Play Nice (Make the Play Book 3) (15 page)

“Doesn’t this feel like old times?” I link arms with Emmy as we make our way across the dead grass covering Old Man Willis’s property.

“Yeah, it does.” She frowns.

“Hey.” I squeeze her arm. “It’s not like old times though. It’s different.”

Emmy squirms. “I don’t know if I should be here.”

“Nonsense. You totally belong here.”

She sighs, appearing agitated. “I should probably call Taylor. Make sure she doesn’t need me. She’s getting so close to her due date.”

“I’m sure she’ll call you if she needs you,” I say cheerily, trying not to get irritated with how she’s acting. I mean, I knew we wouldn’t be able to slip right back into being best friends, but she had promised to at least make an effort. Right now she’s acting like someone who’s been taken prisoner. I wanted Emmy to hang out with me again, but not out of obligation. “Besides, her aunt and uncle are with her. I’m sure she’s fine.”

“Yeah,” she says, but doesn’t sound convinced. Her gaze scours the field.

“Are you reliving last year?” I ask with a smile. “This is where you and Chris first kissed, right?”

“Not here. It was in his car in front of my house. But it was after a party,” Emmy says. “You were so drunk that he had to give us a ride home.”

“You’re welcome.”

This elicits a smile from Emmy, and that makes me happy. “Yeah, I’ve been meaning to thank you for that,” she banters back. “I haven’t been to a party since Chris went away to college.”

“Then I’m glad I got you out here.”

She peers over at me. “You haven’t been to one this year either, have you?”

“Well, I went to one.” My stomach sours, and it must register on my face, because Emmy offers me an apologetic smile.

“I’m not even sure it’s a good idea for me to be here now. I mean, parties are to flirt and hook up. And I’m certainly not going to be doing that.” Sliding her arm out from under mine, she hugs herself.

“Of course you’re not. That’s why Chris trusted you enough to let you come.” I pause, thinking. “Does Chris know you’re here with
me
?”

“Yeah, he does.” A group of guys amble past us, shooting us appreciative glances. My skin prickles. In the distance I spot Heather and a few of my former friends, but not Talia. I haven’t seen Hayes yet either, but I know he’s here somewhere. Probably with Brady. I keep my eyes peeled for baseball hats. “But he knows you’re with Hayes now and that you’ve changed. And like you said, he trusts
me
.”

The last statement pricks at me like a thorn. I hope she doesn’t see the tiny scar it leaves. And I wonder if people will ever trust me. If they’ll ever truly believe I’ve changed. It seems doubtful. But I’m determined to try, so I push down the negative thoughts.

“Emmy!” A boy’s voice calls out.

My head whips to a group of guys all motioning Emmy over. I grab her arm, but she shakes it off as she greets them.

“It’s okay. They’re harmless,” she says.

I’m about to protest when I catch sight of Hayes across the field. My heart skips a beat at the sight of him, and my breath hitches in my throat. The way I respond to him always surprises me. “All right. I just saw Hayes, so if you’re okay here, I’m gonna go say hi.” I stop, meeting her gaze.

“Yeah, it’s fine,” she speaks slowly. “But thanks for checking.”

The old Ashley never would’ve done that. I can tell that’s what she’s thinking by the look in her eyes. It lifts my spirits. Gives me hope that I can prove to her that I’m new and improved. It might take time, but I know I can do it.

“Sure. I’ll be right back.” I wink. “Hopefully with Hayes.”

While Emmy heads over to the group of guys that were calling out to her, I hurry in Hayes’ direction. My feet clomp in the dirt, voices swirl around me, and the scent of the firepit drifts under my nose. But all I can think about is how good it will feel when Hayes draws me into his arms. My heart swells as I move closer to him. He hasn’t seen me yet because his back is to me. But I know when he does, he’ll throw me that heart-stopping smile of his. I used to think Cal had a heart-stopping smile, but I was wrong. His smile made me feel desire, but it never stopped my heart.

I thought that coming to this party would be hard. I’ve been wanting to attend a party since Hayes and I first started going out, but I was afraid to. I was afraid it would bring up too many bad memories. But it doesn’t. Josh’s kiss with Talia seemed like the worst thing in the world the night that it happened, but now I see that it was a blessing in disguise.

That night was the kick in the pants I needed to turn my life around. For me it had been a pruning of sorts.

I remember my mom pruning the rose bushes when I was younger. It was a tedious process, and when she was done the bushes looked terrible. All scrawny and bare. But when they bloomed into beautiful roses, I knew that wouldn’t have happened without the pruning. It was necessary.

And that’s how I feel.

In the weeks after Josh and Talia’s kiss, my life was dark and desolate. Frayed and damaged, like I’d been cut open, broken apart. But it was because of that night that I eventually ended up with Hayes. It was because of that night that I connected with Henry, and that I’m starting to reconnect with Emmy.

The people in my life now are true friends, people who genuinely care about me. And I never had that before.

Hayes is only a few feet in front of me, but even if he turns around now he won’t see me. A group of people block my path. I’m about to maneuver around them, when I freeze. Talia approaches Hayes. I watch, fully expecting him to tell her to get lost. But if he does, she doesn’t listen. In fact, she’s talking and smiling like they’re friends. I can’t see his face, but I can see hers, and it turns my stomach.

An image flashes in my mind. It’s Hayes’ face the night of that fateful party. He was so lovesick over Talia. And that wasn’t the only time I’ve seen him like that. Over the summer I’d spent enough time with the two of them to see that look over and over. But have I ever seen it directed toward me? I think I have, but I can’t be sure.

Perhaps he still has feelings for her.

I’d been so mean to Hayes in the past. I’d made fun of him. I’d rejected him.

And yet he so easily forgave all that. At least I thought he had.

But could it have been a ploy? A way to get what he really wanted?

Shaking my head, I will the thoughts away. No. Hayes isn’t like that. He doesn’t manipulate. He’s pure and good and kind. Right? Doubt takes root, and I’m not sure. I’m not sure about any of it. The longer Talia stands there talking to Hayes, the more confused I become. It wouldn’t be the first time someone stabbed me in the back, that’s for sure.

You’re worthless.
My mom’s voice rattles in my head, and I fight to breathe evenly.

I was stupid to think that Hayes would like me for me. It was a fantasy. A pipe dream. Like my online videos. It sounded good in theory, but it would never work. Turning away from Hayes, I claw at my throat, struggling to breathe.

“You okay?” A guy I don’t recognize approaches me. He looks older, and he’s pretty hot. When my gaze flickers up to the ball cap on his head, my eyebrows raise.

Suddenly, I’m able to catch my breath. “Are you in college?”

“I am.” He smiles.

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m in town for the weekend, and my younger brother invited me along.” He smiles. “A second ago, I was thinking that it was pretty lame and I was gonna take off.” His gaze travels the length of my body. “But now I think I’ll stay.”

“Because of me?” I ask coyly.

“That depends.” He leans in close. So close I can feel his breath on my face. It makes my head spin. Hayes may want Talia back, but clearly there are still guys who want me. And I’ll be damned if I stick around here playing second fiddle to Talia. “Do you want me to stay?”

“Oh, yeah. I think I’d like that.”

“I’m Bo.” He sticks out his hand.

I shake it. “Ashley.”

“Well, Ashley.” He glances around. “What do you say we go somewhere a little…quieter?”

Warning bells go off in my head, but I silence them. The last time I came to a party I had my heart broken. I’m not going to let it happen a second time. No way will I let Hayes and Talia make a fool of me. This time the joke will be on them.

“Sure.” I allow him to hold my hand and guide me toward the barn at the edge of the property. Beyond that is nothing but darkness and grass, and it causes my stomach to twist a little, but still I follow.

“Ashley?” Emmy jogs over to me, concern on her features. “What’s going on?” Her gaze flutters up to Bo. “Who is this?”

“This is Bo,” I say, a hard edge to my voice. The last thing I need right now is Miss-Goody-Two-Shoes butting into my business.

“Where is Hayes?”

I snort. “Go find out yourself. I’m outta here.”

Bo chuckles, pulling me forward.

“Are you serious?” Emmy asks. “You’re leaving with this guy?”

I throw her a smug look before scurrying to catch up to Bo’s side.

“Unbelievable,” Emmy mutters under her breath.

As we near the barn, all I can see is the disappointed look on Emmy’s face, and I worry I might puke. But then I remember Talia talking with my boyfriend a few moments ago, and my heart hardens back up.

This is what I have to do. It’s the only way to protect myself.

I’m searching the party for Ashley when Talia approaches me. Earlier I’d been talking with the guys when I noticed Ashley and Emmy entering the party. It made my heart swell to see them together again. In fact, it reminded me of old times. Those two were joined at the hip for awhile. Back then I didn’t get it. I had always liked Emmy. She was innocent and raw. So unlike the girls who usually hung with the baseball team. And I couldn’t figure out how Emmy ended up becoming friends with Ashley. I know it was all a ruse then, but I’m certain their friendship will last this time.

Oddly enough, I think Ashley’s a lot more like Emmy than I’d originally thought.

“What do you want, Talia?” I ask, irritated. When I broke away from the guys, all I wanted was to hold my girl in my arms. Not get side tracked by my ex.

“I just wanted to say hi. Geez.” She smiles sweetly.

Other people might fall for her little act, but I don’t. “Since when do you and I say hi?”

“We were friends before we dated. Remember?”

I do remember, but it feels like a lifetime ago. “You were a different person then.”

“This coming from the guy who’s dating Ashley.” Chuckling, she shakes her head. “You know she’s only going out with you to get back at me.”

“You don’t know her anymore. She’s not like that.”

“I can’t believe she has you all fooled like this. Ashley doesn’t change. I’ve known her since we were kids.”

“You never knew her. Not the way I do.”

“You’re really buying into her act, huh? Wow. I thought you were smarter than that.”

That’s it.
I don’t need to stand here and listen to this. I step around Talia. “I’m smart enough to know who to trust, and that sure as hell isn’t you.”

“I’m just trying to protect you,” Talia speaks from over my shoulder. There was a time when I would have believed her, but that ended the minute she kissed Josh. It’s funny to think about how much I liked her back then. Now that I’ve seen what she’s really about, I’m not attracted to her at all. “She will break your heart. Trust me.”

Shaking my head, I stomp over crunchy leaves and yellow grass, trying to get as far from Talia as possible. But no matter how far I walk, I know her words will stick with me. Ashley
is
different. She’s nothing like the person she used to be. And I believe that the Ashley she is around me is the real Ashley. But deep down I worry that this is all just an act, and that one day the former Ashley will return and take over.

I’m starting to fall in love with Ashley, and I can’t stand the thought of her one day tossing me aside like I’m trash. I think of the things she used to say about me. The way that she treated me. It stung even at the time. Now it would kill me.

My gaze scans the field, but I don’t see Ashley. After several minutes of watching students chug alcohol and act crazy, I finally spot Emmy. She’s talking with a few of the younger guys on our team. I don’t see Ashley, but I’m sure Emmy knows where she is.

“Hey, Emmy,” I say when I reach her. “Do you know where Ash is?”

She swallows hard, her neck swelling with the effort. Her face is somber, and a sense of dread drops into my gut.

“I’m sorry, Hayes,” she says, her eyes crinkling in the corners as her face scrunches up in a ravaged look.

“Sorry about what?” My stomach churns.

“She went off with some guy.”

“What guy?”
I’ll kick his ass.

She shakes her head. “I don’t know. He was like college aged.”

Frantically, my head moves back and forth, scouring the area. “Where did he take her?” Adrenaline pumps through my veins.

Her head swivels toward the barn. “I saw them go that way.” Emmy’s hand lands on my arm. “Listen, I don’t think she’s changed the way you think she has. I mean, before she left with him she was acting just like the old Ashley.” She sighs. “I really wanted her to be different. For your sake.”

“She is different,” I insist. None of this makes any sense. We were so happy earlier today. “Emmy, you said she was acting like the old Ashley. In what way?”

“Going off with another guy,” she says as if she’s surprised she has to spell it out.

Something isn’t adding up. “Did something happen when you guys got here. I mean, was she upset or anything?”

“No. Not at first. She kept talking about trying to find you. Then a few minutes after we got here, she said she spotted you. She left for a minute, then came back with some other guy. And it was like she flipped a switch.”

Talia.
She saw me talking to Talia. And she must have misinterpreted it.

“Thanks, Emmy.” I spin around.

“Where are you going?”

“To find her,” I say. “To fix this.” As I stalk away from Emmy, I pray that Ashley hasn’t done anything stupid. I’ll forgive her for going off with that guy, but if I catch her kissing him or touching him or worse, I don’t know if I’ll be able to get past it.

A sense of déjà vu fills me as I head toward the barn. An image of Talia and Josh groping each other fills my mind, and my chest tightens. I silently pray that I don’t find Ashley like that. As I near the barn, I hear noises coming from the other side.

I hesitate, unsure if I want to see what’s on the other side. But I have to. Besides, what if the guy hurts her? Emmy doesn’t know him, and she said he’s older. What if Ashley needs me to protect her?

My nausea grows with every step forward. I round the corner, making my way to the backside of the barn. At the sight in front of me, my stomach tumbles to the ground.

“Ashley?” I rush forward to where she sits on the ground, her back resting against the side of the barn. She lifts her head from her knees, tears raking her cheeks. Her makeup is so smeared she looks like something out of a horror movie. “Are you okay?” My gaze travels down her body, but nothing seems out of place. Other than her tear-stained face and mussed hair, everything else is perfect. “Did he hurt you?”

“Who?”

I press my lips together. “Emmy told me you went off with another guy.”

Her face drops. “I’m sorry, Hayes.” More tears fall from her eyes, and her lips quiver.

I back away from her, feeling my heart crack. “Ash, what did you do?”

“Nothing.” She shakes her head, wiping at her face. “I just went off with him. I only did it to make you jealous, because I’d seen you talking to Talia. But when he tried to kiss me, I couldn’t do it.”

Relief washes over me like the crash of a cool ocean wave on a sweltering day at the beach. But I’m not ready to celebrate quite yet. “Ash, Talia just walked up and started talking to me. I didn’t seek her out. Did you really think I’d go after her again? I’m with you.”

“I know,” she whispers.

“Then why are you so upset?” I’m still dumbfounded by her behavior. None of what she’s saying is adding up.  “What is it that you’re not telling me?”

Breathing deeply, she wipes at her face again. Then she tucks an errant strand of hair behind her ear and lifts her chin. “Do you want to know why I used to be so mean to you? Why I always rejected you?”

“I think I already know the answer to that,” I say. “And quite frankly, I’d rather not rehash it.”

“It wasn’t because I thought you were fat,” she says. “I know that’s what I said, but that was never the truth. The real reason I didn’t want to go out with you was because I was scared.”

“Scared of what?”

“I knew that if I said yes, I’d end up falling for you…and falling scares me.”

“Well, yeah. Falling scares everyone, because if you fall you might break a bone or skin your knee.”

She sighs with exasperation. “Hayes.”

“Sorry. You run when you’re uncomfortable. I make jokes.” I brush a stray lock of hair from her face. “But you don’t need to be scared of falling for me, Ash. I want you to fall, because if you do, I’ll finally get to catch you, and that’s something I’ve been trying to do for years.”

“But what if you drop me?”

“I won’t. Trust me, once I get a hold of you, I’ll never let go.” I wait for relief to fill her face, but it doesn’t. She still looks conflicted. “Ash?”

She bites her bottom lip. “It wasn’t just because I was scared. It was also because I knew you were too good for me.”

I scoot forward on my knees, reaching out to touch her face. “What are you talking about?”

“You’re one of the good guys. I knew that from the moment we met. And I’m poison, Hayes. I destroy everyone in my path.”

“That’s not true.” My thumb grazes the tender flesh of her cheek. There’s still remnants of her tears, and they stick to the pads of my fingers.

“It is true. Ask Emmy. Ask Talia. Hell, ask anyone.”

“Ash, that was in the past. We’ve been through this. You were playing a part, but that’s not who you are.” I press my hand to her chest. “Not deep down in here.”

One side of her lips curl upward a little, and she wraps her fingers around my hand, holding it in place. “Did you ever wonder why I felt the need to play a part?”

“I assumed it was to be popular.” I shrug.

“It was to be perfect. To make up for...” A sob leaps from her mouth. “For what I’ve done.”

“Is this about your grandpa? Because you don’t need to feel guilty about that anymore.”

She shakes her head. “It’s not about that. This is bigger than that.” She exhales, her gaze fixating over my shoulder. “This is about my sister.”

Sister?
“I didn’t know you had a sister.”

“Because she died, and it was my fault.”