“Exactly,” said the wolf. “And she might decide to hunt us down in revenge. She must be eliminated.”
“So,” said Morfael. “Are you asking me to kill her for you?”
All the blood seemed to drain from my body. Growing horror dawned over Caleb’s face.
“We haven’t cast the vote officially yet,” said the lynx. “Let’s not jump the gun.”
“The Moon knows I’m not comfortable around the big cats,” said the rat, “but this one is innocent of any crime. Killing her for convenience is a bit extreme.”
“It’s not for convenience!” snapped the wolf.
“You’d jump at any chance to kill a cat-shifter!” The lynx spat out the words. “Some things never change.”
“As if you don’t dream of ripping one of us apart,” said the hawk. “You’re a hypocrite.”
“Hypocrite?!” exclaimed the rat. “Raptors kill my kind too, don’t forget.”
“We all kill each other, it’s the way of things!” shouted the wolf. “Why should we hesitate to kill one who threatens us all?”
They hated each other. I saw that now. And they hated me, feared me, and wanted me dead. Here were people with abilities and insights normal humans would love to have, and all they did was fight amongst themselves, hide, and kill each other.
“What a stupid waste,” I said.
The shifters stared at me again.
“Shut up, girl,” said the wolf.
“Yes,” said the bear. “You’ve caused enough trouble.”
“I think the three of us agree, she must be . . . dealt with,” said the hawk. “A three-to-two vote carries the motion.”
“Go ahead,” I said. “Go ahead and try.” Caleb was holding my arm very tightly as I leaned forward, my fingers curling like claws. “You’ll be doing the Tribunal’s work for them, and I’m sure they’ll thank you for it!”
The wolf made a scoffing noise, but the bear cocked her head at me.
“We each look after our own tribe,” said the wolf. “As it has always been.”
“Good idea,” I said, matching his tone. “Because it’s worked out beautifully so far.”
The rat let out a short laugh, and the lynx half smiled. Emboldened, I went on. “You’ve been fighting each other for a few thousand years, and in the meantime the Tribunal’s destroyed every tribe on earth except five. That’s five left out of, what—hundreds? If I’m the last tiger and you succeed in killing me, that’s one more snuffed out.
Moon forbid
we help each other and protect each other. It’s far more important to maintain a tradition of isolation and murder.”
The wolf’s brows were ominous, and the hawk looked irritated.
But the bear was nodding. “She’s got a point,” she said. “It’s not as if she’s gone rogue. And if she is the last tiger, well, the humdrums call it genocide.”
“But you just said . . .” began the wolf.
“I’m entitled to change my mind before the official vote.” The bear’s lip curled in a snarl. “Back off.”
“Shall we bring it to a vote?” said the lynx quickly. “Cats vote to allow Desdemona to stay safely at Morfael’s school for the rest of the term.”
“Rats agree,” said the rat.
“Bears agree,” said the bear.
“Wolves vote no!” said the wolf.
“Raptors vote no,” said the hawk, “for all the good it does.” He leaned forward, did something out of sight of the camera, and his window disappeared from the screen.
“Desdemona Grey, you may stay there until the end of term,” said the lynx to me, staring out from the screen with a faint smile. “Hopefully the next vote won’t be quite so . . . dramatic.”
“Thanks,” I said.
“I’ll have to consult with Laurentia’s family,” said the wolf, still glowering. “You can bet, Morfael, they won’t be paying your tuition much longer.”
His window disappeared as well, and with his lethal glare gone, I relaxed. Caleb’s warm hand slid around mine, and our fingers intertwined behind his back, out of sight of the camera. Whatever coldness had been between us had vanished for the moment.
“Remember who stood up for you,” said the rat, and clicked herself away.
“Prove yourself worthy of all this bother, please,” said the bear.
“I’ll e-mail the cat-shifter in the Asian Council,” said the lynx. “Maybe he’s heard something about the tigers or the Tribunal over there that will help us learn more about what happened to your family. Meanwhile, be good.”
She and the bear disappeared from the screen.
I looked up at Morfael’s pale, drawn face, feeling a weird mixture of relief and anger. “If they’d decided to kill me, you were going to help them.”
Something like amusement flickered behind his opal eyes. “Was I?”
“You asked them whether they wanted you to kill her,” Caleb said through his teeth. His lean body was tensed. “I guess my mother was wrong about you.”
But Morfael raised his brows, as if asking me an unspoken question.
“You asked them if they wanted you to kill me,” I said slowly, remembering his exact words, “but you never said you’d actually
do
it.”
A full-fledged smile broke across Morfael’s face, crinkling up his crow’s feet and baring his narrow white teeth. At first he looked like an alien trying to mimic a human expression. But then I saw real warmth behind his strange-colored eyes, and he looked like a real person for the first time.
“How am I ever going to be able to go home?” I said. “Those people will never stand up to the Tribunal.”
“You and your family may go home again,” said Morfael. “But it is up to you to find the way.”
“Up to me?” I stared at his sunken cheeks and bizarre eyes. “You’re the one with the knowledge and experience and the cool magic staff.”
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Caleb’s eyes widen in alarm. Maybe folks didn’t usually talk to Morfael that way.
Morfael considered me, taking his time. He didn’t seem offended. But he didn’t seem pleased either. “Watch, listen, and learn,” he said. “Time to return to your cabins,” he said.
“But . . .”
“Tomorrow your education begins.”
Moments later, Caleb and I stood outside Morfael’s crooked dwelling in the dark. The biting wind whirled around us before it rose to shake the tops of the trees and shove the clouds along.
“That was intense,” Caleb said, staring down at me. His wavy hair was the same color as the star-scattered sky above him, his eyes glistened in the light of the waning moon like pools of black water.
“To put it mildly.” I hugged my arms around myself, cold in spite of my layers. “And Morfael . . . it’s like he knows something, something really important that’ll help me go home, but he won’t tell me what it is.”
“I can’t believe you challenged him like that.” His half smile faded as he took me in. “You okay?”
A deep trembling had overtaken me. “Why does everyone want me dead?”
He slid his coat off and wrapped it around me over my own coat, his lips almost touching my forehead as his arms briefly encircled me. I wanted to bury my face in his neck and feel those arms hold me tight, so tight I’d stop thinking about the hatred on the wolf-shifter’s face. For a moment I thought it might happen, we stood so close. But then he pulled away, rolling his shirtsleeves down against the chill.
“You’re not like anyone else,” he said. “You’re something new. And people fear what they don’t understand. Then they want to get rid of it, so they don’t have to be afraid anymore.”
“You’re not afraid of me,” I said.
He smiled. “You sure about that?”
I nodded. “Even when I was in tiger form, you treated me like a human being, or whatever the heck I am.”
“Such language,” he said, smile widening to a grin. “I’m a caller of shadow. When you’re a girl, I see the tiger lurking inside you. And when you’re a tiger, I still see the girl.”
“I’d never hurt you.” The wind blew a lock of long red hair across my face. “I want to say I’d never hurt anybody, but I did. I killed that man at my house.”
He reached over and brushed the hair out of my eyes. “You were defending your family from a very real threat.”
His fingers grazed my cheek, and my trembling increased. I cleared my throat. “But I was so angry, I couldn’t even stop to think. As soon as I shifted, it just . . . it happened. I don’t want it to happen again without thinking like that.”
“That’s one reason why you’re here,” he said. “It’s very common for young shifters to lose control while in their animal form. Morfael will help you learn to keep hold of your human side after you shift.”
“He’s kind of creepy, isn’t he?” I said, lowering my voice.
“He’s weird, all right,” said Caleb, shoving his hands into his pockets. “There’s a strange vibration around him I’ve never sensed before.”
I wished the wind would blow my hair across my face again, so that he would touch me. “It’s like he’s from another planet, or he’s studying all of us the way scientists study insects.”
“Well, when you think about it,” he said, “we’re not exactly normal ourselves.”
I laughed. “Totally! ‘He’s creepy,’ said the girl who could change into a tiger.”
He chuckled. “ ‘He’s weird,’ said the guy who can turn rocks into mountains.”
The shivering had stopped. It felt so good to laugh. “And I thought it was bad with the brace,” I said. “I thought no one would like me because I was this freak, this untouchable monster. Turns out I’m an even bigger monster . . .” I stopped. I’d just said out loud something I’d never told anyone, even if it came out jokingly.
The smile slid from his face, his dark brows drawing together over his eyes. But the last thing I wanted was for him to feel sorry for me. “Sorry, never mind. Stupid,” I said, shaking my head.
He looked at me another second, his face unreadable, then reached up to close the collar of his coat more tightly around my throat. I pulled back out of reflex, but stopped myself. I felt very small, very vulnerable with him so close. He said, “Anybody ever tell you that you look beautiful in black?”
My whole body grew warm and the back of my neck prickled with goose bumps. I stuttered, “It—it goes with my stripes.”
Did that even make any sense?
“You know, like, when I’m a tiger,” I sounded horribly lame to my own ears, but somehow I didn’t care.
He smiled in a way that twisted my heart. Keeping his hands on the coat collar, he stepped closer. I tilted my head to look up at him. “Don’t ever let anyone make you think you’re untouchable,” he said, sliding one hand around my neck and up into my hair. “Sometimes touching you is all I think about.”
I put my hand to his cheek and felt a deep tremor within. “Are you cold?” I asked.
“No.” His gaze slid down to my mouth.
His lips met mine. I kissed him back without thinking, sliding my hands around him, his heat enveloping me. His arms tightened around me, pressing our bodies together. All my senses expanded. His hands gripped me as if he’d never let go. A small involuntary moan escaped me as I arched into him. His mouth traveled down to my neck, his breath coming fast.
Something in my pocket buzzed. At first I barely noticed it, wanting only to kiss Caleb forever. But then it buzzed again.
He must have felt it too, because he broke away, frowning, and reached into the pocket of his coat, which I was still wearing. He pulled out his vibrating phone.
I swallowed, finding it difficult to wrap my mind around ordinary things like phones. Already I missed the pressure of his arms. But something about his posture struck me as odd as he looked down to see the number of the caller.
“Who could be calling you?” I said. “How do you even have reception out here?”
He shrugged a bit too nonchalantly. “Satellite phone. But wrong number.” He pressed the ignore key and slid the phone quickly into the pocket of his jeans. “It’s just as well.”
“What? Why?” I reached out to him, but he took another step back from me, pulling his coat off my shoulders.
“We should probably get back to our cabins before anyone misses us,” he said.
“They’re not going to care,” I said. “What’s going on?”
He put his coat on and turned away from me, walking toward the boys’ cabin. I followed him a few steps, then stopped. I didn’t want to chase him like a child.
“I can’t do this,” he said, not looking back at me. “I’m too screwed up for you, Dez. Get some rest.”
Then he vanished inside the boys’ cabin. I stood there, freezing again, and replayed the last few seconds in my mind. The way he’d grabbed the phone, scanned the number, and hidden it from me so quickly . . . he was hiding something. He’d lied about what had happened to him in the cave, and he was lying now. He’d kissed me, and I could’ve sworn he wanted to go on kissing me, but something was holding him back. Something to do with that call.
The wind dove down from the treetops and shoved me, so I made my way back into the girls’ cabin. I put my hand to my lips; the memory of that kiss still burned there. My first kiss. And it might be the last if Caleb kept acting this way.