PUSH: Ultra Alpha MMA Badboy Mafia Romance (Southside Brotherhood Book 2) (32 page)

“Yeah. Probably.”

“You and I, we both knew there was an ‘us’ back then. Neither of us were ready to admit it, but we knew. That night, when you came down those stairs, I’ve never fucking felt anything like that in my life. It wasn’t just that you blew my fucking hair back with your beauty -- because you did. But you had this desperation in your eyes, something that said, ‘I feel fragile, someone help,’ and it tugged at me like I couldn’t fucking believe. I wanted to run to you, put my arms around you, whisper in your ear how beautiful you looked and walk you around the whole damn night as your protector. I couldn’t, but it changed my fucking world. That feeling.”

“Yeah, then you remember how that glorious evening ended.”

“He’s a fuck. I don’t know if he was fucking born that way or what, I honestly don’t give a shit. I really don’t. Sociopath doesn’t even come close.”

“I wanted to disappear into the floor.”

“He was the one that should have wanted to disappear.”

“If you weren’t there, I don’t know — it would have been so much worse. I was so embarrassed.”

Even now as Flynn flashed back to that moment when they all walked to the dining room to take their seats. Colin telling the Henderson’s that Lilly would not be eating the same dinner as the rest them because he had her on a strict calorie restriction he felt the bile rise in his throat.

“Don’t be. Don’t fucking ever, ever be embarrassed about who you are. Everything about you is beautiful, honorable, special. You’re spectacular. Like a force of nature that somehow I’ve been lucky enough to have the honor of knowing. And, I intend to make you even more mine.”

Her eyes snapped away from Flynn’s face toward the window, the little glimmer gone and the curve of her lips going in the wrong direction.

“What? Babe, what?”

“Maybe there was some truth to what he said. I mean, look at me. The only thing I’d be the cover girl for is the Frumpy Nerd-Girl Times.”

Flynn’s hackles went up. That was about enough of that shit.

“Listen, right fucking now. Are you listening?” He raised his eyebrows and took her chin. Her eyes came to him with a roll.

Okay, I’m done. She needs more than just words right now. She needs an attitude adjustment and right on her ass.

“Jesus. Okay, first of all. Stop that. I’m not going to have it. Don’t fucking insult me with talking about yourself in the negative. That shit is done.
Done.
Second, what he said to you was the biggest kind of bullshit that exists. Nothing he says is about you. You are sexy and amazing, and I’m a lucky fuck to be able to have what I’ve had with you. What he said? That was about him. No real man would insult a woman — let alone the woman who was supposed to be his bride — like that. Not in private, not in his head, and sure as shit not in front of anyone else.”

There went the eye roll again, and both Flynn’s dick and his ire were ready to raise the damn roof.

“Stop that, too. That shit is disrespectful. I’ll never hurt you, I’ll never do anything to fucking hurt you. But, I’m going to tell you, sometimes you need a smack on your ass.”

“Oh really? And you intend to give that to me?” The sarcastic drip almost sent her over his knee right there.

Instead, he smiled with a knowing ache as he gently curled his fingers to push her hair behind her ears.

“Yes,” he answered softly. “And you’re going to appreciate it, and it will be what you need, and it will never be in anger. But, it’s going to fucking happen, so start getting your pretty little head around it.”

“So, what? You think we’re like —
together
? Like just because we both ended up here tonight, everything is just re-set, and we’re a couple? Because, I’m not sure we’re on the same page, and well, honestly, it’s just impossible. Nothing’s changed.
Nothing.
We are still just as stuck and screwed as we were a week ago.”

“No, we’re not. You know why?”

“Why?”

“Because, we can figure it out.
NO,
strike that, like I told you before, I am going to figure it out. And from this second, you are going to trust me. I’ve told you over and over to trust me; now you are going to fucking do it, because it’s no fucking accident we’re here, now. I don’t believe that so I’m taking control, and you are going to give it, get it? Understand?”

She licked her lips, and he could see she fought back another eye roll.

“You’re mine. Your problems are mine. So, just give it up.”

“If I decide I want this…” She fluttered her hand between where Flynn leaned into her, his arms locked into iron beams on each side of her legs. “Then, can I just have some time?”

“Maybe, maybe not. I don’t trade for obedience. I don’t trade for acceptance.”

“God.” She looked up at the ceiling. “Why does this have to be so hard?”

All right, bullshit talk is getting us exactly bullshit nowhere.

Flynn tasted her sweet lips, engulfing her grinding his teeth into hers.

He could hear muffled protests, but he was fucking done with the dance.

Chapter Twenty-six

In a single heartbeat, one of his arms swooped behind her, the other under her legs, throwing her off her seat and pulling her to him like a victim being carried from a burning building.

“You’re done. I’ve got something to say to you, and it ain’t gonna be with words.”

“God!
Put me down.”

Her protests didn’t mean a whole lot when her arms went around his naked shoulders and her hands locked in place.

“I’m going to put your ass down. Just hold on.”

His dick was as hard as nails with her against him. The tendons in his shoulders stood up and moved as he walked, every valley and line of his upper arms danced in the dim light as he strode toward a back hallway.

He’d vowed when he was young never to drink.

He’d never shot-up or snorted or smoked, and as far as vices went, his only one was violence — the taste of his own blood and reveling in releasing his vitriol on anyone who got in his way.

But, with her, his head spun, and he imagined what it would feel like to never taste her again. Never consume her with his body and his mind.

And he understood the craving of an addict.

The blackness of being without.

Inside the first bedroom stood an enormous log bed, covered with faded quilts just beginning to wear at the edges. Here where a pile of pillows waited, he would take the next hit of his personal heroin.

Her.

She gathered herself farther into him as he took the few steps. There was no doubt where they were going and what was going to happen, and Lilly fell silent in the power of his calm control.

His mouth came down as he lay her waves of fire onto the pillows. His tongue taking her deep, probing and showing her even now who was in charge.

Flynn’s lips lowered to feel her pulse, trailing down with his tongue as he felt the soft, warmth of her skin, felt the way her body tensed then released, her breath coming in small whimpers when he pulled her sweater away from her neck and bit down at the soft curve of her nape, teasing that little mole with his tongue first.

“Owwww. Does that spot taste extra good? ‘Cause it seems to be your favorite.” Her back arched into his hand and his cock started to weep at the thought of breaching her again.

Her protests gone.

“That’s nothing; I’m done playing. You are mine, yes?”

His teeth found home again, and she yelped and whimpered her agreement.

“Good. Because I’m going to taste you. All of you. Because you are all mine. And before I’m done, you’re going to scream until your voice is raw, and it better fucking be my name, you understand?”

With that — he yanked the hem of her sweater up. Jerking it off her head in one swoop.

“Shoes off,” he ordered as he buried his head into her neck again, working down with lips and tongue and teeth until he foraged at the wondrous crease between her magnificent tits.

There had always been this simmer inside him.

Something that called for control and dominance. He’d never felt it ignited in quite the same way as when she was close. But, it now felt like an inferno, and in the deepest part of his soul he knew it was what she needed and it was the truest part of who he was.

“God.” Lilly tensed under his mouth.

If it took him all night, his tongue was going to savor every supple inch of her. There would be no sleep, no other sustenance other than locking their lives together by virtue of his will.

He gathered the swell of her into his mouth, sucking and pulling her inside without regard. Flynn could hear little yelps and yipes, but between those were the breaths and the stifled moans he craved.

Flynn’s own rumble came from deep.

“Babe, god, you’re beautiful.” He raised up to look at her face as she stared down at him — mouth open, teeth on her lip — and his cock started doing roundhouse blows trying to get free.

She is mine. From the bottom of my fucking soul, I’ve never felt anything like this. Damn, that lip in her teeth. She’s trying to kill me right here between these tits.

He climbed above her, straddling her body and covering it like a bridge; elbows locked, hands flat next to her head, her legs straight between his. There was still drying blood on his ribs and the cuts over his face, and he looked like a dog that just won the final fight but took a damn beating in the process.

Even his teeth were bared as he stared down at his property, imagining all the ways he wanted to make her scream, to show her what it meant to be owned.

They’d only spent two nights together, but he knew her, and even the little innocent cherub liked it a little rough. It wasn’t the pain she craved; it was the control. The dance of give and take and then the utter release of yourself into the power of another.

Trust.

If nothing else, this was what she must feel. Flynn knew he would get her there. It may take a shit ton of patience, a heavy hand and a red ass, but it was in her nature to submit, and with him, therein would lie her true freedom.

He could see the questions in her eyes as he held himself silent and stared into her face. When he saw that flicker of release, that look that told him, “I’m waiting,” that was when he spoke.

“Are you ready?”

“For what?”

“Your punishment.”

“What punishment?” A hint of indignation came through, and Flynn felt both his dick and his hackles rise.

“First, tell me you trust me. Look in my fucking eyes, and tell me I’m not the one damn person in the world you trust.”

He didn’t blink.

He didn’t move.

He held himself over her like a conqueror.

It took her three breaths; then it finally came in a nod.

“Right. So, from here on out, when I tell you to do something, do it. And that starts right now. Take me out.”

Her eyes led the way but in a few heartbeats, her hands followed.

Flynn could see them shaking, but as soon as he felt her fingertips brush his skin and she began to work the button on his jeans, his body shook from the inside out.

The week without her felt like more than eternity, and his boy was locked down and ready to serve. It was all he could think of; her body was a carnival, and his crazy ass cock wanted to ride every damn ride twice.

Her hands were more than amazing.

She was rushing just enough; he could feel the tension between their bodies humming and the first brush of her fingers against the head of his dripping monster sent a rush of heat over his skin, and he had to close his eyes and steady himself.

“Good girl. Give me your mouth.” Flynn took her offered lips and sucked her tongue while her hands worked the steel below, throwing gasoline on the fire that was quickly engulfing them.

He held her tongue while she began to lay some strokes on his steel, his balls already pulled up, and the tip began to drip. She didn’t hesitate, she rubbed the pre-cum with her hand and held steady, stroking and waiting for instructions.

“Yes, babe, that’s good.” He broke the kiss to stare into her eyes.

He needed her naked, but the thought moved and stopped with the way her hands were taking him straight to heaven, putting his dick in charge of the moment.

Lilly’s mouth opened just so her tongue could come out to lick her lips, and he could see the intensity growing in her face.

The sight of her half-shut eyes the magnificent tangle of her hair crazy from the storm ignited the sense of protectiveness he felt for her. For someone who never even thought of love, all the years of not having it were saved up for her.

Both her hands were on him now, stroking and working. Flynn lowered to take her mouth in a quick kiss then bask in the glory of her tits again. He practically broke his neck trying to reach them without disrupting the carnival down below, and Flynn began to eat the tightening pink circles, knowing he was already gone.