Redemption Song (35 page)

Remaining on his concrete perch, Josh called out, “Before we get started, I need to know if Cameron Crawford is here.”

Alaina glanced up at Cam with surprise.

Cam grabbed hold of Alaina’s hand and led her toward the front of the group of campus tourists. “It’s just Cam, actually,” he said, holding his free hand out for the boy to shake. “Sorry, I was running a little behind.”

Josh smiled a full mouth of teeth. “Cam, we’ve been expecting you! Nice accent, man. On behalf of Sigma Lambda Beta, I would like to offer you a special welcome and a VIP position in the front of the line.”

Alaina nudged Cam in the ribs. “What’s going on?” she muttered.

Cam thanked the frat boy and as they departed. Following closely behind Josh, Cam leaned down near Alaina’s ear. “I told you I was invited to tour the campus.”

“You were invited by a fraternity? Is that normal policy? I thought those were kind of closed off groups, like you had to get voted in or something?”

Cam gave a wink. “Not when you’re a legacy.”

“Legacy, as in . . . already a member?” Alaina said. “How is that possible?”

“My dad. He went to school here. Grew up in New York, in fact. He met my mom at some kind of Greek-life National Conference, or something like that. His job eventually took them to Fairhope a few years before I was born.”

“I’m starting to think there’s a lot about you I don’t know,” Alaina said thoughtfully.

Cam grinned, wrapped his arm around her shoulder, and gave her a tight squeeze as they continued to follow behind Josh.

“Yeah, it’s kind of sexy in a mysterious sort of way, don’t you think?” His grin turned mischievous and he fluttered his eyebrows.

Alaina snorted. “Whatever you say, wannabe frat boy. I was thinking it’s more alarming in an I’m-alone-in-New York City-with-a-boy-I-hardly-know sort of way.”

Cam laughed and turned his attention back toward Josh’s riveting tour guide speech. Josh was waving with excitement from one direction to another, giving random historical facts about each building. Up ahead, a building dedicated strictly to the study of Engineering. Another geared to Nursing and Physical Therapy. One for Science and another for Mathematics. Others for the study of the Arts and History.

Alaina tried to stay focused, but there was something gnawing at her concentration. Cam had been acting a little different ever since they’d arrived in New York. First, with the failed attempt to get a single room with a single bed for them to sleep in. Now, with the blatant flirtation and the constantly touching her . . . Alaina wondered if Cam was starting to get the wrong idea about their relationship. She’d allowed herself to get pretty close to Cam over the past few months when she needed his support. They hugged and he held her and occasionally gave her the supportive kiss on the forehead. But that’s always where things ended and she thought he was okay with that. They were just friends, after all. Weren’t they?

The traditional campus tour lasted for a total of two hours. Cam and Alaina followed Josh like leashed puppy dogs as he walked every square inch of campus and ducked inside some of the most frequented buildings, making certain to "Oooh" and "Ahhh" at all of the appropriate times. But then, after all of the other tour guests had left, Josh—who had seemed to be talking directly to Cam the entire morning—took Cam by the arm and led him around to parts of the campus not included in the previous tour. Alaina followed behind as Josh talked up every single little attribute of CUNY as if there was no better campus on earth, and she laughed to herself as Cam ate up every single word. It was around lunch time when Josh finally came to a halt at their original starting point in front of the flagpole.

“Hey, man, let’s go check out the frat house,” Josh said with a eager smile, slapping Cam on the shoulder as if they were old friends by now. “You can see where you’ll be staying if you choose to go to school here. I’ll introduce you to some of the guys. It’s not normal practice, but you can even bring your girlfriend along. We usually don’t let just anyone see the headquarters, but she seems pretty cool.”

“Cam and I are just friends, actually.” Alaina was quick to jump in. She wanted to add to Josh that she didn’t appreciate the way he’d ran his eyes up and down her body when he’d said the words ‘pretty cool’, but chose to just keep her mouth shut out of respect for Cam. “Besides, Cam and I have a plane to catch this afternoon so . . .”

“Alaina,” Cam interrupted hastily, “our plane doesn’t leave for several hours. We have plenty of time.”

“Yeah, but . . .” Alaina went to interject, but Cam already had his wallet out and was pilfering through a stack of bills in the leather pocket. He pulled out a twenty and shoved it toward her.

“Here, go get some lunch and I’ll meet back up with you in an hour or so. Check out the campus.” He came closer to her, blocking Josh from their conversation. “Remember, this is your adventure, too. Go check out the stuff you’re interested in. See if this could be something you’d consider for your future.”

Alaina gave a frustrated sigh but didn’t protest. “Okay, fine, but seriously, Cam. I don’t want to miss that plane.”

“You worry too much!” Cam grinned and took off after Josh, leaving Alaina alone by the flagpole.

Alaina turned in circles trying to remember which direction they’d gone earlier to get to the Student Center. After about half an hour and three wrong buildings, she finally figured it out. She entered the cafeteria, purchased a sub sandwich and a Coke, and found an unoccupied booth in be back corner. Little flat screen televisions were mounted in every corner of the vast dining hall, and played some kind of University music station. None of the music was any that Alaina had ever heard. She only listened to Christian music, but after giving it a little thought, she realized that she hadn’t really even listened to that lately.

Truthfully, since Ben’s death, Alaina hadn’t done much of anything, period. She never watched TV. Never listened to the radio. She just lived in her own depressed little bubble. Tears welled in her eyes as she realized how much Ben would hate that. Suddenly, she felt as if she’d let him down a little. She looked back up to the television. On the screen was some blonde girl dressed in a strange pink and black poke-a-dotted outfit that could just as easily have been designed for a baby doll. Her eyes were lined in dark shadow and thick liner that curled up her temples in a spiral. She sang a pop song with a dark undertone, and at some point Alaina realized that she wasn’t even sure what the girl was singing about. Her mind wondered back to one of the first conversations she’d ever held with Ethan. She’d told him that he was so talented and it was a waste to use his talent to sing songs that had no real meaning. He could make a difference with his voice. She wondered if Ethan was ever on this channel, dressed up in strange costumes, singing songs that didn’t mean anything. She wondered where he was now. Surely his tour was over by now. She hadn’t bothered to check online. Somehow, it would just make his leaving a permanent finality.

Alaina gave up on finishing her sandwich and rose from the table. Cam might have just been trying to get her out of his hair so that he could go hang out with the boys when he’d told her to check out the campus, but she had to admit that he was right about one thing. She had to start living her life and there was no better time to start than now. So with that thought, Alaina exited the Student Center and took a walk across campus—this time vowing to look at it with fresh eyes of optimism and possibility. Her life was moving on without her, and it was time she caught up to it.

By mid-afternoon, Alaina had revisited all the main buildings on campus, vowing to keep her mind open to the possibilities of one day pursuing a college education of her own. Her main concern, of course, would be the financial aspect of the endeavor, but after a short visit to the financial aid office, and a brief discussion with one of the financial advisors there, Alaina learned that with her present situation she qualified for more grants than she needed to fully cover all of her tuition, fees, and books. The college option was officially on the table for her. All she had to do was decide whether or not to go after it.

It wasn’t until the sun began to set behind the towering buildings, and a cool shadow stretched out over the college grounds, that Alaina remembered to check the time. She pulled out her cell phone. The time was 4:30. Their plane would depart in half an hour! There was no way to get from UCNY to LaGuardia in that amount of time. Not even going the pace the cab had brought them in the previous day. Not to mention, their luggage was still in the holding room at their hotel. What were they going to do? Alaina flipped open her phone and went straight to Cam’s number on speed dial. He answered in a tone that was much more relaxed than her own.

“What’s up, Alaina? Having fun?”

“Cam, we're about to miss our flight! I just looked at the time. The plane leaves in thirty minutes!”

His reply was just as calm as his greeting. “I know. Don’t worry about it. I already called and canceled it anyway.”

“You did what?”

He continued as if she’d said nothing. “And I called the hotel. They’re going to hold onto our luggage for a while longer. I’m over at the frat house. Josh invited us to stay for a grill-out. Come on over and meet me. Do you know how to get here?”

Alaina gave a frustrated sigh. The last thing she cared about right now was grilling hotdogs at a fraternity house. “Cam, how could you have called and canceled our flight without telling me?”

“Alaina, chill out, okay.” She could tell Cam was moving away from the group of chattering voices in the background. “Like I said before, you worry too much. Planes fly out all the time. We’ll just catch another one. It’s not like you have anything severely pressing to get home to, anyway. Now come on over here and have some fun with us. These guys are great! You’ll love them!”

Somehow, Alaina highly doubted that, but seeing as she had no other option, and technically, this was partially her own fault for forgetting to check the time, she sighed and gave up. Flicking her phone shut, she stomped off in the direction of fraternity row. Now if she could only remember the Greek letters on Josh’s shirt, she might be able to figure out which house to go to.

Once Alina reached fraternity row, she was surprised to find that all of the houses looked exactly the same. In the end, unable to identify Josh’s house, she had to call Cam and have him walk her there over the phone. At first sight of fraternity row, Alaina wondered if it was always customary practice for five hundred twenty-somethings to be congregated in the middle of the street on a Tuesday afternoon. Coincidentally, Josh’s fraternity, Sigma something Beta, was not the only one who’d had the idea to grill. It seemed that every fraternity on the block was outside serving up everything from hotdogs to T-bones. Ten minutes into the chaotic crowd, Alaina finally found Cam leaned back lazily in a lawn chair surrounded by fifteen or so other boys who were doing the exact same thing. Girls roamed all over the place. Alaina guessed they belonged to the corresponding sororities on campus. Upon viewing their attire, she instantly felt underdressed. These girls wore skirts or dressy shorts that rode mere centimeters from the very top of their thighs. In fact, Alaina was fairly certain that she owned underwear longer than some of those shorts. Their makeup appeared to have been painted on with a spray gun. And their hair—whether it be bleach blonde, brunette, jet black, or streaked multi-colored—stood in perfect formation on top of each of their heads. Alaina glanced down quickly at her own customary jeans, tank top, and Converse attire. Her hair hung low below her shoulders and flowed there freely, absent of any product whatsoever. And she was pretty certain that the dab of eye shadow and mascara she’d applied earlier that morning had completely worn off at that point.

But to the boys around Cam, her appearance didn’t seem to matter a whole lot. They all looked at her, running their eyes up and down her body the same way Josh had earlier, and frankly, it gave her the creeps. And to top matters off, Cam grabbed hold of her hand as she approached and swung her onto his lap so that she’d have a place to sit.

“Guys, this is my . . . friend . . . Alaina,” Cam said with a grin.

“Your friend, huh, man?” A guy a few chairs down snickered and took a drink of something from a red solo cup. “I wish I had friends like that.”

Alaina had no idea what the guy was talking about but she rose from Cam’s leg as abruptly as she’d fallen to it. “Have you called the airport back yet? When’s the next available flight?”

Cam seemed a bit annoyed, but smiled to cover it up. “Alaina, when are you going to stop worrying?”

“Cam, get up for a second. We need to talk.”

“Whoa-ho-ho!” The boy with the cup called out. “You better go man, she looks serious!”

Alaina flashed the guy a dirty look and then directed it toward Cam. He arose slowly, and it was then that she noticed he also had a red cup in the holder of his chair. She really hoped that it contained soda or they were going to have bigger problems than merely missing their flight.

“What’s going on with you?” she asked, once they were the most alone as was possible in the crowd of people. “We’ve done the tour thing, Cam. You’ve hung out. Why can’t we go?”

Cam sighed and put on his best puppy dog face. “Look. If I do decide to go to school here, these are the people I’ll be living with. I want to stay a while and get to know them. Hang out a little so that I won’t feel so isolated when I start the school year. Can you just please support me on this? I’ve been there for you for months now. I just want one night, okay?”

Alaina opened her mouth to object, but realized he was right. And even though she didn’t feel completely comfortable in the fraternity scene, Cam had been there for her, and he deserved for her to return the sentiment. “Fine,” she sighed, “we’ll stay for a while. But please don’t go doing anything stupid like drinking with these guys. You’re better than that, Cam.”

An expression of guilt mixed with anger washed across Cam’s face for a split second, but was abruptly gone. “I knew you’d understand!” He returned his arm to her shoulder and guided her back to the group of lawn chairs. When they arrived, a tall blonde, Barbie doll looking girl that was standing beside Josh bounced toward them with a blindingly white smile.