Revive (Storm MC #3) (11 page)

I could have killed her.  I hadn’t told Harlow about Nash and I, but she was looking at me with interest now, waiting for my response as much as Roxie was.  “Yes,” was all I said.

“And?” Roxie prompted.

“And nothing.  He just wanted a bit of fun and now he’s done with me.”  The words physically hurt to say.

Harlow’s eyes widened.  “You slept with him?”

I shot Roxie a foul look before answering Harlow, “Yes, once.”

Harlow looked like she was about to burst with excitement.  “I knew you two were totally suited!”

“No, we’re not.”  I sculled my drink; maybe the alcohol would numb the pain that thinking about Nash caused.  “Can we please change the subject?”

I must have said that with enough oomph to make them realise I really didn’t want to discuss Nash.

Roxie was straight on it.  “When do you finish your beauty course?  Cause I’m thinking I need a beautician in my salon.”

“Shit, that would be awesome.  I finish in about a month.”

She grinned.  “Good.  That’s settled; we’ll get a room set up for you.”  She beckoned to the bar tender to bring us more drinks while I let the happiness settle in me that she’d made that offer.  Nothing in my life had ever come easy, often it felt like I was pushing shit up a hill, but some things were finally falling into place.  And this was a huge step in the direction I wanted to go.

“I think we’ve had enough to drink,” I suggested, looking at Harlow who was swaying like there was a bloody cyclone passing through.

Roxie followed my gaze and began laughing.  She reached out and grabbed Harlow, trying to steady her.  “Doll, it might be time to take you home to lover boy.”

Harlow smiled a drunken smile.  “Yeah, he’d like that.”

Roxie murmured, “Oh, I’m sure he would.”  She indicated for me to help her get Harlow under control and we made our way outside to find a cab.  “Does she always get this drunk this quick?”

“No, she can usually hold her liquor.  Maybe she didn’t eat much today,” I suggested.

Harlow interrupted us.  “Was busy at the cafe today, didn’t get to eat anything after breakfast,” she slurred.

“Scott’s going to be pissed at us for letting you drink this much,” Roxie said.

“Totally not our fault,” I said.  I wasn’t taking the blame for this if Scott wanted to have a go.

Harlow giggled.  “Don’t worry about Scott.  He’s easy to control.”

I laughed out loud.  “Umm, only for you, Harlow.  No-one else gets away with the shit you do where Scott’s concerned.”

She giggled again just as a guy approached us on the footpath.  “Ladies, you ready to go home?”

“That’s one of the worst pick up lines I’ve ever heard,” I scoffed.  “And that’s a damn shame, dude, because you’re rocking some serious hotness there.”  I drank in his muscles, his dark hair, his tats; he had the exact look that did good things to a woman, but he seriously needed to work on his flirting skills. 

Nash could teach him a thing or two.

Shit.  Random thought number five hundred about Nash for the week; I had to get him out of my system.  Maybe this guy could help me after all.

Before I could think about that any further, Harlow trilled, “No, silly, he’s the prospect.  Scott must have sent him to take us home.”

“Either that, or he sent him to keep an eye on you.  That’s a little too controlling for me,” Roxie didn’t hide her aversion to men who took charge like Scott did.

Harlow cocked her head.  “No, I don’t see it that way.  Scott likes to make sure I’m safe; I think he only has good intentions when he does stuff like this.”

“Yeah, I’m not so convinced.”  Roxie wasn’t a man-hater; she just valued her independence and didn’t cope well when her man involved himself in her life like Scott did with Harlow.

The prospect tried to hurry us up.  “While I find your conversation about men amusing, ladies, I’d like to get you home so that I can get back to more pleasurable activities.”  He winked at me as he said this, and his hotness rating skyrocketed. 

“I bet you would,” Roxie said.

His smirk almost convinced me to throw myself at him but there was some niggling thing in the back of my mind stopping me. 

Nash
.

I inwardly sighed.  Nash sure knew how to capture a woman’s attention.

Roxie pushed Harlow into the front seat of the prospect’s car and she and I took the back seats.  It wasn’t a long trip to Scott’s house, only about fifteen minutes, and he was waiting outside for us when we pulled up.  Harlow stumbled out of her seat into his arms and he grimaced at her drunken state. 

He turned his gaze to me and I held up my hands in defence.  “Your girl didn’t eat today apparently.”

He muttered something under his breath but nodded at me.  “Thanks for getting her home safe.”

Harlow wrapped her arms around his neck and said,  “They’re good to me, those girls.”  She hit him with a megawatt smile and you could see the annoyance seep right out of him.  Damn, that man was so far gone on his woman.  I never thought I’d ever see Scott Cole whipped but it seemed that Harlow had done just that.

“You’ll get Velvet and Roxie home, okay?” he directed at the prospect who nodded.

“Thanks,” he said, and then he took Harlow inside.

I got out of the car and quickly made my way to the front seat.  Doing up my seat belt, I looked at the prospect and asked, “So, you got a name?”

He grinned.  “Yeah, darlin’, it’s Wilder.”

“You don’t talk much do you?”

“I say what I need to say.”

Roxie interjected from the back seat, “Velvet, let the man rest his mouth.  He probably has other things planned for it tonight.”

I caught his grin.  “How long have you been a prospect for?”  I continued firing questions at him.

“Coming up to one year.”

Damn, he was hard to make conversation with, and not that I wanted to flirt with him, but I figured that would be pointless too.  I was sitting next to him with my cleavage on full display and he hadn’t even taken a look.  Not even a peek.  “You’re not into women?” I asked.  I favoured directness; it usually got you the answer you were looking for rather than fucking around with subtle questions.

He finally ran his eyes over my body before running his hand through his hair.  “Baby, you’ve no idea.  But it ain’t worth my while to even look at a woman the VP is friends with.”

“Thank God for that, because I gotta tell you, it would be a loss to womankind if you were into guys.”

He laughed and I lamented the fact I was friends with Scott.  We finished the rest of the drive home in silence.  He dropped Roxie off first and then me.  As I was getting out of the car, I said, “If I ever stop being friends with Scott Cole, I’ll be sure to look you up.”  He grinned and I gave him a wink before going inside.  It had been ages since I’d flirted with a man and it felt good.  Maybe it was time to get back out there and find some fun.

Everything Has Changed ~ Taylor Swift & Ed Sheeran

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N
ash  

I dropped my head down into my hands.  The question Madison had just asked me was one I didn’t want to think about, let alone answer.

“Nash,” she said, quietly, “You do feel something for her, don’t you?”

The pressure I felt when I thought about Velvet buzzed in my head.  It was easier not to think about her, and fuck, I’d tried.  Ever since I’d pushed her away, I spent most of my time trying not to think about her.  But she consumed my thoughts, day and night.  It was worse at night when I was alone, and the darkness encouraged my mind to wander into dangerous territory.  Thoughts of the past collided with thoughts about Velvet, and the weight of everything was almost unbearable.

I looked back up at Madison.  She was watching me, waiting patiently for me to reply.  Finally, I admitted the truth.  “Yes, I do.”

She smiled.  It was a smile full of kindness and love.  “Have you ever felt like this about a woman before?”

I sucked in a breath.  This was shit I didn’t want to go over, but I’d gotten to the point where I knew I had to.  I couldn’t ignore it any longer.  “Once.  A very long time ago.”

She nodded.  “Who was it?  Tell me about her.”

I’d come here tonight with the intention of talking.  Hell, I’d actually asked Madison if I could come over to talk, but now I wanted to get the fuck out of here.

At my silence, Madison spoke again.  “Nash, you once told me that people like us need to get this stuff out otherwise we fall back into old habits.  You need to talk, and I want to be here for you because you’ve always been there for me.”

I hated it when my words were thrown back at me, even if it was done out of kindness.  Ah, fuck it.  I opened up.  “It was my ex wife, Gabriella.  I met her when I was twenty; the first chick I ever did crazy shit for.  She fuckin’ knew how to push my buttons to get what she wanted and I was a fool for her.”

Madison’s face was full of surprise.  “Wow, I didn’t realise you’d been married before.”

“It’s not a fact I run around advertising, babe.”

“So, she screwed you over, huh?”

“In all senses of that word.”

“What do you mean?”

My chest was heavy with the anger I’d never resolved where Gabriella was concerned.  “She fucked around on me.  I found out and we agreed to work on it but then I found out she kept that shit up.  And then she screwed our family right over.” 

Fuck.

My heart was pumping hard and fast in my chest.  I stood up and began pacing the room, taking deep breaths to try and calm myself down. 

“Are you okay?”  Madison came up behind me and placed her hand on my back.

It never failed to amaze me what the human touch was capable of.  Sometimes it hurt and sometimes it loved.  Madison’s gentle touch was loving and it was exactly what I needed right now.  It helped quiet the demons and after a couple of minutes, I had my breathing under control.

I turned to face her.  “A man’s lucky to have a woman like you in his life, sweet thing.”

“I’m always here for you, Nash.  It hurts me to see you like this; I wish you would let me help you more.”

I pulled her close.  “You are helping me, babe.  More than you know.”  I let her go so I could look her in the eyes.  “I’ve never really talked to anyone about this shit.  I know I need to but I’ve gotta get my head ready first.”

“I understand.  Just remember that I’m always here whenever you need to talk.”

“Thanks, darlin’.”

The air was thick with the burden of ghosts.  This was why I hated digging up shit from the past.  We both took a moment to deal with it.

Eventually, Madison smiled at me before asking, “So, what are you going to do about Velvet?”

“I don’t know what to do with that,” I admitted.

“Okay, let’s break it down.  You slept together but then you pulled away and were a bastard to her, right?”

“Yeah.”  My guilt over that was tremendous but I hadn’t been able to bring myself to apologise.  Being near her made me want her even more.

“You pulled away because you’re scared of your feelings for her, right?”

“Fuck, you make me sound like a pussy, Madison.”

“Well, let’s call a spade a spade, Nash.  You men can be real dickheads when you feel something for a woman.  And you’re being one of the biggest dickheads around at the moment.”

“Christ, if I wanted to hear this shit, I would have gone to my sisters, babe.”

“Sorry but you do need to hear this shit.  For the first time in a long time, you’re feeling something and I think it could be good for you.  You hide your pain behind that mask you wear, Nash.  I know, because I used to do it too.  Sex helps numb it but it’ll never go away until you deal with it, and I think your soul is ready to deal with whatever pain has been crippling it for all these years.”

She was right; I knew she was, but I didn’t want to admit it.  Shit, life was a lot easier to deal with when you ignored the pain and fucked it all away.  Problem was, and she was spot on here, the pain always came back.

“I want her, like I’ve never wanted anyone.”

Smiling, she said, “Good, we’re getting somewhere.  So, are you willing to open yourself up to it?”

“Can’t it just be sex?”

“I swear, it’s like pulling teeth with you, Nash.  No, I don’t think it can be.  If it could, you two would already be doing that.”

She had a point.  “Shit,” I muttered.

“Let me ask you something.  How many women have you slept with since you and Velvet hooked up?”

Fuck, reckoning day was here.  “None.”

A huge smile landed on her face.  “You’ve got it bad, Nash Walker, and you don’t even know it.  You need to get your shit together, apologise to her and man the fuck up, dude.”

I scowled at her.  “I’m hearing you, babe.  I’m fuckin’ hearing you.”

Who You Love ~ John Mayer & Katy Perry

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V
elvet

“God damn it!” I yelled into the air around me.  People stared at me but I could care less; it felt good to get it out.  My car had just broken down on Brunswick Street of all bloody streets.  Breaking down in Monday morning traffic on a busy road was like a special kind of hell as far as I was concerned.  Drivers were honking at me and yelling abuse.

“Screw you asshole,” I yelled at one guy, “Not sure what the hell you think I can do about it?”  I extended my middle finger at him to make sure he got my message.

The fact my phone was out of battery didn’t help.  I would have to walk to find a payphone. 

Shit, what a way to start the day.  I reached into the car for my bag, and was searching in it for my purse when I heard the rumble of a bike.  Looking up, I squinted my eyes to see Nash pulling up behind me.  My heart began beating faster and my skin tingled at the sight of him.  He still managed to affect me even after treating me like he had. 

He left his bike and walked to me; his face was unreadable, not pleased but not annoyed.  “Need a hand?” he asked.

Feeling slightly flustered in his presence, I replied, “No, it’s good.  I’m just going to call for help.  You keep going; I’m sure you’re busy.”

He frowned, and ignored what I’d said.  Lifting his chin at my car, he asked, “What’s wrong with it?”