Authors: Patricia Hagan
Gasps went up, but before the excitement could drown him out, the officer cried loudly, “Listen to me. There’s more. Sherman is reported to be moving toward Georgia, after Johnston. Our scouts have told us that Grant is crossing the Rapidan and is on the move. We have just received this word, and each of you is to return to your companies for further orders now.”
The men began leaving the room. A few stayed behind to confer with the officer who had been speaking. April saw that Rance was one of these and knew she had a few moments respite before he would look for her.
She felt a chill beginning deep within, a chill of terror. The Yankees were heading for Richmond! Would the Rebels be able to stop them? And Sherman. What was it that officer had said about Sherman? He was marching for Georgia. Did that mean he would eventually attack Alabama…and Montgomery…and possibly destroy Pinehurst? Now she felt the need to return home more strongly than ever. There was nothing she could do in the way of defense, but at least she could
be there.
It was better than doing nothing. It was certainly better than sitting and waiting for Grant to attack Richmond.
She turned and hurried through the courtyard, heading back toward the ballroom.
Rance would have to see the wisdom in letting her go. He would be going to battle. What was to become of her? He could not leave her locked in the hotel room.
Word had spread quickly. Even the guard at the door looked alarmed. She pushed by him, eyes scanning the room for Rance. Everywhere the officers were taking their ladies in tow, preparing to leave. An air of suspense and, yes, stark terror was bearing down on them with an invisible but smothering force.
Then she saw him, striding purposefully toward her. She caught his arms, stared up into his stormy brown eyes and cried, “I heard, Rance. I know what’s happening. You must let me leave. You can’t expect me to just sit here and wait for Grant to attack the city. And with Sherman marching toward Georgia…my God, he could attack in Alabama, too.”
His face contorted angrily as he demanded, “Just how the hell do you know all this, April?”
“I was outside the window, in the courtyard. I heard it all. Oh, does it matter?” She implored, “Rance, please. Let me go. There’s nothing for me here.”
He stared at her for a long time before speaking, then murmured, “No, I guess there’s not. I guess I’ve been wrong about a lot of things. But you’re crazy to want to go running back to Alabama and that devil sister of yours. You’ll be safer here. I have to ride with Stuart. I want to ride with him. All hell is about to break loose in this infernal war, and every man will be needed. I’ll see that you’re taken care of here. Richmond will be well defended, rest assured.”
“No!” She gripped his arms. “I’ll find a way, somehow, to leave. Damn you, why do you insist on keeping me? I don’t love you. You don’t love me. Its madness, it’s—”
He grabbed her arm, squeezing painfully as he steered her toward the stairs. “I’ve listened to all of this I’m going to, April. I’m a fool. I dared to think—”
He stopped short. They had reached the second floor. April looked up at his face, saw the tight set, the quickly narrowing eyes, felt his tension. Slowly she followed his gaze.
Kaid Blackmon was standing before them, towering ominously, legs spread wide apart in a challenging stance. His right hand was poised only inches from the gun in his holster. “I come to talk to you, Taggart,” he said quietly. “No trouble. Just talk. Had a time trackin’ you here, but I did. And now we’re goin’ to talk.”
Rance showed no fear of the man. “Do you want to talk here or in my room?”
“Wherever. Might be best in private.”
A few people were hurrying by, officers with anxious faces, women crying.
Rance led the way to his room, keeping April close to him. Inside, Rance pointed toward a chair and she took it gratefully, sitting down to grip the arms and watch the two men as they faced each other.
Rance removed his spotless white gloves. “All right, Blackmon. What’s on your mind?”
“I just heard the word from a lieutenant headin’ out. Grant’s crossing the river. I’ll get to the point.” Tobacco dripped from the corner of his mouth. He looked around for a spitoon and, not finding one, crossed to the window and spat. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he faced Rance again. “April wants to go to Alabama. I’ll take her.”
Rance sneered. “Even if she wanted to go with you, how do you figure you can take her? We’ve got a huge battle coming up. Every man is needed.”
“I’m desertin’, Captain. It’s that simple. I’ve done my share for the Confederacy. And I’m sick of this damn war. I’ll kill any man that tries to stop me.”
Rance laughed. “I doubt you’ll even be missed, Blackmon. From what I hear, you were never good for anything anyway, except raping helpless women prisoners.”
Blackmon took a menacing step forward. “That’s a goddamned lie.” Rance did not retreat. He did not move a muscle. Blackmon sized him up, then snapped, “I didn’t come here to jaw with you. April wants to go with me, and I’m takin’ her back to Alabama, just like I promised her I would.”
April was a storm of emotions. She desperately wanted to leave Richmond. But go with Kaid? The thought sickened her. Still, Rance did not love her, and whatever feelings she had for him were, she knew, probably never to be returned.
“You won her in a horse race, and that’s how come you figure she belongs to you, right?” Blackmon asked.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Damn! She was getting tired of being nothing more to any man except a possession. Was she simply going to sit here and let them talk about her? Decide her fate as though she were a mule to be traded from one to the other? Before she would allow any further indignities, she would make up her mind. Quickly, she said hoarsely, avoiding Rance’s eyes, “I will go with him. I choose to. Let’s not talk about it anymore.”
Rance was silent, and she began to feel panic well up in her. Well, why didn’t he
say
something? Would he try to stop her, tell her he
did
love her? Was he finally going to admit his feelings for her?
A second passed and then another, and when she could not stand the silence any longer, she rose from her chair—still avoiding Rance’s gaze—and moved a step toward Blackmon.
“There is nothing for me here. Yes, I’ll go with you, Kaid,” she said, her voice quavering. She hoped to God that she could trust him not to touch her. But there was no way she could stay here now, knowing how little Rance cared for her. “I’ll meet you in the morning, at the stables. Good night.”
She still had not looked at Rance. Now she walked to the door and through it without a single glance backward, keeping her back straight and her face set. She went into her own room, closed the door behind her, and leaned against it, staring ahead without seeing.
A few hours later, when the hotel was quiet for the night, April lay in bed, wide awake, studying the ceiling. When she heard her door open softly, she knew who it was without turning to look, and joy began gathering in her.
He stopped at the foot of her bed and gazed down at her. She returned his gaze. Neither spoke for several moments.
“I won’t see you again after tomorrow,” Rance said finally. “I came to say good-bye…and to wish you luck with your protector.” He did not try to keep the sarcasm from his voice, and she bristled instantly.
“Will I be worse off with Kaid than I have been with you? He’ll keep his hands off me.”
“Aren’t you tired of pretending you don’t want me, April?” he asked quietly. Without waiting for her answer, he sat down beside her and drew back the covers. Looking deeply into her eyes, he reached over and touched her thigh, feeling the warmth of her through the thin cotton nightgown.
April shuddered. She wanted to return his touch. But if she did, would he taunt her, make her admit that she wanted him? His hand moved upward and he leaned over to kiss her, a burning kiss that went on and on. She responded, returning his passion with hers, and her arms twined around his neck, pulling him closer. In that one endless kiss, the world receded and there was only their desire.
Rance moved back slowly, briefly touching her face with his fingers, letting them trail down over the smooth cheek to her stubborn little chin.
Suddenly he chuckled softly and began dancing his fingers slowly over her thighs and belly.
“Years ago,” he murmured huskily, “I used to have fantasies about taming your wild spirit. Whenever I saw you at Pinehurst, I wondered about you. I think I desired you even then.”
A puzzled frown furrowed her brow and he said, “No, I never cared for Vanessa. It was always you who intrigued me.”
April relaxed again, and his stroking became hotter, more insistent. She writhed beneath his hands, and he bent for another kiss.
She felt his fingers parting the soft flesh between her thighs and could not suppress the moan of pleasure which escaped her trembling lips as he began to caress her. Sweet hot flames of ecstasy shot into her innermost recesses.
He continued to stroke rhythmically while they kissed. Then, raising his head, he whispered harshly, “Say you want me, April. Say you want me.”
She could no longer resist him. “Yes, damn you,” she whispered hoarsely. “I want you.”
No man,
she thought,
has ever made me feel this way…like living and dying all rolled into one.
He wanted her as desperately as she did him. Quickly shedding his clothes, he mounted her, plunging himself all the way in, thrusting his hips to and fro, forcing himself to hold back…hold back until he felt her heels digging into his back, her nails clawing at the flesh of his shoulders. Only then did he allow himself the ultimate glory.
Afterward, he held her against him. She cradled her head against his shoulder, her fingertips entwining the damp curling hairs of his chest. She could not fight him, not ever again. She was happy here, happier lying in his arms than she had ever been in her life, and she would not let pride keep her from admitting that. She would tell Rance she loved him, and pray that he would not taunt her any more.
“Rance,” she began.
Rance held her lovingly, gazing down into her face. “I love you, April,” he told her, letting go to touch her face lovingly with one hand. “I think I always have, but I thought that damned plantation meant more to you than me or any man ever could.”
“I guess I was foolish enough to think that, too,” she admitted, her heart pounding tremulously at his nearness, at the realization that he did, truly, love her. “And I thought I was just a possession to you…something to own.”
He laughed softly, smiling down at her in adoration. “Oh, yes, you are a possession, my beauty, and you always will be. I intend to own you, in bed and out, for the rest of my life. But I was ready to give you up, because I figured that’s what you wanted. I needed to know that you really loved me, April. And
that’s all I was waiting for.”
They kissed again for long, precious moments. Then he said, “Let’s declare a truce, my love. There never was any question of my letting you go—not with Blackmon or anyone else. You’re mine, and I’ll never let you go.”
A splintering crash drove them apart, Rance leaping to his feet. Framed in the doorway stood Kaid, his face black with rage.
“So,
Darlin’
,”
he sneered, his voice shaking with fury, “you enjoy doing it with this one! You never cared for me, not at all, no matter how much I loved you.”
As Rance turned away, reaching for his gun, Kaid shrieked at April, “You never cared for me! You just used me, damn you! Used me!”
She was never sure, later, exactly how it happened. Kaid was screaming at her, his face contorted with the most awful fury she had ever seen. The next instant, a shot rang out and she was covered with blood. As she heard her own terrified screams, she realized it was not her own blood but Rance’s blood that splashed onto her face, her neck, her bosom. And then she knew no more.
Chapter Thirty-One
Numbed by sorrow, April had lost track of the time they had been traveling. Each time she closed her eyes the image of Rance lying in a spreading pool of his own blood returned with stark horror.
Dead.
The word ripped its way through her mind, stunning her with grief. Dead, and only moments after they had both realized how deeply they really loved one another. It was unspeakably cruel. She silently cursed the God who had let this happen.
She no longer cared whether they ever reached Alabama. She did not care if Kaid made good his frequent threats to kill her. She numbly did as she was told, riding the train, being tossed up onto a stolen horse once they reached Wilmington, riding through swamps and woodlands with the sun beating down fiercely.
At night, Kaid would camp far away from the main roads, forcing her to eat whatever he could kill in the woods. A rabbit. A squirrel. Once, there was only a rattlesnake, cooked over a fire after it was skinned.
He would laugh evilly. “Me and you are gonna be together for a long, long time. We made a deal. I take you back to that fancy plantation of yours, and then me and you just might even get married.”
Strangely, he never tried to touch her, not ever. His love for her had turned wholly to hate, but he didn’t molest her or even suggest it. It was the single mercy in April’s life, and she was grateful.