Reckless (23 page)

Kellan didn’t answer him. Hands clenched into fists, he disappeared without a backwards glance at his band. We all stood and stared after him. “What’s he gonna do?” Matt
asked the room. No one had an answer, and a feeling of dread pricked my skin. I knew exactly what he was going to do. What he always did when things got too hard. He was going to run.

I took off after Kellan, the guys following after me. Kellan wasn’t on the stairs, and for once the stunning view didn’t impress me. Nothing was impressing me at the moment, because
I was pretty sure I was going to have to do something I did
not
want to do. I was going to have to convince Kellan to make out with another woman. No, not just make out. Simulate a love
scene. Somehow, that made the whole thing ten times worse.

I found Kellan in our room. Face stormy, he was shoving shirts in his bag. My empty bag lay beside his. A part of me wanted to start packing up my stuff in silent concession. That would be an
infinitely easier choice. Instead, as Evan, Matt, and Griffin trailed into the room behind me, I asked, “What are you doing?”

Kellan glanced up at me, his eyes blazing. “Pack your stuff. We’re going home. I’m done.”

Griffin immediately burst out, “What the fuck, Kellan?”

Evan put a hand on Kellan’s shoulder, trying to calm him down; Kellan shrugged him off. Matt quietly countered with, “We signed a contract, Kellan. We can’t just walk
away.”

Kellan glared at Matt, snapping, “Then they can fucking sue us! I’m not whoring myself out for them. I’m going back to Pete’s. Are you guys coming with me or not?”
Knowing that all of this was ultimately because of me, my heart thudded in my chest in a painful staccato rhythm.

Griffin gaped at him. “You are the biggest fucking pussy—”

Kellan took two aggressive steps toward Griffin, silencing him. Evan stepped between the pair, his hands on Kellan’s shoulders. Matt put a hand on Griffin’s chest, keeping him back
as well. There was suddenly so much tension in the air that I knew nothing constructive was going to happen while everyone was present. Kellan needed to be calmed down, not confronted. And, at the
moment, I was the only one who could do it. I hated that the power was in my hands. Especially when going back to Pete’s sounded like a fabulous idea.

Keeping my eyes locked on Kellan, I told the guys, “Could you give me a moment with my husband, please?”

Kellan snapped his eyes to mine, his expression still searing. Evan stepped away from Kellan, squeezing my arm before he left. Matt dragged Griffin out of the room, but not before Griffin
shouted, “You talk some fucking sense into him, Kiera!
This
is bullshit!”

When I heard the door close, I took a step toward Kellan. With no one else in the room, Kellan’s anger and frustration turned solely toward me. I was prepared for it, though; I’d
been on the receiving end of vicious snarls from Kellan more than once. “You gonna call me a pussy too? Think I ought to go ahead and fuck Sienna, just to prove a point?”

I cringed a little, but let it slide off of my back. His anger wasn’t really directed at me. Walking over to him, I grabbed his hands; they were still clenched into fists. “Kellan .
. . you can’t give up now.”

Kellan pried a hand loose and pointed at the door. “Were you in that meeting? Did you hear what they want me to do?”

Grabbing his hand again, I nodded. “Yes, and it’s okay.” Just saying the words made my stomach tighten, but it had to be done.

Kellan gaped at me. “It’s . . . okay? How is me ‘film fucking’ someone okay?”

Stepping into his body, I trailed my fingers up his arms and wrapped them around the back of his neck. He was rigid at first, but he gradually relaxed as I held him. “Well, all right,
maybe ‘okay’ isn’t the best word. The thought of you being with her is actually a little horrifying.” Kellan’s body started to tense again and I immediately told him,
“But it’s a necessary evil.”

Kellan shook his head, his arms wrapping around my waist. “No, it isn’t necessary.” His anger draining, he rested his head against mine. “I don’t want to hurt you.
And I don’t see how any of this won’t hurt you.”

Pulling back from him, I said, “And I don’t want you to give up on your dream because of me.” He shook his head, looking away from me, and I grabbed his cheek.
“You’re so close, so very close. Just do this one thing to jumpstart your career, to jumpstart the guys’ careers. Then, when you’ve completed your contract terms and
you’re the most sought-after band in the industry, find another label.
That
will prove your point much better than . . . you know.”

Kellan smirked at me, and I smiled at seeing some of his humor coming back. But the seriousness in his face returned as he exhaled a long breath. He didn’t say anything for several
seconds. I could see that his mind was churning, debating, and I gave him a moment to process everything that had just been thrown at him. When he did finally speak, his voice was quiet. “I
don’t want to let the guys down, I really don’t, and I see what you’re saying. But when I said I was through with other girls, I meant it. You’re it for me. I don’t
want to touch her.”

Stroking his skin with my thumb, I murmured, “I know. And I love you so much for that. But this doesn’t have to affect us if we don’t let it. You’re still my husband.
I’m still your wife. Acting like you feel differently on camera doesn’t change any of that. Okay?”

Kellan slowly nodded, then sighed. “I’m not even sure if I can film a love scene with someone other than you.”

Running a hand through his still slicked back hair, I husked, “Sure you can. Just pretend she’s me. It wouldn’t be the first time.”

I gave him a wry smile so he would know I was teasing. He gave me a devilish grin in response. His face sobered instantly, though. “You really want me to do this?”

I bit my lip. Did I want this? No. I didn’t want his body anywhere near Sienna’s. But I wanted success for him, and for him to walk away now, over . . .
this
. . . seemed
too great a price for him to pay. I nodded. “Yes, I do.” Kellan closed his eyes, nodding once. I gave him a light kiss, hating that someone else would be touching that miraculous mouth
soon. “And, Kellan”—his eyes cracked opened—“if this is really going to happen, I need to be there. I need to watch it.”

His eyes sprang all the way open. “No.”

I nodded, kissing him again. “I have to, Kellan.”

“Why?” he murmured against my lips. “Why would you want to see that, Kiera?”

Because I’m a glutton for punishment.
“Because it will be so much worse in my head if I don’t.”

“Kiera,” he pleaded. “I don’t want this, but if I have to do it, then I want you as far away from it as possible.” Pushing my shoulder back, he squatted to look me
in the eye. “I don’t want to hurt you, and if our roles were reversed, I couldn’t handle watching you with another man.”

I gave him a sad smile as I whispered, “You already did.”

Kellan’s mouth parted, and a wave of sadness swept over his features. It broke my heart. “I love you,” I told him, bringing my lips to his.

Doing my best to erase his sadness, I tasted his lips over and over. His breath eventually picked up as the passionate fire inside him sparked under my administrations. His hands came up to
tangle in my hair, holding my head tight to his. His tongue passed over mine, teasing me, and a low moan disrupted the stillness of our bedroom. An erotic noise burrowed up from Kellan’s
chest, mixing with my breathy exhales. My impatient hands ran up and under his shirt. I needed all of the barriers between us gone.
Now.

Kellan broke apart from me to help my eager fingers remove his shirt, then instantly sought my lips again once the material was free. I traced the lines and valleys I knew and loved so well. My
fingers found the deep V of his lower abdomen, and I tugged on the waistband of his damp shorts, needing those off as well. Kellan helped me there too, and before I could really comprehend it, he
was standing before me, completely bare and not the least bit self-conscious about it.

His eyes were hooded as mine roved over his body. He was mine, heart and soul. Sienna may have a brief moment with him—a very tiny, tiny, taste—but she would never have the full
magnificence of this stunning man. I almost felt a little sorry for her. Almost.

Breath fast, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him onto the bed. As soon as my back hit the mattress, he started stripping away my clothes. My damp shorts met up with his on the
floor, my tankini briefs immediately following. His hands slid up my sides, taking my top with it, and I groaned when my chest was free. His mouth enclosed a nipple, and I delighted in something I
knew he wouldn’t be able to film with her. Not for a PG-13 music video.

Kellan, also reveling in what was his and his alone, moved my leg up his hip and immediately sank himself into me. I clutched him tight, groaning “Yes” a lot louder than I probably
should have.

Kellan sucked in a breath through his teeth. “God, Kiera . . .” he murmured, before he began to move.

Maybe it was the wildly swinging emotions we’d been experiencing just before this moment, but every cell in my body felt energized, alive, and tingling with sensation. And I didn’t
hold anything back as Kellan and I rocked together. This was ours, and Sienna would never share in it. And even though she was nowhere near us, I let out my joy as if she could hear it.

Kellan did too. And it wasn’t too much longer before we were both approaching the crest, our bodies lightly shaking, slightly damp from the exertion. As my climax burst through me, I raked
my nails down Kellan’s back. Not strong enough to draw blood, but strong enough that he would feel it for a while. My little reminder of who we were and what we’d been through. Kellan
buried his head into my shoulder. He cried out as his body tensed, then released. I groaned as I felt him, heard him, was one with him.

No, Sienna would never have this. Her pale imitation of this moment wouldn’t even come close.

Breath heavy, Kellan rolled to my side. I kissed his cheek and he smiled with his eyes still closed. I watched him as he recovered, mesmerized by him. His smile never faded, but his breathing
slowed and evened. When his face relaxed and his breathing turned shallow, I realized that I’d relaxed him right into sleep. That gave me a strange feeling of euphoria. But then I started
thinking about Wednesday, and my earlier bravado faltered. Maybe Sienna wouldn’t have
this
moment with him, but was I opening a can of worms by giving them a taste of each other? Was
I making a monumental mistake by allowing this to happen?

Stealthily sliding out of bed, I folded the comforter around Kellan so he was covered. After putting on some clean, dry clothes, I picked up Kellan’s phone from his nightstand and silently
left my sleeping husband. When I got back into the main lounging area, I was expecting to see the other D-Bags waiting around to hear what Kellan had to say. But then my mind replayed the last few
moments and I realized that Kellan and I had both been quite vocal, and they probably already knew that I had successfully changed his mind. My cheeks heated, but I ignored the embarrassment. At
least no one had walked in on us this time.

Griffin came out of the community bathroom as I was making my way to the deck. I froze when I saw him, wondering what obscene comment he was going to make. With a look of pride on his face, he
pointed at my closed bedroom door. “Did you just fuck him into submission?” He held his knuckles up to me. “Nice.”

My initial reaction was to scoff, call him a pig, and storm off in a mortified huff. But I’d promised myself that I’d make an attempt to be nice to him, so I shrugged and made myself
talk to him. “I changed his mind about doing the video, but . . . now I’m worried that I made a mistake.”

As Griffin ran a hand through his hair, I realized that this was the first conversation I’d ever really had with him. It was odd, and I had no idea what he would say, or if I would find it
offensive or not.

He made a dismissive sound with his lips. “Nah, don’t worry about it. You guys aren’t into sharing, so he won’t really do anything with her.” He winked at me, and I
strangely found it charming instead of creepy. “Kell knows what side his dick’s buttered on.”

Feeling oddly reassured by his absurd expression, I muttered, “Thank you . . . I think.”

Griffin laughed as he left the room. “Anytime, Kiera.”

Shaking my head, I began to wonder if I’d just entered into some strange sort of opposite world, where I encouraged Kellan to make out with other women and found advice from Griffin
comforting. What else was going to happen? Anna and Denny hook up and decide to get married and raise Griffin’s baby as their own? That made me laugh as I walked outside. No, no way would
those two ever get together. Anna would eat Denny alive.

Palms sweaty, I started pacing near the railing. I had a view of the backyard pool and could see Matt and Evan near the edge, both of them chatting on their cell phones, most likely to Rachel
and Jenny. Probably telling them the exciting news about their music video with Sienna Sexton. Internally groaning, I pulled up Kellan’s contact list and scrolled through until I found
Sienna’s number. Kellan was mine, and I wasn’t just going to roll over and let somebody else nab him from me.

She picked up almost immediately. “Kellan, what a wonderful surprise. What can I do for you, love?”

I bristled at her charming term of endearment, but tried not to think too much of it. She called everyone “love.” “Um, actually, this is Kiera. I’m borrowing
Kellan’s phone.”

“Oh, well, what can I do for you, Kiera?” There was a small trace of disappointment in her accent, but she covered it well with bubbly politeness.

“I just wanted to let you know that I talked Kellan into doing the music video with you,” I said.

She couldn’t hide the disappointment this time. “He didn’t want to do the video?”

I sighed, hating that I had to placate both sides. “He wasn’t okay with the direction the director wanted to take it, filming a love scene with you. But I told him . . . it was
fine.”