Purgatorium (61 page)

I look at her. There is broken glass on the floor beside her. I look down and see my reflection in it. It moves its mouth and I hear its words in my head. “Michael must not think that you know what your token is,” it whispers. “Keep your mind empty.”

I lie there, paralyzed—blocking my mind of everything.

Michael
says, holding the pistol to her face, “You have been a thorn in my side ever since you arrived here. You have been gettin’ in good with our boy here. Gaining his trust just so you can stab him in the back when the time comes. Isn’t that right?”

Michael
looks to me. “You still think she is on your side, don’t ya?” he says, glancing back at Stephanie. “How sweet is that?!” Turning back to me, he says, “How all of us have been misled this evening.”

20 Minutes

Michael
walks around her, like a wolf about to attack his prey. “Tell him the three orders of purification, deary. Or would you like my blackjack to do all the talking?”

He holds up his beating stick. The bottom of the handle is lassoed around his wrist, allowing him to twirl the baton around and around, intimidating us.

Stephanie speaks, “The first step is knowledge of one’s sins—regenerating the mind.”

“I see you got that figured out, or do you still think I’m an angel? I kid.” Michael laughs, then continues, “Though, knowing is only half the battle. You must kill the one who started this ridiculous lie, the party planner himself or herself. The demon that got this whole thing started. Have you figured out who it could be? I’d be honored if you thought it was me, but sadly you’d be mistaken. I can give you a hint.” He points to Stephanie. “This filthy lost soul is working with it.”

She tries to speak, but
Michael
hits her with the blackjack across the head. She falls, skull smacking against the floor.
Michael
hands me the pistol and quickly whirls around behind me, grabbing my hand and aiming the pistol hand at her.

“Like me or don’t. Either way, she needs to talk or die.”

I look at her as she tries to speak. “Don’t! Please!!”

I see my reflection in the glass, talking and hearing it in my head. “She has been lying to us. She was going to backstab us. She played us. We should have never trusted her.”

Thinking he has convinced me, Michael lets go of my hands. I continue to hold the pistol up, aimed at Stephanie. I visualize her as the woman I slept with at the casino. Trying very hard to concentrate in the cold of the meat locker, my head spins. She is not my enemy, I think to myself. There is no proof to what Michael is saying. He is just one of my demons!

Michael tightens his grip on the blackjack and
whips me across the face, knowing what I am thinking. “You still think that I am lying? They really did do a number on ya, didn’t they? I guess that’s what happens after a reaper fries your memories for the billionth time. You get less smart about things.”

Michael
walks over to Stephanie. “It’s time you start remembering.”

She screams, “Don’t! I’m begging you! Please!”

“Remember what I said about a picture,” Michael says to me, “and how it captures a man’s true soul?”

Michael
reaches inside his pocket, takes out a stack of photos, and throws them at my face. They fall to the ground. I look at them in shock.

“Let me tell you a story,” continues Michael. “What if a demon were to creep after you one night, in your loneliest loneliness, and say…”

I have heard these words somewhere. I try to remember. I start to recall the last moments of my past self, before I was reaped. I can visualize it. I was on a rooftop, I recall. I was shivering uncontrollably, wet from the head down. There was a small fire being made. I was being carried. A necklace transfixed me, swinging back and forth before my eyes, hypnotically. I could not clearly see the man wearing it, who was carrying me. The man put me down and started talking to me.

“What if a demon were to creep after you one night, in your loneliest loneliness, and say this life which you live must be lived by you once again, innumerable times more. Every pain and joy and thought and sigh must come again to you, all in the same sequence. The eternal
hourglass
will again and again be turned, and you with it, dust to dust!”

Now I remember the face of the man. The man wearing the necklace was a person who looked just like me! He put a flask in my jacket. He went over to the fire and grabbed something. He then came over to me and untied my ropes from my hands. I saw his coin necklace hanging around his neck. I ripped it off. I heard the chain break, thinking I had at least some satisfaction of taking something away from him. But the man didn’t even grab it back as if, for some reason, he wanted me to have it. He moved my body over to the edge of the fire. After a few seconds, I stopped shivering, feeling my clothes starting to dry.

He said, “Would you throw yourself down and gnash your teeth and curse that demon?” The man with my face left a snow
globe
a few steps in front of my body. I saw the aurora borealis glowing in the sky. I saw the top half of a Celtic
hourglass
on a ledge. Snow was falling around me. I twirled the snow globe in my hand. I saw the fake snow whirl around inside it.

I suddenly heard a shrill shrieking sound in the distance. It sounded like something terrible was about to happen to me. Then the shriek got louder. I grabbed my ears, to no avail. I looked over and saw that same man standing in the elevator. Why was he wearing my face? I saw him turn into another man—Barachiel! The man who looked like me turned into
Barachiel
! Next to him in the elevator I see Stephanie, waving to me. I felt heated, enraged at what was happening. My body’s temperature joined me in my temper tantrum as it started to get warmer from the fire.

I looked over and a flood of reapers swarmed over me. One laid its hand on me and everything went black. Then I woke up, back in my room, with no memory of it.”

25 Minutes

Looking again at the photos, I see they are all of a demon in
Barachiel
’s clothes.
Barachiel
is one of my demons!
I think.

Michael interrupts my thoughts. “He was the one who started this whole gag from the beginning! When he presented the idea to us, I was hesitant at first. But hey, can’t argue with the outcome. It was a humorous idea he had though: demons posing as angels to try and get you to trust us. To make it fair, he suggested we would gamble on the outcome of the race to see which one of us would take your life. Though I knew all the time not to trust him. Greed always has a hidden agenda. Once his greedy self started taking all of us out, I knew the only way to beat him at his own game is to take his accomplice here. All he needs to do now is find the token and I can’t have that happen. Not when we are so close. Which was what again, dear?” Michael looks over at Stephanie.

I stare down at the broken glass again. My reflection says, “She knows your token! Kill her before she tells!” I lift the gun, aim it at her, and put my finger on the trigger. “She was using us! Remember, cheaters always cheat and liars always lie.”

My mind feels like it’s battling between reason and doubt. It shoots out an uncontrollable pain when I let go of the gun to bring my hands to my head.

Michael
is bent over, laughing. “That was really tough for you, wasn’t it?” he says to me. “Making a choice between life and death is a hard gamble if you don’t know the stakes.” He snatches the gun off the ground.

I bring my hands down from my head, feeling the pain slowly washing away from me.

“But let’s not try and kill her just yet. I still need something from her.” He turns to look at Stephanie. “Now, where were we? Ah yes, the restoration of the soul.” He turns back to me. “You see, your soul was split into two forms: the
hourglass
es and what we call the token. Breaking the
hourglass
es forms the door, and the token is the key to unlocking it.”

Michael moves to stand near the door, his hand on the handle. “I’ve got no problem opening this if it means I get the information I need.”

“Go ahead! The reapers can’t sense lost souls, remember?” she says to him.

“Oh, that I do remember. That’s why I see out this window here that the reapers brought their lost soul thirsty razor hounds out to play. I hear they start at the leg and work their way up. Nasty habit.”

“You lie! I haven’t once shown my face to a single reaper today,” she relays.

The door shakes as a razor is heard howling while pounding up against it.

Michael looks to her, smiling. “Sounds like you are a liar, missy.” He looks back to me and says, “Liars always be lying.”

She screams out, “If you open those doors, you might get out by your wandering mirror trick but he won’t. He can’t control it. Are you going to risk that?”

Michael looks at her and says, “Either way, it seems I won’t get what I want, it’s true. But at least I won’t be dog food. You have heard the stories, right? After the razor has its fill, it takes you down to its cage and you become its chew toy till your body gives way upstairs. Then you are banished to hell where every day is Halloween and instead of candy you get the hot poker. Maybe almost wishing you could have changed your mind in this moment to delay you of that miserable suffering. So are you really not going to tell me?” he asks.

Stephanie’s eyes go wide with fear. I can see that she can’t take it. “David!” she shouts. “The token is his name; it’s David.”

“And I thought this lost soul either didn’t know or she wasn’t going to tell me,”
Michael
sneers, kicking Stephanie’s limp, prone body.

“Either way,” he continues, “she is useless to me, but death is too good for her. She will just keep coming back, and back, and back. When does it end?”

Michael
grabs Stephanie by the arm and drags her to the door. She screams trying to hold on to anything she can. He pulls it open and throws her out into the gathered hoard of reapers. He quickly pulls the door closed again.

“Now where were we? Ah yes, the last trial. Once the token is obtained and the door is open, it will lead to the last virtuous conclusion—the transfiguration of the body, which hasn’t been explained fully. But reading the Cliffs Notes suggests that only a soul that has gained his equilibrium can walk through it, and since you are shy in that particular area, I am here to help. For a price, no less.”

I say nothing. I try to concentrate, thinking about how to get myself out of here.

Michael
continues, “We both know you’re not going to make it before the music starts to play. I mean, you can’t even make your way out of here.”

I think about how I mirrored that one time with Sealtiel and how I can do it again to get out of this situation.

“Hate to break it to you, but Sealtiel was just busting your balls. Let me ask you, did you ever look in the mirror and see a different person staring right back?”

I try to remember back to when Sealtiel told me that I mirrored my father. Though to my recollection, I never did have any proof of the matter.

“You never once learned how to mirror anything or anyone and you want to know why?”

I look away, not wanting to believe Sealtiel lied to me, but I immediately remember now that he was one of my demons. I am angry for ever putting my trust in all of them. I look back up to him, willing to accept the truth.

“It’s because you still haven’t come to the realization of what you truly believe about yourself. Everyone has just been telling you who you are or forcing you to act one way more than the other. And all you do is listen, making them make up your mind for you while still never understanding who you really are. That’s why you could never learn the mirroring trick, or find your equilibrium. It’s sad, really.” He bends his head down, walking to the door.

Wait!
I think. You can’t leave me here or we are both dead come tomorrow.

Michael keeps his eyes at the door. “What have I taught you thus far? Two bullets are better than one.”

He gives me back the already loaded pistol and an extra bullet. Michael then says, “When you do get out of here and you will, tell Barachiel when you see him, bye for me.”

30 Minutes

“I’ll be at the finish line, awaiting your return.”
Michael
transfigures himself to look like a reaper, opens the door, and walks out, shutting it behind him. I walk over to the door and look out the small window near the top.

More reapers than I have ever seen at once are drifting around throughout in the kitchen. There’s no sign of Stephanie or any razors, and
Michael
could be any one of them. I see the frozen silver cloche cover. The hourglass reflection in it is still intact.

If I don’t destroy that cloche cover when the time reads 35:00, then all of this will have been for nothing. I sit down and try to gather my thoughts. I take out the flask and see there is water still left in it, still liquid because of its proximity to my body. Maybe just enough, I think. I begin to try to transfigure myself into a reaper.