Authors: Nana Malone
"
H
ave you heard anything
?"
Kiss looked up to see Christian running down the hall. She pushed herself to stand even though her hip was killing her now. She hadn't stretched and she'd pay for it in the morning. But right now she needed to focus on her family. "He's still in surgery. His oncologist came out and explained things to me in very doctory terms. All I really understood was that he needed to have another mass removed off his lung. I'll tell a nurse that you're here and they can explain to you properly."
He frowned a little. "They didn't wait for me?"
Shit
. Now was not the time to add fuel to the fire of the feud between father and son. "We're both listed as next of kin and they couldn't reach you."
He nodded. "I guess it makes sense, since you're living at the house now."
She wouldn't tell him that she'd been added to the next of kin ever since he'd joined Gifford. When TJ had told her what he planned to do, she'd been pissed, but this time, it made sense. Despite whatever else was going on with Christian right now, they were family of sorts and needed each other.
They reached for each other and Kiss gave him a tight hug. But she also released him quickly, more than aware that things weren't okay with them yet. "Do you want a coffee or anything? It tastes like monkey ass, but at least it's something."
He shook his head. "I'll call someone to bring in something drinkable in a bit."
Of course he would. "Look, I know you and TJ haven't been speaking much lately, but he'd be happy to know you're here."
Christian shoved his hands in his pockets of his Prada slacks and looked down at his shoes. "Yeah, I'm not so sure about that. We've said some pretty hateful things to each other. Some of those things said, can't be taken back."
She reached out and touched his arm. "Anything can be taken back, if it's done from a place of love. We all say things."
He met her gaze sheepishly, then nodded. Taking a seat next to her, he asked, "So where's Derek? I figured he'd be here."
Fantastic
. Just what she didn't want to talk about. And the only thing she didn't want more than to not talk about Derek was to get a lecture from Christian on how right he'd been. "He left. Went to Miami for a job interview."
There were several beats of silence. Finally, he said. "I'm sorry, Kiss. For what I said to you. I know it must hurt that he left. I know I was way out of line. It's your life. And I'm pretty sure I overstepped." He shrugged. "I was more than a little jealous."
Great, so they were doing this right now? "I get it. We've lived in this murky territory for a long time and that's my fault. You've always been my rock and I depend on you. I probably confused things. I didn't mean to hurt you. Not with Antonio or with Derek. I love you, just not the way you want me to." Kiss puffed out her cheeks. "And you were right. He did hurt and leave me."
He expelled a long breath. "That's not what I wanted."
She slanted him a look and he chuckled. "Okay, yeah, I wanted him gone, but not you hurt. Never hurt."
"I know." This was the Christian she knew. Derek was hell-bent on proving he had something to do with her crash. But she knew him. Certainly better than Derek did. He was her family. "Speaking of hurt, uhm…" Now how did she do this? Not like there was a right time. "You may want to watch your back with Antonio. He's been slinging mud around."
Christian stiffened and pulled his hand from hers. "Oh yeah? Like what?"
She shook her head. "It's insane. He suggested you had something to gain by my crash. He tried to insinuate you had something to do with it."
His nostrils flared. "That's a lie. It was an accident. Your tires blew. Did I somehow cause that?"
She opened her mouth to tell him about the explosion, but a tiny voice inside told her to keep that to herself. No point in bringing that all up, not now. She'd wait until TJ was back on his feet. She also didn't bring up any of that shit from their past. There was no point now. When the dust settled, she was going to talk to Antonio herself. "I know. But that's what his story is right now. I know you guys are on the same team and I assumed you were close, but looks like he's got a grudge or something so watch your back."
Christian nodded. "I got you." He licked his lips. "Thanks for that. After everything. I probably didn't deserve the warning."
Kiss shrugged. "Look, no matter what happens, you and I, we're family. I'll always look out."
"Yeah, we are family, aren't we?"
And right now, he was all she had. When he threw an arm around her, she settled into the hug and for once forgot not to pull back quickly. She was tired. And lonely, and missed Derek so much she could barely breathe. It felt good to be held. Even if Christian was a poor facsimile. As the two of them sat and talked, she couldn't help but think how this was just like the old times when they were kids. The two of them taking care of each other.
***
As Derek reviewed additional information Delilah had sent him, his phone chimed with a Google alert he'd set up when he first started working with Kiss. When he saw the title, ice spread from the center of his chest through his whole body. "TJ Daniels, owner of Daniels Racing has been admitted to the hospital. The family has asked that the public give them privacy during this time. Story still developing.”
Kisima was all alone. If TJ died she'd have no one. He certainly didn't count Christian.
His first instinct was to pack his shit and get on the first plane back. But prevailing minds won out. If she wanted him, she would have called. She claimed she loved him, but she would never reach out to him for help even when she needed it. For the last three days he'd been trying to figure out a way for him to have both his dream and Kiss. Until he dealt with Kallie that wasn't going to happen. So he had to make a little trip to NOLA first. But he could be there for Kiss now, even if she didn't want his support. He hit her speed dial number and said a little prayer as he paced his hotel room. Please don't go to voicemail, please don't go to voicemail. Please— Kiss picked up on the fourth ring.
"Derek?" She sounded confused and worn out.
"Kiss, hey. I'm so sorry. I heard on the news about TJ."
There was a long pause and he worried she'd hung up on him. Finally, she spoke. "I didn't think you'd call."
Damn. Didn't she know how much he cared about her? "Kiss, of course I'd call. I've been calling every day since I left."
"Really? Funny how I don't have any voicemails or missed calls."
What? "I called you, Kiss. I've been calling. I call to just say hi. I call to check on you. I call to ask about TJ. I've been calling."
"Like I said, I haven't gotten a single voicemail." Then she said, "You know what, I don't want to fight with you. What do you want?"
This wasn't going at all according to plan. He'd thought, or rather hoped, she'd be happy to hear from him. He'd hoped she missed him as much as he missed her. Maybe he'd been wrong about that.
No
. He wasn't wrong. She knew how much he cared about her.
Not like you told her you loved her.
But he'd done everything he could to show her. She had to know. “I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry about TJ and I'm sending thoughts and prayers his way. He's a good dude."
"Thank you," she said softly.
"I'm really sorry. I can't imagine how hard this has been for you."
She sniffled and her voice wavered. "It's been a really rough couple of weeks."
And because he couldn't help telling her, he said, "I miss you."
Her voice broke. "Please don't. I don't have the energy for this. All my energy is into taking care of TJ."
"I understand. I just—"
Just what asshole?
"I just wanted to—"
Hear your voice
. "Tell you I was thinking about the two of you. If you need anything, at all, please let me know."
Her voice went whisper soft again. "Thank you."
When she hung up, he sank onto his bed.
Fuck
. He loved her. He hated her feeling like she was all alone. He'd contributed to that. She was right about him. He'd taken the first opportunity to run away and exercise his independence. She needed him and he wasn't there for her. He'd been terrified about being locked in. Now all he wanted was to be with her. Because it was the first time he'd felt settled in years.
He might not have been there when she needed him, but he could make up for that a little bit. Determined to let her know that he was here for her, he made a call. When his mother answered, relief washed through him. "Hey, Mom. I need a favor."
L
ater that afternoon
at his interview, Derek's mind kept drifting back to TJ and Kisima.
Focus, damn it
. This was the third time during this fucking interview that his mind had drifted to her. He dragged his unwilling focus back to Jeremiah, who was asking about training philosophy.
This was what he'd been preparing for. He gave the answers he'd worked on, complete with how athletes needed to be looked at as long-term partners on the team, not just for short-term gain, so his training methodologies reflected that, based on what was best for long-term health.
Next, they asked him about his success stories and the one thing he'd do differently. For starters he would have stayed the fuck away from Kallie. Or, in hindsight, he would have recorded every interaction they had. As it was he couldn't believe he was voluntarily going to NOLA to see her. For so long, he would have done everything he could to have an opportunity at getting back to the team. Anything. Now, that didn't matter the way that it used to. But he and Kallie, they had unfinished business.
The general manager leaned back in his chair. "So let's be real. You know what you can bring to the team and I know what you can bring to the team. But what I want to know is if you're committed to being in Miami. I know NOLA was a home for you. After LSU, I know you favored the Jaguars."
"Yes, well, before my injury I thought I'd get to play for them one day. Working for them was a dream come true. But there comes a point in everyone's life that they have to move on."
Jeremiah nodded. "I've been asking around about you, son."
Son? He was only ten years older than Derek. Derek clamped his jaw together, trying to remind himself that the guy came from Alabama and that's just how they talked.
"Then you'll know that I'm good at what I do. Deyshawn Wallace recovered well under my care. I can clearly do the job. It's a matter of if we match philosophically and can agree on if this is somewhere I'd want to work or not."
Jeremiah leaned forward. "This is also the part where I see if crossing the Endelsteins for you is worth the headache. Are you worth the headache?"
If Derek locked his jaw any tighter, he'd crack a molar. He forced himself to relax. "The Endelsteins have no cause to block my hiring, or have you heard differently?"
Jeremiah met his gaze and Derek didn't waver. In the end, it was Jeremiah who shifted his gaze away.
"No. I haven't heard differently. Miami's a great city."
"Yes it is."
"And the women here are beautiful. You'll be hard pressed to find another city with women like we have."
Derek understood. Jeremiah was trying to build camaraderie, but all he was doing was pissing him off right now. The only woman he was interested in right now was Kisima. Was she okay? How was she surviving? Should he call her again?
Yes.
Call her and say what? "I love the city and the position sounds great. But I have a long-term plan and I want to make sure we're on the same page about that. This is only a stepping stone. I want to be a head coach before I'm forty."
Jeremiah sat up straighter. "And we support that. You're driven and that's something we reward here. We just need to find you the right path for that. But if that's something you want, we can make that happen." Jeremiah grinned as he shook his head. "To think I almost missed out on the opportunity to talk to you. We respect Keshon on this franchise, but he didn't have the kind of monetary influence that Christian Daniels has. His father, TJ, has a silent stake in several teams."
Derek frowned, even as his temperature spiked. "Christian?"
Jeremiah nodded. "Yeah. He called a couple of weeks ago. Told me I was making a mistake of a lifetime if I didn't interview you. Told me about the work you were doing with Jennings, the driver." He nodded. "Excellent stuff."
Nausea made his stomach roil. He wasn't here because the team thought he'd be a fit. He was here because Christian wanted him out of the way.
Derek wasn't sure how he managed to finish the rest of the interview, but he did just barely. He staggered out and didn't let himself take a steady breath until he was back in his car. Once he was past the gate, he called his brother.
"How'd the interview go?"
"Oh, you know. The usual. Check out the facilities, they prance some half-naked women in front of you and then the assistant general manager gets uptight when he thinks you're coming for his job eventually. Oh yeah and drops the bomb that Christian Daniels suggested you for the job."
Dylan's response was swift. "What the fuck?"
"Yeah, you heard that right."
"Let me guess, to get you away from Kisima?"
"I knew you were a smart dude."
"I got some news on that front. Bates was right to point a finger in his general direction. Daniels has a lot to gain from Kiss not racing. But not for the reason that Bates thinks."
Derek's stomach pitched. And like a fool, he'd left her to fend for herself? He was an asshole. "What's the reason?"
"You know how Daniels Racing is owned and held in trust for Christian until the day his father dies?"
"Yeah,"
"Well, TJ is a smart son of a bitch. When he took over, he not only outlined and restricted what was considered Daniels Racing, but he branched out under a separate company name. He structured that company so that technically it's not part of Daniels Racing. It's a partner. It includes the racing school, merchandizing, and sponsorship deals. Old boy's got a lot of money that he spends wisely. One thing he likes to spend money on is professional sports teams. And while the racing team makes a decent sum, the real money is in the side businesses. TJ's a smart and savvy businessman, brokering deals in the hundreds of millions. And he's been partnering with sponsors on other endeavors besides racing in exchange for them sponsoring his drivers and team. Which is why Kisima is such a marketing engine."
"I still don't get how this is bad for Christian. He'll just be richer when the old man dies."
"No, not good for Christian. Good for Kiss. If and when the old man dies, she becomes a billionaire."
Derek almost choked on his own tongue. "Say what? Yo, I think you said B by accident."
His brother spoke slowly as if he were talking to a child. "You heard me right. She's set to get everything."
And she had no idea. "Maybe he feels guilty because his wife killed her father. Maybe he really thinks of her like a daughter."
"Try his actual daughter."
"I don't understand."
"A few years ago, he had a paternity test done. Only reason I found it was because he owns a good deal of shares in a company called Gene Labs. Guess what their main business is?"
"Paternity testing," Derek muttered numbly.
"Yep. I followed the white rabbit. There were no names attached, but the blood he tested against was female with blood type AB, which is rare. And had traces of an anti-malarial drug in the sample. Couple that with the test being ordered by a silent holding company of TJ’s, I made some assumptions. Then I ran what I found against Kisima Jennings’ medical records on file with F1. I'm jumping to a conclusion here, but it makes sense if you tell me they're that close."
Derek knew from her charts that Kisima was AB. "If it's true, she has no idea." If it was true, then she was about to lose her father all over again. "Shit, does Christian know?"
"That's where it gets tricky. He might. If he's seen a will or any paperwork with the structure of the company, then he knows. To make matters worse, there's trouble in paradise with Gifford. Apparently, the Daniels heir isn't performing like Gifford hoped he would as Director of Sponsorship. They thought maybe he had his father's Midas touch. And he's doing okay, but he is still underperforming. Word is Gifford had given him one more season to pull in the kind of deals Daniels is pulling or he's out."
Derek shuddered when he remembered how much Christian wanted Kiss. She was his
sister
. If he knew, that was just… He forced himself to swallow past the rising bile. "Great, even more reason to resent Kisima. But could he kill her or at least try to?"
"People have done worse for less money."
"Do we have anything tying him to the bomb?"
"No, either he was careful or he outsourced. But I have something better, a potential witness."
"Oh shit. Is it okay if I kiss you?"
"Don't get excited yet, I still need to question him. But it's a lead."
"Dude, tell me as soon as you hear something."
"I will."
Derek paused. The words stuck on his tongue for a minute. "Dylan, I appreciate it."
"Yeah, yeah, anything in the name of love."
By the time Derek reached the airport, he had a plan. After New Orleans, he wouldn't be heading home, he was going back to L.A. He just hoped he hadn't screwed up too badly and Kiss would take him back.
Before he boarded his plane, he called her. Again, his call went straight to voicemail. Since they'd last spoken, he'd called her half a dozen times and left her messages just to let her know he was thinking about her.
"Hey, Kiss. It's me...again. I'm getting on the plane to New Orleans now and I wanted to check in on you and TJ. I hope he's out of surgery and feeling better. I know you don't believe it right now, but you aren't alone. I might not physically be there, but I'm here when you want to talk. I'm sending TJ some good vibes. Call me if you need me."
He wouldn't be waiting on her call. As soon as he was done with Kallie, he was going to go get her. Make her see how sorry he was, that they belonged together.
***
Kiss held onto TJ's hand and watched him sleep. The doctor had said he'd be out for a while post surgery and he needed to rest. Rest or not, she wanted to be here when he woke up. "New rule, TJ, you can't scare the shit out of me anymore. No more death and dying, that's an order." Of course, he didn't answer.
As much as she hated to admit it, Derek's call yesterday had made her feel better. A lot better actually. Like maybe she wasn't all alone. Sure, she had Leah, who made sure she ate and slept. And Christian came every day, but nothing had had the same effect on her as hearing Derek's voice. She didn't want to be dependent on him, but it as the truth.
"Kisima?"
She looked up to see a smiling woman in her mid to late fifties maybe. Everything about her said warmth and compassion. "Yes. Can I help you?"
The woman smiled. "I'm Violet Raines. Dr. Violet Raines."
"Oh, you're one of TJ's doctors?"
The woman smiled again and Kiss couldn't help thinking that it would be a real shame if this woman wasn't a mom or a teacher or something. She had that sort of loving patience in her eyes that could set everyone at ease. "I'm a consultant actually. I'm a Pulmonary Oncologist. I've had a chance to review your father's case. I'm here to answer any questions and address any concerns you might have."
Relief flooded her veins. She was so happy she forgot to correct the woman's assumption.
"I have a million questions. Dr. Erlichman and her interns were great, but I don't know. I guess I understand everyone is busy and can't sit here and hold my hand with every little question I have."
"Sometimes it can be like that. That's what I'm here for." Violet indicated the love seat crammed into the corner of the room. "May I?"
"Yes, please." For the next hour, Kisima asked her every question she could think of to ask about TJ's recovery, to additional care, to personality questions. Pretty much everything she could think of and Dr. Raines answered them fully, more importantly patiently.
Finally, Kiss had to add, "I'm so grateful that you've taken the time, but, I feel bad that I've pulled you from other patients."
"Don't you worry about that. When Sarah called asking me to come in and talk to you and answer your questions, of course I said yes. Besides, it's pretty hard to say no to your best friend since residency."
"I—uh. I'm sorry, who? I don't know a Sarah."
Violet smiled. "Not yet anyway. I believe you have her son Derek to thank for my little visit today. He called in a favor."
Derek? He'd done this for her. Just to give her peace of mind. Tears pricked her eyelids and she blinked rapidly, hoping to quell them. Why did he have to keep doing things like that? It confused her, especially when he'd been the one to leave her. "I don't even know what to say."
Violet patted her knee. "I don't think you have to say anything. No one calls in a favor like this unless it's love. And for Derek that's quite the feat."
Kiss shook her head. “Why would he do this? I mean, he left me."
Violet shook her head. “I've known that boy since he was eight. He's got this need to separate himself from people who love him. It terrifies him that somebody who loves him might one day get up and walk away like his mother did, so he has just learned to be really independent and live without it. Sarah had a hell of a time getting through to that one, but Sarah being Sarah, she eventually did. With Derek, you just have to show up every day and love him. He gets the message eventually."
"It's probably too late for that. Once I found out he was leaving I told him never to come back."
Violet gave her one of those gentle smiles. "Something tells me he has no intention of listening to you."