“Which means she wants something.”
“I know, right? But if she did, she never asked for it. And she’s not usually that subtle.”
No,
subtle
wasn’t a word Jay would have used to describe Austin’s sister, who was the baby of the Fisher family and had been spoiled beyond words. It had been a weight off Austin’s shoulders when she’d gone away to college at the beginning of September. “Maybe she was drunk?”
Austin laughed. “She didn’t sound it. She sounded happy. She met someone.”
If he’d been drinking, Jay would have choked. “Met someone as in more than another sucker to use as a cab and walking bank account?” April’s boyfriends were numerous and short-lived; even the serious ones were more accessories than love interests.
“I got that impression, yeah. Weird, huh?”
“I don’t want to think about who she’d pick as a real boyfriend. Or who’d be into her.” April was such a selfish, amoral bitch that Jay couldn’t picture anyone taking her on long-term unless they were terminally stupid. Or as much of a masochist as he was, except that was different.
The pain April dealt out was emotional and left scars.
“He’s a year ahead of her and wants to be a pediatrician. His name’s Ryan and—brace yourself.” Austin widened his eyes and said dramatically, “He goes to all his classes.”
The green beans were making his hand go numb, but Jay was snickering too much to care. “Is he an alien? He’s got to be. Into studying and April? Those things just don’t go together. And since when did she go for the geeks? I’m not sure her last one could even read. When I said I worked at the library, he thought it meant I’d read every single book on the shelves.”
“I know! It’s really weird. But it sounded like she admires him. She’s going to all her classes too because she doesn’t want him to think she’s lazy.” Austin finished filling a pot with water and put it on the stove. “And he asked her to go home with him for Thanksgiving. She’s e-mailing me some links so I can help her pick out clothes.”
“
There
we go.” Jay knew April had some ulterior motive. “And she wants you to pay for them.”
“Nope. Apparently she got a job on campus, and she’s saving her money.”
“Okay, so maybe
she’s
the alien. Or some faeries came and stole her and left a changeling in her place.”
“I thought that was just babies.”
“She can be kind of an infant sometimes,” Jay said and giggled. That made Austin laugh, and they spent the next ten minutes finishing dinner and poking fun at April. It was so hard to imagine her changing her life around that Jay couldn’t manage it.
“Eat fast,” Austin told him as they picked up their forks. “I’ll drag you out the door with half your meal still on your plate if I have to.”
“Are you going to tell Liam about April?”
Austin shrugged. “Sure, why not?”
Even after four or five months with the three of them working on building a relationship outside their sessions, it was difficult for Jay to accept that Liam was interested in the mundane details of their lives and not just being polite. Austin’s job at the doctor’s office and Jay’s at the library weren’t boring to them, but why would Liam care that the near-mythical Alison Brearton, who’d had a book checked out for twelve years, the fines building until they’d reached the maximum the library could impose, had finally wandered in one day and returned
The Murder of Roger Ackroyd?
April, though… Liam didn’t like April at
all
. Bringing her up would probably sour the mood before the session started.
“Because you want Liam in a good mood. Tell him afterward but not before. Or in the morning right before we leave.”
The Friday sessions used to end with Liam shooing them out the door, their asses glowing, but now they usually slept over, keeping a few clothes in one of Liam’s closets and a complete set of toiletries in the spare bathroom.
Liam hadn’t gone that far with them, but he didn’t stay over at their apartment often. The three of them in a queen-size bed was a tight fit; Liam’s king-size worked much better. Jay sometimes wished he could have an out-of-body experience and float up to the ceiling to watch them use every inch of that bed. The logistics of them all trying to get off could be complicated, physically and emotionally. Liam had once strained his shoulder trying to fuck Austin and get his mouth on Jay’s cock at the same time, and there were inevitably moments when someone felt left out of the action. That was an ongoing issue they didn’t discuss as much as push past it.
Complicated, yes, but when it worked, the three of them joining to create something passionate, tender, or just erotic as hell, it left Jay feeling as euphoric as a whipping would.
“It’s not even that much to tell,” Austin protested. “I mean, it’s good news more than anything. But yeah, you’re probably right.”
“Probably?” Jay pouted and fluttered his eyelashes, resting his chin on his hand. “Probably? I’m offended. Of
course
I’m right. I know exactly what I’m talking about, and you should be hanging on my every word.”
Austin gave him an amused look. “Okay.”
“I mean it,” Jay told him. “In fact, you should just let me make all your decisions forever.”
“Are you on crack?” Austin asked, his grin wide enough that Jay felt his own face mirroring it. “You would hate that
so much
.”
“Yeah.” Jay snickered. “Guess my chances of becoming a famous actor are pretty low. I’d better stick to being a librarian.”
“Good. Now eat your fish.” Austin pointed his fork at Jay’s plate. “You mean you aren’t going to start taking acting classes?”
“In my copious free time?” Jay quickly took a big bite of salmon before Austin could comment again. After swallowing, he added, “I like dioramas. Plus I think there’s something to be said for playing to your strengths.”
That got him a wink. “You’ll be able to do that plenty tonight. No one begs for more the way you do when you think Liam’s about to ease up and you’re desperate. You babble. It’s sweet.”
There were plenty of times when Jay had done just that, longing for one more slash of a strap against his ass, another minute with weighted clamps crushing and tugging at his nipples until the pure, hot agony burned away everything holding him back and set him free. It didn’t mean that was all he was good for, though he knew Austin hadn’t intended it as anything but a teasing joke. “Hey!”
“What?” Austin held up his hands, all innocence. “You’re a great sub. Liam loves you.”
Suddenly uncomfortable with the way the conversation was going, though he couldn’t pinpoint why, Jay set down his fork. “He loves both of us, but it’s not just about how we make him feel in a session.”
Austin had gone quiet. “I know,” he said finally, but it was one of the least convincing statements Jay had ever heard out of him.
“Try again.”
“Why?” Austin sighed and used his fingers to pick up his last green bean. “Anyway, we’ve got to get going.”
Jay slapped his hand down on the table—not loud enough to be scary, even if it was unexpected, but enough to get Austin’s attention. “We can talk about it here, or I can bring it up when we get to Liam’s.”
The horrified look Austin gave him made him feel guilty immediately, but this was important. It wasn’t something Jay could just let go. “You wouldn’t,” Austin said.
“I would, and you know it. I still might.” Not that Jay wanted to freak Austin out further. It was the truth, though, and he was a firm believer that the truth was vital in relationships. There was no way he’d chance screwing things up by being too scared to talk about them. “We can talk while we get ready, and in the car if you want, but it’s definitely happening.”
“Fine,” Austin said and shoved his chair back. “What do you want to hear?” He sounded angry, which was so not Jay’s intention.
“Hey,” he said. “Come on. I’m on your side here.”
Austin carried his plate to the kitchen, and Jay followed him. “Doesn’t feel like it,” Austin muttered.
Jay waited until Austin had set down his plate, then wrapped both arms around his waist from behind and held on.
“I am. Totally on your side. Talk to me.”
“I don’t… I don’t know how to put it into words, okay? It’s not that I won’t, I guess… I need more time to think about the whole situation.”
The request was reasonable, but Jay hesitated before sighing with resignation. He turned Austin around so he could kiss him, needing the intimacy after their disagreement, minor though it’d been. Austin’s lips were firmly closed at first, but Jay knew just how to coax them open, and before long Austin was kissing him back, his hands clutching Jay’s shoulders, his mouth warmly eager.
The kiss ended with them staring at each other, Austin’s expression a blend of pleading and stubbornness.
“You need to give me time,” Austin repeated. “This thing we’ve got with Liam…it’s fragile. It matters to me. I don’t want to bring it down around us by saying something stupid.”
“It matters to all of us,” Jay pointed out. “We knew going in it wasn’t going to be easy adjusting, but we said we’d talk about it if any of us started freaking out. It’s starting to worry me that we never have.”
Austin shrugged free of Jay’s embrace and turned to pick up his plate. He rinsed it under the faucet, his shoulders tense. “You
want
me to freak out?”
“Who said it’d be you? Liam’s had more to adjust to than us.” And more to lose if people found out—and that was another subject not up for discussion when it should be, in Jay’s opinion. He wasn’t naive. The Dom/sub arrangement would make eyebrows rise, but the threesome aspect and the difference in their ages would turn surprise to shock, even anger. Hell, no one even knew Liam was bi yet except Patrick, their former Dom, who’d pushed the three of them together like a leather-clad Cupid.
“Yeah, but Liam—he’s got it together. Not that I think he’s perfect…”
“Just really close?” Jay knew Austin felt that way, and knew it was complicated as hell. “I don’t want anyone to freak out, but if you are, it’s not unexpected. That’s all I’m saying.”
Austin swiveled to check the clock. “Shit, we’re going to be late if we don’t go now.” He kissed Jay quickly—it felt like an apology—and added, “I’ll think about it, I promise. Once I figure out what’s going on in my head, you’ll be the first to know.”
As they went to get their coats, Jay thought that would have to be good enough for now. Besides, he had a pretty good idea of what was troubling Austin. He wanted more time with Liam.
They both did.
Chapter Two
“Cutting it a bit close, aren’t we?” Liam asked as he closed the door behind them.
“More than a bit,” Jay agreed cheekily and hung up his coat. “Brr. It feels colder than the middle of October. This morning it was so gray I thought it might snow.”
“Wouldn’t be the first time it snowed this early,” Austin said.
“Personally I’d rather it waited until after Thanksgiving.” Liam frowned impatiently. He’d had a mildly stressful day at work, nothing out of the ordinary, but he’d made it through the day only by focusing firmly on the evening’s activities. The fact that he’d spent the last fifteen minutes checking the clock made him cross.
Jay snickered. “You might be able to control us, but the weather? Don’t think so, Liam.”
“Jay—” Austin began, but Liam was already moving, every instinct he had telling him to curb Jay quickly before this got out of hand.
The line between being subs and being Liam’s partners had blurred since they’d started sharing a bed and, for want of a better word, dating. Outside a clearly defined space of time once or twice a week when Liam was their Dom, not just their lover, he was happy enough for them to call him by name and be relaxed and at ease around him.
Well, maybe when they were in bed, he had a tendency to take charge, but that didn’t seem to bother them, and really, someone had to organize events. The trouble was that now he was free to admit what he did with and to them turned him on, and not just because he got off on dominating them. Sex was inevitably linked in his mind to the sessions. Ceding control of either to his two subs, beautifully obedient and responsive as they were, didn’t appeal.
Though he had to confess to a certain curiosity about being fucked by them one day. He’d never shared that possibility. Too potentially disruptive when things between them were balanced so precariously.
Yes, the lines had blurred—but if Jay thought he could saunter in, all mouth and attitude, as if he were immune from discipline until he got naked, Liam was only too happy to educate him on the respect due a Dom.
He was rarely rough with them, always careful to prepare them for what he had planned. Sometimes he chafed against the self-imposed restrictions, but Austin and Jay mattered too much for him to take any risks.
Of the two of them, though, it was Austin who was most vulnerable, whose limits Liam only pushed at gently.
When it came to Jay’s limits, Liam was always well inside them. He had room to work, and he intended to go as far as he wanted.
He wrapped his hand tightly around Jay’s throat, knowing how aroused any form of breath play got Jay, though giving Jay pleasure wasn’t high on his list of priorities in that moment.
“Did you have something you wanted to say to me before I deal with your attitude, Jay?”
Jay stood utterly still. He didn’t struggle at all, but the frantic flutter of his pulse against Liam’s fingertip told Liam everything he needed to know. “We’re still dressed,” he said hoarsely, the words making his throat vibrate against Liam’s palm. Liam waited, giving him a chance to salvage a little of the situation, and Jay added, “Sir.”
“Your state of dress or undress is unimportant,” Liam told him. “Whether you’re under my roof is unimportant.” He tightened his grip and saw Jay’s pupils dilate. “You will show me the respect I’m due. I know you understand.”
Jay swallowed, his throat contracting in Liam’s grip. “I do, Sir.”
“Then I expect an apology.”
“I’m sorry, Sir.” Jay’s voice was barely above a whisper.
“Good, you should be. I’d like you to be quiet now.”