Ricochet (9 page)

Before he can make another move on me, my hand lowers to his
cock and I grip it firmly but not too hard. He groans and leans back into the
tub. I smile into my next kiss and start to massage outside his underwear. I’ve
got this.

But then he grabs me by the waist and in a swift motion, I’m
suddenly on the bottom. I try and jerk away but his fingers find my wrist and
his other hand sinks beneath the waters and touches the spot in between my
legs. I shudder in
need
. My body just
so damn confused at this point.

He leans in, his lips brushing my earlobe. “You’re in
control?” he asks huskily. “
Fight me
.”

I try to push him off again, but he just pushes back,
pinning me to the slippery tub. My slick, naked chest touches his and my mind
can’t process anything but the words
more
and
need
.

I know I’m losing.

“I can’t.”

He doesn’t back away. Just shakes his head in slight
distress.
“Why not?”

“You’re too big.”
And
I think I want it.

He breaks into a smile, but it quickly disappears when he
realizes what this means. “So you’re going to…” he trails off, not able to say
the words.

“I’m going to…not fuck any linebackers or burly guys. And I
have pepper spray, and like I said—I can take care of myself as long as the guy
doesn’t get too aggressive.”
Or isn’t
Loren Hale
.

“You didn’t say that.”

“I’m saying it now.” He’s about to move away and I quickly
blurt out, “Can you put them in me?” No. No. No. I did not…

His hand still lingers on my pussy, cupping it. I don’t look
at his eyes but I can feel him staring at me with amusement.

“You have rules,” he reminds me. “I can’t make you come,
remember?”
Right.
I initiated that rule after Lo and I
went a little too far one day. We didn’t have sex, but I climaxed and it was
too much.
Even if we were in a fake relationship.
But
we still fool around. He still touches me. I still touch him. And right now,
I’m so eager that I just want to feel him inside of me.
Somehow.

“Make up your mind, Lil,” he says softly.

I know he’ll do it if I ask. He’d do anything for me, but I
don’t know if it’s fair to him.
 

“I’ll just…get something else.” Like a toy.

“You sure?”

I give him a weak nod and he finally pulls away from me.
Even in the warm water, I feel kind of cold by the absence of a body.

By the absence of him.

{3}

I slide into the limo where Poppy, Rose and Daisy
sit on the leather seats, my two older sisters filling glasses of champagne. We
each wear a cocktail dress, and the different styles reflect our personalities
a little too well. Poppy wears a bohemian-maroon silk dress with draping
sleeves and a plunging V-neck, a brown belt tight around her waist. Rose sports
a tailored, dark-blue beauty, the neckline straight at her collarbone and a
simple diamond necklace against her breast. She looks ready for a political
commencement speech, not the grand reveal of Fizzle’s brand new soda.

And then my youngest sister wears a green gown, the back
nothing but strings crisscrossed in a wild array of patterns. I, on the other
hand, rushed out of my parents’ house in a strapless, black plain number.
Nothing special about it. Not too flashy. Not exceptionally cute. But it’s
comfortable
and
makes my boobs look a
little bigger.

“Hi,” I say, running my fingers through my brown hair that
reaches my shoulders. Poppy tries to pass me a glass, and I shake my head,
lightly pushing her hand away. “I’m not drinking.” I tried to get out of this
event at least twenty times in the past week, but my mother wouldn’t hear of
it. I’d rather not find a reason to ditch my sisters and dance with an eager
guy.

“I’ll take it,” Daisy says with a coy smile. She wags her eyebrows.

“No,” the three of us tell her in unison. Even though I withheld
the knowledge about the New Year’s debacle from our parents, I had to spill to
Rose and Poppy. I expected Daisy to rampage and hate me afterwards for sharing
the details of the night, but she acted mature about it. In retrospect, I think
keeping the birth control secret has nullified blabbing about being slipped GHB.

“You shouldn’t want to drink ever again after what
happened,” Rose tells her.

“Why? Are you going to drug me, Rose?” She gasps, mocking.
“My very own sister. The betrayal. The scandal!”

Rose gives her a sharp glare. “I wish you’d be serious about
what happened.”

Daisy sighs and slouches, crossing her arms. “I’m never
going to drink hunch punch at a party again. Lesson learned.”

“Thank you.” Rose puts the rim of her glass to her red lips.

“You’re so much like Mom, it’s scary.”

Shit.
Rose’s
solidifies to stone. I see hurt coursing through her, even if no one else can.
I don’t think Daisy realizes how much Rose is trying to avoid being like our
mother. She fears that path more than any of us.

“So…” I say to break the tension. “…this is fun.”
Way to spark a conversation, Lily.
 

The car bumps along the road towards the Ritz where the
event will take place. Fizzle hasn’t created a new soda in five years, so the
unveiling is a big deal. My father has even kept the new flavor pretty
hush-hush from the media and
us.
It
could be Dragon Fruit Fizz for all I know—which sounds incredibly disgusting.

I make a face.

“What?” Poppy says with a short laugh. My oldest sister
looks like a California native with a golden tan year-round. A fish-tail braid
lies against her shoulder. “You look like Maria when I try to dress her in
pants.” Her three-year-old daughter is a mini-fashionista. It’s kind of
frightening.

I share her smile—about to tell her my thought.

“No, no, no!” Rose shouts, typing furiously in her phone. “I
cannot believe this.”

My stomach knots, hoping, praying that her outburst has
nothing to do with me.

Daisy pops a piece of gum in her mouth and offers it to the
rest of us, as though Rose did not just have a sudden outburst. I suppose she’s
overly dramatic a lot. We kinda all are. I take a piece, but Poppy shakes her
head.

“What is it?” Poppy asks.

Rose puts her hand to her forehead and then glares at the
window. “Our mother has taken it upon herself to wrangle us dates for the
evening.”

I choke on my gum and start coughing.

Daisy groans. “Not really.”

Poppy pats my back, but I seriously think I inhaled the gum
straight into my lungs.
 

“She does this every time we go out. It shouldn’t be that
surprising,” Poppy exclaims, putting the rim of her champagne glass beneath my
lips, “mothering” me. Gratefully, I take a small sip, the bubbles tingling my
throat.

“I specifically told her that Lily doesn’t want to be seen
with another man while Lo is in rehab.”

I slump in my seat and put my hand to my forehead, shielding
my eyes. This is not good. This is not good
at
all
. “Who did she call?” I ask Rose. This has happened before. Only, I
wasn’t in a relationship with Lo. I would actually fuck whoever my mother
picked for me at the end of the night. What if she called someone I’ve already
slept with? The bottom of my stomach drops.

“I don’t know,” Rose says, pounding her fingers on her
phone’s screen, texting our mother rapidly. “She won’t tell me.”

Daisy blows a bubble and it pops against her face. “I don’t
see what the big deal is,” she says, using her tongue to bring the gum back in
her mouth. “I mean, it sucks, yeah, but Lo isn’t here, and it’s just for
appearances. Plus, you can always ditch him. Mom set me up with Adam Colefinger
last year.” She grimaces. “He smelled like he showered in Axe. I was about to
hurl the whole night, so I took Mom’s perfume and doused myself in it to give
him a taste of his own medicine.” She nods proudly.

Rose kicks Daisy’s leg. “You’re forgetting the part where he
threw up on your heels.”

“That’s the price you have to pay for retribution.”

Poppy holds up her hands before the tension rips all of us in
half and explodes. Rose is seething enough to cause a category five tornado. I
just want to disintegrate and flutter away.

“There’s nothing to worry about,” Poppy tells all of us.

I exchange a hesitant glance with Rose.
Nothing to worry about?
There is a huge possibility that this guy
is one I’ve met—that he’s back for round two. What if he’s expecting Lily 1.0:
the girl who dragged guys into the bathroom and drowned them in pleasure? What
then?

I put my head between my knees, trying to breathe normally.

Wait for me
, Lo
said.

I’m trying! God, I’m trying. I wish everyone could see that.

It’s not so easy when my whole family believes my only
problem surrounds Lo’s absence. They only understand his addiction, and I
know—deep in my heart—that they’ll never understand mine.

Rose dials a number and rests the phone to her ear “Mother—”

My mother’s high-pitched voice cuts through the receiver.
“Don’t you dare argue with me, Rose!” I raise my head and see Rose holding the
receiver away from her ear. “I have done so much for you in the past week. And
I ask you to do one thing,
one thing
,
and you put up a fight! Can’t you do something for me without disagreeing? Is
that at all possible?!”

Her screaming rakes my insides like nails bloodying my back.

Rose inhales deeply through her nose, taking a calculated,
measured breath. A perk to being completely off my mother’s radar—I never have
to deal with her coarse personality. She can be in your corner one second and
then completely victimize herself the next just to guilt you.

“Let us pick our own dates then,” Rose says. “I can call
Ryke to come escort Lily. He’ll be happy to be there.”
Happy?
That is a very strong adjective.

Daisy crawls over the seat to pick up a remote. “Don’t
torture the guy.”

I kinda agree. Even though I’d love for him to bail me out,
he’s done enough for me, and I’m not sure I can ever repay him.

Rose shoots her a loathing glare and mouths,
shut up
.

Daisy cocks an eyebrow and presses a button on her remote. The
sunroof starts sliding open. The mechanical noise that bleeds into the silence
is like the awkward chorus to our tension.

Our mother snaps, “I’m not calling her date and cancelling
on him. He’s doing me a favor.”

“Then I’ll call him. Give me his number.”

“He’s already
here
,
Rose.”

Rose’s fingers tighten around her silver clutch. And Daisy
stands up in between us, sticking out of the sunroof.

“Not helping,” I tell her.

I barely hear her voice that’s lost to the wind. “I
don’t…like…trapped…”

I sigh heavily, feeling Rose’s panic and mine mix together
in a toxic mess.

Rose nods to me like
I’ll
handle this
. I nod back. I have faith in her, but there is one person not
even Rose Calloway can destroy with her words. “Okay,” Rose says, “I’ll be with
Lily’s date, and she can go stag since I don’t have a date either—”

What? I thought she invited Connor. Or…maybe I assumed she
was going to bring him.

“I know,” my mother tells her, “I called Connor this morning
and asked him if he was planning on riding with the four of you. I don’t know
what was more embarrassing, being informed by your daughter’s boyfriend that
you
broke up with him or calling him and
being made a complete and utter fool.”

Rose touches her forehead. “I highly doubt Connor made you
look like a fool.”

“He didn’t have to. Just being on the outside of my own
daughter’s life was embarrassing enough. I should have known what was going on.
You should have told me.”

“Did he tell you that I broke up with him?” Rose asks now.

“Did you hear me?!” my mother shrieks, about to have a nervous
breakdown. “I should have known.”

“I didn’t even tell Lily!” Rose screams, hair coming loose
from its slicked back position in her pony. She holds the phone to her lips,
putting it on speaker, not that we couldn’t hear it before… “Did he tell you
that I broke up with him?!”

“Oh, let it go, Rose. The longer you control a man, the more
likely they’ll leave you. Is that what you want? To be alone and miserable for
the rest of your life?”

“I don’t know. You’re pretty miserable, Mother, and you’re
married.”

My eyes widen so big that they may very well fall out of my
face. Our mother inhales a sharp breath. After a very long pause, she says in a
controlled, scarily calm tone, “I called a date for you, Rose. I’ll see you
girls at the event.” She hangs up, and Rose collapses back against the seat, as
though she just finished a UFC match.

I don’t think either of them won.

Poppy slides over to her and squeezes her shoulder. “She
probably invited Sebastian to be your date.” Before there was a “Connor and
Rose,” my sister took Sebastian as her arm candy to appease our mother.

Rose shakes her head and begins smoothing her hair back into
place. “No, Sebastian went on a trip to the Cayman Islands with this boyfriend
this week. She knew that.”

I can’t even imagine who she set Rose up with, probably
someone she’d hope Rose would marry down the line. That’s how Samantha Calloway
operates.

Jitters run through my body on high speed. Rose, my rock,
has eyes as wide as a Kit-Cat clock. It’s like my mother has zapped her cold.
When she wakes from her stupor, she reaches into the ice bucket and pulls out
the expensive champagne. She chugs straight from the bottle. I jerk back in
surprise. Considering Rose usually wipes the rim of her soda cans, I think it’s
safe to say she’s upset.

Daisy remains oblivious outside, her long hair whipping
behind her. I guess we all handle our mother in different ways. Rose yells.
Daisy finds fresh air. I sink into a corner. Poppy remains calm.

Rose offers the drink to Poppy. She declines. “I’m safe from
her. I have a husband.” Yeah, our mother has lost interest in Poppy’s
relationships.

“She should know who I am by now,” Rose mutters. “I tell her
all the time, you know?
I’m never getting
married, Mother
. And it goes in one ear and out the other. I thought dating
Connor would make things better. My first actual boyfriend. She’d be off my
case. Instead, she’s whispering in my ear about what to say to him, how I
should be, worrying over whether he’ll end things before I do.” Rose curses
under her breath and stares up at the ceiling of the car. “How can you love
your parents so much, but then absolutely hate them the next?” She inhales a
deep breath. “I need to go back to therapy.”

I break into a smile, trying to lighten her downtrodden mood.
“You know Connor goes to therapy compulsively too? I asked him where he was
going last week, and he said to his daily therapist for just a regular session
to let off some steam. Funny that you two have that in common, huh?”

Rose glares. “His therapist is also his ‘best friend.’ So no,
we do not have that in common. I actually have people close to me that I love.
Like you and Poppy and Daisy…” Her eyes trail up to the torso that stands in
the center of the car. “Does she realize we’re on a highway?”

“I think she prefers it that way.” My eyes widen in mock
horror. “The danger!” I mimic Daisy’s voice.

Rose and Poppy laugh, although Rose’s dies out rather
quickly. She rubs her eyes and groans.
 

Normally, I’d be excited right now, wondering what face will
greet me once we arrive at the event. But I’ve been trying to forget what it
feels like to climax, the tingling of my body—the sensation of masculine, hard
hands sliding along my skin. And I’m afraid once I see a guy, willing and
wanting, I’ll take the opportunity and jump. Without thinking. Without breathing.
I’ll just do it and ruin the one good thing in my life.

Rose lets out another long groan.

I have to ask. “What happened with Connor?”

“I thought everything was fine,” Poppy says.

Rose wedges the bottle between her bony knees. “When I’m
with him, I roll my eyes so much I feel like they’re going to fall out of my
face.” She talks with her hands—so unlike Rose, that I scoot forward on my seat
to be closer to her. Rose gestures to her body, trying to express herself, but
she looks like she’s swatting the air instead.