Pretty Bitches (32 page)

I cradled his head and stroked his neck. “I love you Cailen but you can’t do that shit to me again. You have to let me in and trust me.”

He nodded. “I know, love and I promise I will.”

He stood up and placed a kiss to my lips. When he pulled back his expression morphed into utter pain when he saw the dried blood on my breast and stomach. He led me over to the tub and sat me down.

“Wait right here, please, I’m going to get some antiseptic and a gauze.”

He raced out from the room and came back minutes later with a first aid kit. He nervously fidgeted with the packaging and I saw how his hands shook as he pulled the ointment out and readied the gauze.

When he placed the q-tip on my nipple I sucked in a breath and jerked. It was so sensitive that I wasn’t sure I could stand anything touching it. He tried again and I nearly fell back in the tub trying to get away.

I saw his lips turn down and his eyes furrow with worry as he continued to clean the blood off my skin. When he finished he looked at me with a broken expression.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered.

“I know. Its ok.” I stared at my hands for a minute thinking of the words. “I need to know everything Cailen. Everything about you. We are never going to work if I keep finding things out this way. We can’t continue to hurt one another. It’s just not fair.”

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and nodded as he exhaled slowly. “I agree and I’m sorry I’ve handled things so piss poor. This is all new to me.” He gestured to us. “I’ve kept inside myself my whole life. From the moment I realized that my mother abandoned me it’s been nothing but rage against the world and everything in it I broke that day and no one has ever been able to put it back together, until you. You touched me from the inside out from the first time I laid eyes on you. It was fate because it was instant. I knew I’d never felt anything like it and I didn’t even know your name or anything about you it just clicked inside me and pulled me to you like a magnet.” He lowered his eyes to the floor and wrenched his hands for several minutes then raked them through his hair before he continued.

“I was a black soul when I met Graham but the time that I spent by his side it was worse. I did things that I am not proud of. I hurt people for money and it felt good when I did it. It calmed the rage that held me hostage. Once they saw the potential in me and how effective I was they began sending me to deliver “messages”. I did that for several years until I was like a robot. There was no human spirit left, no regard for life. Then I met Alick and he broke through then Lorne helped me put my life back together. I’d bounced around living with pure evil since I was five that I never knew a normal life. One where you were guaranteed a meal everyday and clothes on your back with a roof over your head. There were more times than not that I slept outside, ate from leftovers outside restaurants and stole clothes from department stores. Living on the street you have to learn to take are of yourself and I learned early fighting was my only survival. But Lorne provided me with stability and guidance. I’ve healed from that demon of a man long ago but today I was scared to death because he came back when your boss hurt you. Then I hurt you and…” He trailed off and his voice broke.

I gripped his hand wanting to reassure him. I never knew his life had been that bad and the thought made me cringe. I wanted him to know that I belonged to him and that he belonged to me. We were going to get through the rest of our tangled unpredictable lives, together.

“Your past is just that, Cailen, your past. Those things cannot be changed but what we do in the future can. From this point on. But we have to have faith in the other. When you are at your darkest and you’re scared you have to let me be the light. You have to trust me enough to know when to throw you that lifeline.” I peered into his eyes making my profession sink in.

I saw nothing but gratitude staring back at me when he gently pulled me into him and very quietly let that feeling take over. We stayed there for a long time just breathing against each other.

Then he pulled back and linked our hands leading me to the bedroom. I opened the drawer and pulled out a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt. I dressed cautiously because my breast was throbbing with pain. He disappeared and came back with two glasses and my decanter.

I smiled while he poured the glasses and handed me one on the bed. We sat there, our hands clasped tight drinking and not a word was spoken. I guessed each of us was processing the day’s events. My heart swelled when I thought about how much it took for him to open up and tell me about that tortured past. It occurred to me that today he gave me his all—everything.

CHAPTER 10:
GOODBYE

Cailen had
gone with me to my office to retrieve my things. Phil had sent down a glowing letter of recommendation and had made it known that my job was taken care of and there was no need for me to train a replacement.

Whatever Cailen had said to him had scared the living shit out of him. I never asked because I just didn’t want to know. After a week of packing up and shipping my things we locked up the house. I gave both Marriett and Elliott a severance that included a year’s salary with a twenty percent raise. The shocked looks and smiles were enough payment for me. It made me happy. And it made Cailen happy too.

He sighed with contentment when we pulled to the jet hangar and loaded on board. I was able to get my nipple ring back in but she was out of commission for a wile. Only a bra was allowed to touch her and Cailen never said a word, he knew better.

The flight was smooth and just when we were about to touch down I looked over, a question weighing on my mind. “What are we going to do about Graham?”

He kept his expression clean but I could see the tightness in his eyes. Several moments passed before he answered, “I don’t know. I’ve been going over it in my mind trying to think of a logical solution but I know nothing will work. Once I get you settled and we get back from Prague I’ll go see him.”

“What? I don’t want you within a hundred miles of him, Cailen.” My voice shot up an octave with pure panic.

“It’s ok, love. I’m not afraid of him in the least and I am the only one that knows how to handle him. I’m not going to allow him to get near you, Emberly. No fucking way. This has to stop now.” He vowed with utter resolve.

I stared at him trying to think of something to say, something to change his mind but I was empty. I had nothing. Just then the plane came to a stop and he stood reaching for my hand, smiling. I gripped it and followed him down the stairs and to the car.

The ride home was quiet but he pulled me in for a kiss several times and traced the rings on my finger the entire way home. The tent and all the decorations were gone when we pulled in front. My face fell slightly missing the beauty and that day.

He read my thoughts. “Gemma, don’t worry, love I’ve captured every moment out there on film and if that isn’t enough I will put every bit of it back up exactly the same if that’s what you wish.” He said with a wicked grin.

I just smiled and followed him out of the car. He pulled his keys from his pocket and before he could twist them in the lock the door flew open and Lila stood there with a champagne glass in one hand and Alick in the other.

“It’s about fucking time you got back! We’re nearly out of alcohol and we’ve ran out of places to violate.” She snickered as she placed the flute to her mouth and gulped.

I sighed heavily. “Oh Lila. What have you done to our Alick? Tell me he’s still in there.” I said knocking on his chest.

He laughed once. “Hardly. He checked out a few days ago. I think I saw him running for the hills.” He bent in to my face and whispered. “She’s a fucking wildcat.” He winked as he pulled back to cut his eyes at her smiling.

Cailen howled. “Well hot damn! Thank for stirring that surly bastard to life, Lila. He’s been shit for years.” He laughed as he pulled me inside the house carrying our bags to our room.

I made a beeline for the bar. Grabbing the decanter and tilting the rest of the contents into a tall glass. I had a lot of issues to work through in my head Lila and Alick being a major one. I hoped to hell he knew what he was getting into. Lila is electric and she draws them in then chews them up and spits them out. Always.

“So what did
Phil
say when you broke the news?” She asked dramatically bulging her eyes.

The thought of that encounter still gave me shivers. “Well, he freaked at first but eventually gave me a glowing recommendation.” I didn’t say anything about what happened with Cailen because I felt as though that would be betraying him and I just couldn’t do that.

I noticed his frame from the corner of my eye and turned. He was stopped in the doorway with the sweetest expression on his face. It automatically pulled a smile to my lips. He strolled over to me and placed his hands on my hips whispering into my ear, “Thank you for that.”

I reached my hand back and rubbed his neck. “Oh, you can thank me later, bagpipe.”

He growled then said, “I have to warn you I’m very very thankful.”

I chuckled into his neck. The man was relentless.

A little while later Alick proposed dinner at a local favorite. I jumped because, honestly I was starved since my appetite had been sparse and I really hadn’t eaten in days. Cailen worried over my weight. He’d said on several occasions that I was looking too thin and worried that it was a product of his doing.

It wasn’t. My appetite is always the first thing to go when I am stressed out about something. During our first bout apart I’d lost about fourteen pounds, mainly because my diet consisted of the liquid variety. The fermented kind.

I shuffled off to get ready and already felt a bit better knowing I had more of my stuff here and I could feel at home.

The shower was soothing and the after prep was invigorating. I oiled every surface of my body in coconut oil and buffed bronzer to finish.

My red locks were lightening due to the warmer climate and sunnier days. During the summer months my hair can take on a strawberry blonde hue.

I grabbed a pair of sky-high red suede booties and matched them with an uber short Japanese print silk skirt and threw on a tuxedo jacket rolled up to the elbows.

I walked to the kitchen and heard hushed voices. I continued in and found Cailen and Alick head to head at the window. Alick noticed me and gave a nod to Cailen who turned in my direction and smiled when he saw me.

I rolled my eyes and walked directly over to the bar, irritation flickering through my body. He wound an arm around my waist and turned me around. “I know what you are thinking, love and I promise you I am not hiding anything from you. I’ll fill you in on everything I was just letting Alick know a few things and was trying to keep quiet without letting Lila in on my secret.”

I let out a breath appreciating his honesty. “Ok.
That
I understand.”

He stroked my hair back and then bent his head down to take in my appearance. “Fuck you are beautiful. I’m going to have to beat them off of you with a stick.” He murmured into my neck as he bathed my skin.

My eyes rolled back in my head.

“I’ll let you borrow the one I was going to spank you with later.” I said breathlessly as he diminished my control.

Lila sauntered in clearing her throat to gain our attention. I realized we were curled around each other in a very provocative way.

I pulled back just a little and stared at her smiling. Then I realized what she was wearing. A beautiful fitted linen dress belted at the waist with a large mahogany leather belt and matching pumps. She was stunningly simple and classic chic. Nothing like her normal wear, which is usually in your face sexy. She looked demure and beautiful. Even her makeup was classic and simple featuring her natural beauty. I had to do two takes to make sure it was really her.

Alick scanned her body once but trained his gaze on her eyes. She walked directly to his side and instead of an embarrassing display of overtly sexual mannerisms, like usual, she coolly stepped to his side linking their fingers and smiled widely when he placed a kiss to her cheek.