Authors: Krista Ritchie,Becca Ritchie
I take a step towards them to ease the situation, but the
door opens and Aaron slips through and begins to walk over to me. In order to
dodge him, I glance at my father and decide to take a seat beside him.
“Hi, Dad,” I say with a smile, scooting onto the same couch.
“Hey, sweetheart.”
I sit on the edge of the cushion, anxious and timid,
especially as Aaron waits by the bar, wondering if he should approach I guess.
And all the while, I feel Jonathan staring between me, Aaron, my father and my
sister, taking in everything with scrutiny I do not enjoy.
“Should you break them up?” I ask my father and scratch my
arm.
“They always fight,” he says. “Better to just let them work
it out.” He grabs my hand. “Have you been biting your nails? You haven’t done
that since you were a kid.”
I shrug, keeping an eye on my mother and sister. “With Lo
gone…” I trail off, not able to say the rest or tell him the whole truth. I
shrug again, a go-to response right now.
My mother’s voice escalates. “And what did he say that was
so bad?! What could it have been Rose?”
“He didn’t know who David Cameron is!”
I frown.
I
have no
idea who he is.
My mother looks equally lost.
Rose chokes on a laugh. “He’s the Prime Minister of the
United Kingdom, mother.”
“That doesn’t make him unintelligent.”
“It does to me,” Rose tells her. “I don’t want to share
someone’s company if they can’t count to five. I’d rather hang myself.”
So dramatic. And I’m assuming family gets a pass on Rose
Calloway’s incredibly high friendship standards.
I swear I hear my father mutter, “That’s my girl.” He nudges
my arm. “How is Lo doing?”
Jonathan’s muscles twitch at this question, and as I look
over, his eyebrows rise, waiting for me to answer.
“I’m not sure,” I say truthfully. “I haven’t been in contact
with him. I’m not supposed to until he gets further into the program.”
My father nods. “I think what he’s doing is admirable.
Really admirable. Not many young kids realize that they have a problem when
they do.”
I glance to Jonathan. “Do you…feel the same?” I wonder,
gaining a little confidence.
His lips upturn in that bitter, amused smile, so familiar
that my breath knocks from my chest. It reminds me so much of Lo—that’s the
scary part. “I think he should have come to me first. We could have solved it
together. That’s why I’m so angry, Lily. I gave him the life he has, and he
walked away from me.”
“That’s not entirely true…” I trail off, scared of his
pulsing eyes. He took away Lo’s trust fund. He refused to believe that Lo had a
problem. He may have wanted Lo to stay in his life, and maybe he was frightened
by the idea of admitting that he has the same addiction. Maybe he didn’t want
to confront his own demons. And in the end, he left Lo no choice but to leave
and seek help elsewhere.
Before Jonathan responds, I feel Aaron sit by my side. His
arm wraps around the back of the couch behind me, as though we’re together. I
stay stiff and wiggle closer to the edge of the cushion, not wanting to touch
any part of him.
He introduces himself to Jonathan and my father, and they
all act cordial. But I am utterly frozen inside. To make matters worse, Rose
and my mother’s fight has increased to new levels.
“I don’t need a man to fulfill me,” Rose sneers. She points
at my mother with her champagne glass, the liquid sloshing onto the floor. She
hardly notices.
My mother inhales, her collarbone jutting out and cheeks
caving in. “You’re so naïve, Rose. You think this world is going to respect
you? You’re living in a fantasy,” she nearly spits. “Women like us have a
figment of power. In the end, we’re all marionettes to men. Accept it now.”
Rose’s nose flares, her cat-colored eyes piercing. “Lily is
with Lo,” she says. “Why would you ever cause her such pain and make another
man escort her?”
“This again?” she snaps.
“Yes,” Rose retorts. “This
again.
”
My mother sighs. “What if Lo never returns? What if he
chooses to be single by the end of this? I am creating a backup plan for her.
I’m giving her options.”
Her words sting my chest, and I hardly notice Aaron laughing
about something with my father, as if they’re long lost buddies. Lo will
return. Won’t he? He will come back to me. He’ll want me…but the doubt festers
in my soul. And I try to rid it with a confident nod, but I’m not feeling so assured
right now. Not when my mother has zero faith in the man I love.
“Options?” Rose shrieks. “You’ve never given any of us an
option. You know what option I would have liked? The option to disown my own
mother.”
“Stop it,” she snaps. Her chin raises, but I can tell she
holds in a breath, a sign that Rose’s words have truly started to infiltrate
and infect and seep and hurt. “I helped you grow your company.”
“And you never let me forget it,” Rose sneers. The door
cracks open, but no one notices Connor Cobalt slipping in except me. He has on
an expensive tux, but his equally expensive smile is locked away. He wears a
dark frown and stands guard by the door, watching Rose with serious, calm eyes.
I am so grateful he’s here. Because I’m scared for Rose. I’m not sure how to
calm her. I’m not sure what words will take away the pain of tonight.
I wish my mother could hear what Rose is saying. I feel like
she’s screaming to be heard, but no one can understand. No one
gets it.
I stand up, about to go to her,
but Aaron grabs my hand and tugs me back down. He says something to Jonathan
and wraps his arm around my shoulder.
I’m too fixated on my sister to push him off and start an
argument over here. Connor crosses his arms over his chest and glances at me.
He looks at Aaron, and he’s about to come over but I shake my head and mouth,
her.
He hesitates and nods to me in acceptance.
“What do you want from me?!” our mother yells. “I’ve been
there for you your whole life!”
“I want you to say you’re wrong! I want you to apologize for
this evening and for putting me with Matthew Collins and for thinking I’m a
tool that a man can use and dispose. I’m your
daughter
!” Rose screams, angry tears burning from the corners of
her eyes. “You’re supposed to love me by telling me that I’m beautiful and I’m
smart and no man is good enough for me. You’re
not
supposed to tell me I’m worth less than I am.”
My mother inches forward a little. “Can you listen to
yourself, Rose? We’re at an event for your father’s company, and you’re making
it about you. You think you’re a woman? You’re acting like a child.”
Rose stares directly at our mother. Unflinching, unwavering.
And very coldly, she says, “Go to hell.”
My mother’s hand flies and connects with Rose’s cheek, the
slap heard like a gunshot in the lounge room. Jonathan, Aaron and my father go
silent.
Rose drops her champagne glass, and it shatters on the
marble floor. She stares in a trance at the ground, as though she felt nothing
when the contact was made. My heart hammers so hard that the only thing I hear
is the pulsing in my ears.
I have never seen my mother hit anyone. Maybe because I
spent most days with Lo. Maybe because I haven’t been attuned to the happenings
of my family. But the shock strikes me cold. I don’t have the same relationship
with our mother that Rose does. We’re not hostile towards each other. In fact,
we’re…nothing really. I say hi, she asks me how Lo is, and we move on.
I don’t wish for this. To be silently boiling, having to
restrain myself from spewing hateful words and from feeling a hand sting my
cheek. No one would ask for that. And I want to take Rose away from it, but
she’s twenty-two.
The damage is done.
I think we’re all old enough to feel the scars of our
upbringing. Now we just have to find a way to heal.
My mother lets out a breath and says, “I’m sorry…We’ll talk
later. Clearly we’ve both had a lot to drink…” She shoots a quick glance to my
father, and he stands and excuses himself too, following her out of the lounge room
and back to the party.
Aaron keeps pulling me closer to his lap, and I swat him
away, keeping track of Rose in case she needs me. I doubt she’d like to be
reminded that she’s losing control. My interference is like saying, “Your
fucked up little sister is going to rescue you. How screwed up does that make
you, Rose Calloway?” Which is why I asked Connor here in the first place.
He approaches her like a man tiptoeing towards a sleeping
lion. “Rose,” he breathes. “Sweetheart…”
She’s shaking. Her arms tremble, and her eyes keep growing
wider and wider. “She’s wrong,” Rose whispers. I can practically hear her chant
in her head:
I’m not like her. I’m not
like her.
Connor closes the gap between them, and his hands touch her
face, holding her cheeks, and gently soothing the reddened one with a soft
stroke. “Look at me, hun.”
Rose tries to push him off. “Why…” She keeps shaking her
head, but he holds her tight, trying to make her focus.
“I’m right here,” he tells her.
She weakly tries to push him off again, not really wanting
to, and he grabs her hand. “I don’t need you,” she reminds him. But the silent
tears start flowing. She’s crying in front of him, actually letting Connor see
her cracks. I wonder if the emotions are too hard to bottle since she drank so
much. “I don’t need you,” she repeats, her voice breaking.
“You’re right,” he says softly. “You don’t need a man,
Rose.” He pauses and I barely hear him whisper, “But you do need me.”
She looks down and then back at him, her lashes wet and
glistening, making her face look more porcelain and delicate than I ever
remember. “What are you doing here?” she asks with the shake of her head. “You
shouldn’t be here.” Her tears drip on his hands, both rising back to her face.
He tucks a flyaway piece of hair behind her ear, and his eyes graze the welt on
her cheek.
“A little bird told me you were upset.”
Rose lets out a choked cry. “Are you crazy?” She places her
hands on his arms that hold her face but doesn’t force him away anymore.
“You’re talking to birds now?”
His lips twitch into a weak smile. “I’d talk to any woodling
creature if it gave me answers about you.”
“Would you walk through fire for me?” she deadpans.
“Yes,” he accepts the challenge.
“Brand my name on your ass?”
“Possibly.”
“Drink cow’s blood in my honor?”
“You’re so fucking weird,” he says with the biggest grin.
She breaks into a smile but it’s a pained one and then she
starts sobbing. Like truly sobbing. He wraps his arms around her, and she falls
into the hug. He guides her to the bathroom door to the right, and they
disappear inside.
The room has almost cleared out, and I just remember who I’m
actually sitting next to. Aaron leans close and whispers in my ear, “I will
ruin you the way Loren ruined me.”
I gape. A mixture of shock and fear prick me at the sudden
proclamation. Bad timing can’t even begin to describe tonight. I try to stand,
but he grips my wrist so tight that when I jerk up, he brings me right back
down.
Jonathan, frighteningly the only other person in the room,
sets his whiskey on the glass end table “Is there a problem here?” he asks
Aaron.
“Didn’t Lily tell you?” he says with a false smile. “We’re
dating now.”
I shake my head quickly. “No we aren’t.”
Jonathan stares between us, reading my closed body language
and Aaron’s aggressive movement. And then he says, “Get the fuck out of my
sight, kid.”
“Excuse me?” Aaron jerks back in shock.
Jonathan stands and straightens his tie. “Lily.” He holds
out his hand for me to take it, and I am momentarily struck by the change of
events. Is Jonathan Hale really saving me from this douchebag right now?
I shouldn’t take his hand. I should spit at it and walk
away. Lo would. But he’d also kill me if I didn’t leave Aaron when I had the
chance. And I’m not an idiot. I want to be far, far away from him. So I stand,
and this time, Aaron lets me disentangle from him. But I don’t touch Jonathan.
I walk right on past him and head for the door, my exit in view.
Before I leave, I hear Aaron say, “She’s a slut, you know
that, right?”
“And you think I don’t know what my son did to you? I helped
him ruin you, you piece of shit,” he says.
Lo told his father about Aaron? About how he’d tormented
him? I don’t question this. Because Lo’s relationship with his father was a
taboo topic between us. It fluttered in and out of our conversations, and I was
only allowed a glimmer. And I know, without a doubt, that Jonathan Hale would
move mountains for Lo. He just needs to be in the right mood first.
“Like father, like son,” Aaron says.
I have to leave, but I’m glued next to the door. I glance
back one last time, and Jonathan’s eyes briefly flicker to me. “That girl is
practically my daughter-in-law.” He sets a firm hand on Aaron’s shoulder. “If I
hear you did anything to her, you’ll wish all you had to deal with was my son.
Now get out of my fucking face.”
I am so confused.
I don’t know who to root for anymore.
I don’t know what sides to take or who to praise or condemn.
All I know is that my family is royally fucked up. And no
amount of money or luxury can fix these problems. Maybe they even helped cause
them.
I enter the grand ballroom where people wander, standing up
and chatting as though it’s cocktail hour. Streamers and gold and black
balloons lie on the carpet. I missed some sort of celebration. I kick them away
and spot my mother by the stage.
What possesses me to approach her? I’m not quite sure. But
as she talks to my father, I feel like I should just say something. Maybe help
explain Rose’s feelings but in a softer, gentler manner.
Maybe she’ll listen to me
, I think. She never really has, but it’s
a nice thought anyway.