Reclaimed (Hostage Rescue Team Series Book 10) (6 page)

Bauer shot their team leader a worried look before focusing back on Adam, his bright blue gaze intense, his huge frame practically vibrating with unease. “You’re probably not hungry now but I’m gonna go grab you something anyway, in case you feel like eating later.”

Adam shook his head sharply. “No, don’t bother.” If he tried to force anything down his throat right now he’d just puke it up, and he didn’t see that improving no matter how hungry he got.

Thankfully neither of them bothered arguing or trying to reason with him. He didn’t want to talk, didn’t want company right now, not even if the guys had good intentions. He just wanted the right to lose his shit in private. But maybe DeLuca had ordered them to watch him.

Tuck lowered himself into the armchair nearby and leaned forward, forearms resting on his knees. His dark brown eyes held Adam’s, unwavering. “We’ve got the best in the business looking for her. The director’s personally overseeing it. They’re all working on it right now, checking satellites and whatever HUMINT they can gather. They’ll be working on it 24/7 until they get a location. Then we’ll go get her back. Every one of us is ready to go out there and do whatever it takes to rescue her.”

Adam made himself nod, but he wasn’t really listening. He was too caught up in his own emotional chaos, trying to figure out where she might be.

As a high value captive, there had to be some higher purpose for the ATB taking her. They’d want to use her for leverage, exploit the situation to their advantage. Money, prisoner exchanges, media attention.

Surely if they’d wanted her dead they just would have killed her during the ambush. And they’d taken two others as well.

Except he didn’t feel reassured by that logic at all. He knew what those barbaric assholes were capable of.

“We’re here for you, okay?” Tuck said, his Alabama drawl soft in the quiet room. “Just want you to know that. If you need something, you name it and we’ll make sure it happens.”

“Thanks,” he forced out, not wanting to be a dick. He appreciated his teammates’ concern, but the fact was, nothing they or anyone else could do would make him feel better until Summer was back safe and sound.

When neither Bauer nor Tuck said anything else, just sat there watching him with identical worried expressions, Adam sighed and scrubbed his hands over his face. He hadn’t planned on talking to anyone, and he knew they’d leave if he told them to but if they were staying, so be it.

“We were supposed to go out on a date earlier,” he said, his voice rough. “I told her I’d pick her up at six at her hotel.” Instead she was now a hostage, somewhere he couldn’t find her, afraid, maybe hurt. It sliced at his heart like a razor blade.

A heavy silence spread in the wake of his words, Bauer shifting uncomfortably in his seat. As the grimmest member of the team, this was likely way out of his comfort zone. It said a lot about his character that he was staying. “Yeah, you mentioned that earlier.”

Nobody said anything for a long, awkward minute and Adam’s thoughts turned to the past. “Things were getting better between us over the past couple months,” he said finally. “And then today she…told me she still loved me.” He choked up at that, pressed a fist against his lips to hold back the sob trapped in his throat. He couldn’t decide if he even wanted to tell them all this, or if he wanted them gone.

“Glad to hear that, man,” Tuck murmured.

Adam nodded, staring at the beige carpet at his feet. He swallowed. “All this time, that’s what I’d been dying to hear. I knew if she still loved me, we could get through anything. And a few minutes after she told me, she was gone.”

Fuck.
He jammed his fingertips against his closed eyelids, fought back the tears burning the backs of his eyes.

“We’re gonna get her back,” Tuck said quietly, his voice full of steel. “There’s no way we’re not getting her back.”

He looked up, met Tuck’s deep brown stare as anger ignited.
And what if we don’t?

He bit the words back, along with the urge to shout them. Snapping at his team leader wasn’t going to improve the situation and Tuck was just trying to help. It was clear they were both worried about him.

Adam looked back down at the floor. He wasn’t really that close with any of them, yet they all had his back.

That was the part he’d missed most about being with the team—that unshakable bond and camaraderie that came with knowing every last guy on the team would take a bullet for any of them. And they’d all been through their own private hells too, when the women they loved were in peril.

Tuck and Celida hadn’t been officially together when she’d been attacked, but everyone had known he’d had strong feelings for her. And Bauer, hell, Zoe had gone through it twice.

Adam shook his head. “How did you guys handle it when they were taken? Zoe and Celida.”

Bauer and Tuck looked at each other for a moment before facing him. “It was tough,” Bauer answered, his blue eyes somber. “Toughest thing I’ve ever gone through. So I know how you’re feeling, I get it. And like Tuck said, remember we’ve all got your back through this.”

Adam knew all that. He cleared his throat, thought of something to say to fill the pause. He’d been careful not to let anyone know the extent of the deterioration of his marriage or the reasons behind it, but fuck it. These were his brothers and he knew they wouldn’t judge him.

“We’d been having problems for about two years now.” Bauer and his wife were expecting a baby in a few months so this topic of conversation probably wasn’t all that welcome, but he didn’t know what the hell else to talk about and he’d held everything in for so long.

He drew in a deep breath. “We lost a baby.” It was such a relief to say it aloud.

A shocked silence filled the room. He didn’t look at the others.

“Well, three of them, to be honest. We’d been trying to get pregnant for over a year and nothing happened. Eventually we had to resort to IVF. We lost the first one pretty early on. But the second one was…” He pressed his lips together, fought the sudden constriction in his throat. “It was tough.” He risked a look up, saw Bauer staring at him with the kind of sudden awareness only another expectant father could have.

“Shit, man, I never knew. I’m sorry.”

“Me too,” Tuck added.

Adam nodded. “Thanks. I just didn’t want to talk about it with anyone back then.” Which, as it turned out, was the main reason things had gone from bad to worse between him and Summer. “We were at that training thing in San Diego when it happened. I flew home as soon as I got the news but the truth is, I…wasn’t there for her afterward. Not like I should have been.” He’d been upset too, of course, but now he recognized not in the same way she’d been.

When he thought of his lack of communication and impatience with her in the aftermath, he wanted to go back in time and deliver a throat punch to himself.

It still crushed him, shamed him to know he hadn’t been there for her in her darkest hour. Not in the way she’d needed him to be. He hadn’t understood that until a few months ago, until she’d moved out and been ready to sign the separation papers she’d had drawn up.

He didn’t blame her for wanting out. And even though he didn’t know what she’d been through on that horrible day, he could guess well enough. He’d tortured himself with it ever since.

You don’t know what it was like. You weren’t
there
. You were
never
there.

The memory of Summer’s emotional accusation reverberated in his skull, wrapped around his ribcage like a python and squeezed.

He blew out an unsteady breath. “I swore to her I’d never let her down like that again. I promised I’d always be there for her after that.” And now, when she needed him more than ever and was facing the unthinkable at the hands of those animals, he wasn’t there.

He. Wasn’t. There.

He shook his head, refusing to accept it. “I’ve gotta find her. I can’t lose her or I’ll—” His throat closed up.

Tuck got up and came over to lay a hand on his shoulder, his big hand gripping tight. “We’ll find her. And we’ll bring her home safe and sound.”

On the verge of losing it, Adam dropped his face into his hands and sent out a silent prayer. A vow he’d die trying to uphold.

I wasn’t there for you before. And it’s true that I don’t know what you went through back then. But I love you and I’m not giving up. So wherever you are right now, Summer, please hold on. I won’t stop searching until I find you.

****

Eight years ago

The past week had crawled by for Summer with agonizing sluggishness, but she’d been looking forward to this for days and now it was finally time.

She checked her reflection in the bathroom mirror one last time before heading out into her bedroom where she had her laptop waiting on the bed. That familiar sense of excitement and anticipation built as she logged onto her Skype account and waited cross-legged atop her quilt.

Adam had told her he’d call between seven and eight her time tonight, unless he got called out for a mission or briefing. The last two times they’d tried to schedule this he hadn’t been able to make it. Not seeing or talking to him was slowly driving her insane.

She worried about him and his buddies. Normally she stopped watching the news in an effort to avoid seeing the terrible things happening in the area Adam was stationed, but that didn’t help much because she got more than ample information about what was going on in southern Afghanistan at work. Sometimes ignorance really was bliss.

Her pulse jumped when the call came in. She answered it, and a moment later Adam’s face appeared on the screen. Her cheeks ached from the wide smile that stretched her mouth. He smiled back, the adoration and pleasure on his face making her heart roll over in her chest. “Hey, doll.”

She loved it when he called her that. “Hey, handsome. How are you?” God, he looked good. Tired, but good. She missed him so much it hurt.

“Great. Sorry I couldn’t do this sooner. We’ve been busy.”

She waved the apology away. “It’s okay. Just glad to see you safe and sound.”

“Yep, all’s good here. How are things there?”

“Good. I’ve been working long hours.” Taking on extra projects and helping her boss with a few things outside of her normal work load. Mostly in an effort to distract herself and make the time go faster. Right now she was analyzing intelligence reports on an up-and-coming faction in Lebanon. “I’m counting down the days until you get back.”

“Me too. Nineteen more and I’ll be there.”

She couldn’t wait. “You get any sleep today?” It didn’t look like it to her and they routinely went without sleep for two days at a time when they were out on patrol or a mission.

“Yeah, just woke up.”

He couldn’t talk about the missions he and his A-Team were running, but he knew she was more aware than most of what was happening in his area. He’d tell her more when he got home, all except the classified stuff. She had a security clearance but it was far lower than his. Still, she liked that he shared certain things with her and didn’t try to shelter her from what had happened.

They talked about her work for a while, and the whole time she was scoping out the situation on the other end. There didn’t seem to be anyone else in the room with him. “Where is everyone?” Normally at their forward operating base barracks he bunked with four other guys.

“I sent them out for a while.”

“Did you?” she said suggestively. “Why, were you planning on talking dirty to me?”

He cracked a grin, gave a mock frown. “I would never do such a thing.”

Oh yeah, he would. And hearing the sexy things he told her in that deep voice sent a shiver through her now.

Placing the laptop down before her on the bed, she flipped her hair over one shoulder, exposing the front of her. “I bought something for you today.”

“Did you?” He was eyeing her cleavage now, pushed up and revealed to maximum effect in the plunging V neckline of the purple halter-top blouse she’d chosen. And what she had on underneath it.

“Mmmm. Wanna see?”

He cocked a dark eyebrow. “That a trick question?”

Smirking, she reached up behind her neck and plucked the button closure of the top apart. Watching his face, she held onto the ends of both straps for a moment, then slowly lowered them.

Adam let out a low groan and leaned closer when he saw the black lace push-up bra she’d bought. It had little crystal skulls on the center of each cup and a little pink bow nestled between them. “Holy shit.”

Laughing softly, she shook her hair back and thrust her chest upward, shoving her amped-up cleavage at the camera. “Just wanted to give you a preview of what to expect when you get home. I’ve been busy beefing up my lingerie wardrobe.”

“Take it off.” The low command, coupled with that hungry, focused expression, made warmth spread deep in her abdomen.

Instead she teased him by drawing a finger alongside one of the cups, tracing the edge of the fabric as it cupped her breast, following it down to pause at the little pink bow. “But it’s so pretty,” she protested. She loved teasing him like this. Loved that he still wanted her so much, even after all this time together.

“Do it,” he coaxed, his ice-blue eyes hot on her skin.

Hiding a smile, she reached back and unhooked the fastening between her shoulder blades. She drew the left strap down her shoulder and upper arm, slowly, letting it dangle at the bend of her elbow. Then the right one. He wasn’t moving at all, his full attention riveted to her still-covered breasts.

Her nipples were already hard points against the fabric, tendrils of pleasure and heat cascading out from there to between her thighs. Watching his expression, she lowered her arms and let the bra drop into her lap.

His answering groan rumbled through her laptop. “Oh God…”

Oh yeah, she loved that look on his face. The one that said if he’d been in front of her right now, she’d be flat on her back with his mouth on her in less than a second.

Feeling sexy as hell, Summer lifted her arms and gathered her hair up behind her, striking her best pinup pose. Adam’s stare looked like it might burn through the monitor as he took it all in.