Authors: Stella White
“Yeah?” he asked, a hopeful ring to his voice. Lorna whipped around on her heels and started walking towards the aisles. She knew every corner of the library by heart. Even before she had started working here, this was the place she spent all her free time in and she didn’t have to look at the books to know where to find the one that she was looking for.
Within a few paces she had reached the section of the aisle that contained the authors whose last names began with D. It only took her five-seconds to find Dickens and then spot two copies of the book that she was wanted. She licked her lips quickly and pulled out a hardbound copy of
Great Expectations
. Josh looked at her face and then at the navy blue book in her hands and then at her face again.
“Have you read any Dickens?” she asked him. A few strands of his straight hair had fallen over his left eye and she had an incredible urge to run her fingers through them. Josh blinked at her and she didn’t have to wait for a response.
“You’re in for a treat then” she said and managed a weak smile, perhaps the first one she had presented him with. Without warning he stretched his hand out towards her and grabbed the book out of her hands, and their fingers brushed against each other. Lorna felt an electricity course through her veins when they touched and she jerked her head up to look at him. He looked absolutely unaffected, instead his head hung low as he ran his eye over the first page of Charles Dickens’ masterpiece.
“This looks like scary stuff” he was grinning again. Lorna tried to smile more confidently.
“I’m sure you’ll enjoy it. Plus, you’ll have a lot to write about it in your book report” she offered and licked her lips again out of nervousness. She was so glad that she was being able to have a conversation with him without jumbling up the words.
Josh looked back down at the book and wrinkled his brow again. “Have you read it?” he asked and Lorna couldn’t help but laugh a little at that.
“A couple of times, yeah” she said.
“What if I don’t get it?” he asked and shut the book with a bang. Lorna raised an eyebrow and looked at him. It was the first time that she was able to confidently look at him, without worrying that he might catch her staring. She finally had an excuse to examine in detail the perfection of his face. She could see the look of worry in his eyes.
“I’ll tell you what” she said and saw his eyes widen. She reached out to the shelf again and pulled out the second copy of the book. “Why don’t I re-read the book along with you and we can discuss it along the way or once you’ve finished?” she said and clutched the book tightly to her chest.
“Like a book club!” Josh nearly yelled out, “Really? That would be so great” he added.
“I’d be happy to. It’s one of my favorite books” Lorna said, giggling at the sight of Josh so excited. The fact that she had been the cause for his excitement made her heart flutter.
Before Josh could respond to that she heard a girl’s voice behind her -
“What are you doing here?” and Lorna turned around to find Jessica Owens standing behind her, her eyes fixed on Josh. Jessica Owens, the girl who Lorna herself couldn’t deny was a girl with a million dollar smile. She whipped around to see Josh walk past her and straight to Jessica. She stood apart from them while the two of them exchanged a comfortable hug.
Jessica was in a short yellow jersey dress, a long brass chain hung around her neck while a large tan leather bag was in her hands. Her brunette waves reached her minuscule waist like a shining curtain of hair and her perfect white straight teeth were framed by pouting coral lips. She looked like a delicious summer dessert and Lorna noticed how Josh’s hands lingered on her waist for a few extra seconds.
“I’m just picking up a book” Josh told her while they continued to smile at each other.
“Oh” she laughed in response, “I just wanted to use the library computer. My phone’s battery ran out and I needed to respond to a Facebook message urgently” Jessica said, seemingly unaware that Lorna was standing near them, staring.
“Hey do you want to grab a quick coffee?” Jessica asked and Lorna’s heart sank with a clunk inside her body.
“Sure thing” Josh replied chirpily and Lorna gulped her misery down her drying throat. She saw Josh lightly touch Jessica’s waist as they started to walk away instantly and Lorna kept standing there, staring at their backs.
“Hey! Thanks!” she heard him say just as she was about to turn around. She saw Josh look over her shoulder and wink his right eye as he walked away with Jessica. Lorna kept standing silently, that dreadful feeling of loneliness and regret was filling her heart with every passing second.
*****
Lorna stared at herself in the mirror and blinked. She had spent the past fifteen minutes trying to draw a thick winged outline on her eyelids with a black liquid liner. She smacked her lips to make sure that her bright red lipstick was still intact. The little black dress that she had picked out was one of her favorite ones and she could think of no better outfit for the night. After a lot of deliberation, Lorna had decided that she wanted to attend the party that was being thrown by Jessica Owens to celebrate their college Hockey team’s victory this season. Jessica’s father was the coach, which meant she had a special connection with the team anyway and everybody was invited.
Mimi of course thought it was a bad idea and so did Lorna initially. Ever since Josh McKenna had walked into the library, demanding a book and her heart and then later walked away with his hand on Jessica’s waist; Lorna had been feeling like the whole world was against her. She had a hard time getting dressed for classes, she wasn’t her cheerful self at home with her family and she didn’t really want to discuss the incident with Mimi.
At the last minute however, she changed her mind. She believed that attending this party would be the only way she could get over him. She would be able to see Josh for who he really is and how different the two of them are.
So she stepped into her sequined black kitten heeled shoes and grabbed her black clutch. She had tied her auburn curls to the top of her head in a messy bun and now they fell around the nape of her neck. She tucked a few curls back into her bun, waved a quick goodbye to her mother who was serving dinner to her younger sister and father and then walked out of the house.
“Don’t you think it
’
s time you moved out of home Lorna?” Mimi asked her the moment she stepped out. Lorna gave her friend a quick inspection. She was wearing a pair of faded blue jeans and a silvery blouse.
“Why are you dressed like you’re going to the mall Mimi?” Lorna asked her instead of responding to the question.
“Because I’m almost certain that nobody at that party is going to be rating us on our dress-sense” Mimi said, rolling her eyes.
“Please tell me that you’re not carrying a book” Lorna asked, pointing at the huge canvas bag that Mimi was holding in her hands.
“So what if I am? What if I get bored and have nothing to do?” Mimi asked defensively.
“So then you get drunk out of your mind! This is why nobody wants to talk to us” Lorna said and started walking. She didn’t know why she was blaming Mimi for all her misery, but she was.
Mimi started following her, trying to match her quick pace.
“You mean, this is why Josh McKenna won’t talk to
you
? Our reading habits is why he won’t notice you?” she heard Mimi yell out to her, the words pricking her like a million needles. Lorna turned around to face her friend and she could see that Mimi’s face was as red with anger as her own.
“I didn’t even want to go to this stupid thing. Neither do you, really. I mean look at you!” Mimi said and Lorna directed her gaze to her own clothes.
“You look like you’re trying too hard. I mean this is a college party Lorna, not some kind of film premier” Mimi said and stuck her hand on a hip. Lorna could feel her cheeks flushing with rage and her fingers quivering.
“I’m not forcing you to come!” was all she could scream out.
“Fine!” Mimi yelled back
“Fine!” Lorna mirrored her response and turned on her heels. She could feel a cool breeze ruffle the curls around her face as she started to walk in the direction of Jessica Owens’ house. She clenched her fists and hoped that Mimi would follow her, but she couldn’t hear her friend’s footsteps on the pavement anymore.
*****
The house looked like it was bouncing along with the beats of the music that came pouring out. At least three dozen cars had been parked outside on the curb while countless numbers of people were milling about, plastic glasses of alcohol in their hands.
Lorna tugged at the hem of her dress, to try and pull it down over her knees. She had never felt this self conscious before and she was cursing herself for having driven her only companion away. She squeezed in through a group of her classmates, none of whom seemed to recognize her and reached the front door that was wide open.
She stepped in gingerly and could barely see in the low lights inside the house. The music was too loud and she wanted to cover her ears to block the sound out but decided against it since it would make her look silly. The black dress was definitely a bad idea, Mimi had been right, she was too formally dressed given that a lot of the girls were only in swimsuits.
Lorna looked around her as she began to walk through the house, she recognized a few faces but couldn’t find anybody from her Book Club or library. In a house full of people, she felt completely alone and she could feel tears welling up inside her. She couldn’t remember anymore why this had been a good idea.
Lorna stopped in her tracks when she noticed Jessica in the centre of the room. She was wearing a small purple bikini top and a silky white skirt. Her dark hair was tied back in a ponytail and she had large silver hoops hanging from her ears. That same white toothy grin was plastered on her face as she laughed at what the two boys who were talking to her were saying.
A sudden wave of anger and jealousy overtook her being and Lorna squeezed past the crowd and towards the long table that had been arranged with different kinds of alcohol and towers of plastic cups. She just grabbed the first bottle of beer that she could find and gnawed at its cap with her teeth. The metal cap finally popped open and Lorna stood by herself, in the middle of all that music and that large crowd and tipped her head back and guzzled down half the bottle of beer.
She licked her lips when she stopped for air.
“Hey!” she yelled out to a guy who was walking past her.
“Hey!” she yelled again over the music and grabbed his arm. He stopped in his tracks and looked at her quizzically.
“Is there a pool or something here?” Lorna asked him and he pointed at the other end of the house and walked away.
Lorna started making her way through the crowd again till she reached the glass sliding doors to the backyard. She didn’t need to step out to finally realize that it was a pool party more than a house party. There were more people by the pool than there were inside the house. The music outside was different and louder and everybody was in their swimsuits.
Lorna pressed down her eyes and stepped out in the cool air. She was hoping nobody would notice or recognize her and she could just go back home after the beer. That is until she saw Josh, and all her plans of going home early changed. She had never seen him half-naked before and the effect that it had on her senses was indescribable.
His hair was wet and was slicked back on his head, while his naked torso glistened with moisture, he had clearly been in the pool not too long ago. He was wearing a pair of baggy white shorts, which were wet too and clung to the muscles of his thighs. He was standing with his hands on his hips, and the low lights around the pool silhouetted the strong muscles of his shoulders and his chest and Lorna followed the ridges on his body, till they disappeared down his shorts.
He was moving around a lot, talking and laughing with his friends and Lorna had to weave through the crowd again to continue staring at him. It was when Josh threw back his head in laughter, when the dimples on his cheeks deepened and he placed a hand on his heart that Lorna stood still and her jaw nearly dropped, he was gorgeous.