Read Reckless Karma (Sinners & Saints #2) Online
Authors: Chelsea Ballinger
Don’t
even get me started on that. Once Patrick received the news that Harper was
going with Fairchild, I wanted to scream and destroy someone. But since the
Rebecca thing and the reappearance of Karlie Dale, I figure I should lay low
when it comes to my side hobbies.
“I’m
sorry things haven’t been working out for you lately.” He looks at me.
“What
about you? How have you been?” That’s so sweet. Even through his mess he still
seeks to know my thoughts and feelings. I guess that’s a part of marriage. I
wouldn’t know.
“Fine,”
I answer and I am.
“What
about this Karlie woman? Something seems off about her. Do you remember her?”
“Not
really. She was an average girl. Smart on scholarship until she overdosed.”
His
eyes widen. “Really?”
“Yeah.
It was crazy when it happened. No one really knows. She was troubled.”
The
overdose was just some silly rumor I made up so people would stop questioning
about Karlie Dale’s disappearance. Everyone believed it like the sheep they
were. Even Noel believed it like a fucking idiot. Karlie Dale never touched any
drugs other than anti depressants.
“What
about your friends? Noel and Chad? If you ask me, when she showed up they
looked as if they were gonna piss themselves.”
I
guess Patrick pays attention more than I thought. I wonder if he ever sees me.
Like the real me. If he does, he doesn’t say anything. I guess that’s
love.
“Well,
I can’t answer that. I don’t know everything Chad and Noel did in high school.
Maybe they hooked up with her?” I suggest.
“Must’ve
been some hook up.”
“I
suppose it was.” I smirk, remembering. “Now…” I kiss him and I work my way back
down to remind him. “Enough about the cruel outside world. As long as you’re
with me… I’ll make all the pain go away.” I feel his heart racing. His dick
hard. His soul mine.
GABRIEL
“You
look handsome,” Scarlett says to me. I look through the mirror in my tux.
“Thank
you,” I say back.
“Where
are you going tonight?”
“I
have to go to this gala for my father.”
“Really?”
She looks at me confused. “You didn’t tell me.”
“Well
you know how insignificant my father’s orders are to me.” I smile. “When he
offered to get me the jet for New Year’s, I couldn’t refuse again.”
“Lovely.”
She snickers and then looks at me longingly. Sometimes I wonder if Scarlett is
actually in love with me. I doubt it, but then again I didn’t expect the recent
event either.
“Ya
know,” she says, “when we first slept together… I thought: Your heart racing.
Your dick hard. Your soul mine.”
“Romantic,”
I joke.
“I’m
serious.”
I
turn around and look at her. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
She comes closer. “I just wondered if you know… how important you are to me. No
man has ever been as important to me as you.”
Her
grey eyes speak the truth even when her lips don’t. This time both of them do.
“Why?”
I ask and she wasn’t expecting me to question her.
“Because…”
Her eyes fall to my chest and her hand covers my heart. “I always know when
this beats for me.” Her eyes lift back up to mine, but they are no longer
loving or sane. They are the usual cunning and threatening irises they consist
to be. “I wouldn’t know what to do if it ever stopped beating for me.”
She
knows. If she doesn’t, she has a feeling. Scarlett is practically a fucking
witch.
I
cover her hand with mine. “Then trust that it will never stop beating for you.”
I clasp my hands around her face and press my lips against hers. Pushing my
tongue through along with the echoing sounds of my heart that I force to beat
for her. Beat harder than ever before because before this they had been hollow
as of late.
She
breaks away still holding my hands. “Sure you need to go? I want you.”
I
kiss her again. “Yeah. I won’t be back until tomorrow, but when I do…” I kiss
her again. “I want you. Only you. All day.”
She
sucks my bottom lip between her teeth and hisses.
“I
guess Noel or Chad can last me until then.” I chuckle.
“Good
girl.” I get ready to leave until it hits me. “I’m sorry,” I say to her.
She
is confused.
“Karlie
Dale. She didn’t bite. It’s been almost five months now. I gave up. The virgin
is a true resilient bitch.”
She
shrugs. “There’s always next year. You both are attending Harvard. I must admit
it is interesting seeing you fail for the first time.”
“Yeah,
well… guess I’m not as good as you.”
“No
man is.”
I
quickly blow her a kiss and head downstairs.
“Going
somewhere, my love?” Ms. Eleanor asks me from the living room once I reach the
foyer.
“A
gala for my father,” I quickly say.
“Oh.”
She nods, her Bloody Mary in hand.
I
begin to head out.
“Gabriel.”
But I’m stopped again. “Be careful with the secrets that you keep. Especially
the secrets of love… secrets of love only leave room for the devil to creep
in.”
Ms.
Eleanor is bat shit crazy but at the same time, a smart woman.
“Dully
noted.” I walk over and give her a kiss on the cheek.
I
leave out and get in the limo. I don’t worry about Scarlett anymore. Me apologizing
for failing with Karlie should throw her off. There will be no room for the
devil to creep in.
It
pulls up just in time. When we were kids, our mother would tell us stories of
first dates. She always said the first real date was the one that would give
great impact to a great love. She asked us once where we would like to take our
first dates. We were kids, so we said a toy store or the zoo. Though she had
said they were all good choices, she said one day we would have to take that
one girl
—
that one girl you knew would make a great impact
—
well,
you would have to take her someplace special. She asked us what that place was.
We didn’t know yet. So Hugo and I agreed. We would take them to the place she
held special, and that was the Metropolitan Opera House. Opera music always
made us sad as children, and when she died we threw away all her records, never
wanting to hear the devastating sounds of trumpets and high screams roam
through our home again without her.
“Maybe
one day we will listen to it again,” Hugo whispered as we lay in our mother’s
bed with August. Not our father’s – he was never there. “Maybe when we go
on first dates.”
“Yeah,”
I had said back.
“Gabriel?”
“Yeah?”
“Do
you think we’ll be like them?”
“No,”
I gritted out. “Never.”
That’s
what I thought, but now I have come to terms with the true meaning of being a
product of your environment. It’s inevitable and the moment you realize it is
the moment you have to come to a decision. Do you stick with it or change it? I
used to think I was changing it, but now I know that I was as stupid as the
rest of us. Now. Now I believe I can change it. With one look from Karlie as
she steps out of the other limo I sent to get her from home. In the dark blue
gown I bought her covered in a coat to protect her from the below freezing New
York weather. Christmas is almost here, but it feels like I see it now in her.
“Hey.”
She smiles as I take her hand.
“You
look beautiful.”
“Just
know I’m giving you back this dress after.”
“Don’t
ruin it with the miss independent speech again. Just enjoy the moment.” She
never lets me give her stuff. I’ve come to accept that no matter how badly I
would like to shower her in gifts.
“I’ve
never really listened to opera before,” she admits.
“I
haven’t listened to it in years and when I did it made me cry. I was a kid.”
She
laughs.
“But,”
I hold my finger up, “tonight I will enjoy it because I’m with you.”
And
I do. Through the sounds of
Amore A Distanza
,
we travel through a story of a peasant boy bewitched by a princess. With one
look he is put to death because of it. Sad shit, isn’t it? But it was funny.
The kid looks at the girl and gets sentenced to death, and hours before his
death, the princess secretly sees him to declare her love for him and they
fuck. Then he dies. That’s the story… and it was fucking awesome. Watching
Karlie lean over the private balcony where we were seated. Her eyes wide and
big, never blinking, enchanted by the tragic yet powerful love story.
“It
was amazing,” she says as we get back outside, going down the steps of the
opera house.
“I
am glad you enjoyed it.”
“What
are you about to do?” she asks me.
“I’m
gonna head home. The limo will take you back.”
She
takes my hand and squeezes it tight. She looks me in the eyes and I can tell
she’s nervous. “I don’t think I want to go home just yet.” She looks back down.
“Actually I told my mom I would be spending the night at a friend’s tonight.”
She looks back up and there it is. The brown eyes that zero in on me and tell
me she’s ready.
“I’m
going to my father’s place. He’s out of town and I didn’t feel like going back
home.”
I
didn’t want to go home and instantly betray Karlie after our first real date.
If I sleep with her, I’m definitely not going to have sex with Scarlett now. I
can’t do this.
“So
you want some company?”
“Yes.”
What the fuck are you doing?
Apparently
what I want to do because what I want is Karlie. I want her so bad that I can
barely stand once we get to my father’s place.
“You
want something to drink?” I ask as I take her coat and toss it on the leather
couch.
“No.”
She looks around the foyer. Sees one family picture of us. “You were cute.”
“I
know.” She rolls her eyes and narrows them at the 3-year-old twins I’m standing
between. Then she looks at my mother. “You look more like your mother in the
eyes and face.”
She’s
right. I have her blue eyes and round face with toned cheekbones, but I don’t
have her blonde hair. I have my father’s black hair. In the sun you can maybe
see a hint of brown on the tips, but it’s mostly black like his. My brothers
have brown hair that used to be blonde when they were kids. My father looks
stern in this picture while my mother just looks sad. She has this smile that
is so faint and hollow. I really don’t know if my mother was ever happy in her
life… even before marrying our father.
“Your
mother was beautiful.” She looks at me, her eyes raking over my face. “Your
eyes are as sad as hers.” Her hand creeps up to my cheek. It almost causes me
to flinch, but the warm pressed hand relaxes me. “Even when you smile they
are.”
“I’m
sorry.”
“You
don’t have to apologize for something you can’t control.” She pulls on my tie
and presses her body against mine. “Yet.” Without telling each other to do so,
we tilt our heads toward each other, bringing our lips and tongues together.
Savoring this moment. This night. I think this night will be the best night of
my life.
“We
don’t have to do this. I’m okay with just holding you,” I warn her. I give her
a way out before it’s too late.
“I
want you to do more than just hold me,” she whispers across my lips before
kissing me again. I avoid caution and wrap one arm around her lower back and
dip down, lifting her up with my arm under her legs. I don’t break the kiss as
I take her to the spare bedroom that is considered to be my room even though it
has nothing that represents me. I only see it as a room. A room that has now
been decorated with the presence of her.
I
sit her down on the bed. She kicks off her heels and pushes off my jacket. I
reach over and unzip her dress. I pull it by the straps. She lifts her hips so
I can pull it all the way down to her feet. She’s wearing a white laced bra and
panties. Still squatted down, I smile and laugh a little to myself.
“You
planned this, didn’t you? No woman wears matching white bra and panties.”