Don't! For God's sake, Beth, don't do this!
her mind was screaming, but her body was all too willing.
The voice in her head was silenced as his arms surrounded her, dragging her roughly against the straining contours of his body. Whether he planned to tumble to the ground or whether Jenner simply lost his balance, she never knew, but soon they fell onto the dry grass, kissing hungrily, hearts beating a savage rhythm. His mouth was warm and anxious, his fingers strong, as he pressed against the small of her back, forcing her against him with an urgency that caused her blood to heat as it had only once beforeâwith Jenner on the night that Cody had been conceived.
His hands tangled in her hair and he kissed her as if he would never stop, his lips hard and demanding, his tongue supple, his body straining for release. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew she should stop him, that kissing him was dangerous, that she would never recover from the mistake of making love with him. Yet she couldn't force the words of denial over her tongue.
Her skin was on fire, and she felt the bulge beneath his jeans, the rough denim straining against the seams. Slowly, as if giving her time to tell him to stop, he reached beneath her jacket, found the hem of her sweater, and inched his fingers up her ribs. She gasped as his hand shoved the cup of her bra aside to grasp her breast. His thumb moved restlessly over her nipple and she arched beneath him.
“That's it,” he whispered, kissing her hungrily as he shoved the jacket from her shoulders and pulled the sweater over her head. Then she was nearly naked, her bra twisted beneath one breast. While looking deep into her eyes, he traced the edge of her nipple with a finger and watched as her abdomen sucked in. “God, you're incredible,” he said, then held her breast and slowly lowered his head to brush the tip with his lips.
A jolt shot through her the moment his tongue traced the path his finger had taken earlier. Grabbing the back of his head, she held him close to her, and he eagerly took her breast in his mouth, sucking as if thirsty for all of her.
Heat swirled deep in her innermost core. Wet and hot and dark, the want uncurled through her blood. She felt him shift, knew that he'd unhooked her bra and dropped it somewhere in the grass as he'd rolled her on top of him so that he could bury his face in her breasts, tasting of one succulent nipple before turning to the other.
When he finally looked up at her, his face was flushed, his eyes a deep, dangerous blue. Without a word, he slipped his hand beneath the waistband of her jeans, popping the top button. Her throat turned to sand. He moved his hand. Fingers grazed her skin and another button popped, the sound seeming to ricochet off the surrounding hills. Pop. Pop. Pop. His hand was beneath her underpants, parting the nest of curls, delving deep inside her.
“Is this what you want?”
Breaking through the haze of their lovemaking, his voice shocked her.
Yes!
She tried to clear her mind, but his hands were still tantalizing her, and he breathed hotly across her nipple, causing it to grow harder still. The hollow ache within her begged to be filled. “I...”
“What, Beth? Tell me.” His fingers moved and she moaned, tossing back her head, letting her hair fall down her back.
“Jenner,” she whispered hoarsely.
“Is this what you want? Is this why you came to me?”
“Yes. No. I don't know.”
He froze and his eyes focused. “Damn it all.” Angrily, he rolled away from her, apparently disgusted with himself as well as her. “Look, let's get out of here before we do something we'll both regret later.” He saw her sweater, picked it up and tossed it to her. Then he hitched himself over to where his crutches lay and hauled himself onto his feet.
Beth felt like she'd been slapped in the face. He'd wanted her; she'd responded to his desire, noticed the swelling in his jeans. And yet he'd rejected her, acted as if she'd planned to seduce him. Mortified, Beth struggled into her clothes, fastening her bra and pulling her sweater over her head with lightning speed. She felt the heat in her cheeks, knew she was blushing, and wondered what in the world she'd been doing kissing Jenner, holding Jenner, letting him touch her in the most intimate of places. “I didn't mean toâ”
“Neither did I.”
“Butâ”
“Let's just go, okay? No need to talk about it.” He planted his crutches firmly in front of him and, with jerking movements, plunged toward the truck. “I should never have brought you here.”
“Don't blame yourself.”
“Oh, and who should I blame?”
Anger and frustration building in her blood, she shook the grass from her hair and started after him. “Don't blame anyone, okay? There's no reason to try to lay blame.”
“Hell,” he muttered.
“We both just made a mistake. No big deal,” she said, feeling the lie trip on her tongue. It was a big deal and she should never have let it happen. But it was over...or was it? How could she have been so stupid? Hadn't she already learned her lesson where Jenner McKee was concerned?
Stomping after him, she saw his crutch slip just before he reached the pickup. He swore and fell to the ground with a thud. As his bad leg crumpled beneath him, he let out a cry.
“Jenner!” Beth quickly ran to his aid and dropped to her knees next to him.
“Leave me alone!”
“Let me see.”
He grabbed her then and his eyes flared in pain. “I said leave me alone, for God's sake. It'll be fine!”
“Let me be the judge of that.”
“You can't judge anything.” He tried to move, his face paled, and his breath hissed between his teeth. “Son of aâ!”
“Come on, let me help youâ” She tried to touch his arm, but he yanked it away.
His nostrils flared. “I saidâ”
“I heard you. Loud and clear. But I'm just trying to help. I'm a nurse, for crying out loud.”
“Big deal. I don't want or need any help!” he asserted as he found one crutch that had fallen into a clump of sagebrush. Gritting his teeth, he hauled himself upright.
The second crutch was farther down the hillside, and though he grumbled at her, Beth retrieved it. “You could let people help you, you know. It's not a sign of weakness.”
“I said I don't want any help. Hell, you're as bad as my family!” His face was a ghastly shade of white and he winced as he plunged the crutches ahead of him and tried to walk, but he didn't say another word, only hobbled to the driver's side of the truck and slammed his crutches into the bed. “You gettin' in?” he demanded, shooting her a glance that was so hostile she nearly backed up a step. “I'd hold the door for you, butâ”
“Don't!” Her temper ignited. His head snapped up and she held his gaze. “Don't you ever patronize me, and for God's sake, don't act like I'm pitying you just because I want to help you! I'm a medical professional and I think we should immobilize your leg, stretch you out in the back, and run you into the nearest emergency room.”
“No way.”
“Butâ”
“I said I'm fine, Beth. Just get in the damned truck.”
“Only if you let me drive.”
“Forget it.”
“You're hurt, for crying out loud!”
“And I'm not gettin' any better waitin' on you!”
With renewed determination, she stalked to the driver's side and waited. “For once in your life, Jenner McKee, let someone do you a favor. Quit being so damned bullheaded and let me drive so that you don't kill us both.”
“I said no.”
She crossed her arms firmly under her breasts and shot him an authoritative glare that she'd practiced on her most recalcitrant patients. “I'm not about to risk my neck just because you're reckless with yours. I'm a mother and Cody's counting on me coming home in one piece, which I fully intend to do, even if his father is a muleheaded, stubborn jerk who doesn't know a helping hand or an olive branch when he sees one!”
“Oh, hell.” Grumbling all the way, he climbed into the cab and slid over to the passenger side. Beth noticed the way he winced as he dragged his bad leg across the seat, swung it under the dash, then slumped against the door. She climbed behind the wheel and managed to start the old truck. She caught a glimpse of the weathered cabin and the grass that had been flattened during their lovemaking and she felt like a fool all over again.
Why had she let him kiss her? Why couldn't she resist him?
From the corner of her eye, she caught him watching her, his eyelids at half-mast, and she felt an uneasy fluttering in her stomach, the way she always did when he stared at her intently.
She drove slowly down the hillside, paused and let the truck idle on the far side of the gate, then swung it shut and climbed back in. Jenner didn't say a word. In fact, he spent the entire ride back to town in brooding silence.
When she turned onto the street where his apartment house was located, he roused. “You can take me to your place.”
“I'll walk,” she insisted. “It's less than a mile.”
“I'll drive you.”
“I
want
to walk, Jenner,” she insisted and parked the truck near the curb.
“For the love of God, woman,” he grumbled, but didn't protest any further. She let him get out of the truck by himself, but he had no choice but to accept her help getting downstairs. He slung his arm over her shoulders and used a single crutch. By the time he was unlocking the door to his apartment, he was sweating and gritting his teeth against the pain.
“Let me get Skyeâ”
“Don't even think about it, Beth.” He yanked out the key and shouldered open the door. Once inside, she frowned. There wasn't a bed to stretch him out on, only a bedroll on the cracked tile floor. “Maybe I'd better take you to the Rocking M.”
He let out a humorless laugh. “Not on your life.”
“But you need a bed. And how're you going to get to the bathroom?”
“I'll manage,” he said as he settled onto the bedroll and groaned.
She wasn't convinced and decided that she couldn't leave him to fend for himself. She knew he wasn't going to like what she planned, but she had an obligation to him, didn't she? She couldn't just leave him lying on the floor in agony. “Okay, Jenner, I want to look at your leg, so I'm going to ask you to take off your boots and jeans. I'll helpâ”
“Like hell!”
“It's either that or I call your mother or the clinic.”
His fists clenched. “For God's sake, woman, just leave me alone.”
“Can't do it,” she said, determined to win this battle. “Now, are you going to help me, or am I going to have to strip you myself?”
“You really don't know when to quit, do you?” Jenner glared up at her as she knelt next to him. “Or is it that you just want a peek at what I've got in my pants?”
“Don't try to intimidate me.” Beth was already kneeling at the end of the bedroll, ready to help remove his boots.
“This isâ”
“Necessary,” she supplied crisply and reached for the heel of his boot. She thought he might wrest his foot away, but he didn't.
“Damn it all, anyway,” he growled but slid out of first one, then the other.
“Good. Now the jeans.”
“My God,” he muttered, but undid his belt. She looked away, but her back stiffened as she heard the buttons of his fly pop in rapid successionâlike her own had done only an hour before.
Cursing under his breath, he tried to struggle out of his jeans, and Beth, telling herself that he was now just a patient, helped him squirm away from the denim. Her breath caught as she saw his legs, white from lack of sun, sprinkled with dark hair and firmly muscled, though his left leg was thinner than the right. A bruise and swelling had already formed at his ankle and she examined it carefully, fingers probing gently against the discolored flesh. “Can you move it?”
“Couldn't much before.”
“Tell me if this hurts.” Gently rotating his foot, she watched him and saw the pain flare in his eyes.
His breath whistled over his teeth. “Hell, yes, it hurts,” he said.
“Looks like you've sprained it...maybe more.” Carefully she let go of his foot and tried not to notice that the front of his Jockey shorts was straining over a large swelling. “I think you should see a doctor.”
“Why doesn't that surprise me?” He was lying faceup, his hands beneath his head so that he could study her. “The thing is that doctors can't do anything for me. They've already tried, or can't you see the scars?”
She'd noticed them, of course.
“I've got more plastic and metal in that leg than I've got bone and muscle.”
“I doubt that. But it's all the more reason for you to see aâ”
“Come here,” he said in a voice so low she could barely hear him.
“What?” she said, then caught his gaze. Cloudy like blue smoke, filled with desire.
“Come here, Beth.”
“I'm here....”
“Closer.”
“Jenner, I don't think thatâ”
“Don't think, Beth,” he said, lowering his hands and reaching for her. Strong arms surrounded her and he pulled her steadily closer, so that she was lying half on top of him. He dragged her head to his, and hard, anxious lips claimed hers with a hunger that touched a forbidden spot in her heart. “You want to make me feel better, don't you?”
She'd told herself that she wouldn't get involved with him, that she wouldn't touch him, that she wouldn't fall for him, and yet here she was kissing him and feeling the strength of his body in hers.