Precious Blessings (Love Inspired) (8 page)

“Is that what you do with your life, all the good you can?” He stood, towering over her desk, and made the nerves in her stomach worse.

She couldn't answer. Oxygen caught in her throat
and refused to move. She felt her heart lurch, like a bird taking flight, and how silly was that?

“My Hayden is yours weekdays, except for youth group activities. You still have my home number?”

Somehow, she managed to nod.

“Then if she gives you any trouble—any at all—tell me and I'll take care of it. You deserve good things, Katherine. You're quite a lady.”

Her jaw dropped. Every neuron in her brain misfired. She sat paralyzed in her chair as he left, closing the door behind him with a click.

She didn't know what to think.

 

You're quite a lady.
Hours later, on his late-night dinner break, Jack still couldn't believe he'd said that. There's nothing like tipping your hand, buddy, and he'd probably made a big fool of himself. Wait, there was no probably about it. He knew he'd been a complete buffoon because she'd sat there in shock. Probably in horror. Speechless at hearing how he thought she was
quite a lady.

Smooth, Jack. Real smooth. It was no wonder he was destined to be unmarried for the rest of his natural life. God was probably taking pity on nice women like Katherine and doing everything He could to keep them safe from non-suave men like him. Lord knows he hadn't been the best husband. He'd let his wife down.

“More hot water?” The waitress stopped with a hot water carafe and refilled the teapot on his table. “Would you like anything else? We've got a real nice apple pie tonight.”

“Sure. Why not?” He unwrapped another tea bag and dunked it into the pot to steep.

Somehow he had to get his mind off Katherine. It wasn't going to be easy. So he flipped open his phone and dialed home, just to check on Hayden before her bedtime. But when Mrs. Garcia answered, she said that Hayden had gone to bed early. Maybe that was a good sign, he reasoned as he pocketed his phone. She'd put in a long day between the new school and working at the bookstore, and she'd been tired.

Thank God.
He bowed his head and asked the Lord to help guide him, to keep leading him in the right direction. He prayed these changes for Hayden were the right ones.

When he unfolded his hands, the waitress was coming his way with a big triangle of pie. He couldn't say why he felt so alone as he grabbed a fork and dug in. Truth was, he couldn't remember feeling lonelier. It was a down-deep, all-encompassing lonesomeness. You'd think he'd be used to it by now.

But he didn't like it. Not one bit.

When he thought of Katherine, it just got worse. What was he gonna do about that?

 

In the loneliness of her dining room, Katherine turned the page in her gardening book and stabbed another chunk of warmed-up Chinese food with her fork. The noodle chow mein was tricky and the second she opened her mouth, the food tumbled off the fork and onto her napkin.

This is what she got from reading and eating at the
same time. She crumpled the food-splotched napkin and tossed it onto the table, reached for a fresh napkin from the holder she kept handy and went back to her reading. Wiser this time, she skipped the noodles and stabbed a chunk of chicken. When she lifted that to her mouth, it fell off, too.

She had the irrational urge to blame Jack Munroe for it. She'd been off ever since he'd made that comment in her office. Now she couldn't stop wondering. Did Jack like her?

No, of course he didn't. Whatever was going on was a one-sided thing, right? She sort of, kind of,
maybe,
just a little, was starting to like him.

Okay, it wasn't just a little, it was a lot. Not that anything would come of it, of course.

She went back to her book but the words didn't make sense. It might as well be written in Greek for all she was understanding about how to grow new rose plants from cuttings. Forget it. She snapped the book shut. She'd worry about that later.

As for Jack, she'd do best to get her feelings for him under control. She liked him, but that's all there was to it. She had to be sensible. If he was interested in her, he would have let her know by now.

Besides, it had to be impossible. His beloved daughter hated her. She hardly knew anything about Jack, not really, not enough to predict how he would be as a boyfriend and, if it came to that, a husband. After all, a girl had to be sensible and think ahead.

And looking ahead, all she saw were big question marks. Huge question marks. Especially the biggest
one of all. If Jack knew why Kevin had called off their wedding, would Jack agree with him? Or would he understand?

She didn't know him well enough to know either way.

Stop thinking about him, Katherine. You've given it up to God, remember? Let it go.

The phone rang. She snagged the extension in the kitchen. The caller screen said it was Jack Munroe. She stared at his name, not completely comprehending at first.

It was Jack. Her heart seized and stopped beating entirely. So, what should she do? Did she pick it up or let it ring?

“K
atherine? It's Jack.” After so many rings, he was taken by surprise when she answered. He took a deep breath. Brace yourself for her to hang up on you, man. “Jack Munroe.”

But she didn't hang up. Her voice sounded strained. “Hi. What can I do for you?”

Was there a reason she was using her bookstore voice? Jack felt his courage begin to deflate a little. She was probably wondering how he had gotten her number. “I called your store and wound up talking to your brother. He was working late and suggested I give you a call.”

“You were wondering how it went with Hayden today?”

“Right.” That was one reason for calling, anyway. He stirred sugar into his teacup, the noises of the diner fading into silence. The only thing he could hear was the atomic-bomb caliber of his pulse booming in his
ears. He couldn't remember being this nervous. Ever. “How did she do?”

“Okay, I guess. I assigned her to Ava, to help inventory the shipments that had come in and were piling up. I thought it was best if she didn't work directly underneath me at first, anyway. She doesn't seem to like me.”

“I'm sorry about that.” Jack winced. Hayden not liking Katherine would be a huge impediment if they were to start dating.
If
Katherine might be amenable to going on a date with him. This was the mission behind his call. “I wanted to make sure she behaved herself.”

“I can honestly say she didn't hide the fact that she wasn't thrilled to be there, but she did fine. I was locked in my office with my brother going over the month-end expenses, so I hardly poked my head out of the door. But Ava had no complaints and, believe me, if she'd had any, I would have heard them.
You
would have heard them.”

“That's a relief.” That was the understatement of the century. He felt as if a lot was riding on this; that proved how much he liked Katherine—and hadn't yet admitted it to himself. Although his
you're quite a lady
comment ought to have been a blazing clue. “You sure she didn't stage a coup d'état? I told her to be respectful.”

“No military takeovers, but there's always tomorrow.”

He could feel Katherine's smile across the line. He liked that. “It's too early to say, but one day down without doom is a good sign.”

“Any step in a positive direction is a good one.”
Katherine cringed. Had she really said something so lame? Yes. Probably, if she could get past being nervous, she could think of something more interesting to say. Too bad she couldn't think of anything. Too bad she was trembling. She took a deep breath, hoping Jack would say something and rescue her. Silence stretched across the line. Say something, Jack.

He did. “So, how are things going with you?”

“Fine.”

More silence stretched painfully between them. She could picture Jack on the other end grimacing,
so
wishing he hadn't called her.

See, this is where being a cool, in-control, confident woman of the world would come in handy. Too bad she was just sensible Katherine.
This
is why dating was so painful. She was definitely saying no to Danielle's blind-date guy. “Things are fine, other than my brother is stressing over the budget. My sisters are over-involved in my life and are trying to find me men to marry, but that's nothing unusual.”

Why
did she say that? That was way too personal. Now she was just talking out of sheer nervousness. Why was it getting worse? Her knees weakened and she had to sit down. The only consolation she had was Jack would probably hang up and be glad.

Instead, he chuckled. “Who are they trying to marry you off to?”

“A few weeks ago it was the copier repairman. Who, I suspect, sabotaged the copier he was doing maintenance on after Ava hinted that I would be at the church's over-thirties singles night and maybe he should come, too.”

“Wait a minute. You think he broke the copier on purpose, so he'd have a reason to come back and see you?”

“Considering he'd just packed his toolbox out the door when I went to make a bunch of copies and the machine sat there as dead as a doorknob. He'd conveniently left his business card on the table with a note on the back that said, ‘no service charge for your next call.' Ava took it as a sign.”

“Do you like this copier guy?”

“I've skipped the last two singles meetings at church just in case he's there.”

“When's the next meeting?”

“Tomorrow night at seven. Marin hosts it, and I'm afraid she's going to highjack me and drag me to the next one. I can only hope the repair guy isn't there.”

“And the copier?”

“Still broken. Until Spence notices, and then he's going to call to get it repaired. I'm praying, and I'm making my sisters pray, too, that he doesn't notice. You're laughing.”

“Guilty.” Jack chugged down the last swallows of tea. The noise of the restaurant and the hustle and bustle around him remained in the distant background next to Katherine's voice, her…
everything.

“You think I'm a coward, don't you? I know, there are days I wish I had more bravado.”

“You're just too nice to let anyone down. Or to say no if it would hurt their feelings. Right? So, what about the other guy?”

“What other guy?”

“The one your sisters are trying to fix you up with now?”

Okay, now her hands were starting to shake, too. An even worse situation. Jack was just making friendly conversation, right? He was probably on his dinner break, alone, wanting someone to talk to. Then why was he talking about
this?
“Oh, just some guy.”

“Are you going to avoid him like the copier repairman? Or are you looking for a lawyer or an orthodontist or a heart surgeon?”

Where had he gotten that idea? “The job isn't as important as the man. I'm looking for someone good, faithful and sincere with a sense of humor, a big heart and the right values.”

“Where do you stand on kids?”

“I like them. Either preexisting or in the future.” Why the questions? “How about you? You said you haven't dated in a while.”

“And I think you know why. Whatever I do, it's gotta be best for Hayden.” Jack paused and silence settled into the line again, tense between them. “I'd like to start dating. Maybe there's a woman out there somewhere who wouldn't run from me during the course of a meal. Someone who would think I'm genuinely funny. Pretty unlikely, I know.”

“You have to be exaggerating. I can't imagine your dates dashing off before the entree is served.”

“It's happened three times. I don't count the fourth time because the woman excused herself to the restroom before the waiter could take our order. I never saw her again.”

“That's terrible.”

“It didn't do much for my ego. The hostess informed me later that she'd taken a cab. I sat waiting for her to come back for twenty-five minutes. Talk about a disaster. Do you ever wish you could hop into a good relationship, like a year into it, without enduring all those first few dates? Just avoid it completely?”

“Every day.” For one breathless moment, Katherine's pulse jolted to a stop.

Was Jack trying to ask her out on a date? No, he couldn't be. His daughter despised her. But, if he wasn't, then this conversation didn't make a lot of sense. Unless it wasn't
her
he was interested in. Disappointment slid like ice into her heart. “You want me to fix you up with someone, don't you?”

“Not at all. I'm just curious how another single adult feels about the whole dating thing. Are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Going to let your sisters set you up?”

So he hadn't called because he was interested in her. She swallowed down the disappointment and tried to keep it out of her voice. “I'm considering it.”

“Maybe we should make a deal. You go out on a date. I go out on a date. It would sure help me to start risking my dignity with all those inevitable first-date disasters, knowing that you were risking it, too. What do ya say?”

What she really disliked was that he was right about her. She had a hard time saying no, if it would hurt someone's feelings. And then she was in a pickle, because she didn't go back on her word, either. Spence
said she was a softy, and she was. She cared. About Jack. About him finding some nice women who would value him. She cared about Hayden getting the right stepmother to improve her life.

It's already been established that can't be me. Holding herself very still, she said the only thing she honestly could. “If it would help you, Jack. Sure.”

“Great.” He sounded happy. Really happy.

And that's what she wanted. Even if her heart hurt so much, it seemed to stop beating. And the funny part was that she hadn't even realized how much she liked Jack. Until this moment.

“I gotta go, my hour's up and it's back to work.” His smile radiated over the phone. “Thanks for the talk. I'll call you.”

“Sure.” It was the only word she could manage. She disconnected the line and stared down at her hands. She couldn't believe it. They were still shaking. It wasn't as if she had anything to be nervous about. Not now.

So, he wasn't interested in her, and it hurt. But that was that.

 

Let it rain. Jack didn't mind the cold, wet, nearly freezing temperatures. Not a bit. He settled into his cruiser, cranked over the engine and punched the defroster on high. His windshield was pure fog, so while he waited for the glass to clear he called Jonas.

“Yo, Jack. What's up?”

“I've thought it over and I'll do it. I'll go on that date. But one condition.”

“There's always something. What?”

“Please. Don't tell Katherine my name or what I do. Not yet. I want it to be a surprise.”

“Katherine hasn't put two and two together.”

“Just make sure she doesn't, okay? I don't want to blow this. I want to do it right. I'll let her know, but I want to do it my way.”

“You got it.”

He disconnected, feeling hopeful. More hopeful than he'd felt in a long time. In years. In so long, that it felt like a century.

Hayden wasn't going to like this, but he felt that she'd come around in time. He couldn't think of a better role model for his daughter than Katherine. She was perfect. Just thinking about her filled his heart right up. He felt as if he'd closed his eyes and dreamed her up. She was honest and upright, faithful and good, kind and as likeable as could be. She was beautiful. He adored everything about her. Even her tendency to be super-organized.

She was too special. He wanted her in his life. More than he'd ever wanted anything for himself. With all he was and with all he had. He didn't want to think how he'd feel if this didn't work out.

All he could do was his best, and he'd trust God with the rest.

 

In the cold gray dawn, March was roaring like a lion, so when Katherine lowered her car window to place an order at the espresso stand, she got a face full of wind-driven ice, sleet and rain.

Great. After ordering a cinnamon mocha, she looked
at herself in the visor mirror. Yikes. Talk about wind damage.
Bedraggled
wasn't the word. It couldn't be good that it was seven in the morning, and already the day wasn't going well.

It will get better, right, Lord?
She wasn't feeling too hopeful as she dug a five from her wallet. She hadn't slept well last night, high winds had woken her up and kept her awake, but the storm wasn't the only reason.

Jack. She couldn't explain why learning he wasn't interested in dating her felt like a loss, something beyond disappointment. She'd given it to God, and this was God's answer. This is how things were meant to be.

Let it go, Katherine. She took a steadying breath. Her coffee was ready, so she powered down her window, handed over the five and her punch card in exchange for the toasted bagel and the enormous cup of blistering-hot espresso. Whipped cream oozed out of the lid's drinking spout.

Excellent. She thanked the lady and left her change in the tip jar. She slid the car into gear and froze. There was a black SUV just like Jack's pulling into the lot directly toward her, aimed at the order window on the other side of the booth.

That can't be him, she told herself, so don't even look. Even if it was, she didn't know if she wanted to see him, so she kept her eyes on the road. Heart stinging, she didn't look in her rearview mirror until she'd pulled back into traffic and was heading in the direction of the store. She could see a man, window down, giving his order with a smile. Jack's face. Jack's smile.

The stinging in her heart worsened, so she kept driving through the wind and the storm, sad. Feeling so very sad.

Not quite able to let it go.

 

Jack felt a brush, like a whisper, that moved sweetly through him. He'd felt this before—when he was near Katherine. He looked around and only saw torrential downpour and cars he didn't recognize. Then he realized he didn't even know what she drove.

After getting hot tea for himself and a vanilla steamer for Hayden, he drove her to school, wished her a good day and felt her unhappiness to the bottom of his soul. He watched her walk away, taking more of his heart with her. Dressed in her school uniform, navy sweater and slacks, saddle shoes, she looked like the good, wholesome girl she was inside. This was his daughter. He loved her so much.

Watch over her, Lord. Please keep her safe today.

He stayed until she'd passed through the double doors into the school. Only then could he move on, negotiating the jam of traffic. He checked the time. He had a meeting with Pastor Marin for counseling. This head stuff wasn't his thing and he wasn't comfortable with it, but he needed help. Marin had suggested Hayden was going through the stages of grief, which everyone did after a loss.