Redemption Road (Roughneck #3) (7 page)

Chapter 12

A noise coming from the kitchen startled me, and woke me from my sleep. I grabbed my phone. It was 4:00 a.m. My heart was pounding out of control, and I had to force myself to calm down, remembering that Kash was back in town. Then the smell of coffee hit my nose and my mouth started to water. It smelled like heaven. But it was 4 in the morning, I can’t imagine why he would be up so early. Plus, I didn’t have to be at work for another five hours. I tried to go back to sleep, but it wasn’t happening. When I looked at my phone again, it was 4:30, and I decided to get up. I didn’t want things to be awkward between us after last night. I was an adult, and I could handle this. At least I could pretend I could. So, I hopped out of bed, ran a brush through my hair, and put a bra on. I didn’t need them demanding attention right now.

There he was, standing at the coffee pot, with his back to me. He was wearing a pair of black boxers and his hair was a perfect mess. Was it possible to die of lust? Because I was headed down that road, fast.

“You’re up early,” I said quietly, as I walked up beside him. I started to grab a cup from the cabinet in front of me, but Kash handed me a cup as I started to reach. I stared at him, with a confused look, I’m sure.

“I was hoping you would wake up,” he said, as he scooted over so I could pour myself a cup.

“Are you always up this early?” I asked, as I poured my coffee.

“Nah, my sleep schedule is just always fucked up my first couple of days home,” he said, as he took the cup from my hand and eyed the sugar as he held up a spoon.

“One sugar, two creams, thanks,” I said, trying to hide the giddy smile that was threatening to bust through.

We sat at the kitchen table in silence for a few minutes before Kash cleared his throat.

“I kind of wanted to talk to you about something,” he said with a serious look. Oh, no. I wasn’t ready to talk about last night. I wasn’t ready for him to tell me it was a mistake. I also wasn’t ready for him to tell me it was just sex and it didn’t mean anything. Damn it.

“Ok,” I said, trying to sound casual. The past couple of years I have been really good at hiding my feelings, but it was almost impossible with Kash.

“Look, I know your ex is a dick. But, I don’t really know a lot of details. But, I think I need to know what we’re up against.” He said, as he bit the inside of his cheek.

We?

“He’s a jerk, but I can handle him. Don’t worry about it,” I said, lying through my teeth, and from the look on his face, he knew it.

“He’s more than a jerk, sweetie. He hit you didn’t he?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said quietly, and stared into my cup.

I peeked up at him, and saw that his jaw was flinching.

“What else? I know there’s more,” he said.

“Just douche bag stuff, Kash. I really don’t want to talk about him,” I said. Honestly, I didn’t want Kash to know how pathetic I was for staying with him for so long.

“The reason I’m asking is because I heard a car outside around three this morning. It was already leaving by the time I looked out my window. But, I still went outside and there was something left on the porch.”

“Shit,” I mumbled. “What now?” I asked.

“I cleaned it up,” he said. “This dude seems a little off, Mackenzie. He broke into the house and stole all your clothes. That’s completely fucked up and makes no sense to me.”

I realized that Kash was holding back what he found this morning; I wasn’t even sure I wanted to know.

“I depended on him for a long time, and I guess he thought if I couldn’t work, I would have to come back to him.”

“You can’t go back to him. Ever,” he said, very seriously, as he stared into my eyes.

God, he was beautiful when he was serious. He was beautiful when he was turned on. He was beautiful when he slept. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.  His lips crashing into mine broke my thoughts.

“Promise me you won’t ever go back,” he said with his lips still against mine, but parted just enough to get the words out.

“I can’t go back. I wouldn’t,” I said against his lips.

He kissed me once again and then pulled away, got up from the table, and walked to the bar.

He kept his back to me, but let out a loud exhale. I realized this was our new habit. He would show me some affection, and then pull away. I didn’t understand it, but in a way it worked for me. Because I sure wasn’t ready to jump into a relationship, it would just make dealing with Jake even harder. But I loved the way he made me feel when he touched me. He gave me a peaceful feeling that I’m not sure I had ever known. And, maybe I was just vulnerable. Or maybe I was just in lust, I don’t know. But either way, I liked Kash and I couldn’t deny it.

“Can we talk about something else?” I asked, as I stood up. I walked in his direction. Everything in me wanted to wrap my arms around his waist and hold him close to me. But instead, I just ran my finger horizontally down the tattoo on his back. I watched as chill bumps spread all over his back. At my touch. That made me smile.

“Sure,” he said, as he spun around, walked passed me slowly and sat back down at the table. To say I was a little disappointed would be an understatement.

“So what brought you to Bailey? Sam said you were living a few towns over?” I asked, as I picked up my cup of coffee and took a sip.

“Uh, I did something stupid,” he said with a little laugh.

“Oh yeah? What’d you do?” I asked with a smile.

“Oh. You really don’t wanna know,” he said with that cocky grin, and leaned closer and tapped my nose with his finger.

“You’re not running from the cops are ya?” I asked with a giggle.

Kash just cocked his eyebrow and remained silent for a second.

“Not in the way you think,” he laughed.

Well, that statement made me more than just a little curious, but I didn’t want to pry, so I just stared him down instead.

“Let’s just say I’m not proud of some of the things I’ve done in the past,” Kash said.

“Well, that makes two of us,” I said, and nodded my head.

“So, tell me more about you,” Kash said. “Brothers or sisters?”

Oh, no. Another subject I wasn’t ready to tackle.

“I’m an only child,” I said. “What about you?”

“I have two brothers, they’re both older.”

“Ah, you’re the baby,” I said with a wink.

“I guess you could say that. They’re both married with kids, got the suit and tie jobs. Made my momma happy,” he said with a smile.

“Not for you, huh?” I asked.

“I ain’t wearing a suit unless it’s to my own funeral,” he said, as he sipped his coffee.

“What you wear suits you just fine,” I said with a smile. Was I flirting? I wasn’t sure. I had never really done it before, so it was hard to say.

“Works both ways, sweetie,” he said, and gave me a wink that almost melted me into my chair.

“Are you close to your parents?” he asked. Shit.

“Um, no. I don’t speak to them anymore. Wait, let me rephrase that. They don’t speak to me,” I said with a pitiful smile.

“Why not?” he asked.

“I’m the black sheep, I guess you could say. I wasn’t a saint, so they cut ties with me.”

“Well, I know a little something about being the black sheep,” he said.

“Because you don’t do the suit and tie?” I asked.

“Among other things,” he said.

“Well, maybe we’ll get along just fine,” I said.

“I think you might be right,” he said, as he stood up. He leaned down and pecked me on the lips.

I just sat there, completely still. Waiting.

“I’m gonna try and get some sleep. You should try and do the same,” he said, as he walked past me towards his bedroom.

Yeah, like that was going to happen. I waited until I heard his bedroom door close, then I stood and headed back to my bedroom. Alone. Damn it.

Chapter 13

I was exhausted on the way home from work that evening. Being up since four in the morning will do that to you, I guess. As I pulled into the empty driveway, my stomach sank a little. I really needed to get a grip. But, I couldn’t help it. Kash had been on my mind all day, and I just wanted to see his face. I couldn’t really explain what was going on with us, but I knew it was more than just physical attraction.

As I got out of the car, I looked around, which really pissed me off. I was sick of feeling like I was being watched all the damn time. I was sick of feeling like Jake was lurking around every corner. This reminded me that he was here this morning. I didn’t want to ask Kash what he left behind, but I was curious as to what he pulled this time. It seemed to worry Kash, though; I could tell by his reaction. The hate that I felt for Jake was amplified by the day. I just wanted him to go away.

I laid in bed that night, restless, tossing and turning. Waiting. I tried not to think about where Kash was. Or who he was with. But I couldn’t help it. The thought of him being with someone else made me sick to my stomach. But this really wasn’t anything new, I’ve wanted him every day since the first time he touched me, months ago. But things were finally getting somewhere, and I wanted him in my bed. Period.

When I heard the roar of his engine pull into the driveway, the butterflies started up. My typical Kash reaction. I listened for the door opening and the beeping of the alarm resetting. Then I listened for the shower to start, or rustling in the kitchen, but didn’t hear any of that. What I did hear was a light tap on my door.

“Come in,” I said quietly.

“Did I wake you?” he said quietly, with a little slur.

“No,” I said.

“Good,” he whispered, as he crawled in bed next to me, wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed my forehead.

This was a first.

“You feel so fucking good” he said.

“Are you drunk?” I asked with a giggle. Not that I was complaining about the affection he was showing me.

“A little,” he said into my neck, and his hot breath gave me goose bumps.

“I just want to lay next to you,” he said, as he scooted into me. I could feel the bulge in his jeans twitch as he snuggled against me.

“That’s it?” I said with a laugh, as I rubbed against him. I didn’t want to deny myself anymore. It would drive me insane if I tried.

“Well no,” he said, as he wrapped his leg around mine.

I grabbed the sides of his face with my hands and slammed my lips against his. He rolled over on his back, and I crawled on top of him. He grabbed my ass cheeks and squeezed them hard as he moaned into my mouth. My mind started to imagine the way that piercing would feel inside me again. It was mind blowing, and I needed it again. I found myself grinding into him, craving it.

Kash grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head.

“So fucking sexy,” he said as he squeezed my breasts, and then started to suck them. I started to cry out from the pressure between my thighs.

“I need you to fuck me, Kash,” I said, shocking myself at the words that just came out of my mouth. But it was the truth.

Kash froze, grabbed the side of my face, and pulled me down so I was eye level with him.

“What’d you say?” he said with those deep eyes piercing through me.

“Fuck me, please,” I said with a little less authority.

“Sweetie, I would never fucking deny you. I couldn’t if I wanted to,” he said, as he flipped me over on my back and climbed on me, pulling my panties down. He grabbed them in his hands and then inhaled them with a quiet moan before he threw them, and then unzipped his jeans.

He put one finger inside me, and then immediately pulled it out and sucked it dry.

“So fucking sweet,” he whispered, as he put two fingers inside me, and then smiled as I started to buck into his hand.

But, I wanted to taste him. I had always dreaded giving blow jobs before, but this was something I almost needed to do. So I reached my hand down and started to stroke him, running my index finger lightly over the metal bar.

“Fuck,” he groaned, as he gently grabbed the back of my hair and gave it a tug. I started to pull his pants down with my free hand, but had to ask the question that was weighing on me before this went any further.

“Kash?” I whispered.

“Yeah?” he said through ragged breaths

I didn’t want to ask, but I had to.

“Have you been with anyone else today?” I asked, knowing this was probably ruining the entire mood, but I had to know. The thought of him being with someone else bothered me. But taking him in my mouth, knowing it had been inside another woman, would make me vomit.

“What?” he asked, staring into my eyes.

“I…I’m sorry…I just need to know,” I stammered, as I put my face into his chest, unable to handle his piercing eyes, but then I looked back at him, because I couldn’t handle not seeing him all at the same time.

“No. I haven’t,” he said. His eyes showed a little hurt for a split second, but it was gone just as quick. “I would never do that, not to you, Mackenzie,” he said, and then pulled me up to his face and kissed me.

Oh, thank God. I couldn’t handle it if he had told me otherwise. And I believed him.

“I’m sorry, I just had to know. You’ve been gone, I wasn’t sure…” I babbled.

“Shh,” he said with a grin, as he kissed me again. “Stop talking,” he said and bit my bottom lip.

“Ok,” I giggled, and then started to kiss his chest, and made my way down to the spot I was so anxious to taste.

I put his cock in my mouth and touched the metal bar with the tip of my tongue. It was cold compared to the rest of him. I started to run my tongue from the bottom of his shaft to the tip and began to run my tongue around the bar in tiny circles. I was fascinated by it.

“Holy fucking shit, Mackenzie!” he said loudly, as he threw his head back on the pillow and grabbed the back of my head. He didn’t push my head down, he just massaged my scalp and it made me want to take more of him.

After a few minutes, I felt his whole body tense up and he forced me to be still with his hands.

“Get up here,” he said, as he grabbed a condom out of his jeans.

He slid it on quickly, and then slammed me down on top of him. I rode him slow and hard as he rubbed my clit with the pad of his thumb. Both of our orgasms took over at the same time, and it was a good thing there weren’t neighbors close by. Because it was loud, and I’m pretty sure a picture fell off the wall. It was amazing. Afterwards, he pulled me on top of him and I pressed my body against his, enjoying the closeness.

I must have drifted off to sleep, because when I woke up the sun was just coming up. And there I was, naked and alone. I guess I slept so hard that I didn’t even feel him get out of bed. I tried not be a baby about it. I was an adult, I could handle this, even if it was just a fuck buddy thing. I could handle it. I would just have to keep telling myself that until I believed it.