Authors: Evangeline Anderson
He took a deep breath and looked at himself in the mirror. His eyes had gone back to normal, which was a relief. The combination of
rage
and the killing frost which had come over him when he saw Elise threatened by that bastard had been a system overload in the extreme. When Merrick had broken in the window and saw him on top of her, he’d felt like the top of his head was about to explode. Well, he felt nicely contained now—now that the killing was done.
Walking out of the bathroom, he stepped over the bloody lump that was all that remained of Elise’s stepfather. Merrick was sorry about the mess in her domicile—he hadn’t meant to get blood everywhere that way. But in order to do some things right, you
had
to get a little messy. Revenge was definitely one of those things.
Looking down at the remains, he waited for the sense of regret to hit him, the feeling of guilt he always had to repress after the killing frost left him. But this time there was nothing. Nothing but relief that Elise would never have to worry about this male bothering her again.
This is what it’s for,
he realized suddenly.
This part of me I can’t turn off, can’t get away from. The part of me that’s neither Blood Kindred nor Beast Kindred and yet a little of both. The hybrid part.
He felt strangely content at the thought—it was like the killing frost was a weapon he’d had all his life and had finally found the right use for.
“You deserved it,” he told the lump on the floor. “And I’d fucking do it again if I had to.” Then he climbed through the bedroom window and started up the narrow, black metal stairs.
It occurred to him, while he climbed the short distance to the roof, that Elise might not feel the same way he did about the killing of her stepfather. She might still be upset or in shock. Probably she’d be completely traumatized by the whole thing—both the stepfather’s attack and his subsequent death.
She might never want to be with me again,
he thought, his apprehension growing as he stepped out onto the roof and headed for the ship.
She might never get over this last attack. It goes without saying we won’t be making love anytime soon, or probably ever, for that matter.
Not that he cared, he thought, stepping onto the ship’s on-ramp. He’d stay with her forever, even if the two of them were as celibate as a couple of Morian anti-pleasure nuns. Even if she never even wanted to hold his hand—
“Merrick!” Elise threw herself at him, breaking his morbid train of thought.
He caught her reflexively and held her tight, loving the feeling of having her in his arms again.
But a simple hug wasn’t enough for Elise. “I love you,” she whispered, wrapping her arms and legs around him and pressing her face to his neck. “Love you
so much.”
“Love you too, baby.” Merrick squeezed her gently, breathing in the warm scent of her hair and skin. “Are you okay?”
He felt her nodding against his neck. “Yes,” she whispered. “Now that you’re here, I’m better than okay.” She pulled back and looked at him. “But how did you get away? I thought…thought that horrible man with the silver eyes was going to…to kill you.”
Merrick shook his head. “It’s a long,
long
story. And you oughta know by now how hard I am to kill. Speaking of that…” He looked her in the eye, deciding to get it over and dispel any doubt she might have. “Your stepfather’s dead.”
Her response was immediate. “Good. I mean…” she looked down, biting her lip. “I know I shouldn’t feel like that. I shouldn’t…shouldn’t…”
“Yes, you should,” Merrick said fiercely. “After what he did to you? He fucking deserved everything I did to him and more.” He looked at her seriously. “I hope you understand why I had to do it. Why I had to kill him.”
She nodded. “I know. You’re not…you didn’t do anything I haven’t fantasized about myself. But I think if I’d done it myself it would have…have haunted me forever. So thank you, Merrick. Thank you for making sure he’ll never bother me again.”
“Never,” he promised. “I swear it.”
Elise shivered. “If you hadn’t come just in time…”
“But I did.” Merrick kissed her cheek. “Don’t think about it, baby. Don’t let your mind go there.”
“All right. I’ll try not to.” She took a deep breath. “I think he was planning this attack for awhile. James had been sending him pictures, feeding his obsession…”
“Wait a minute,
what
? That fucking fiancé of yours was
in
on this?” Merrick felt his eyes starting to grow hot again. “That’s fucked up. When I think that I had him right in front of me…”
“I know it’s awful,” Elise said hastily. “But please, Merrick, no more killing. Okay?”
He took a deep breath and, with a vast effort, sent the protective
rage
away. “All right. But he’d better not bother you again.”
“I’m sure he won’t,” Elise said and laughed a little jaggedly. “Not after…after he sees what you did to Charles. What…” she cleared her throat. “What
did
you do to him?”
“You don’t want to know,” Merrick said evenly. “Leave the blood work to me, baby. That way you can sleep with a clean conscience—all right?”
“All right, I guess.” Elise snuggled against him. “I’m just so glad and thankful you’re back. I don’t care about anything or anybody else.” She took a deep breath. “In fact, I don’t care if I never see this place again.”
“That’s probably a good thing, considering the mess I left in your domicile,” Merrick murmured. “And I’m pretty sure once your planet’s authorities find out I’m the one who did it, I won’t be welcome here anymore.”
“That’s okay,” she said softly. “I was thinking of moving up to the Mother Ship anyway. You know—for support.”
Merrick felt a weight he hadn’t known was there lift off his chest. “Good. Then we can be together for always.” He looked at her seriously. “And listen, Elise, I want you to know something—we can be together without doing anything to bring this back. Without…stirring up bad memories.”
She shook her head. “What exactly are you saying?”
He frowned, trying to think of a way to put it. “Just that I love you and I want to be with you, even if we have a, uh, unconventional relationship.”
“Unconventional
how
?”
Ah, hell…” He sighed. “Even if we never have sex. I don’t need that as long as I have you—okay?”
“That’s so sweet of you.” Elise gave him a tremulous smile. “I don’t really want to think of anything to do with
that—
with sex right now. But maybe later…”
“A long,
long
time later,” Merrick amended. “I’m not going to do anything to hurt you, baby—
ever.
I swear it. I just want you to know that I understand it could take you years to get over all this, and I’m good with waiting.”
“Oh, Merrick.” Elise pressed her face to his neck again and then he felt her shoulders shaking.
“Elise?” he asked, immediately worried. “Are you okay?”
“Yes. No. I…I don’t know. I’m sorry,” she whispered between sobs. “I don’t…don’t know why I’m crying.”
“That’s all right, baby,” Merrick murmured soothingly as he carried her up into the ship. “You don’t have to know. Just let it out.”
Cradled safe in his arms, Elise did.
“So you never got to tell me—what ever happened with you and Xairn?” Liv asked Lauren, leaning forward to take another slice of watermelon-broccoli-cheese quiche. Kat had dubbed the unusual looking concoction “disgusting in the extreme” even though she had been the one to make it for Olivia in the first place.
The girls were all gathered at Sophie’s suite, talking and laughing, and of course, eating. It was as warm and inviting as Liv had promised it would be and Elise already felt perfectly at home, even though she’d only been on the Mother Ship a little over a month.
“Oh, well…” Lauren blushed, her pale brown skin turning a warm rosy color. “Um…”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Olivia put a hand on her knee. “Me and my big mouth. Would you rather keep it private?”
“Too late.” Kat sat forward, grinning eagerly. “Spill it, doll. Did the big gray guy finally admit what was wrong? Or did he put you over his knee and spank you for daring to ask him in the first place?”
Lauren blushed even harder. “Kat!”
“Kat, leave her alone,” Sophie protested. “You know Lauren’s shy.”
“No, it’s okay.” Lauren laughed, even though she was still blushing. “If you
must
know, everything turned out all right.”
“
What
turned out all right?” Sophie asked plaintively. “Kat and Elise and I still don’t even know what the problem was in the first place.”
“Was he scared of hurting the baby?” Kat asked, looking pointedly at Lauren’s belly which was just beginning to develop a gentle curve.
“Or afraid he wasn’t going to be a good father?” Sophie said. “Considering how his own dad was, that would be
completely
understandable.”
Lauren frowned. “Surprisingly, no. He said it was these, uh,
dreams
he’d been having.”
“Dreams? Seriously? He’s using nightmares as an excuse for no nookie?” Kat looked skeptical.
“I know how it sounds, but Xairn says they seem so
real
.” Lauren looked down at her hands, a troubled look on her face. “He keeps dreaming of a girl who looks just like me but she’s
not
me. It’s really been bothering him.”
“Oh my God.” Sophie put a hand to her mouth. “Your clone!”
“Excuse me, what?” Elise had to ask. “Did you say Lauren has a clone running around?”
“Not running around,” Liv corrected. “At least, we
hope
not,” she added darkly.
“We left her far away from here, in another galaxy,” Lauren explained. “She was safe, though—with someone who was going to take care of her.”
“And I’m sure that’s where she still is,” Olivia said, patting her hand comfortingly. “Don’t worry about it, Lauren—you know the security on the Mother Ship is top notch.”
“Yes, I know.” Lauren made a visible effort to brighten up. “Honestly, I think it’s just another way Xairn’s subconscious is expressing his doubts about fatherhood. You know, ‘I couldn’t even take care of that clone, so how can I take care of this baby?’ That kind of thing.”
“Oh my God!” Kat suddenly burst out laughing. “I’m sorry, Lauren, but this conversation
so
belongs on a daytime talk show. It’s
too
weird.”
“Well, that’s life with a Kindred—or a Scourge,” Sophie said, grinning. “Weird, but wonderful.” She turned to Lauren. “I’m sure Liv is right and everything is going to be just fine.”
“I’m sure too.” Lauren smiled. “In fact, things are looking up already.” She glanced at Kat. “And
yes
, by ‘looking up’ I mean we had some pretty spectacular make-up sex, when I finally got to the bottom of the problem.”
“All right!” Kat leaned over and gave her a gentle high five. “The nookie train is back on track. Score one for the bonding fruit girls.”
“Bonding fruit?” Elise asked, turning her attention from the question of clones and the delicious strawberry vanilla swirl cupcakes which had been Lauren’s contribution to the girl-day brunch. “What’s that?”
Kat and Lauren shared a look and both of them laughed. “It’s a
long
story, hon,” Kat said. “Let’s just say it makes all things possible. And I do mean
all
things.”
“It’s a fruit that helps you, um, accommodate your Kindred mate,” Sophie said delicately. “Some of them are kind of you know,
large.”
Kat raised an eyebrow. “Like you have to tell
her?
She’s got the biggest guy of all. Sorry, Elise, but you know it’s true—Merrick is
huge.
I’m really glad my guys aren’t built on that scale.”
“Yes, he is kind of…of big.” Elise cleared her throat and looked down at her hands.
“I’m guessing he’s big where it counts, too—right?” Kat nudged her but Liv shook her head at her friend. Then she smiled at Elise and changed the subject.
“So how are you and Merrick settling in? Have you had any more problems with that ex-fiancé of yours?”
“He
tried
to make trouble,” Elise admitted. “Remember I told you he’d tricked me into signing a prenup saying I
had
to marry him?”
“He did
what?”
Kat exclaimed.
“Yeah, well it was my fault for just signing instead of looking over it first,” Elise said. “Anyway, when I didn’t show for the wedding, he put in a complaint to the Kindred High Council—he even tried to bring Merrick up on charges of murder.”
“Oh, no!” Sophie put a hand to her mouth. “When did this happen?”
“Not too long after we first came up here,” Elise said quietly. “I didn’t really feel like talking about it then, but well, I’m starting to feel better now.” She smiled at Liv who smiled back encouragingly.
“Well go on.” Kat made a motion with one hand. “What happened?”
Elise cleared her throat. “Merrick explained that the man he’d murdered had been, uh, trying to attack me at the time, so they cleared him of that charge right away. Apparently a Kindred warrior can’t be held responsible for what they do when the woman they love is in danger.”
“No, they can’t.” Sophie shook her head firmly. “They go into
rage.”
“It’s kind of a protective fury,” Liv explained. “If a Kindred thinks his female is in danger, there’s no stopping him until he eliminates that danger.”
“Yeah, and sometimes the elimination process can be kind of…messy.” Sophia winced.
“Messy. Right.” Elise nodded. “I, uh, know all about that.” Though she hadn’t seen her apartment after Merrick had finished with Charles, James had described it in graphic detail at the inquest. It didn’t change how she felt about the big Kindred a bit, but she had to admit it was a
little
frightening to be with a man who loved you so much he would do
anything
to protect you. Anything at all.
“Well, so they cleared him of the murder charges, but what about the prenup?” Lauren asked. “Did that hold up?”