Raven (22 page)

I put my hand against the dead log that lay beside me, feeling nothing but sadness. I would miss it here, but as I had seen in Heaven, it was obvious that I belonged there. In Heaven, nothing needed me—it only wanted me. In Heaven, I could finally breathe. My life was better served in a place where I could blend in, just another being with some magical talent, as all the others there.

When I was a little girl, in my human life, I used to think that magic was what I read in fairy tales. I imagined goblets of fire and wands, flying beams of light and
hocus pocus.
Now, though, I saw that magic was much more tangible, something much more organic. It was not like that of the magic in books. It was something that was individual to most, something like a notion. It was the kind of magic no one saw coming, the kind that if they did witness, they wouldn’t believe. I knew that tomorrow, though, my magic would leave behind believers. I would spawn a world of grateful humans—humans that will either loathe, or love me.

My thoughts next fell to Edgar, wondering how he was, wondering
where
he was. I didn’t expect that when I left, he would come after me. He knew as well as I that saying goodbye would only feel like another end, which it wasn’t. This time I knew he was safe, I knew he was alive, and I knew my way back to him. But something inside me still could not shake the feeling. I was so conditioned to lose him, that there was no way I could make the ache in my chest stop. I had ignored it a good portion of the day, but now it was boredom that was calling in the doubt. That was all, and I needed to understand that. This would work.

I balled up my satchel and pushed it under my head. The damp leather smelled like dark coffee as it entered my nostrils. Unable to handle the scent, I breathed through my mouth instead. I forced my eyes shut, hoping that sleep would make time go faster. I heard my heart beat in rhythm with the drops of rain and it lulled me, the steam from my breath began to fill my small enclosure, finally warming my frozen skin. In the morning, everything would be better.

THE NEW WORLD

Estella

I woke to a dull silence, light filtering through the woods. It had stopped raining, and the wind was silent. I furrowed my brow as I slid from my enclosure, looking toward the sky as an indicator of what was happening. The clouds there were thick but still, lurking down on me as they engulfed the mountains. I cursed under my breath, wondering how high the clouds reached and hoping I could still get above them. At least the wind had stopped, which was a good thing, making my flight there easier. For the first time in a while, I could hear my footsteps while outside, reminding me of my presence, but also loneliness. My feet sank into the drying sand, the groundcover around me still thriving despite the fact that the sun did not shine.

I examined the landscape around me, seeing it was completely dead now, all but my little area. I let out a slow breath, my ears filled with sound of lapping waves from the lake. I walked back to my small shelter and grabbed my satchel. I walked to a clear spot in the groundcover and sat in the sand, pulling the satchel into my lap. I dug inside, pulling out a new journal, a pen, and the red cube. I set the red cube in the sand before me, snuggling it down as it formed a bed around it.

I then brought the journal into my lap and opened to the first page. This journal was to be the first to denote a new time in my life, a new era. I was nervous, there was no denying that, but writing would calm me. I pressed the pen to the page and ink flooded into the paper.

Here I am, on the cusp of it all, wondering what will happen and how it will be from here on out. I want to say goodbye to so many things, but I will not get the chance. I think of Scott and Sarah, and my foster mother, Heidi. I think about the day I came here, the way it felt to finally break free. I have come a long way, far further than most ever will in their lives. When I think about it, I see that it was all for love, the love of happiness and the love of Edgar. I still wish I could remember before, but I am at peace knowing that I never will.

I put the pen down and grabbed the cube, taking a deep breath as I looked through it, seeing the beautiful lake as it once had been. I tried to remember every detail, every wave and every line. I balanced it in one hand, digging the other hand into the sand beside me and scooping up a handful, letting it filter back to the ground through my fingers. It felt dry, gritty and tired.

I stood then, finding that waiting was not making this any easier. I dropped the cube onto the ground, watching as it sank with a dull thud. I shook the jitters from my hands and held them at my sides, shifting into my changeling as I flew across the lake in a circle, diving back for the cube on the shore, grabbing it with my talons.

I flapped my wings a few times as I took off skyward, ducking into the dense clouds and working my way up. I couldn’t see anything, the dense cover like cotton. The sight of the cloud brought me back to my time in Heaven, when we had descended into the thick mists over the lake. It had taken us a long time to get through it, and I only hoped it wasn’t the same now.

I kept moving upward, beginning to doubt myself as I pressed the thoughts away. For as much as I wanted to believe I was failing, that I would never reach the top, I knew that I would. I had seen it, as though it had already happened. The prophecy showed me many views of how it would happen, so I knew it would because no matter what, I made it at least this far every time. I felt my wings begin to tire, the cube beginning to slip in my grasp. I let go with one foot before grasping again, my claw trying to find traction but the cube was too strong to allow it.

I was sweating now, my mouth dry. I closed my eyes, thinking of everything that was happening below and building the strength to go on. When I opened them, I saw sunlight was beginning to shine through the thick clouds, glittering off the misty dew that now coated my feathers. I breathed harder now, knowing I was almost there.

With what little energy I had left, I burst up and through the cloud layer, flying above it as the sun blinded me and I was forced to look away. I blinked a few times, feeling the cube in my grasp begin to burn. I looked down at it, squinting through aching eyes. Red light was pouring from the cube now, glowing onto the clouds as they began to burn off, forming a funnel that shot downward like the eye of a hurricane. I saw the Earth below, the color of it slowly changing from brown to green.

I gasped as I blinked a few times, my eyes watering in pain. The clouds continued to dissipate, my view on the world opening up as the blanket that wrapped it began to unfold. Tears were running down my white feathers, my feet burning. The pain was unbearable but I held on, flapping my wings as a way to distract myself. It was then that I felt the cube begin to shake, overloaded with sunlight as I came to the end of what I could handle. The cube began to expand and I could no longer hold on. I suddenly felt faint as my heart filled with fear. I could not pass out. I could not let go.

I looked down at the cube with frantic eyes, my feet trying to hold on but I could no longer make my feet move. I felt myself falling now, my wings too stiff to fly any longer. The air around me was warm, and I let myself go, my mind telling my body that this was it—it was time to give up. My heart sank as I fell, leaving all I had loved behind, all the beauty, and all the life.

Edgar…

NIGHTMARE

Edgar

In my dreams, I saw Elle falling. I felt her heart stop, a ripping sensation burning inside my cold chest.
No!
I thought.

“
No!”
I woke with a jolt, the foreign room in Edgar Poe’s house dark and forboding. My chest throbbed, my heart breaking as my forehead beaded with sweat. I sat up, my wings surrounding me as I lay in a pile of black feathers on the floor.

“
Elle!”
I yelled. I hoisted my body off the floor, my muscles aching. I stumbled to a nearby table, grasping it as it threatened to snap under my weight.

My body was numb, my feet responding in a way that was no longer controlled by my own mind. There was a sharp feeling in my soul—a feeling of loss and darkness. I heard a commotion outside the door as Sam stormed into the room.

“
Edgar, what is it?”
Sam looked at me, horrified, his face suggesting that he already knew.

I gasped for air, bringing my hand to my throat. Sam dove under me as I began to tumble to the ground, catching me and pulling me up. Edgar Poe rushed into the room, his face hallowed and frightened.

“
Sam, what’s going on?” he asked, touching his arm.

I saw Sam give Edgar Poe a grave look as his eyes sank to the floor.

“
She’s gone,” Sam replied. His voice was plain, but his grasp on me was firm.

PART II

RENOVATIO

Rebirth

JUST MOVE...

Shallow breaths were all I could manage, my limbs still feeling apart from my body, as though I had been ripped apart. I kept my eyes shut because it was the only thing I could control, but also because I was too afraid to see what had happened. My ears slowly stopped ringing and I could hear the sound of a gentle breeze working its way toward me. At last it fell across my skin. I felt my body stitch itself back together with each hair that rose, reminding me of limbs I still had. I slowly spread my fingers, feeling the ground where I lay, feeling the waxy texture of vegetation and the rough sandy dirt. I swallowed, and then slowly filled my lungs with a large gulp of air.

I opened my eyes, blinking a few times as everything came into focus. Blue sky slowly filled my vision, so rich and dark that I hardly recognized it.

The sound of rustling leaves rapidly flooded my ears, ringing less and less with each passing minute. I let my eyes roll around in their sockets, looking from one side to the other, noting that not a single cloud marked the sky. There was a sharp pain in my chest, like an acute burning sensation. I slowly lifted my hand. It felt weightless as I brought it to my chest and I rested it just below my collar bone. I felt my heart beating, slow and steady, envisioning the blood as it rushed through my body. I tried to locate the exact point of the burning, but it was like an itch I couldn’t scratch. I tried to move then, but stopped. Every muscle in my back ached like it never had before. I winced, allowing the ground to hold me a minute longer.

My hand slowly fell from my chest and back to my side. I was unable to force my muscles to work much longer. I felt along the ground, feeling sand and foliage. The waxy vegetation tickled my fingers, but it did not try to wrap itself around me as it normally would. It no longer gave me comfort as it had for so long. I grabbed a bit of it and tugged, pulling it from the Earth. I brought it to my face, seeing that it was thicker than I had ever seen it before, the roots well grown and deep. I dropped the handful to the ground and tried again to sit up. My back cried out in pain and I let a whimper pass my lips. Painful sharp breaths escaped my lungs, my eyes watering so I shut them. Once up, I pulled my knees into my chest, hoping the pain would stop but it was relentless. My mind began to remember all that had happened as the previous events rushed back to me.

I opened my eyes then, feeling something warm drip down my leg, suddenly feeling cold as the wind blew across it. I touched it with my hand, wincing as it stung. I pulled my hand back, seeing it was now stained with blood. I gasped and craned my neck to inspect my leg, watching with horror as blood dripped into the Earth. There was a deep crimson stain in the sand, suggesting that I had been bleeding for quite some time. I wiped my hand across the vegetation and once again touched the gash with my finger, frightened by the fact that it wasn’t clotting. I swallowed, grabbing at my shirt and ripping a strip of fabric from the hem. I pressed the fabric against the wound, applying a painful amount of pressure to try and stop the bleeding.

I looked up as the pain shot through my bones, seeing I was back on the beach by the lake. I forgot about the pain completely as I saw that the lake was transformed, shocked by its sudden beauty. A blue heron flew just inches from the water, its image reflecting on the calm surface. Sunlight glittered off a forest of green trees, the gentle breeze taking every leaf, and every pine needle, for a ride. I watched the trees, seeing them sway as though waving at me. I heard a hefty grunt from nearby, and I shifted my gaze to the left and up the hill, seeing a bear climb from the woods and walk to the water’s edge for a drink.

I froze, watching it and hoping it wouldn’t see me. When he had had his fill, he backed away from the water’s edge and walked to a nearby tree where he reached up and grabbed a fat pinecone, bringing it to his mouth for a nibble before lumbering on down the bank and out of view. A splash of water pulled my attention away from the bear and back to the lake, just in time to see the water ripple away from what I suspected had been a fish.

I rubbed my forehead, trying to center myself and put things back together. It was obvious that the cube had worked. The world had returned, more amazing than ever, just as I had suspected.

I tried to stand on weak legs, wobbling precariously as I turned in a complete circle, positioning myself. I spotted my shelter from the night before and walked up to it, seeing my satchel lying in the sand beside it. I lifted it from the ground and threw it onto my back with great effort. My thoughts were fogged so I did the only thing that seemed to make sense and began to head up the hill toward the woods, toward the cave and back home. I walked on the path where the college once stood, seeing that it now was almost completely swallowed by the earth, leaving only the faintest sign that humans had ever been here.