Pleasing the Pirate: A Loveswept Historical Romance (12 page)

The footmen carried in bottles of wine and whisked the empty plates away, replacing them with platters of fruit and cheese. Lady Eastman was now conversing with Nicholas Addison, who sat across from her. Claire had turned to Gabrielle, Phin and Lord Eastman were discussing some sort of new tax and Fitzie was broodily sipping his wine. Mairi looked down the table to find Sir Atwater watching her closely.

Unashamed to have been caught, he cocked an eyebrow at her and raised his wineglass. Mairi quickly looked away.

These people were nothing like Mairi had imagined when she’d thought of England.

She’d pictured a country full of people like the soldiers that stomped through her land. She’d imagined a society devoid of compassion, who preyed upon those weaker than they.

Of course she was peering into the upper echelon of society. An entirely different world lived outside these doors and this street. But these people were not the evil monsters she’d built them up to be in her mind.

They laughed. They loved. They ate dinner together. They attended operas. They gave their clothes to women they did not know simply because a friend asked them to. They opened their home to a poor Scottish woman. They accepted her into their circle with nary a second thought.

She couldn’t afford to become attached to these people who had so much money they thought nothing of giving away a gown that cost a hundred pounds at least. Or enough food in
one night that would feed her entire clan for months.

This was not her life, nor did she want it to be. She wanted the open skies of Scotland, devoid of the smoke that hung about London. She wanted the green grass and her friends. How she missed the other women she called sisters.

She watched the footmen carry the plates away. What was left on them could feed several people at home. What a waste. What a waste all of this was. Operas when people were starving. Silk gowns when people were patching their clothes and shivering through the harsh winter.

She glanced over at Phin, who had leaned back in his chair and was watching her. The women talked of clothes and the upcoming opera and the friends they would see there. The men talked of politics and taxation. It could have been any conversation at any dinner table anywhere.

And yet it was here, in England. A place she didn’t want to be. A place she abhorred. Or thought she abhorred. Now she didn’t know what to think anymore.

The women stood, leaving the men behind to enjoy their brandy and their talk. She followed the women to the drawing room, but desperately wanted to escape for just a few moments. She slipped away and made her way down the hall toward the back of the house her shoes making nary a sound on the thick carpet. With a glance behind her to make certain no one noticed she was missing she pushed open a door that took her into what appeared to be a study. It was dark, only one candle lit, but it was enough to see a large desk that seemed to weigh as much as the
Wanderer
, a blotter with a heavy inkwell sitting atop it. But what she was really looking for was the set of double doors that led out to a terrace.

She walked out into the garden, needing more than ever to feel the cool air on her arms. She looked up at the sky, disappointed that there were no stars. Too much smoke, too many people in one place. To think that there were people who would live and die in this city without experiencing one night beneath a sky full of stars or a full moon shining down upon them.

A shadow shifted, drawing her attention and causing her heart to beat faster. She’d been lulled into a sense of safety after being around Phin for so long. She had to remember that just streets away there were starving people willing to do what they needed to feed their families. Just weeks ago she had been in that same situation.
No, Mairi, you’re still in that same situation
.

The shadow moved again and took shape until it was standing before her, his back to her.

She gasped and the shadow whirled around.

“Ezra?”

“Lady Mairi?”

She hadn’t been able to break Ezra from calling her Lady Mairi, and at this point she’d stopped trying.

Ezra was carrying a pistol and had a cutlass hanging at his side.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“Cap’n Phin has us on patrol.”

“Patrol for what?”

He shifted and glanced around. “Just patrol. Best be getting inside, m’lady. You never know who might be lurking about.”

Ezra tipped his head and moved on. Why did Phin have patrols on Sebastian’s land? And what had Ezra meant by never knowing who might be lurking about?

“I believe he was speaking of me.”

With a squeal she just managed to muffle, Mairi wheeled around and came nose to chest with her brother.

“Grant,” she said in surprise, taking a step back.

“Shhh.” He glanced at the house looming behind her then in the direction Ezra had disappeared.

“I wasn’t expecting you to come here.” She looked back at the house as well, half expecting Phin to be watching from the windows, but there was no one there. “What are you doing here?”

“My men tell me that you’ve not only been consorting with Lockwood but Addison as well.” Grant raised a brow.

She’d known he would be angry when he discovered she was friendly with an earl, but she was a bit surprised it was the first thing he mentioned upon seeing her. Did he not wonder how she was? If she was being treated well? Even Fitzie seemed concerned that Phin was treating her well but not her own brother.

“Phin asked me to come to dinner at his friend’s home.” She felt like a naughty child, caught doing something she’d been expressly told not to. And the guilt was never far away.

Grant looked back at the house as if contemplating it, then he looked at her, his gaze taking in her borrowed gown.

She plucked at the skirts, that guilt taking center stage. “I had to travel lightly so
Gabrielle loaned me the gown.”

“Gabrielle? Lady Addison? You’re on first name terms with her?”

Her face heated. “Yes.”

“These people are our enemy, Mairi.”

“I know.” And yet, at dinner, hadn’t she begun to think of them differently? Wasn’t that why she came outside, because she was uncomfortable with her thoughts? Because she was beginning to see them as something other than the enemy?

“Do you?” Again with the raised brow. Their da had done that. Grant was so much like their da that it hurt her heart. But their da would have never come to England to side with France.

She raised her chin, tired of being berated when he knew nothing of what she’d been through. And what she’d been through would not have happened if he’d done what he was supposed to do and come back to Scotland.

“What choice do I have, Grant? I’ve hired Phin to help me and yet I’m also at his mercy. He asked me to attend this dinner party. Should I have said no? Should I have stayed at the Coxswain all alone waiting for you?”

He considered her for the longest time. This man before her was in a lot of ways a stranger and it saddened her to no end that she barely recognized the brother she’d once looked up to.

“I need you to help me, Mairi.”

“Oh, really? What could you possibly need from me, brother?”

He seemed taken aback by her caustic tone and he hesitated a moment too long.

“I’ve come all the way from Scotland to find you and when I finally do you leave me alone for days.” She stepped up to him and poked him in the chest. “Where have you been? You claim I’ve been consorting with our enemy and yet it’s you who have left me with the enemy.” She crossed her arms and glared at him. “Explain yourself.”

His gaze slid away. “I’ve had things I needed to do first.”

“And these things are more important than your sister?”

His jaw clenched. “I need you to stay with Lockwood for a time.”

She blinked, stunned. “Stay with Phin?” The thought of spending more time with Phin Lockwood was strangely appealing and terrifying all at the same time. “But what about our people? I must return to Scotland before winter, and so must you.”

“There are important plans being made, Mairi. Plans that could free Scotland from England. You can help us with those plans.”

“Again with your plans,” she said in disgust. “Don’t you understand how foolish this is, Grant? You can’t change the way England thinks. You can’t bring down one of the greatest countries in the world. There are people at home who are relying on you.”

His lips thinned and he seemed to grow taller before her, his shoulders snapping taut, his fingers balling into fists. She’d never before been afraid of her brother, had always looked to him for protection even if he frustrated her to no end, but for a moment her heart skipped a beat as something evil and dangerous came over Grant. She took half a step back, her gaze going to his balled hands.

“Lady Mairi?”

Grant jerked and took a step into the shadows of the bushes. He put his finger to his lips before disappearing into the shrubbery.

“Are you still out here?” Ezra asked.

“Yes. I just … I was feeling the need for fresh air. And quiet. I won’t be much longer.”

Ezra peered into the shadows surrounding her. “You sure you’re well? You want me to fetch the cap’n?”

“No. I’m fine. I’ll be heading inside soon. I promise.”

Ezra looked around one more time then shrugged and ambled off.

When she could hear him no more Grant emerged from the bushes.

“Thank you,” he said softly.

She nodded, unsure if she’d done the right thing in letting Ezra go. Yet she could never turn her brother over to Phin, for that would be the death of Grant, and no matter what he’d done, he was still her brother.

“We don’t have much time, Mairi. Soon Lockwood’s man will fetch him to tell him you’re out here. Listen to me.” He put his hands on her shoulders, forcing her to look at him. “There are bigger things happening, sister. More important than a few women and a crumbling castle. Sacrifices must be made.”

Her mouth dropped open and she quickly snapped it closed. “Sacrifices?” she hissed into the darkness. “You know
nothing
of the sacrifices we’ve endured. I don’t want to help you with your ill-fated and ill-advised cause. I want you to return home with me and feed and protect our
people.” Her words came out in a harsh whisper that burned her throat.

His expression softened. “Forgive me, Mairi.” He ran a hand through his hair in a gesture that she remembered so well from their youth. “Sometimes I get so caught up in my mission here that I tend to forget that you’ve grown up as well. If it wasn’t for you looking out for our people and our land, I would not be here, and here is where I need to be. I well know the sacrifices you’ve made and that you’ve worked hard to keep everything together. Help me, Mairi. Help
us
. The sooner we can accomplish our goals, the sooner I can return to Scotland and help you with the clan.”

His tone of voice, the entreaty in his eyes softened her anger until it slipped away. She could see the weariness in every line of his body. He was working hard to help Scotland and she should appreciate that more. She should recognize that he was looking at the bigger picture instead of one tiny clan made of women and children.

“What would you need me to do?” she asked warily, still not entirely convinced that this was the right thing to do, but if it brought Grant back to Scotland she was willing to consider it.

“Try to discover what Addison knows about the uprising. I’m looking for anything that I can possibly use against the English.”

“And how do you propose I do that? He certainly does not confide in me. He barely speaks to me.”

“Go back in and find his study. Look through papers on his desk. Listen at doors. I don’t know, Mairi. Improvise. Our parents taught us both to read; use that gift to help me.”

She thought of the room she’d slipped into to escape out to the terrace. That had definitely been Sebastian’s study. Would he have left important papers out? And was she seriously considering spying for her brother?

“How do you know the earl is even aware of, or would have information on, whatever it is you’re involved in?”

“He’s a spy for the crown.”

Shocked silence followed his statement. She’d dined with a spy?

“This is madness.”

“Sebastian Addison is a spy, and the gentleman you dined with, Sir Colin Atwater, is the man he reports to. Lady Addison is not innocent in any of this either, but it’s Lord Addison who concerns me the most. I need you to do this for me, Mairi.”

Addison a spy. Atwater his superior. This
was
madness. All of it. And if it were true?

“You are in over your head, Grant. This is foolish and dangerous.”

“But necessary if Scotland is to break from England.”

“That will never happen.”

He looked at her in disappointment. “You have such little faith. Have the English broken you as well, little one?”

“The English have not broken me, but I have a better understanding than you do of what you’re facing. You do realize that some Scots are not opposed to English rule?”

His lips twisted in derision. “Cowards.”

Laughter drifted from the house, causing both of them to snap their heads in that direction. She’d been out here far too long. Soon they would realize she was missing and Phin would come searching for her.

Grant grabbed her arm. “Do this for me, Mairi.”

She hesitated, thinking quickly. “If I do, will you return to Scotland with me?”

“Yes.”

“When?”

“As soon as I am able.”

“Before winter.”

“That’s mere months away. It’s too soon.”

“Before winter or I’ll not help you.”

His fingers tightened on her arm, but in this she would not back down. She glared up at him until he sighed and loosened his hold.

“Before winter,” he said.

“Promise me. On your word.”

He looked at her for the longest time through the gray shadows. “On my word,” he finally said.

Mairi made her way back to the house, her mind heavy with the conversation she’d just had with her brother. He wanted her to spy. He wanted her to commit treason.