Authors: Elizabeth Seckman
“Understand what, Tres? That you’re here to rescue her?”
“That she owes it to Tanner and me to be here.”
“And she will be. Tomorrow. She did all she could.”
“The hell she did. She knows I could help her.”
“Rescue her.”
“Stop it, Mother. You make it sound like it’s some kind of crime.”
“No, it’s not a crime. It’s just quite chauvinistic. Just give her a little space, Tres, she’ll come around.”
Tres remained silent. He wasn’t about to debate women’s issues with her. He always respected Jenna. She knew that. What a time to be proud. And stubborn. At least with him. Hell, she’d let his mother help her before him. And Jake. Jake she trusted. Him she would lean on.
“Tres? You all right?”
“Yeah, I’m great. Right now I have a sum total of zero going right in my life. So, yeah, Mother, it’s all good.”
“It’s always darkest...”
Tres interrupted his mother before she could finish, “Don’t give me platitudes, Mother. I’m not in the mood.”
Barbara remained quiet for a moment before she sighed and apologized one last time before hanging up her phone.
“Don’t tell me it’s more bad news?” Maureen asked as she limped into the kitchen. Tres hung up the phone and paced the room.
“Jenna will be home tomorrow.”
“Really?” Maureen’s step moved a little lighter as she filled the coffee maker with water and coffee grounds clicking on the power. It immediately started gurgling and hissing, the aroma of perfectly measured coffee filling the air. “Well, that’s a good thing, right?”
“She could have come home today, if she’d ever trust me.”
“I don’t understand.” Maureen sat and rubbed her hip.
“She stayed voluntarily. She could be here right now if she would have just told me what was going on. She knows I would have paid for her to get out of the hospital.”
Maureen blushed and nodded, her lack of surprise not lost on Tres.
“You already knew,” Tres accused. Maureen nodded and studied her lap. Tres shook his head and paced. He groaned and rubbed the stubble on his chin, “It figures.” He looked around the room like a caged animal, “I don’t know why I’m still here. It’s pretty damned obvious Jenna doesn’t need me around.”
“That’s just not true, Tres. Jenna’s just stubborn and proud. She wouldn’t take any help from me either. I offered. Heck, I’ve been trying to help her for years. It’s not just you. As for being here for you and Tanner—there’s nothing more important to her than that.”
“All I know is she’d rather stay in the hospital than ask any favor of me.”
“She’s proud, Tres. If she can’t afford something, she does without. It’s just her way. And the risk of being stuck with a bill worth thousands ... well, she just couldn’t afford that.”
“I can afford it.”
“She doesn’t ever like to borrow. She just doesn’t lean on others,” argued Maureen.
“Not true, Maureen,” Tres said, “She’d have trusted Jake. She’d have let him help her.”
Maureen bit her lip and said nothing. Tres took her silence for agreement. He shook his head, face red, jealousy gnawing at his gut. Maureen scrambled for the right words, then epiphany struck and she blurted, “Well, now, that’s not true. Jake would never have had any money to lend.”
Tres’s voice oozed sarcasm, “Thanks, Maureen, but somehow it doesn’t help.”
“Oh, I...” Maureen stammered.
“Don’t worry about it. I understand Jenna never hid anything from Jake; she trusted him and depended on him. That is just reality, and you can’t change it. I just wonder how the hell I’m supposed to compete with a dead man, or if I even want to.” He pulled his keys from his pocket, “I need some space to think things over. I can’t be here right now. When Jenna gets home, ask her to let me know when she’d like to introduce me to my son. Properly this time, hopefully without fists flying.”
“Please stay. Tomorrow we will—”
“No, I can’t do this a minute longer. I can’t even explain to you how I feel.”
Tres turned to find Tanner blocking the door.
“Can you explain it to me?” Tanner asked.
“Come sit, Tanner. I’ll get you some pie.” Maureen took Tanner’s arm and tried to guide him to a seat. He didn’t budge. His eyes never left Tres’s.
“I’m not hungry, Nanny. I just think I have a right to know what’s going on.”
“Certainly you do,” Maureen agreed. “I just thought we’d wait for your mother to be here before we—”
“So, all of this is up to Mom? What I know, what he knows? Don’t we have some say?”
“Your Nanny’s right,” Tres said as his anger and resentment were replaced with the sudden insecurity of any new parent. “Your mom will be home tomorrow; we will all sit down then.”
“Really? She lies to you for what, fifteen years and you’re just going to let her call the shots?”
Tres stood dumbfounded. He agreed with Tanner, but lacked the confidence of what he should do. He simply stared with the same awe and wonder as if he gazed upon an infant fresh from the womb. This young man was his son. He could now see the resemblance. He looked like a Coulter; it surprised him that he hadn’t recognized the resemblance before. He also recognized the confusion and conflict in the kid’s face. He should say something, some golden words of wisdom, but none came to mind. Kids were foreign territory to him, and he certainly didn’t want a repeat of their hospital interaction.
Tanner waited a few minutes before shaking his head in disgust. “Whatever. I’m going to bed. I guess I’ll talk to you guys when the boss gets home.”
“Tanner,” Maureen called after him and followed as quickly as she could. He never slowed his steps or acknowledged Maureen’s calls to him. He went directly to the spare room, slammed the door and locked it. Maureen knocked until her knuckles were raw. Tres came and pounded until the wood bowed.
He tried talking, “I’m sorry Tanner. I just didn’t know what to say. I don’t want to make things any worse, but you’re right, you deserve to know everything I know. So open the door, all right? I’ll tell you all I can.”
Still no answer. Tres and Maureen waited several long minutes. They looked at each other silently searching for a solution.
“This is enough, Tanner, I’m going to the kitchen to get my spare key and I’m going to open this door. You gonna make your Nanny go to all that trouble?”
Still no answer. The weighted silence sent Maureen scurrying to the junk drawer for the rarely used spare key. She hurried back so out of breath she had to take a seat in the hall and turn the key over to Tres. He slid the key in the lock and turned it, warning Tanner one more time before swinging the door open to an empty room.
Chapter
16
“I swear,” Maureen mumbled as she entered the room and shut the open window. “Shimmied down the drain pipe, just like his dad. Well, like Jake.” Maureen blushed at her mistake and sighed. “Probably headed down to the beach. That’s where he goes when he’s bothered. Got that from his momma.”
“Should you call the sheriff?”
“Oh, no. He can’t be too far. You can catch up with him.”
“Me?” Tres argued.
“Of course. I can’t manage the sand with my hip. It’ll have to be you.”
“I can’t, Maureen. I’ve already screwed up the boy’s mother, now you’re going to trust me with him?”
“Oh, bull. You talk like Jenna’s just gone plum crazy. It was an argument, Tres Coulter. Don’t be makin’ mountains from mole hills.”
“I nearly killed her, Maureen.” Tres turned and hoofed it from the room. For the first time in his entire life he didn’t have a plan or a solution for a problem. He stopped in the hall, hand on the door knob. He wanted to escape, but he couldn’t leave. Though he didn’t know what to do if he stayed, he could not will himself to open the door and flee. Maureen sidled up behind him grabbed hold of his arm and turned him to face her, “You can’t blame yourself for all of this, especially not Jenna’s accident.”
Tres wished he agreed with Maureen, but he knew better. He couldn’t get the image of Jenna begging him not to leave out of his mind. He ignored her pleas; he could have killed her with his anger. “It’s no wonder she doesn’t trust me. I’ve never earned it. I should’ve stayed with her tonight, and then she wouldn’t have wrecked and would be here right now to deal with this. I’m no good for her, Maureen.”
“Listen to me Tres Coulter. Jenna’s wreck was an accident, and she does need you.” She took his face in her hands and forced him to look her in the eye. “She took care of Jake. She never felt like he took care of her. He was a drunken mess and she held him together. You’re a different story. She isn’t trying to push you away. She wants you as an equal. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“She trusted him, not me. All I’ve done is hurt her.”
“Oh, bologna. Forget the wreck. That was an accident. She didn’t do it on purpose and she wasn’t in the middle of a nervous breakdown. She’s made of stiffer stuff than that. She probably hasn’t eaten a real meal in days and it’s hard to tell when her last full night of sleep was.”
“I should never have left her, Maureen.”
“‘Shoulds’ are useless young man. You have right now, and you can either choose to dwell on what should be or what you should have done...or you can do what needs doin’ right now.”
The phone rang and interrupted Maureen’s lecture. She patted his cheek gently then grabbed the phone by the door, both her and Tres’s breaths caught in their throats. Maureen relaxed, tucked the phone under her chin and whispered, “It’s Jenna’s father on the phone.” She spoke to him only a moment before she told him to just come on over. She hung up the phone and turned her attention back to Tres. “No sense him sitting all alone worrying. Poor Sam’s feeling as poorly as they come. Hasn’t talked to his daughter in years and is worried sick over her. Jenna asked me to call him when I got home, and I should’ve done it first thing. I’m going to deal with Sam from right now. And you’re going to deal with Tanner. He evidently wants to talk to you. He knows it won’t be me comin’ after him. So get movin’.”
Tres nodded and headed for the door. Two steps forward and he turned and asked, “What do I do when I find him?”
Maureen smiled reassuringly, “Your heart’ll guide you. Just trust in the love you felt when you saw that boy the first time as your own flesh and blood.”
Tres nodded and left.
***
He combed the beach for nearly an hour and was about to lose hope when he saw the flashing lights of a National Park Service SUV. Tres could see inside the vehicle from the glowing dome light. He wasn’t certain, but the passenger appeared to have the same curly hair as Tanner. Tres hurried toward the vehicle, and when he got within a hundred yards, he recognized Tanner’s bent head. Tres tapped on the driver’s window and the ranger rolled it down. Tres quickly introduced himself, stuttering at the point of how to associate himself to Tanner. Tanner spoke up and interjected, “That’s my dad, Ranger Snodgrass.”
“Son, your dad’s...” Ranger Snodgrass stuttered.
“Dead, I know. Well, I thought so too,” Tanner shrugged as if he’d missed a math problem, “You know what they say, life’s full of surprises. Seems that guy’s my dad. Come to bail me out, Padre?”
Ranger Snodgrass looked from Tanner to Tres trying to decide whether or not to release the young man to the older man’s care. He stepped out of the vehicle to talk to Tres, ordering Tanner to stay put. Tres explained the situation as briefly as he could in hushed tones; both glanced across at Tanner occasionally. The ranger seemed mollified and opened his door and told Tanner he was free to go with Mr. Coulter. “But I won’t accept any excuse for wrong doing again. Understood, young man?”
Tanner promised and stood side-by-side with Tres, both quiet until the tail lights of the green vehicle disappeared.
Tres turned to Tanner, “I guess I better take you on home.”
Tanner nodded. They walked in perfect step toward the parking lot, the tension as thick as morning fog. Tres’s feet stopped, Tanner took a few more steps then turned slowly to face him. Tres shook his head and said, his voice low, “Tanner, I don’t know what I’m doing here. I should say something to make this all alright, but I’m not your dad. You know it, and I know it.”
Tanner looked confused. “So you sayin’ you want DNA?”
“No, that’s not what I mean. I’m not talking about DNA. I’m talking about knowing what to say to you, knowing who you are in here.” He tapped Tanner’s chest. “I don’t know those things and I’d be a liar if I said I did. That’s why I wanted to wait on your mom. Not because I don’t want to know you. Not because I don’t want to be a part of your life. And certainly not because I don’t agree with you that we—you and I—have the right to choose what happens here. I agree we are owed some answers. I just don’t know what the hell I’m doing and I don’t want to cause you any more harm.”
“You haven’t hurt me,” Tanner spat.
“No? Then why did you run away? Why were you trying to break into the lighthouse?”
“I wasn’t trying to break in.”
“Just cracked the padlock to see if you could?”
Tanner turned his back to Tres, every muscle in his body as tense as an animal ready to pounce. “So am I in trouble?”