Rock the Heart (17 page)

He’s right. This whole situation sucks, especially for the band. I’ve seen the tension between the two, in action myself. I knew all that male territory marking was about more than just me. 

Noel drops my hand and then runs his fingers through his hair. His hands stay behind his head while he paces near the foot of the bed. I’ve never seen him like this before—torn between wanting me and needing to take responsibility for a fucked up mess. 

I can’t watch him fall apart like this. It’s not him. “Would you stop that? You’re making me nervous.”

He stops and sighs, before sitting on the edge of the bed. Both of his shoulders slump as his blue jeans strain against the length of his long, muscular legs. My eyes roam over his body. His chest heaves under his red t-shirt as he rests his elbows on his knees and stares at the ground. 

I can’t help but think this is one of the last times I’ll be locked alone in a room with Noel Falcon. This somehow feels like our goodbye. The accusation of always leaving because I’m second to him plays out, yet again. There’s no way I can stay with him while he’s caught up in all this baby-mama drama. 

A few quick steps and I find myself next to him. My body seems to have a mind of its own when it comes to Noel. The pull to him is crazy. I sit down next to him on the bed. Our hips and legs touch and I lift my hand hesitantly to rub his back. As much as I wish this wasn’t happening, he’s still one of my oldest friends and he’s hurting. 

He sighs and reaches over and grabs my other hand, bringing my wrist to his lips and kissing the delicate skin over my pulse point. Need zings through me and I squeeze my thighs tightly. 

“Thank you,” he whispers against my skin. “Thank you for staying with me.”

My lips turn down into a frown. He doesn’t know this is my goodbye to him. “Noel..,”

He brushes my lips with his fingertips. “Shhhhhh. Let’s not talk about this anymore. I just need to hear you say you love me. That this isn’t going to ruin us.”

I bite my bottom lip. Even though I’m unbelievably pissed at him, I can’t deny the feelings in my heart. I do love him, more than anything else, but I can’t do this. I can’t be the other woman.

Noel’s eyes plead with me to tell him I love him, and that I still need him. 

I pull his fingers away from my lips and then bring both of my hands around to cup his face. He turns his head and kisses the palm of my hand. One last kiss is all I can bring myself to give him. I can’t tell him that I love him, even though I do madly, it will only lead him on. 

Every line and curve of his face I commit to memory. Never again will I hold him like this. 

I lean and press my lips to his and he shuts his eyes. He tenses and tentatively moves his lips with mine. A single tear rolls down his cheek. He feels it too. He knows me well enough to know, this is it for us. 

Noel wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me into him. Panic surges through me. If he starts touching me, it’ll be over. It doesn’t take much from him to turn me on, and I know I can’t let my body overrule my head. 

I break our kiss and lean my forehead against his. “Noel…I can’t.”

He opens his eyes. “Can’t or won’t?”

I shrug and drop my hands into my lap. “Does it really matter?”

“It matters to me, Lane. We can work this out. I just need some time to—”

I shake my head. “No, Noel. I can’t be that girl. I can’t be the girl who is second in your life. You’ve always known this about me. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

He lays his hand on my thigh and my whole body tingles. “Would you’ve come here—been with me, if you’d have known? I wanted you here—with me—and when I saw my shot to make that happen, I took it.”

I cross my legs in attempt to create more space between us, but my body instinctively turns into him. “But you lied to me. I can’t forgive that.”

A harsh breath escapes his lips. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Lane.”

I move his hand off my thigh. “I believe you, but that doesn’t change the situation. I understand you feel like you need to be with Sophie. I do. But I can’t be apart of your life during all this.”

Noel tilts his head. “What are you saying?”

I take a deep breath. “I need you to leave.”

“Lane?”

I shake my head and close my eyes. “Please leave.”

“No. Don’t say that. Don’t shut me out.”

He’s not going to go willingly, and if I don’t end this now I might let him con me into staying with him, being second in his life. I gaze into his eyes try to look as hard as possible. “Noel, I’m done with you.”

He grabs my hand, and I jerk away from his grasp. “No.”

I shove myself off the bed. “Get the fuck out.”

Noel stands and steps in front of me. He leans into me, and I take a step back, bumping against the wall behind me. “You want me to go?”

“Yes.”

His eyes search my face while his warm breath hits my lips. Each of his hands goes on either side of me, effectively pinning me against the wall. Our thighs touch as he pushes against me. I swallow hard and try not to think about how close his body is to mine. His nose traces runs along my chin. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Noel kisses my chin, and I close my eyes. My head tips back. His lips feel amazing and my chest actually heaves. “You can really give this up? Won’t you miss how I make you feel?”

Of course I’ll miss this. The entire time we were apart I missed him. This time won’t be an exception, but for my own sanity, I have to end this. I can’t allow my feelings to be toyed with. It scares me to know I’ve fallen for him again so quickly. If I allow this thing between us to continue and he eventually leaves me for Sophie, I’ll be crushed.

I’m just trying to think ahead.

A tear rolls down my cheek, and I turn my head away from him. “Please stop hurting me.” The words only come out as a whisper, but I know he hears them. 

He flinches, drops his arms—freeing me from his muscular prison and takes a step back. He runs his hand roughly through his hair. “I’m sorry, Lane.”

Before another word can be said between us, he turns on his heel and heads out the door. I jump when the door slams behind him.  

The cheapest flight to New York leaves tonight at nine o’clock. It sucks I have to pack up and leave this room Mike so graciously gave to me for free. Check out is noon and hanging out in the airport for eight hours will suck so much. 

I throw my pajamas in my bag and zip it up. 

I walk toward the door just as a knock startles me. I open the door without looking through the peephole and stop in my tracks. “Mike? What’s up?”

He shoves his sunglasses on top of his head. “Oh, good. You’re ready.”

I tilt my head. “Ready?”

“Yeah, I’m here to take you back to the bus.”

I shake my head. “I’m sorry you wasted your time coming over here, but I’m not going back.”

Mike frowns and his eyes look sad. “Noel knew you would say that. Here.” He hands me a paper. 

I take it from him. “What’s this?”

“Your contract.”

My brow furrows as I read through the very legal document that bares my signature and Noel’s on the bottom. “I don’t understand.”

Mike shrugs. “It basically says if you don’t follow through with seeing this charity project through Black Falcon can sue you.”

“Me?” I nearly shriek. “He wouldn’t…”

“I think you underestimate how far Noel will go to get his way.”

That selfish son-of-a-bitch. Sue me? Is he seriously stooping to this level? I’m going to kill him. I rub my face as my pulse races under my skin. “Where is he? The bus?”

Mike nods and grabs my suitcase. “Come on, I have the Escalade parked out front.”

After we get settled into the SUV and get on the road, I notice Mike glances at me every couple of seconds. His concern is sweet and I appreciate it, but right now I’m too pissed to even speak without yelling. I map out in my mind exactly what I’m going to say to Noel. Every vulgar curse word I know pops into my head at least once. I can’t believe he has the nerve to pull this shit. 

Mike parks near Big Bertha and shuts the engine off. “Take it easy on the guy, Lanie. He’s desperate to keep you around.”

I pick at my nail to keep from looking at Mike’s face. He works for Black Falcon, so of course he’s going to take Noel’s side. “Thanks for the ride, Mike. I hope this won’t take too long. There’s a flight back to New York tonight with my name on it.”

He chuckles. “I won’t hold my breath. Noel usually gets what he wants.”

I roll my eyes as I open the door. “So I’ve heard.”

Mike beats me to the back of the SUV and hands over my luggage. “See you around.”

More than anything, I want to laugh and bet him he’ll be surprised with just how little Noel will get his way with me, but I don’t. I don’t want to sound bitter and childish. Instead, I wave to him and pop the handle on my suitcase.

Trip and Tyke open the door to the bus and step out onto the pavement. Trip notices me and elbows Tyke. They both stand there waiting for me to approach. This could be bad. It looks like they want to guard the door and not let me on. 

I tilt up my chin when I’m within a couple feet from them. I’m getting on that bus to give Noel Falcon a piece of my mind and those two aren’t going to stop me. “Hey, guys. Noel in there?”

Trip grins. “Nice! You’re still coming with us. This should be interesting.”

I shake my head. “I just have some…business with Noel.”

Tyke looks concerned while Trip appears absolutely delighted. 

I run my fingers through my hair and start towards the door. Tyke places a hand tentatively on my forearm. “Are you sure you want to do that, Lanie?”

I stop and tilt my chin up. “I appreciate your concern, Tyke, but I can handle Noel.”

He removes his hand and nods before patting his brother on the back. “Come on, bro. Riff’s not in there, so I think it’s safe to let her in.”

They part and Trip motions me by with a grand sweep of his arm.  

I fling open the door and my suitcase bangs against each step as I make my way up. Noel’s sitting on the edge of one of the captain’s seats strumming his guitar. He doesn’t even bother to help me with my bag as I lug it inside. 

Jerk.

I fold my arms and stand there, ready for a fight, but he just keeps playing that stupid guitar like I’m not even there. He closes his eyes and hums to the melody like he’s trying to figure out the lyrics. I remember him doing this very same thing when we dated before. Noel licks his lips and then slides the bottom one between his teeth. It’s a simple move, but it’s unbelievably sexy. The need to feel his skin on mine causes my pulse to kick up a notch. 

Damn him. He’s doing this to me on purpose.

I reach over and wrap my fingers around the neck of his guitar, cutting off its sound. Noel opens his blue eyes and grins in that sexy way that makes me weak in the knees. “Oh, hey, Lane, I didn’t see you there. You can go ahead and take your stuff on back to the bedroom.”

Is he serious right now? “Do you think this is some kind of game, Noel?”

He rests his arms causally on the guitar—tattoos directly in my line of site—fully on display. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m simply directing a guest, slash employee, where to store her personal belongings. Don’t see much of a game in that.”

I throw my arms up. “You’re unbelievable! You know that? If you think for one minute that you can force me to stay here, you’ve—”

In one swift move, Noel leans the guitar against the wall and stands directly in front of me. Damn these tight—spaced buses. He reaches down and grabs my bag. I try to swat away his hands, but he’s too quick. 

I stay hot on his heels as he starts down the hallway. “Give me back my stuff.”

“No,” he says before he unzips the suitcase, takes two more steps, and then dumps all the contents on the bed.  

The clothes, make-up, and other personal items land in a messy heap on the bed. “You asshole! Why did you do that?”

His eyes meet mine. “Because the sooner you see you aren’t going anywhere the better.”

I snatch the clothing into my arms. Noel smirks at me as he shoves my bag behind his back. I scowl at him. "What's your problem? Give it to me." 

A loud thud sounds in the tiny room as Noel drops the luggage behind him. "Keep being so bossy with, me and I might just give it to you right now." He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

I roll my eyes. "You're crazy. I can't keep up with you and these Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde mood swings you’ve got going on."

He steps so close to me his leg touches mine. "No mood swings, Lane. I'm just making sure you keep your end of the deal."

"How can you expect me to stay here after all this?" I whisper.

Noel grabs the waistband of my jeans and yanks me flush against him. Heat sears through me as he dips his index finger inside my jeans and traces the sensitive skin on my stomach. I squeeze my eyes shut and feel my head tilt back. Damn my stupid body for wanting him.

He chuckles, and my eyes land on his smug face. “See how easy I can turn you on? That’s why I expect you to stay—because you still want this.”

He releases me, and I gasp at the loss of his warmth which makes him smile even bigger. Why does he have to be so damn sexy? It makes the inner battle between my body and my head unwinnable. 

I hug my clothes tight against my chest as Noel steps around me without another word and heads out the door—so much for having a rational conversation with him.

The contract I signed with Center Stage Marketing lies on the bed. It obviously fell out of my bag when Noel decided to dump all of its contents out. 

I lay my stuff on the bed and sit down next to the contract. Legal stuff wasn’t my strong suit in college, but I pick it up and read down through it. It all looked pretty standard except for the last few clauses. One said that if I didn’t fulfill my personal obligation of remaining on tour with Black Falcon for the full two weeks, I put myself at risk for being sued by the band for breach of contract by both Black Falcon and Center Stage. Diana conveniently forgot that little gem of information when she was explaining this. 

I’m not even sure that’s legal, but I did sign it along with Noel and Diana, and I’ve watched enough corny judge television shows to know a signed contract means a lot in court.

The second point says, at the end of the tour, Black Falcon will hand over all rights to the band to Center Stage.

That’s when it occurs to me why Diana brought this contract to me personally. It isn’t exactly on the up and up, and she probably doesn’t want anyone else in the firm knowing about her dirty little deal with Noel to make me stay here. 

Anger boils through me that both of these people trapped me here to get what they want. 

I sigh, then fold the paper up and stuff it into my back pocket. A new found determination pumps through me to show both of them how great at selling myself, I can be. Since they seem to be able to hold me here legally, I’m going to have to suck it up and figure out a way to be around Noel, without letting him crush my heart.