It would kill him.”

It was my turn to draw a sharp breath. Her words completely
undid me.

Natalie placed her arm
s around my neck, pulling my head closer till we were gazing openly into one another’s eyes. Her voice was soft and filled with love. “You melted the part of my heart I had kept frozen for so long.
You opened my eyes
.”