Authors: Kira Saito
He sneezed multiple times. “Lies. All
lies. Dinner it is then?” He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards
a clearing located in the middle of the graveyard.
I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath.
Lucus, where art thou? Please be okay. The world needs more people
like you… I need you…
Chapter Three
Delusions and
Illusions
Ghede Nibo placed his rum
bottle on th
e ground and clapped his hands in a dramatic fashion, which
prompted the tombs around us to shake, rattle and topple over.
Hordes of gorgeous young men and women climbed out of the graves.
There must have been hundreds of them.
What an ethereal and haunting sight the
women were, with their matching black silk dresses embroidered with
purple lace and delicate clusters of pearls. Their shiny
waist-length hair glistened under the moonlight, and their swanlike
necks moved elegantly against the wine-colored sky. They moved with
such effortless grace that it seemed as if they were gliding above
the muddy earth rather than walking on it.
Each woman was accompanied by an equally
stunning man. The men held their heads up high and proudly showed
off their black velvet riding coats, crisp purple shirts and
elegant top hats as they guided the women to a long table that had
been laid out in the middle of the graveyard.
I looked down at myself and realized that
I was dressed exactly as they were. The fine silk fabric felt
wonderfully soft and breezy against my skin, providing a welcome
relief from the oppressive summer heat. My feet were no longer
bare, but were clad in delicate silver slippers encrusted with fine
rubies and tiny diamonds. What the hell was going on?
“
What’s going on?” I turned to
Ghede Nibo for an explanation. “You said you’d help me. Who are
these people? Why am I dressed like they are?”
He responded to my neurotic questions with
a big smile and took my hand into his. “Let’s eat,” he said, as he
led me towards the table.
The men and women gathered around the
table while low flames from thick purple candles further
illuminated their otherworldly beauty. I was struck by the fact
that most of them were around my age. “Are these the ones who died
young and unexpectedly?” I whispered.
He nodded. “Sit. Sit.” He pulled back a
chair for me. Reluctantly, I sat down and scanned the table for
Lucus. Where was he? He should have been there. Despite my forced
optimism and resolve to remain positive, there was a strange
sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that told me I had lost
him forever, but I wasn’t ready to accept that fact.
Ghede Nibo clapped his hands and a feast
consisting of spicy stewed black goat, roasted black rooster, fried
coconuts, fried plantains, smoked herrings, and spicy white rum
manifested itself onto the table. It wasn’t exactly my dream dinner
menu, but if memory served me correctly they were his favorite
foods, and who was I to argue with Brother Death over
food?
“
Eat. Eat.” Ghede Nibo shoved a
steaming bowl of stewed goat and a glass of spicy rum in front of
me.
I eyed it warily, unable to bring myself
to taste it.
“
If you want my help
you’ll be polite,” Ghede Nibo said, as he sat down beside
me.
I glanced around the table and saw all the
beautiful faces watching me in grotesque expectation and outright
curiosity. I didn’t really have a choice, did I? I dug into the
stew, all the while holding my breath. Without hesitation I stuffed
the stew down my throat and then turned to Ghede Nibo. “Delicious.
Now can you help me?”
The guests started to laugh at my
question. I scowled at them and they averted their eyes and started
to whisper amongst themselves. What was their problem?
Ghede Nibo sneezed. “No you have to
try the fried plantains.”
“
Fine.” I muttered through
clenched teeth, as I took a plantain from a dish.
After I finished the plantain Ghede Nibo
shoved a plateful of smoked herring in front of me.
On and on the night went. Every time I
would finish a dish Ghede Nibo would insist that I had to eat
another, then another and another. I felt my stomach rapidly
expanding and my body getting sluggish and heavy. Around me, the
faces blurred, their laughter becoming almost deafening as they
watched me eat dish after dish and drink glass after glass of
rum.
The low beat of drums started to play in
the background and the beautiful dinner guests rose from the table
and linked arms. An unwelcome fog descended upon us and the guests
started to move in a fierce and unrestrained manner. The drum beats
got louder and louder and the dancers began to move faster and
faster. Their faces glistened under the moonlight; any sadness they
had carried had been eradicated and replaced with rapture and
incomparable joy. Soon they were moving so fast that they were no
more than swirls of purple and black. My head became heavy and a
thick veil of confusion took hold of me. It all seemed so familiar,
yet so very foreign. The dancing. The drums… The drums… They were
trying to tell me something.
The drumbeat resonated with some deep part
of me that I had willingly buried. I got up and the circle openly
welcomed me into its fold. My body and soul became one with theirs
as I joined their intoxicating dance. Round and round we spun,
stomping our feet and gyrating our hips to the sound of the drums.
I was fearless, carefree, and for the first time in a long time
allowed myself to laugh without restraint.
“
Marvelous! Simply
marvelous!”
Ghede Nibo cried out in childish delight, as he watched me
dance.
“
Please,” I begged, suddenly
snapping out of the trance and remembering Lucus. I removed myself
from the group and made my way back to Ghede Nibo. “Please will you
help me now?”
“
You want to know more
about the one who died unexpectedly? Don’t you?” he asked, as he
leaned in towards me and tilted my head up from its low position.
“They’re the key, aren’t they?”
“
Yes.
” I instantly perked up at his words
and forced myself to get a grip.
“
Look at the dancers. Look at
them carefully. Do you see the one who died young and
unexpectedly?”
I shook my head in confusion as I
studied the group of dancers. I was pretty sure Lucus wasn’t in the
group.
“
No. I don’t see him,” I said
with certainty and conviction. “Please, I want him back. I love
him. He didn’t deserve to die.” I mentally scolded myself for
sounding like a sappy love-struck Voodoo Queen.
“
Him?” Ghede Nibo laughed
loudly as he clapped his hands.
I crossed my arms and openly scowled
at him.
Noting my severe expression, he stopped
laughing and his pretty hazel eyes looked at me with sincerity and
pity. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”
I nodded. “I need him back, please. He
reminded me that there’s still goodness in this world. There hasn’t
been much joy in my life up until now…” I admitted my voice barely
above a whisper. I wasn’t going to cry. I wasn’t going to cry. I
couldn’t cry.
Ghede Nibo shook his head, took me by my
hand and pulled me away from the table. We walked in silence for a
few minutes. I eyed him intently, hoping that he would speak
already. Was he going to help me or not? He took a deep breath.
When he spoke, his voice was low and miserable as if all of the
life had been sucked out of him. “Arelia, you understand that
spirits can only help those who want to be helped?” He turned to
face me and for the first time I didn’t see merely a spirit, I saw
a young mortal full of conflict and weaknesses. A mortal who had
experienced unspeakable cruelty and horrors.
I nodded. “Yes. I know. Trust me. I’ve
been lectured enough.”
“
I can only show you what
you want to
see.”
“
I know!” I caught myself
getting frustrated and took a deep breath. “I want to see
him.”
He sighed deeply and took a large drag
from his cigar. “Very well. I’ll see you when you come to your
senses.”
He clapped and the ground started to move.
I saw a hand slowly emerge from the unmarked grave where Lucus’
body rested. I watched in morbid fascination as it slowly fought
its way to the surface, tossing aside the earth that stood it its
path. I recognized that hand, with its long and graceful fingers. I
ran over to the spot and watched impatiently, pleadingly, as
another hand emerged and then finally as the body showed itself.
Pure ecstasy washed over me the second I saw his mud-streaked face
with its perfectly sculptured cheekbones and full lips. The yellow
moon bathed him in soft light, which made it seem as if he were an
ethereal being floating its way out of the mucky earth.
“
Lucus!” I
screamed.
Wild tears streamed down my face as his
head turned and his eyes met mine. But wait. There was something
missing. This wasn’t my Lucus. There wasn’t any life behind his
dark eyes. His eyes were narrow, tense pools of misery and anger.
His expression reminded me of Ivan. Not Louis, but Ivan.
I glanced around me and saw that Ghede
Nibo and the dancers had disappeared and had left me alone with
Lucus.
“
Arelia,” he said dryly, as he
dusted the mud off of his signature white t-shirt. “How nice to see
you. You disgust me.”
Chapter Four
Like a Prisoner with the
Cool Iron Bars
I was frozen, unsure of what I had heard.
Cautiously, I walked closer to Lucus and reached out to touch his
hand.
“
Lucus? Are you okay?” Was he
suffering from some kind of post-traumatic disorder? Selective
amnesia? No. That would have been too soap opera-ish. How could I
disgust him all of a sudden? I searched his handsome face for a
hint of the kind, sweet man I had known, but I couldn’t find any
trace of the old Lucus. The hope behind his eyes was replaced by an
intense fire, and the seemingly eternal smile on his lips was now a
threatening smirk, devoid of any compassion.
He freed his hand from mine and positioned
himself against a nearby oak. That tiny gesture was enough to tell
me that he was no longer my Lucus, and I wished for nothing more
than to be pulled out of this horrific illusion, this all-consuming
nightmare that was my life.
The sound of the wind rustling through
the tree leaves became screechy, thin and ghostly. It sang a
strange lament.
Silly, Arelia, you’ve been
warned
You’ve been warned to
listen for the music
Silly, silly, run, run,
run away from this monster
He’s a monster
The monster of your
illusions and fears…
Stubbornly I took several steps
towards him
,
longing to feel his warmth, desperate to run my fingers through his
hair, sniff him and above all to convince him that I hadn’t meant
to harm him.
“
I didn’t know that I would have
to sacrifice you. I didn’t know, but it’s okay now. You’re okay.
I’ve missed you so much. The world went dark after I kissed you
good-bye. All the goodness disappeared. All the light… We can get
through this together. That’s what you said, remember?” My voice
started to tremble with all the emotion I had kept penned up
inside. How long had it been? I wasn’t sure.
He stood silent, achingly beautiful and
completely untouched by my plea. For moments he watched me as if it
were the first time he was actually seeing me. I mentally begged
him to say something, anything. When he remained quiet it suddenly
dawned upon me that he was joking. It was all a big joke. Of course
it was! It had to be. After all, this was Lucus. The same Lucus who
had let me stab him, scream at him, and the list went on and on.
For moments we stood there eyeing one another until finally he
extended his hand invitingly. Unable to contain my enthusiasm I
reached out for it and allowed him to pull me close. My body
effortlessly melted into his and I let out a giant sigh of relief.
I relished his intoxicating smell, the temperature of his body and
strength of his embrace. I let my tears flow freely, not caring how
puffy it would make my face afterwards.
He gently nuzzled my neck and stroked
my lower back. His lips brushed against my left ear and my knees
immediately weakened. All the emptiness, confusion and bitterness I
had felt was replaced by pure, innocent happiness.
“
You’ve missed me, have
you?” he asked.
I didn’t want to hold back how I felt
any longer. I had already wasted too much time with my
indecisiveness and mindless paranoia. “Yes,” I
whispered.
“
How much have you missed
me?” His soft fingers ran down my cheek and across my
lips.
“
So much.” My body
desperately longed for his kiss and the sensation of his body
against mine. My eyes closed and like a rabid dog I sniffed the air
for the scent of sweet jasmine and lilies. It was a scent that
always seemed to manifest every time Lucus kissed me.