Precious Blessings (Love Inspired) (5 page)

She thought of what her friends and her sisters had said. She did not like this man, not like that, and she wasn't in denial about it. Really. So then, why did her heart crack just as little? And then a little more as she kicked off and away, swooshing over the iced, packed snow, leaving him behind? She could feel his gaze on her back like the press of the cold wind. As she negotiated the next curve, she glanced over her shoulder to see him standing there, looking as alone as she felt.

She spotted Marin and Holly waiting for her and she skidded to a rough-edged halt.

Marin was flushed with excitement. “When I talked
to him on the phone, did I mention to you that I found out he isn't married? He's a widower.”

Katherine couldn't stop the wave of sympathy for him. That was sad. It did explain the lack of a wedding ring.

“Did you see how he was looking at you?”

“Like I was contagious with the bird flu?”

“That's the denial talking.” Holly held up Jack's lost ski. “We would have returned this to him, but we didn't want to interrupt.”

“There was nothing to interrupt.” So maybe she was in a
little
denial. But not much. “I get the strong feeling that Jack doesn't like me at all.”

“He does,” Holly and Marin chimed in unison.

Did they know how wrong they were? Completely. “What do you two know about men? You're both single.”

“Yeah, but we have the experience of many failed relationships between us. Here.” Holly handed her the ski. “Either go up to him or we'll just wait around the next corner and you can wait here for him, since he's bound to come looking for this.”

“Then he'll find it just fine, whether I'm here or not.” She could see him starting down the trail, balancing on one ski. He was on his way down.

There was only one thing to do. She propped the slim black ski, brand-new and newly waxed, against the snow berm where it would be easy for Jack to spot when he limped around the corner. “You two have been plotting while I was talking to Jack.”

“Guilty,” Marin admitted. “He's a great-looking guy. He's a caring father, so I know he has a lot of heart.”

“You can have him then, because his personality isn't so great.” Katherine wasn't sure if that was the whole truth, but Jack's first impression had been a whopper. Remembering how he'd behaved when they'd first met would keep her firmly entrenched in her state of denial. “C'mon, let's get moving.”

“You're just gonna leave the ski?” Holly looked crestfallen. “But, what about our plan? You can't get to know him better if you don't stay, talk, meet him in the lodge for hot drinks.”

“News flash. I don't plan on seeing Jack Munroe ever again even if I have to avoid him. Let's go, he's almost here.” She pushed off, leading the way down the trail. Snow pummeled into her like little wind-driven bullets, and she didn't look back. Didn't want to.

Because she already knew what she'd see. The disappointment on her friends' faces and Jack Munroe wobbling on one ski. Jack Munroe, who'd given her flowers and who had enough problems on his plate. Just because he was a widower didn't mean she was suddenly interested in him. She was pretty sure that Jack was not the man she was looking for.

 

Humiliation was a sad thing. Jack had found his ski, but his dignity had taken a fatal hit. In front of Katherine McKaslin.

Why her, Lord?
He took another sip of strong sweetened tea in the warmth of the lodge's empty auxiliary dining room and tried to squeeze the memory from his mind of glancing up to see Katherine at the top of the ravine, looking like a gift from heaven dappled with snow.

The Lord wasn't answering, and Jack had to accept it. Why he was continuously coming across as a bull in a china shop in front of Katherine might forever remain a mystery. Maybe the trick would be staying away from her. That shouldn't be too hard to do, right?

Right. So stop thinking about her.

Okay, he focused on the view outside the wide picture windows. Stunning. The rugged snow-draped mountain peaks stabbed into the falling veil of snow. Closer in, the mountain slope lay in a pure mantle of white that felt as peaceful as it looked. Out front, just within his view, a half dozen teens on skis were clustered in a half circle around a beginning instructor. Hayden was one of them. She stood at the end, a little farther away than the others. He only saw her from behind but he knew that slump to her shoulders. She was scowling, looking nothing at all like the little girl he remembered.

Where had the time gone? In a blink of an eye, here she was, a teenager, fifteen going on sixteen, and he wasn't ready for it. Something had gone wrong somewhere, and he didn't know what. The move here to Montana, to a smaller city and a slower pace was supposed to fix that. And after the stunt she'd pulled in Katherine's store, it was clear his little girl was a teenager on the edge of trouble. Funny, he'd always blamed the parents for something like that.

But he was simply doing his best.

Maybe finding a church would help with that. He simply hadn't had the time with the move and the adjustment to a new home and job to start searching for
the right one. Thank God for this opportunity. Jack's chest tightened with a mix of emotions he couldn't name except for one. Gratitude. If Hayden was going to act out, it had been a blessing that she'd done so in front of Katherine. That they'd been given this chance to make things right. It was an opportunity he refused to waste, and he wouldn't let Hayden waste it either.

Katherine.
His guts knotted when he thought of her. Maybe the Lord was trying to tell him something. Like give up any thoughts of dating. You aren't cut out for it. Not that he'd been thinking on that real hard, but some of the guys at work were more than happy to offer to set him up. He'd turned them down, so far. He was doing fine enough on his own, right?

Well, as tough as it was to admit, not really.

“More tea, sir?” The sunny waitress breezed up to his corner table with another pot of steaming water.

Not in a sunny mood, he gave a gruff nod and kept his attention on Hayden. The snow was falling harder now, shadowing the kids so that it was hard to see them as they followed their instructor, sidestepping toward the beginner's run. He watched Hayden's blue parka grow smaller and disappear over a rise.

That's when he felt it, a flicker of emotion stretching tight right behind his sternum and then popping free, like a rubber band snapping. What was that?

He didn't have to look around to know who was coming his way. For some unfathomable reason, he could feel the string pulling tight again, right over his heart the moment he saw Katherine enter the dining room.

His gut instinct told him to duck, but it was too late.

T
hat man sitting at the window…there was something familiar about those mile-wide shoulders and the tidy shock of black hair. His posture was as rigid as a seasoned soldier's, and she'd seen that black parka before.

Jack Munroe. Her feet froze in place in the archway between the lodge's main restaurant and the practically empty room. Maybe he hadn't spotted her. It wasn't too late to tiptoe back out of the room.

Don't be silly, she told herself. She'd planned never to see Jack Munroe again. This was a coincidence, not divine intervention or her secret wish. She'd simply find a quiet table on the far side of the dining room, pull out her book and wait for Holly and Marin to find her. She didn't have to look in Jack's direction whatsoever.

Luck might be in her favor. With the way he was gazing out the window, he might not even notice her. She could walk right past him.
If
he did happen to look
her way, she'd toss him a polite smile. It sounded like a good plan.

So why did her feet take on a mind of their own and lead her to his table? “Did you ever find your lost ski?”

There wasn't an ounce of surprise on his chiseled face as he pivoted in his chair and fastened his gaze on hers. Total control emanated from him like cold from the window. “I did. After a few more runs, skiing came back to me.”

“Good.” Katherine hadn't spotted him on the advanced runs, so she guessed he'd tried a less challenging trail.

Well, she hadn't intended to chat and didn't want to. Time to make her escape. But the instant she took a step, his hand shot out and his fingers curled around her wrist. The shock of the contact startled them both.

“You can't go yet.” He released her, but his gaze was pure black steel. “Not until I apologize.”

She didn't know if it was fury at his overbearing manner or something like interest that froze her in place. The imprint of Jack's hand felt like a brand on her arm. “Apologize? For which offense?”

“Are there that many?”

“You know the answer to that.”

“Sorry. I just—” Jack shook his head. What was he thinking? It had been a mistake to stop her. A mistake not to have kept as much distance between them as possible. “Is there any way we can start over?”

“Start over with what?”

She was going to make this as hard as possible. He squared his shoulders, ready to take a direct rejection. “We can pretend we didn't meet the way we did.”

“You mean with your daughter stealing from my family's store and you trying to run over me with your car?” Her soft dainty mouth tightened into a thin line. One slim eyebrow shot up as if he'd insulted her.

She wasn't insulted, he realized. She was too nice a woman for that. He stood and pulled out the chair next to him. Watched deeper emotions play in her captivating eyes.

Whenever he was around her, he felt off-balance, as if he'd lost his center, his footing, everything he was sure of. Maybe she felt this, too. “If you can put those things behind you, I'd like to try again.”

“What makes you think I want to?”

“Just a hunch. Cop's instinct.”

“Let me guess. Your hunches are wrong a lot, aren't they?”

“You'll have to sit down and find out.”

“Too bad I'm not the least bit curious.” She smiled, and it was genuine. Her earlier veneer of politeness had vanished.

Did she have any idea of the effect she had on him? With her heart shining in her gentle eyes and shaping her sweet smile, he could see her brightness and goodness as clearly as the dimples in her cheeks.

It took all his effort to sound like a normal, unfazed guy just having a cup of tea. He tugged the chair beside him out a little more. “C'mon. Let's start over. I'm Jack Munroe.”

“Are you always this bossy?”

“Mostly. It's what I do best.”

That made her laugh. He liked the sound, quiet and sweet, just like her. “Being bossy isn't the best.”

“It is when most of my traits are worse.” He stood and held out his hand. “It's nice to meet you, Katherine. Sit down and have a cup of tea with me.”

To his surprise, she placed her hand in his so they were palm to palm. But the casual contact didn't feel casual at all. Air shot out of his lungs and, overwhelmed, his every sense stilled.

Katherine didn't seem affected as she withdrew her slender hand and smoothly slipped into the empty chair. “I'm not sure this is a good idea.”

“Sure it is.” He commandeered a clean cup from the place setting on the neighboring table and poured. He'd have the waitress add it to his bill on her next pass through.

He pushed the steaming cup in her direction. She was just sitting there, looking elegant in a purple fuzzy sweater and wash-worn jeans. “Overconfidence is one of my other bad traits. Luckily I'm usually right. I get that you were up here to ski with your friends. Do you do that a lot?”

“At least once a week during the ski season. Why do you look so surprised?”

“Because you look like you belong on that figurine shelf in your store.”

That was like a blow to her heart. Katherine reached for the sugar jar, noticed her hand was shaking and willed it to stop. “You think I'm cold. Remote. I've heard it before.”

“Not even close. I meant that you look too elegant to know how to attack the advanced run like a pro.” He
paused to study her face. He must have caught some hint of the pain his comment had caused because he grimaced. “Now you know why I've never been able to remarry.”

“Because you scare your dates away?”

“So fast that many have not waited until the meal was over to bolt.”

That didn't surprise her either. “You do have a charming personality.”

“Funny, I don't hear that often.” He shrugged those big shoulders of his in an oh-well gesture. Apparently he'd been told this so often, it was hardly a blip on his radar screen.

At least he had a sense of humor, which was a redeeming quality.
Not
that she was noticing. She stirred sugar into her cup of tea. “I'm a little too tidy for most people. My sisters say I'm obsessive compulsive.”

“You're just super-organized.”

“True. Do you understand, because you're, uh,
super-organized,
too?”

“Guilty.”

As she nudged the sugar jar in his direction, he reached before she let go and their fingers brushed. It was the slightest contact, but her heart stilled.

Okay, she was going to stay in denial about that, too.

“What happened to your friends?”

“Marin is leading the kids' prayer meeting. Holly is checking on her merchandise in the lodge's gift shop. She's a jewelry designer. So I thought I'd find someplace quiet and read while I wait for them.”

“Read?”

“From my book.” Which she pulled out of her bag. An Inspirational romance. “Marin mentioned that Hayden had joined the youth group ski program.”

“I hope she's taking to skiing better than I did.”

If she'd just met Jack, if the first time she'd ever met him was when she'd sat down at this table, she would have a much different opinion of him.

She also wouldn't have been able to give meaning to the shadows in his eyes, darker than his irises, more than skin-deep. Why was it that she could see into this man's heart? Behind the rugged man-in-charge demeanor was an honest guy, who wanted to do the right thing, who loved with all he had, who intended to fight for his daughter to get her in a good place.

“It's not my business,” she cleared her throat, surprised at how thick and honest her voice sounded. Somehow he'd disarmed her controlled outer layer of defense. “Marin mentioned you were a single parent. It can't be easy for a dad to raise a teenage daughter.”

“Not easy at all.” Emotion flashed through his dark eyes and he turned away to stare out the long wall of windows where the veil of falling snow had thickened. “Heidi's been gone for three years.”

“That had to have been devastating for both of you.”

A single nod. He continued to stare out the window, stoic as chiseled granite. She felt the heavy weight of his sorrow. Was that why she felt an uncommon connection with Jack? They were two people who'd known loss and defeat? Maybe that's all this was, nothing romantic, nothing like destiny.

In a way, it was a relief to realize this. There was
nothing to deny. Nothing to worry about. They were simply two people who'd walked a similar path in life. “I was ten when my mom left. She took our youngest sister and just walked out the door one day. It was summer, and she'd just pinned up the wash to dry on the backyard clothesline.”

“Did she and your sister ever come back?”

Katherine stared out into the endlessly falling snow. “I can still see the load of T-shirts snapping in the breeze and smell the laundry-soap scent of them. Mom backed the family car out of the detached garage and took off down the alley. I saw glimpses of the car through the bowed heads of the sunflowers that lined the back corner of the fence, and then she was gone forever.”

“That couldn't have been easy.” Jack scrubbed a hand over his face. The burden of worry and responsibility he carried felt close to the surface. Maybe too close. “Your story gives me hope for my daughter. You went through losing your mom, too, and look how incredible you turned out. Hayden will, too.”

“Wait one minute. I'm so far away from incredible that I can't believe you said that.”

How perfect was Katherine? Not only was she wonderful but modest, too. “I'm not gonna argue with you about it. Learn to take a compliment.”

“All right, but be sincere next time, instead of trying to be charming.”

So, she thought he was charming? Talk about a good surprise. “Next time, huh? You mean there's a chance I might run into you somewhere sometime and you won't try to avoid me?”

“It does depend on how this turns out
and
how easy you are to avoid.”

He took swig from his cup, and the tea tasted better, sweeter. He couldn't say why. He had to admit that she'd made a dent in his defenses. Again. “How did you get past losing your mom?”

“I don't think I ever have.”

He studied Katherine. She was still staring at the window, but she didn't seem to be seeing what was beyond the glass, or the thick snow falling ever harder.

“I think everyone has wounds in their lives. It's not so much that you erase that wound from your heart, as much as you learn to move past the pain. To live and learn to trust others even with that old wound.” Katherine pivoted to assess him with those lovely unguarded eyes. It was easy to see beyond the calm controlled manner she showed the world to the real woman she kept private.

He liked
this
Katherine. “So, if you never got over it, will Hayden?”

“No.”

Katherine's heart twisted tightly, protectively against the painful shards of the past brought to the surface. Also from Jack's wince of hope lost. He looked down at his capable hands, loosely fisted on the table, a strong towering man who looked defeated. She knew it wasn't the answer he had wanted to hear.

But it was the truth.

Why did she feel so much for him? She could tell herself she didn't like this guy, but it wouldn't be the truth. If she was one hundred percent honest, then she
had to admit she did like him. There was no sense denying it. How could she not care for this man, the one beneath the mask of commander and protector? He radiated earnestness and integrity, and it touched her, for he had a heart to match.

Maybe she liked this Jack best of all.

“I'm out of my depth with Hayden, I'll admit to it. Just when I think I've got this parenting thing figured out, she goes and ups the ante on me.”

“Plus, she's got you wrapped around her little finger.”

“You're right about that.” He shrugged, a gesture of defeat. “It's not a good thing, I know. I just can't help it.”

“A teenager is an awesome responsibility. As much as you love your daughter, which is always a good thing, there's so much you can't protect her from. You would do anything to keep her safe.”

He nodded once, staring out the window and not seeing anything at all. “Then what do I do? I can't accept the direction she's heading in. I won't let it happen. Somehow, I gotta get her through this. I'm at a loss. She was in counseling for a while and I thought she was doing better. Looking forward in her life, not back.”

“That's a tall order for any of us. It takes a lot of time to get to those roots of pain. They can go deeper than you think.”

“Speaking from experience?”

“It's the same road we're all on, right?” She tilted her head to the side, gazing up at him through her long, natural lashes. All honesty and compassion. “Life is a tough path to walk, and kids aren't immune to the struggles of it, no matter how a parent tries to shelter them.”

“That's what I've worked hard for. To insulate her from anything that could hurt her. And when her mother died, there was no way to shield her from that. In trying to, maybe I got it all wrong. Maybe I've done more harm than good.”

“I don't believe that for a minute.”

As if her belief in him was the key to a lock within him, he felt a door give way and the truth tumble out. He was a man who prided himself on his strength and discipline. He was a do-the-right-thing kind of man, but as hard as he'd tried, with all the good intentions, still there were shattered pieces, like failure, tumbled, broken at his feet. “I've made mistakes.”

“Who hasn't?” Her understanding made him feel less alone. Less confused. “After my mom left, Dad had such a hard time. We all did. Our world, as we knew it, had ended, and it was never the same again. But my dad, he held it together. He held us together.”