Out Bad (4 page)

After fishing a pair of boxer briefs out of his dresser and
flipping off the light, he used the area rug he spread on the floor of his room
to dust the debris off his feet before climbing onto the king size bed covered
with only a fitted sheet.  The upstairs tended to feel stuffy, even at
night with the central air running.

He sprawled across the bed, watching the ceiling fan in the
dim light of the moon coming through the undressed window.  Normally he
would use the time before falling asleep to mentally plan his work day
tomorrow.  Or maybe run down the list of things he wanted to accomplish on
this place and reorder them by importance.  With as hot as his room was
tonight, new windows and insulation would be at the top.

Instead, he thought of her and all she could mean for his
life. 

 “Damn it.” 

Gwen slowed down as she neared Heath and Gabbi’s
house.  The driveway and curb frontage around the house were all occupied
by various vehicles.  This party must be a bigger deal than she
realized. 

She passed the house and turned around in a neighbor’s
driveway, praying her bumper wouldn't scrape on the pitched driveway as she
backed out slowly and headed back past the house to the closest spot she’d seen
just in front of a white commercial van.  She parked well in front of it,
giving them ample space.  She had no clue how much room they needed to get
that thing out and she didn’t want to find out she underestimated the hard way.

Quickly grabbing her weekender size bag with a change of
clothes in it out of her backseat she headed to the house, wondering as she
passed each car if it belonged to one of the reasons she wasn’t still at
work.  Her hopes began to fade as each car had some sort of child seat
strapped into the back. 

If she wasn’t trying to hurry she would have kicked herself
for being so ridiculous.  Discovering he was happily married with children
would be a good thing.  For him. 

Gwen slowed her pace as she shimmied between the cars in the
driveway to avoid walking through the yard and subsequently sinking four-inch
heel deep into the dirt.  Reaching the door, she quietly let herself
in.  She was late and didn’t want to point it out if she could help
it. 

She was met by the sound of voices laughing and chatting at
the back of the house.  She turned and quickly headed down the hall to the
bedrooms, hoping to change and sneak into the crowd before anyone noticed.

A loud voice from the group made her turn to be sure no one
was heading her way and she ran smack into something… someone. 

The scent of sandalwood mixed with the clean freshness of
the ocean surrounded her.  She froze as each and every hair on her body
stood at attention. 

She didn’t have to look to know who the body she was
currently pressed tightly against belonged to.  Every cell in her body
already knew.

Gwen took a step back, not daring to look at him until the
intimacy of his eyes and mouth being mere inches from hers was gone.

She stood nearly as tall as Joe was in her heels, but his
body was so much larger than she remembered.  His hair was pulled back
today, and he wore a long-sleeved black shirt, stretched tight across his
shoulders and chest.  Dark wash blue jeans hung from his hips and rested
heavily on his black boots.  Barely peeking out from the skin covering his
face and angular jaw was stubble so dark it was almost black.  The urge to
reach up and touch it had her gripping the strap of her bag so tightly her
fingers began to go numb.

He stood unmoving, his dark eyes never leaving her
face.  She guessed many people would be intimidated by his gaze and
imposing presence, men and women alike.  She was not.  Quite the
opposite unfortunately. 

Instead, every part of her wanted only to be pressed back
against the weight, the heat, the strength, of his body.  Closing her eyes
as the scent of him surrounded her, Gwen tried desperately to regain control
over her body and mind.  Being intimidated would have been better. 
That she could have handled.  This, whatever this was, was outside her
area of expertise.  Far, far outside.

It'd been so long since she had been affected by a man at
all, let alone like this.  She’d always believed attraction and desire
were a conscious choice, but now, standing here alone in the hallway with a man
she’d only met once, she was not so sure.

“I didn’t mean to startle you.”  His voice was just as
deep and smooth as she remembered.  She could imagine the way it would
sound as it rumbled through his chest.  If he’d spoken two seconds ago,
she wouldn’t have to imagine.

“I was headed back to change.”  She forced her mouth
shut, stopping the never ending line of things she wanted to say before they
had a chance to come flying out.

His dark eyes gave her a quick once over, not even
hesitating on any of her finer attributes.  “You are a little
overdressed.”

“I came from work.”  Good.  Keep the answers
short. 

She needed to move past him, but her feet stubbornly stayed
planted right where they were, as if he had a gravitational pull keeping her
close, trying to pull her closer.

“Gwen!  You made it.”  She turned at Gabbi’s voice
behind her. 

Her sister stopped dead in her tracks when she caught site
of Joe.  Her eyes darted back and forth between the two of them nervously.

“Um.”  She looked Gwen up and down.  Her eyes
landed on the giant bag she had slung over her shoulder.  “Did you need to
change?”

“Yes.  I was on my way when I ran into Joe.”  The
front of her body tingled at the memory of being pressed against him. 

Her sister was beside her almost immediately with a firm
grip on her arm, leading her back to the girls’ room.  “You need to
change.  We are getting ready to eat.”  She turned back to Joe. 

“Heath needs help laying all the food out.” 

Joe nodded before giving Gwen one last look, but turned away
before she could read the change that had suddenly come across his face. 
Disappointment?  She couldn’t tell, or maybe it was just wishful thinking,
but something about her sister showing up seemed to take his mood in a very
different direction.

Gabbi was stronger than Gwen remembered, her fingers biting
into the inside of Gwen's elbow as she all but shoved her down the hall and
into the girls’ bedroom, quickly closing the door behind them. 

Gwen tossed her bag on the pink fluff covered bed and
unzipped it, digging out her change of clothes.  “What in the heck was
that about?”

Gabbi stood like a deer in the headlights, her back pressed
against the closed door.  “What?”

 “You just drug me down a hall and locked me in a
room.”  She reached behind her, unzipping her skirt as she kicked off her
shoes.  “Then you basically yelled at that poor man.”  She stepped
out of her skirt and pulled on her jean shorts then skimmed her silky work
shirt over her head and tugged on a soft grey t-shirt in its place.  “Why
are you being weird?”

“I was just surprised to see you.”

Gwen slid one foot into her braided sandal, hooking the back
over her heel with the flip of a finger.  “You invited me.  I told
you I would come.” 

“I know.  I was just surprised to see you right
then.”  Gabbi was still plastered to the door, but seemed to be relaxing
just a bit.  Maybe the stress of getting everything together had her on
edge.

“I know.  I’m sorry was a little late.  Work was
crazy and traffic was worse.”  Gwen folded her clothes and packed them in
her bag, but left her shoes on the floor.  The girls loved trying to
teeter around in her high-heels and they’d be thrilled if they found
them. 

She zipped the bag and turned to Gabbi.  “I’m ready.”

Her sister stayed put, the odd look from earlier creeping
back onto her face.  “Could you just…”

Gwen waited for her to finish her sentence.  After a
few seconds of silence, she raised her eyebrows.  “Could I what?”

Gabbi blew out a breath she must have been holding. 
“Never mind.  I forgot what I was going to say.” 

“Okay then.  Let’s go.”  Gwen didn’t feel like
arguing with her.  She had skipped lunch to be sure she would get here
tonight and she was beyond starving.

“All right.”  Gabbi slowly turned and opened the door.

The smell of barbeque hit Gwen the minute the door
opened.  Somehow she’d missed it before.  Probably because all her
senses were focused in one very specific place.

Gwen’s stomach growled and she hurried down the hall, this
time she was the one dragging her sister.  She wanted a big plate of
food.  More than that, she wanted to see if this crazy fascination she had
with Joe would be coming to an abrupt and disappointing end.  Part of her
kind of hoped it would. 

****

Joe helped Heath lay the food across the island in the
center of the kitchen while friends and family of the birthday boy milled
around them and spilled into the family room.  It was a packed house and
Gabbi had prepared enough food to feed an army. 

He tried to focus on what he was doing, peeking inside each
covered dish looking for something more interesting than the woman undressing
on the other side of the house, trying to think about anything but the woman
who just a few minutes ago, inadvertently pressed herself against him. He
struggled to keep his eyes off the doorway that led to the front of the house,
but every time he moved, the scent of her perfume wafted around him, rising up
from the center of his shirt were her chest rubbed against his, reminding him
she would appear in that doorway any second.

 “You expecting somebody?”  Heath must have caught
one of his many glances and was now staring at him expectantly.   

Just then, Gabbi came walking through the door, shooting
Heath an apologetic look.  Right behind her, looking very different than
she did ten minutes ago was Gwen. 

She’d changed out of the tight black skirt that fell just
below her knees and the silky top she wore with it, into a pair of tiny jean
shorts and a grey t-shirt.  The heels that could easily serve as a weapon
had been switched out for a pair of flat sandals.  Her eyes scanned the
crowd, probably searching for familiar faces.

“Shit.”  Heath cursed under his breath just as Gwen’s
eyes landed on Joe.  He thought she almost smiled, her lips twitching at
the corners, before she quickly turned away and stepped into the crowded room.

He could hear Gabbi whispering to Heath behind him, her
words louder than she realized as she tried to be heard over the noise of the
group.  “I didn’t think she would come, and I certainly didn't think they
would be like this.” 

Heath whispered something back Joe couldn’t make out. 
He was much better at not being heard than his wife.  It was probably a
job requirement.

The low whispering ended and his friend stepped forward,
raising his voice so he could be heard above the chatting. “Foods up for
whoever wants to stuff themselves with some of my wife’s good cooking.” 

Joe stepped back, clearing the way for people to start
filing around the kitchen island and pile their plates high with ribs, beans,
macaroni and cheese and corn pudding.  As the kitchen became crowded, he
stepped back even further into the front room both to avoid being in the way
and to secure a little personal space.

A few seconds later he was joined by Gabbi.  She
pointed to the couch.  “I need to talk to you.” 

She sat down, positioning herself so she could keep an eye
on the door to the kitchen, and waited for him to join her before she
started. 

“You need to stay away from my sister.”  Her bluntness
surprised him.  Apparently she didn’t feel like easing into this
conversation.

“I’m starting to get a complex.  I thought you guys
liked me.” 

Gabbi and Heath had been so good to him over the years, but
the cold hard truth was that maybe they were okay being friends with a
convicted felon, but welcoming him into the family was a different story.

Gabbi sighed.  “We do.  We love you.  That’s
why we want you to forget she exists.  Just for a while.”

Joe stared at her.  She wasn’t making any sense. 
Wouldn’t you want someone you love to be with your sister?  Someone you
knew was a good man? 

“Why?”

Gabbi sighed as she rubbed her temples, eyes closed. 
She finally opened her eyes and checked to be sure the door was clear. 
“Gwen isn't really in a place to be with someone the way you want to be with
someone right now.  Even if she was, I don't think she could ever date a
biker.”

So there it was.  Everything always went back to the
same place.  “So it’s because of my past?” 

Heath and Gabbi were the two people in his life he thought
never judged him for things that he did.  Of all the people in the world,
they had supported him, encouraged him, but when it came down to it, he might
never be able to convince anyone he’d changed.  Even his friends.

Gabbi looked confused.  “No.  Not yours. 
Hers.”

“I don’t understand.” 

“Look, Gwen just came back here.  She’s gone through
some things that have changed her whole life.”  She paused as her eyes
flicked to the door, then continued.  “She's had a really hard time with
it, and I just don't want you to get your hopes up that she can be what you
want her to be right now.  All the things that are so important to you,
she's just not ready to think about again.”

"What things?"

"Marriage for starters."

He was stunned.  It had never occurred to him there
would be a woman who would not be interested in a home, a husband who worked
hard, kids.  Now he was faced with the fact that all those things he was
working so hard to offer in the hopes it would offset his transgressions, might
not be of any interest to the only woman who had caught his eye in years.

 "She isn't like me Joe.  She's had things
happen and they changed her.  Changed her whole life."  Gabbi
sighed and shook her head.  "She's become very successful in her
career, but I think working with a bunch of men all day, having to prove she's
just as capable as they are has made her a little… aggressive and… hard.”

Joe immediately thought back to her reaction to the drunk
man at the bar.  More her lack of reaction actually.  The guy’s
behavior hadn’t even seemed to faze her.  Most women would have freaked
out.  She hadn’t.  She handled the situation easily without looking
for anyone’s help.  It was one of the things he found most intriguing
about her.  She was so calm and confident.  Clearly capable of
handling whatever she needed to. 

Now he was realizing that very thing he considered an
attribute, might be his undoing in her mind.  The future he’d laid out for
himself, the one he’d been working so hard to achieve, depended on a woman he
could care for.  Provide for.  Have children with.  Be partners
in life, handling a house and home together as a team.