With a whimper, she saw the sincerity in his face. His eyes were so blue, like the sky, drawing her up, she wanted to drift out beyond the horizon in that sea of blue. Away from this mess.
His hands along her jaw forced her gaze up. “Listen to me. I have never slept with any of them. They’re playing mind games with you, Billie.”
Inhaling sharply, she steadied herself.
You knew this day would come.
Just not so soon.
“Don’t let them succeed in driving us apart. Please?”
She nodded. Whatever came, she’d have to deal with it.
“Will you come with me? I want you to hear something.”
Sniffing, she nodded. Sure, she’d go with the flow. Or drown trying.
* * * *
Man, he couldn’t let her out of his sight without something--or someone--trying to come between them.
Kissing the top of her head, he slid his arm around her waist and tugged her toward the studio. “I’ve been working on something. I want you to hear it.” His step lightened as he hurried her to the studio.
Once inside, he locked the door. “Come on, sit down here.” Nervously, he positioned the chair in front of the stool where his guitar leaned.
Stiffly, she walked where he guided her and sat where he placed her.
Winding the guitar strap over his head, he sat. “Now this is brand new, so it’s a little rough, okay? You ready?” He wished he were.
Sadly, she nodded.
He picked at the strings. Damn. So nervous, his fingers even shook. “No. Wait.” Closing his eyes, his fingers moved along the frets, and the lush melody reverberated along the strings.
His gritty, rich voice mixed with the music:
Life’s brought me riches
More fame than I can use
But I wander this world empty
Hollow as a noose
Until I met you
I didn’t know what I’d been missing
When you’re away
I’m nothing without your love
Billie appeared more calm, but more alert. Interested.
The tremor of his voice slid along his nerves, releasing the tension gathered there.
Now nothing’s so precious as time
I won’t rest until you’re mine
I can only be truly free
If I’m bound to you forever
I’m nothing without your love.
He plucked the beautiful melody from the strings, and the final chord echoed through the room. Afraid to ask, he waited for her opinion.
“Oh my God.” With wide eyes, she gazed at him.
Shit.
She hated it. “Terrible? Because I never claimed to be a poet.”
“It’s beautiful.” Emotion choked her voice.
Excitement gripped him. “Really? Because I already have some ideas about tweaking it. Changing this chord--” He strummed. “--to this, and the lyrics need some work, but...”
“It’s perfect. You shouldn’t change a thing.” Ducking her head, she added, “I’m so glad you’re writing new songs.”
Then why was she so miserable? “Yeah, well. I’ve had a lot of inspiration lately.”
In a lackluster tone, she said, “It’s really exciting. Are you going to record them?”
Why so glum? Wasn’t this what she wanted? With a nervous laugh, he shrugged. “We’ll see.” It must be complete crap, if she reacted so terribly.
At a thump from outside, she turned. “What’s that?”
“I don’t know.” He set down his guitar, went to the window and peered out. “Not Stu, for once.” One of the others, though?
“I should let you get back.” Shouldering her bag, she went to the door.
He couldn’t let her go like this. Sliding his arms around her, he crouched to her eye level. “Are we okay?”
“Yes.”
Damn their interferences. He intended to fully enjoy whatever happiness came along. And right now, happiness overwhelmed every other sense. He’d deal with reality later.
* * * *
When
Rock Bottom
aired that week, one segment followed Cat and Ashley at the vanities. After lining her lips with dark red, Cat pressed them together. “I’m getting tired of Jet’s lack of interest.”
Ashley pulled the straightening rod through her hair. “He has been distracted lately.”
“Frankly, I’m bored as hell. I came here to party with the bad boy of rock, and so far, I feel as if I’m a tourist at an old folks’ home.”
Hair spray formed a cloud around Ashley’s head. “He’s rehearsing a lot, but that’s what I always loved about him. His dedication to his music.”
“I don’t think anyone needs to rehearse music he’s played for years. I wonder if he hasn’t gone over to the other side.”
Mouth agape, Ashley turned. “What? You can’t mean…”
“Playing on the all-boys team. Happens to the best of ’em.” The camera zoomed in as she cupped her breasts. “And when he could have all this. Go figure.”
“Maybe you turn him off. Some men don’t like overly aggressive women.” Ashley smirked.
Or completely fake ones. Grabbing the remote, Jet clicked the set off.
Fear shone in Billie’s eyes. “They’re all suspicious.”
He pulled her closer, his nakedness warm against her own. “Why do you bother watching it? It’s crap. That’s why they air it so late at night.”
“All this pressure’s going to build up to a nasty explosion.”
He loved how he could make a lovely pressure build inside her as his fingers tweaked her nipples. “Cat’s gone now. It’s just Ashley and Julie left. They’re harmless.” He slid his hand down her hip.
She curled into him. “No, they’re still very interested in winning the prize. You.”
“You’re not really worried about that, are you?” He nuzzled her neck.
“I’m worried about Stu. He could mean real trouble for you. I don’t want you to be hurt.”
“I won’t. But I don’t want you to be hurt, either.” Everett could make her life hell. The prick.
“We should…”
“What?” He hovered above her, uncertain of her meaning.
“Stop.”
Pausing, he shot a wry smile. “Stop this? Or…”
Rolling away, she sat up and stared out the window. “I don’t know.”
Shit.
She was serious. “Hey, come here.” His lips tickled her back as his kisses circled to her side. “Please?” he whispered, tugging her down.
With a sigh, she lay back. “Jet, I--”
“Shh.” His mouth silenced her protests, his tongue probing her own. To hell with them. He wasn’t about to let anyone ruin it.
Grasping his head, she kissed him with equal force, pushing any worry from his head.
* * * *
Light edged the horizon when Jet’s soft kiss interrupted her slumber. In the half-light, she watched through sleepy eyes as he dressed, kissed her again and went downstairs. At the click of the door, she drifted back to sleep, hazy with happiness.
Later, when she powered up her laptop, an email from Everett snapped her fully awake.
What the hell is going on out there?
Rock Bottom
’s falling apart, Jet’s mostly a no-show and your posts have been less than impressive recently, although other media are having a field day. Anything you care to share with me, babe?
Babe.
He hadn’t used that term in months. Not in any meaningful way.
He’d included links to several stories from the usual gossip rags, wild speculation about what Jet had been up to. One accused him of having a secret lover.
Damn.
She knew it. Now it was only a matter of time before someone followed Jet, or waited for him to come out of the cottage some night. She wouldn’t put it past Stu to have Danny do the dirty work just to drive sagging ratings back up.
Slumping against the sofa, she closed her eyes. Cat’s elimination had almost appeared too easy, until Jet told her they’d learned of her live-in boyfriend, rooting for her to win so he could share the hundred grand payoff.
With Cat gone, the atmosphere had eased slightly, but Ashley’s sharp glances cut Billie’s way more frequently. Julie, strangely, seemed unaffected, but Billie sensed that Ashley would stop at nothing to have Jet.
At that thought, she readied for the shoot. When she entered the house later, Ashley glanced over from where she sat on the sofa. With a sly smile, she flipped through television channels to VH1. “Do you remember that song of Jet’s?”
Julie read her magazine. “Which song?”
“I’m trying to remember…it went something like…” Her high-pitched voice wavered through the lyrics:
If you want someone to cook for
If you need someone with you every night
I
ain’t
your man
No, baby, not the one you’re looking for.
Frowning, Julie finally glanced up, then uncertainly went back to her article.
Ashley stood, swaying to her off-key song.
If you want someone to bring you flowers
If you need someone to hold you tight
I
ain’t
your man
No, baby, not the one you’re looking for.
Billie remembered. The video especially--Jet wearing a sleeveless tee, hips swaying, the muscles in his arms rippling as his fingers danced down the frets with his searing guitar licks. Not a guy in the audience, all the girls swayed along with him, singing along with his gritty lyrics warning them not to reach for him in the night because he’d be gone, already out looking for someone new.
An anthem of sorts for commitment-phobic guys, Jet had written it after breaking up with his fiancée. The hit prompted a lawsuit from Tommy Conwell, whose Young Rumblers had a similar hit,
I’m Not Your Man
. Like Tommy and his band, the lawsuit faded to black, and Jet and his music endured, fueled by dedicated fans.
With a final hip bump in thin air, Ashley gave a whoop. “Ah, that’s such a great song. So true for Jet. Until recently. He wrote a new song, you know--just for me.” Her gaze met Billie’s. “He called it
Nothing Without Your Love
. He said he wrote it because he loves me so much.”
With a sigh, Julie turned a page. “Nice.”
Closing her eyes, Billie’s stomach churned. How did Ashley know about that song? Had Jet really written it for her? His voice came clearly in her head:
She’s baiting you.
Gulping hard, Billie forced her focus to notepad where she doodled nonsense and tried to block out Ashley, still going on about how much Jet loved her. She caught Danny’s evil chuckle and glare. When the room seemed to close in, she couldn’t stand anymore and stepped outside. Despite the warm evening breeze, she shivered.
Jet rounded the corner. “Hey, I’m glad you’re outside. I have to go make an appearance, but maybe we can take off after that, go somewhere.” Taking her wrist, he tugged her to the shadows. “What’s wrong?”
Other than the fact she couldn’t think straight near him? Could anyone really have him? Jet was right there and yet unreachable.
He’ll always be out of reach.
The lie blurted from her without thought. “Everett’s being a jerk. If I don’t get some work done, he’s going to raise hell.”
“Okay. How long will that take? A few hours?”
“I don’t know. We should just…” With a sigh of frustration, she calculated. Less than a month before the season ended.
“Just what?”
“Everyone knows, Jet. Ashley’s…” The pain of Ashley’s cutting words returned.
“What’s she up to now?”
“I have to work. Please don’t come over tonight. It’s better for both of us.”
“Not for me.” He opened his arms to embrace her.
She stepped out of reach. “Yes, it is. You know it is.”
“What are you saying?”
What was she saying? She had no idea. “I just need a little space.” To breathe. To think.
To remember who I am.
He cocked his jaw, rubbed it as if she’d sucker-punched him. “That’s usually my line.” With a humorless chuckle, he headed for the door.
“Jet.”
Turning immediately, he searched her face, hope fading when she stood frozen, unable to say any more. Nodding, he slowly continued inside.
Stiff as a corpse, she made her way to the cottage, bolted the door and curled, numb, into the curve of the sofa. It couldn’t have been later than seven, but she felt incapable of movement. Light drained away, and darkness seeped inside. She couldn’t tell how long she stayed there, or when she’d fallen asleep, but she awoke to the sound of a soft knock, the handle turning. “Billie? Let me in.”
Tensing, she rose up on an elbow. Jet. He’d come.
“Billie? Are you in there?” Hearing his voice, it reached so deep inside her, she wanted to cry.
Oh, she had it bad. Worse than she’d ever known.
How could you be so stupid? From the beginning, you knew better.
The craziness of the past few months rushed at her, weighed her down until she rested her head on the pillow. “I can’t,” she whispered. Lately, her emotions ranged from dizzy euphoria to sickening lows. A little in-between time, that’s all she needed.
* * * *
Whoever said what a difference a day makes had it right. Yesterday, Jet had been dizzy with happiness. Now if someone asked him to imitate Ozzy Osbourne, he’d gladly bite the head off anyone or anything.
Billie dodged him at every turn.
Shit.
Why hadn’t he forced his way in last night? Standing outside, a sickly feeling had come over him. A whisper nagged him to get to her, not let her believe the crap others fed her. Not let her pull away from him, like he knew she already was.
Today, he’d see her. Convince her. He strode through the kitchen on his way out.
Stu followed him onto the patio. “Whoa, buddy. Let’s take a minute here.”
“For what?”
“To touch base on a few things.” Despite his pleasant tone, his eyes held a hard gleam.
“I’m on board with the schedule. We’re good.” The sight of Billie stepping outside pricked his senses to high alert.
Nothing short of panic filled her face when she saw him. She fled in the opposite direction.
“What about--”
“Gotta go.” He jogged after her. “Hey, can we--”
“No.” She glanced back.
His gaze followed hers. Ashley stood behind Stu, watching along with the two camera guys, even Julie.
Shit.