Authors: Evangeline Anderson
“Keep your fucking money,” he snarled. “I’d rather hear an explanation of why it took you so long to find out your fiancée was missing.”
James looked offended. “I was away on the other side of the world in a sequestered negotiation, not that it’s any of your business. I heard about Elise’s ordeal the moment I got back and I took pains—
great pains
—to be certain she was all right. I didn’t bother her until now because I assumed she’d be resting.”
“Resting. Right.” Merrick looked completely unconvinced.
“Who did you talk to?” Elise asked her fiancé, once again trying to save the conversation. “Was it Harry at the office? Because—”
“No, no—you know I try not to bother anyone at your work.” James shook his head. “Your father got hold of me.”
Elise felt like someone had punched her in the gut. “You mean my
stepfather
?” she asked in a strangled voice. “I…he called you?”
“I think he was trying to feel me out—to see if I was good enough for his little girl.” James winked, apparently oblivious to her distress. “Luckily, we got along famously. He’s quite a man—built his business from the ground up. You can’t blame him for being a bit protective of the heiress of the Harks empire.”
Merrick raised his eyebrows and even Olivia looked surprised. “So you’re an
heiress?”
she asked.
“No, I’m not. Not really,” Elise mumbled. “I don’t want his money—he knows that.”
Blood money,
whispered a voice in her head but she pushed it away.
“Now, darling, Charles told me all about it,” James said. “How you were a rebellious teen—never really took to him after your own father left the picture.” He cleared his throat, appearing to realize that Merrick and Olivia were still listening. “Of course, now isn’t the time to talk about it, but I think it would be nice if you two would get together. Bury the old hatchet. He was most frightfully worried about you, you know.”
“I bet he was.” Elise swallowed, trying to get hold of herself. Now wasn’t the time to go digging up the past—there was never going to be a good time for that. But though she was a coward when it came to facing the ghosts in her own personal vault of horrors, there were some things she couldn’t lie or pretend about. “James,” she said, in a stronger voice. “There’s something I have to tell you.”
“Well, of course, darling. And we’ll have a lovely chat as soon as you get home.” James looked at his vintage Cartier watch. “Which should be soon, yes? I certainly hope so. I want to see you before I have to catch my flight for Japan.”
“Well,” Elise began reluctantly. “They did say I was ready to go home but I really need to—”
“She’ll be on the next shuttle down to Earth,” Merrick interrupted her.
Elise looked up at him, shocked and hurt. She wasn’t sure how it was going to come out, but she had been determined to tell her fiancé about Merrick—about the strange new relationship that had developed between them so quickly. But now it seemed there was nothing to tell.
“Excellent!” James looked pleased. “I won’t even send a car—I’ll pick you up myself.”
“How very fucking noble of you,” Merrick growled under his breath.
“I’m sorry—I didn’t quite catch that,” James frowned.
“Nothing.” Merrick shook his head. “Elise will be down within the hour—as long as she’s cleared to go.” He looked at Olivia who nodded.
“She should be fine. I know Sylvan was doing some research into the post-stasis condition but he hasn’t found any contraindications to Elise leaving. All her vitals are good and strong and she seems to be completely healed.” She looked at Merrick. “Will you be flying her yourself?”
Elise’s heart jumped. If Merrick took her maybe she could explain—they could talk about what had happened and—
“No.” He shook his head. “Find somebody else.” He must have seen the disappointment and hurt in Elise’s eyes because he added, “My, uh, ship’s not quite ready to go yet. I’m still running the last diagnostic.”
“All right, then.” Olivia squeezed Elise’s arm. “Looks like you’re going home.”
“I guess so.” Elise tried to look happy but all she could manage was a weak, wavering smile. Instead of being thrilled that her long ordeal was over and she could go back to her handsome fiancé and normal life, she felt sick with unhappiness.
Get over it,
she told herself roughly.
What were you going to do? Give up practicing law and stay on the Mothership with a man you just met?
She glanced up at Merrick—his towering height, his scarred face and mismatched eyes and thought,
Yes. Yes, I would if I could.
But it was clear he didn’t want her. In fact, he wouldn’t even meet her eyes.
“Well, then.” James, on the viewscreen, was looking at her sharply. “I guess I’ll see you soon. Are you
quite
certain you’re all right, darling?”
“Yes,” Elise whispered and then forced herself to speak louder. “Yes, I…I’m sure.”
“Wonderful. I’ll see you within the hour.” He smiled. “I can’t wait to hold you again.”
Such a public admission of affection was huge coming from the normally reticent James. In the past it would have sent a flock of butterflies spiraling through her stomach. This time Elise felt like she’d swallowed a bar of lead. “I…I can’t wait to see you either, James,” she murmured.
He smiled again and the viewscreen went blank.
* * * * *
“Merrick? Merrick, please wait!” Elise reached for him as he was turning away. Though he hated to admit it, the touch of her soft, small hand still did things to his body. Still made him want to sweep her into his arms and hold her tight. Gritting his teeth, Merrick ignored the stupid impulse.
“What do you want?” he growled, only half turning. “I’m busy. Hell—you are, too. You gotta catch a flight back to your fiancé before you forget him again.”
“You have to believe me—I really
did
forget him. And I…I don’t want…” Her big brown eyes were swimming with tears. The hurt on her face stuck in his heart like a barb, but Merrick ignored it grimly.
“You don’t want what?” he demanded. “Don’t want to go back to your rich-ass fiancé? Don’t want to go back to your happy, successful life down on Earth?”
“I don’t want it to end this way,” she whispered. “I can’t…I was trying to tell him.”
“Tell him what? There’s nothing to tell.”
“You’re lying.” She lifted her chin and stared him in the eyes. “You felt it too—the connection between us. You told me so.”
“What if I did?” Merrick turned to face her fully. “Look at me, Elise.” He held out his hands, indicating the entire, rough and ugly package that was his hybrid self. “I’ve got nothing to offer you,” he said. “Nothing to my name but a modified star-duster and a nasty reputation. That guy on the viewscreen, he’s got money, power—he can give you what you want. What you need. Go home to him. It’s where you belong.”
“What if…what if I
don’t
belong there anymore?” she whispered. “What if I want to stay here…with you?”
Merrick’s heart fisted in his chest but he ignored it.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and I’m a fucking idiot.
“I’d say that’s too damn bad,” he growled, giving her his best blank face. “Since I’m not staying.”
“But…then where will you go?” Her brown eyes were wide with apprehension.
“Away.” Merrick made a sweeping gesture with one arm. “Anywhere away from here. And there’s only room on my ship for one.
Me.”
“Fine.” She dashed the tears from her eyes angrily and stood up straight. “If that’s the way you want to be.”
“Wanting has nothing to do with it.” Merrick laughed harshly. “It’s the way I am.”
“So…I guess this is it.” She took a deep breath. “This is goodbye. We—we’ll probably never see each other again.”
“Probably not.” Merrick shrugged, as though completely unconcerned though his insides felt frozen. “The universe is a big fucking place.”
Elise bit her lip, the anger fading from her face. “All right, I guess I can accept that. But if this is the end, can I…can I at least hug you goodbye?”
He could tell what it cost her to make the request—how it hurt her pride to beg for that one simple thing—for a last bit of comfort and contact. But his own heart was hurting too—wounded and aching, though he didn’t want to admit it, even to himself.
“Sorry,” he said shortly. “I don’t have time—gotta finish that diagnostic on my ship.” He nodded at her, keeping his face hard and his words clipped. “Have a nice life, Elise Darden.” Then he turned on his heel and walked away.
“Merrick!” It was no more than an anguished whisper but he heard it anyway. Heard it and almost turned back. But what the hell good would that do?
She has a life. She has a male. She doesn’t need me,
he reminded himself. And somehow he kept walking.
Kept walking until he could no longer smell her scent in the air or hear her soft, hopeless sobs behind him.
What’s wrong with you? Get hold of yourself!
Elise told herself sternly. But no matter how hard she tried to hold her emotions in check, the misery inside her couldn’t quite be contained. Tears leaked from her eyes, despite all she could do to stop them, and her hands trembled as she wrapped her arms around herself and tried to hold on. Tried to keep from shaking herself apart.
“Hey…” Olivia’s voice was soft and kind. “Hey, hon, I’m so sorry.” She put an arm around Elise and hugged her gently. “Cry if you need to. It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not.” Sniffing, Elise lifted her chin and made another effort to regain control. “He’s right. I have to get on with my life and he has to get on with his. I just…I don’t know why it hurts so much. I’ve only known him a few days.”
“Kindred guys get under your skin fast,” Olivia murmured knowingly.
“I guess they must.” Elise shook her head. “I know I shouldn’t have forgotten James but all I could think about was…was Merrick.”
“Don’t worry about it. After what you’ve been through, nobody would blame you if you forgot your own name,” Olivia said comfortingly.
“I suppose.” Elise sighed. “Well, I guess I’d better get dressed and…and go home.” Her voice broke on the last word but somehow she managed to keep herself from crying again.
Score one for the toughest prosecutor in Tampa,
she thought sourly.
I managed to keep from bawling like a baby. At this rate I’ll be emotionally stable and ready to go back to court in no time.
Olivia looked at her with obvious concern. “Do you really want to go? Or would you rather stay and talk to Merrick again? Because if you want to speak to him, I’ll go get him, and I can promise he’ll listen—I’ll see to that myself.” There was a steely glint in her gray eyes that made Elise believe she could carry through on her vow.
The prospect was tempting.
Maybe if I could just see him one more time, I could make him listen, make him understand. Maybe if I…No.
Reluctantly, she shook her head. “I’m afraid he’s right—there’s nothing more to say. I guess…guess I’d better be getting home.”
“All right, if you’re sure…” Olivia gave her an impulsive squeeze. “Listen, if you want to talk, I understand at least some of what you’re going through. I was captured by the AllFather too, you know. And I’ve had my share of Kindred man-troubles.”
“Thank you.” Elise hugged her back gratefully. “You’re very kind, but I think I just want to go home.”
“I understand.” Olivia pulled back and smiled. “But the offer still stands. Anytime you need someone to talk to about all this, just come to the HKR building and call me on the viewscreen.”
“I’ll remember that.” Elise sniffed and wiped her eyes. “Or I could just call you from James’ office—he has a viewscreen of his own.”
“Oh, I
thought
that background didn’t look like the HKR building.” Olivia nodded thoughtfully. “He must be really well-to-do to have one of his own. I understand they’re very expensive.”
Elise gave her a watery smile. “Nothing but the very best for James. He only wants the most exclusive equipment and he wants to be the first one to have it.”
Olivia frowned. “Did he get it used from one of the HKR buildings when they did an upgrade or something?”
“Oh, no,” Elise shook her head. “James never wants anything used. He had it built and installed to his specifications. He loves being the only businessman on the Eastern seaboard to have his own viewscreen. But if he found out someone else had it first…” She gave a choked laugh. “Let’s just say he wouldn’t be very pleased.”
“Sounds like he has good taste.” Olivia smiled at her. “He must, if he has you for a fiancée, don’t you think?”
Elise knew the blonde nurse was trying to cheer her up and she tried to smile. “You’re very sweet to say that. I…I guess I’d better get ready to go back to him.”
“I guess so.” Olivia smiled. “Come on, I found you something nice to wear for your trip back. I promised I would—remember?”
“Oh yes.” Vaguely, Elise did recall asking for some new clothes for the trip back to Earth. But it seemed like such a long time ago it was hard to remember. “Yes, of course.”
She followed Olivia back to the med station but she couldn’t keep herself from casting one longing glance down the corridor in the opposite direction. The direction Merrick had gone when he left.
* * * * *
“Hey, where did Elise go?”
Liv looked up from entering patient information on her monitor. She was standing at her post near the back of the busy but relatively quiet med station, and wondered how anyone could have snuck up on her. To her surprise, it was her cousin standing there with a covered plate in one hand and a tentative smile on her face.
“Oh hi, Lauren. She went home.” Liv sighed. “Just a little while ago, actually. I was going to tell you guys as soon as my shift ended.”
“Oh.” Lauren’s face fell. “I’m sorry I missed her. I was just coming over to tell her she could talk to me about, you know, what she went through if she wanted. But I guess I waited too long.”
Liv shook her head. “I don’t think she would have talked, hon. I offered too but she put me off. She’s a really sweet girl, but there’s something about her—she’s
closed
inside somehow.”