I began to feel faint.
Reaching out for the nearby counter, I grabbed onto it to steady
myself. It finally dawned on me why I felt so tired and weak. I was
starved–and not for blood. In complete shock my body took over my
thoughts and before I knew it, I had my head buried in the fridge
looking for some kind of food. I needed sustenance.
To my disappointment, the
food that was in the fridge for Stone had turned bad. It had been
too long since he was in the house, from his disappearance to his
new life as a vampire, he now had no need for any of it and no one
had thought to clean the fridge out. Next I headed for the pantry
and as I did, I could not help but chuckle. There were so many
things I had forgotten about being mortal. The little things that
take up so much time but need to be done, such as buying and
cooking food to the need of relieving oneself seemed so… normal.
The fact that I would be experiencing normalcy felt very abnormal
to me.
Looking
at the little amount of canned food and an assortment of unnatural
foods–corn, peas,
Chef-Boy-Ardee
,
Pop Tarts
–I knew immediately that I
was not going to be eating here. Even though I knew how the
appliances worked in theory, I had never used any of them. I was
not about to fiddle around with the microwave unless Stone was
around to guide me. The thought alone of dealing with it myself
even annoyed me. So, it was decided. I would go out to some
restaurant to eat.
Walking out of the kitchen,
through the living quarters and towards the foyer, I walked with
purpose. Once in the foyer, I went directly for the coat rack and
slipped on a jacket. Once dressed, I went through each of the
remaining coats on the rack hoping to find keys to any vehicle.
Thankfully, on the second try I came across a set of car keys.
Pulling them out and dangling them before me, I examined which car
they belonged to. They were Eme’s keys, and she had the Lexus. I
didn’t care to look any further for my car keys; this would be
fine.
Stepping out into the cold,
my breath billowed around me until it disappeared into the air.
Purposely, I breathed out heavily, one long exhale, then another.
It was fascinating to me. As a vampire, I really did not have the
same experience. The breath exhaled as a vampire in the cold winter
months was much less noticeable than a mortal’s. This was yet
another experience to further my acknowledgment that I was
human.
Now in
the car, I turned the ignition and waited a good ten minutes for
the car to warm up. As I did I lowered the visor. The bright sun
caused my eyes to ache. They were still not used to such a thing.
Noticing the little square mirror centered on the visor I couldn’t
help it, I had to look at myself. I needed to know what I looked
like now. The first thing I noticed was the fierceness in my eyes,
the demon within that glinted in them, was gone. My eyes seemed to
have a sparkle to them. A sparkle of life, of joy. I then noticed
that my skin was not
white
any longer. Mind you, yes, I was still extremely
pale, but I no longer had that shocking white porcelain skin. I had
ruddiness to my cheeks and the lines of my human life seemed all
the more noticeable, no longer smoothed out by vampire blood. My
hair was still a pretty blond, but it no longer had that luminance
to it, nor did my skin.
Satisfied with my
examination, I adjusted the seat and mirrors then buckled the seat
belt and put the car into gear. Driving around aimlessly, the
streets were quiet since it was Christmas. Most people were at home
with their families. The decorations that illuminated and animated
the streets of Montreal at night, gave the city a different kind of
festive feel during the day. In general the decorations were
something I never paid any real attention to. Why would I? It was
something that seemed so trivial to me as a vampire. Yet through
the eyes of a mortal, I now saw how the little things such as
decorating Christmas trees and hanging lights were a cherished
tradition. This season, above any other, was still able to bring
families together in an era that seemed to forget about the
importance of fellowship.
Unable to take my hunger
any longer, I stopped at the first open restaurant I could find,
which ended up being a truck stop restaurant. Standing in the
entrance, that silly grin of delight was glued on my face again as
I looked for that perfect seat by the window. Glancing over the
other patrons and the restaurant workers, I couldn’t help but
notice their lack of interest in me. They did not look at me in
that particular questioning way as before. They now gave me warm
smiles as we made quick eye contact. It gave me such delight to be
part of human nature again.
Taking a seat at a booth at
the window, I waited for the waitress to come by. There were not
many seated and almost all of them were men. They hovered over
their meal and paid no attention to anyone, only to their
food.
I fiddled with the creamers
and the sugar packets until the waitress came up in a rush before
me and placed a menu on the table.
“Can I get you anything to
drink?” She asked while smiling politely at me. The first thought
that came to mind was the red wine I used to always order. A grin
crossed my lips for a moment.
“Water please.” I didn’t
really know what else to ask for.
“Alrighty then. Our special
of course is a turkey dinner: mashed potatoes, mixed veggies,
cranberry sauce and gravy. It also comes with dessert–apple
crisp.”
My mouth watered as the
waitress described the food. “I’ll have that. That sounds great.” I
said. I was so hungry. Knowing that in a few moments I would be
eating made me giddy.
“I’ll be back with your
water.” She said and off she went.
Waiting patiently, it was
the water to come first and then eventually she placed the food
before me.
“Oh, thank you. It looks
delicious.” I said, grinning from ear to ear. The waitress just
smiled, nodded and went off again.
Grabbing the fork, I dipped
it into the gravy-covered potatoes and brought it to my mouth. It
was better than I could have ever imagined. I let my tongue play
with the silky smooth potatoes. The sensation of the potatoes
combined with the meaty taste of the gravy made me give way to an
“Mmmm”, of delight. I then took a piece of turkey, dipped it in the
cranberry sauce and ate it. The wonderful contrasting taste of
salty meat and the sweet cranberry was ambrosial.
It didn’t take long before
I was scraping at my plate with the fork and my stomach was
noticeably full. I couldn’t believe how feeling full could give me
such a content feeling. I couldn’t help but release a sigh of
delight. As the waitress came racing by, she took the empty plate
and dirty utensils, and headed off again without saying a
word.
Sitting there, sipping at
my water, I watched the sky darken as snow clouds began to roll in
and the sun crept towards the horizon. Interrupting me from
enjoying the picturesque winter scene, the waitress this time
addressed me. Looking up at her, she placed the bill onto the table
along with a couple of candy mints.
“That was all, right?” She
asked. I nodded and she left me once again. Reaching out, I flipped
over the piece of paper and as I did I realized–I had no money! I
hadn’t thought of it! My heart began to pound and having no control
over it, my face flushed.
Quickly I looked about the
restaurant. No one was up front and the waitress had gone into the
kitchen. Trying to stay calm, I slid out of the bench and stood. I
would walk out while no one was watching. As I took my first step,
to my disappointment the waitress came walking through the kitchen
doors. As she came towards me, I said the first thing that came to
mind.
“Where
are the washrooms?” I asked, unable to control the flush of
colour
that came to my face. I smiled weakly and hoped
that she did not suspect anything, but I feared she
did.
“Over there.” She directed,
pointing to the other side of the restaurant.
“Thank you.” I said and
made my way for the washrooms.
Staring at my reflection in
the bathroom mirror I began to feel that choking sensation of
panic. I thought I was about to hyperventilate, but out of the
corner of my eye, I saw a small rectangular window at the back of
the washroom just past the last stall. Walking to the window, the
sound of my footfall on the tiled floor echoing, I prayed that it
would open.
Reaching up for the
window’s frame, I turned the lock. With a hefty push, I was
ecstatic as the window opened with little resistance. Pushing the
window up as far as it would go I then grabbed onto the base of it
and tried to lift myself up. However being that the bottom of the
window was at my chin, I hadn’t enough upper body strength to do
it.
Cursing under my breath,
this was when I realized how physically weak I really was. Looking
around the washroom, I searched for something to climb onto.
Noticing a trash can under the counter, I snatched it and brought
it back to the window. Stepping carefully onto the rim of the trash
can, right foot first then the left. Balancing precariously on the
edge of the can, I boosted the upper part of my body to rest on the
frame and kicked my legs to shift myself forward.
With half my body out the
window, the bathroom door swung open.
“Hey! What the hell do you
think you’re doing?” A woman bellowed.
“Oh, shit!” I muttered.
Before I could do anything to prevent it, I fell hard onto the
snow-covered ground with a distinct thud. Moaning, I lay there for
a moment. The wind had been knocked out of me. Once the woman’s
head popped through the window and then the waitress’, I rolled
somewhat and crawled onto my knees then to my feet.
I couldn’t believe this was
happening. Panicked and fearful, I ran to the car and drove off,
tires spinning on a patch of icy pavement.
Completely shaken, I drove
around aimlessly. It wasn’t long before I had to turn the
headlights on. The sun had set and the last bit of daylight was
fading rapidly. I eventually found myself on Saint Laurent
Boulevard. Right away I noticed that those who lingered on the
streets after dark on Christmas Day eve were not of the best ilk.
Looking rather shifty and sinister I couldn’t help but wonder if
any of those that wandered the streets were vampires,
hunting.
As I drove, my thoughts
gnawed at me. I felt like I couldn’t go back to Chantonnay. Deep
down I knew I had to get away from them if I wanted to live out my
human life. With the sun well below the horizon, my vision became
cloudy as I succumbed to the inevitable tears of being
overwhelmed.
I was pissed off at myself
for not remembering to grab a wallet, purse, or anything; I could
not even stay at a motel. I truly had nowhere to stay. I wiped away
the tears repeatedly in an attempt to see where I was driving. I
was exasperated at myself and at my human weakness and fears. With
a few deep breaths to calm myself, I attempted to clear my
thoughts. Reaching for the radio dial, I hoped the joyous songs of
Christmas would alleviate me of some of my worries. But I knew any
relief gained from the music would be minimal and
short-lived.
Chapter 24
(Mylana, Stone and Brian –
December 25, 1999)
In a near frenzied state,
Mylana couldn’t help but lose her composure. Deirdra was gone and
Mylana was frightened by the disappearance. The fact that she was
out there alone, terrified Mylana. Having no memory of who she was,
she did not know of the things that went bump in the night. The
very thought that some wandering rogue vampire could end her life
was torture to her. Mylana knew that if she lingered on the idea of
losing Deirdra again, she would go mad.
“I can’t
calm down. We need to find her and find her
now
!”she demanded of Eme. Mylana was
still unable to process Deirdra’s newly gained mortality. The sound
of her precious heartbeat had resounded in Mylana’s ears, the scent
of the blood that flowed through her veins had invaded her nostrils
and the warm feeling of her soft skin had been so sweetly tempting.
It was still inconceivable to Mylana.
Mylana couldn’t help but
feel torn between her feelings. Part of her wanted to let Deirdra
live this new life, to do the things she should have done over two
hundred years ago. While the other part of her didn’t want to see
her skin age, wrinkling and graying with time. Mylana was unsure if
she could trust herself with Deirdra, because she already had
fleeting thoughts of bringing her across again. But she knew that
Deirdra wouldn’t want that life, and Mylana wouldn’t do anything
against Deirdra’s will.
Eme was the second to rise
that night and she tried to calm Mylana down.
“Mylana, we will find her.
Calm yourself child.” Eme said while smoothing her hair. Mylana was
on the verge of tears but with a large sigh, she released it all
with her exhale. Looking deep into Eme’s eyes, she searched for her
true feelings.
“Did you know she would
return to being mortal?” Mylana asked seriously. Eme’s guard went
up and she became defensive.