“Naan. Curry. It’s our first meal,” he said, guiding me to the blanket he’d thrown on the ground. “I can’t cook and I didn’t want to try to pretend that I could fix what I’d already ruined, so I thought I’d try a different way.”
“It’s lovely.” I sank down next to him and when he fed me bits and pieces, I ate them willingly. He was trying so hard to make things right.
“Tell me about the interview,” he said after a few minutes of silence.
I flicked him a look, shrugging. My previous excitement was gone. “You heard what I said to Cody.”
He wrapped his hand around mine. “Gabriella, please. Talk to me.”
The way he watched me brought an ache to my chest, but it wasn’t the one I was used to. This didn’t feel like a love that was going to swell up and overtake me. I felt like I was drowning.
You’re just stressed over the wedding,
I told myself. Forcing a smile, I started to talk.
I told him how I’d met Benny Stern, how I’d found out about the open call. Then I told him about the projects I’d been working on. The knots inside my chest didn’t untangle, although a few of them eased when I managed to elicit a laugh from him as I described one of my more colorful characters.
“How long does it take to complete one of these projects?” he asked as he poured me a glass of wine.
“It depends on the project. Some come like wildfire. Others, it’s like I’m pulling teeth.”
“I’d go with the ones that are wildfire. They sound more fun.”
He got up to start a fire. It was hot outside, but the air was blowing high enough to make the house chilly. I supposed that’s what came from having excess money. The ability to have a fire going in August just for the mood, while the air conditioner was running to keep things cool.
“They can all be fun. It’s just…some things don’t come as easy as others. It doesn’t mean they aren’t worth it.”
“I understand that very well.” Edward’s eyes met mine.
I wasn’t able to look at him long before I averted my gaze. Reaching out, I grabbed the wine bottle and splashed the rest of it into my glass. Between the alcohol, my full belly and the heat from the fire, I was a little more relaxed, but the warm, comfortable happiness I’d felt so often with Edward seemed to be missing.
Some things are worth fighting for, yeah, but sometimes, you’re just fighting. I didn’t know which of those two I was at, and the knowledge of that left me cold.
I’d emptied the better part of a bottle of wine when he turned to me, his mouth seeking. This, at least, was easy. He knew my body well and I knew his. When he guided me back to the floor, I went easily, willingly, even, almost desperate to find that connection between us again. If we could find it here, I had hope we could find it anywhere.
He came down over me, one hand curving to my waist, the other rising up to push into my hair. His touch was gentle, but I didn’t want gentle.
I dug my hand into his hair, dragging his head down to meet mine. His breath caught when I bit his lower lip and then it turned into a frantic, heavy pant as I slid my free hand between us and began to stroke him through his pants. Blue eyes held mine as I dragged his zipper down and shoved my hand inside. He groaned when I wrapped my hand around his cock and I smiled against his mouth. He was heavy and hard. Moisture seeped from the head as I circled it with my thumb.
A noise rumbled out of his throat and he began to pump into my hand. I squeezed him tighter and stroked up and down. My core ached. He rested a hand on my inner thigh, his fingers seeking. I needed more, needed to have him come inside me and fill the emptiness that grew with every second.
When he began to kiss his way down my torso with light feathery kisses, I twisted out from under him and urged him onto his back.
We were still dressed. His pants were open, underwear shoved out of the way so that his cock jutted up from the swath of cotton. I still wore the dress and my panties. And I didn’t care.
“Now,” I demanded.
Edward’s hands steadied my hips as I straddled him.
He helped me move aside my clothes, staring up at me with hunger in his eyes. I wrapped my hand around his cock and held him steady as I took him inside. I wasn’t wet enough, not yet, but it didn’t matter. The friction between his cock and my stretching pussy added to the desperation and I threw back my head, crying out as I felt the edge I craved.
He arched up, meeting each downward move of my hips with an upward thrust of his own. He pulled down the top of my dress, bringing my bra with it. Warm hands cupped my breasts and he stroked his thumbs around my nipples in slow, teasing circles. I covered his hands and urged him to squeeze, tried to communicate the need I had for something more.
Wetter now, I rode him, falling forward to brace my weight on my hands. His stomach tensed beneath my palms. Through a veil of my hair, I saw his head fall back, his eyes close. His back arched and he began to move, driving into me quicker, harder, each stroke sending sparks dancing through me.
“Yes,” I whimpered. “Like that.”
I didn’t know if he finally heard the need in my voice or if he was just giving in to his own, but either way, he flipped me onto my back and took me, driving into me with deep powerful thrusts. My back burned across the carpet as he pounded into me. I cried out and he swelled and the head of his cock stroked that spot inside me.
My eyes closed as we raced towards the precipice together. He groaned out my name, his face pressed against my shoulder. I lifted up, setting my heels firmly onto the floor so I could grind my clit against him. He swore and I squeezed my eyes tighter, continuing to move.
Involuntarily, a face swam before my eyes and in that moment, I hated myself.
I came hard, biting my lip to keep from crying out.
I didn’t know whose name I would’ve said.
Chapter 12
“I promise, Mom.” Phone in hand, I paused on the steps as I looked up at the old building where I’d lived with Kendra. I didn’t push the buzzer yet, mostly because I couldn’t. My hands were full of bags and the phone. As much time as I’d spent on the phone recently, I was starting to wish I’d invested in a bluetooth. “Kendra and I have everything under control, I swear.”
“Okay. I just…” On the other end of the phone, my mother sniffed. “Well, I always imagined being there and helping with everything for all my girls when it came to their big day.”
I understood where she was coming from. She and Suzanne had started planning her wedding three months after Suzanne had met Pierce. Mom had even helped Duncan’s wife, Allison, and her mother. I had no doubt she’d be doing as much as possible for Jackson and Amber. That was just how she was.
“You all have been a bigger help than you know, Mom.” My shoulder screamed in protest at the weight of the bags and I said, “Mom, I’m at Kendra’s now and these bags are killing me. I gotta go.”
“Okay. Send me pictures!”
I promised I would and disconnected, shoving the phone into my pocket so I could hit the buzzer.
A moment later, Kendra’s cheerful voice came through. “Hello!”
“Open up,” I pleaded. “Better yet, come and help me.”
She laughed and the door unlocked.
I wasn’t even to the first step when she appeared on the landing, jogging down to take two of the bags I’d looped over my elbow. “Girl, why didn’t you have your driver help you?”
“I took a cab.” Making a face at her, I readjusted the weight of the other bags and sighed. “I had to make a couple of last minute stops and I didn’t want to risk Paul not being available if Edward needs him.”
I had to take a minute to acclimate when we went inside. “Wow.” The whole place had been painted, the walls a clean, fresh white, the old furniture replaced by a couch the color of a tropical ocean. It matched the rest of the accents and picked up the color in the rug that covered a huge part of the floor. The murphy bed had been replaced by a lovely real bed and there were shelving units that went perfectly with the color scheme, holding books and movies and pictures. There was also one giant TV.
“Damn, Kendra. If I’d known you were making this kind of money, maybe I would’ve stuck around.”
She grinned at me. “The landlord had to pony up for the paint job. I told him I could either press charges for the shit he tried to pull on us, or he could take care of some much needed upkeep around here. Once the painting was done, I decided I needed to update everything, and I’d gotten a nice advance from Bouvier, so I could afford it.”
“It looks amazing.” Dumping the bags onto the couch, I sank down onto it with a content sigh. “This is a lot more comfortable than the old one.”
“It’s a bed too. In case you ever wanna crash again.” She shrugged, her oversized shirt slipping down one bare shoulder. “For old times’ sake.”
I laughed. “If you’d made the offer with the
other
couch here, then I’d say hell no. But maybe…”
She grinned and clapped her hands. “We need to get to work.”
Did we ever.
The problem with deciding to move up a wedding the way we had—okay,
one
of the problems with moving up the wedding—meant the favors I’d ordered wouldn’t be here in time and getting something personalized on this short of notice would take a mountain of money and a miracle.
I could have asked for the mountain of money, but my independent streak shrieked at the idea. I didn’t even let myself consider the fact that Edward paying for the favors wasn’t the same as me taking money for something else. It was, after all, our wedding. Fortunately, my practical side kicked in and saved the day. I could do personal myself.
Thanks to the wonders of the internet, there were a thousand ways to make your own little favors and I’d found the sweetest idea. I also had a friend who’d taken a few days off to help me with the last minute rush. Even though we’d been having some disagreements lately, she was here now.
Today was dedicated to the little terrariums I was giving away as wedding favors. They were easy, unique and they were pretty enough people might even keep them after the wedding. I’d already made a couple of test ones, just to see how I wanted mine to look and that was the plan for Kendra and me today.
Unloading the bags, I started to explain what we were doing. I showed her the glass bulbs, the stones and watched as Kendra’s smile grew. She’d always loved doing creative stuff like this. If I’d had my choice, I would’ve made favors for all of my guests...well, if I’d only been having one wedding the way I wanted and the time to do what I wanted.
Once I had everything set up, we settled down to our grown-up version of arts and crafts. She broke out the wine and cheese a half hour in and by the time we were done hours later, we’d gone through two bottles of wine and my head was spinning, but it was a good kind of spinning for once.
“They look…” Kendra hiccupped. “They look like little fairy houses.”
“Yeah.” Laying on my back, I studied the last and final terrarium. “Ain’t they sweet?”
Kendra giggled. “Your southern side is showing, girl.
Ain’t they sweet
?” She mimicked.
“Oh, shut up.” I threw a pillow at her and missed by a mile. It made us both laugh and when the sound of it had faded from the air, I murmured, “I’ve missed this.”
“So have I.” Kendra stretched out next to me, studying her terrarium. “You wanna crash here tonight?”
Rolling my head on the floor, I studied her face. Just the thought of it had something inside me relaxing and I nodded. “Yeah. Yeah I do. We can order pizza. Stay up late and be stupid.”
“We’re already a third of the way there,” she said cheerily.
Snorting, I put the terrarium down and then rolled over, staying on my hands and knees a few seconds to make sure my head wasn’t going to roll off. “Need to get that pizza,” I announced. I also needed to make sure I had plenty of water and some aspirin nearby. The last thing I needed tomorrow morning was to be hungover.
***
The dregs of a pizza littered the coffee table. A dozen bottles of nail polish added a little bit of color. Kendra and I had given each other manicures and we were wrapping up the pedicures.
I had a pale, frosty pink on my fingernails and the same color graced my toes as well. Kendra had gone with a metallic golden sheen that would complement the dress she was wearing on Saturday.
“I love the gel stuff,” she said, studying her hand. “It’s amazing.”
I nodded in agreement. I was going to cancel my appointment for tomorrow. As much as I loved getting a manicure and pedicure, Kendra and I did them pretty well ourselves and that would free up more time to spend with my family. The frosty pink on my nails was topped with a sparkly overcoat. It was soft, sweet and subtle. I loved it.
The color also matched the lingerie I’d selected to wear under my new wedding dress. It was a lovely cocktail dress, a soft ivory that glowed against my skin and made the most of my curves. I wasn’t going to be as dolled up as I would be in October for the formal event Edward still wanted, but I’d still look amazing. Best of all, I’d look like me.
“Think we’d have time to give your sisters a mani and pedi with these colors?” Kendra asked, waggling her nails at me. “We could all match.”