"Where you been, Lori Jean? I been worried sick." She come out on the platform and stood with her arms crossed in front of the trailer door.
"I thought maybe a walk in the woods would clear my head, break my fever good," I said.
"Why, that's crazy talk. You best come in and lie down a spell."
"Yes, Mama," I said.
"And just look at you, plumb full a' dirt. Looks like you rolled in them woods."
I didn't make it over to Mz. Hawkins's that day. Mama made me stay in and rest. Fed me bread in a bowl with milk and sugar sprinkled on top. But it was hard acting sick when I wasn't. All the while, Mama was busy making arrangements for us to bury Iris Anne. The day of the funeral was my birthday. I was ten. Mama took care of everything. She got the church folks to let us bury Iris Anne in the cemetery plot right on top of MeeMaw. They said we could put her there on account there was plenty a' room. They was probably right. Ray said MeeMaw was six feet under. If he was telling the truth for once, might be room enough for me someday 'cause Melvin said Iris Anne was only twenty-one inches long. Six feet, that's a lot of room. Might could put us all there.
At the cemetery we all crowded around in a circle. Everyone but Lexie. She didn't get out of the hospital 'til the next day. I think Melvin planned it so she wouldn't be there for the burying. He knew Lexie wouldn't want to see little Iris Anne packed down into the ground, when just a few weeks before she was carrying that little baby around in her belly, feeling her kick. The preacher come and give a blessing.
"Lord, we commit this child to eternal peace. May she rest in your loving care, residing safely in your arms for all eternity. May you comfort those who would prefer that she remain and remind them of your promise that we shall all meet again in everlasting paradise."
We was all pretty much crying by then. Even Mama. I wondered why she didn't cry over little Paulie, who probably would have been a right fine brother to me. Maybe she was so grieved by my real pa running off, she couldn't think straight about anything else. We laid out some flowers on top of the dirt mound for Iris Anne. Then we sung "Amazing Grace" 'cause we didn't have no hymnals with us, and we knew the words to that song. Then we left. The sun wasn't shining at all and black clouds was rolling in. Seems sadness was everywhere that day. Guess even heaven didn't like taking no baby girl away so soon, even though it was the one getting her.
Mama said we'd do something for my birthday later, but we wasn't fixing to have no regular birthday party or nothing like Carolee had herself 'fore she died. We was still getting over the fire and Iris Anne's passing.
I spent that morning helping Mz. Hawkins like I always did on weekends. I knew it was the perfect chance for me to ask for her help in taking the money back. I was hoping she'd feel a bit sorrowful for us, what with all the troubles our family was having; that she'd take pity on us and help me. Plus, it being my birthday, she might like to do something nice for me. Never know.
"Mz. Hawkins," I said, "supposin' somebody was in trouble and needed help and was real sorrowful for their trouble. Would you help 'em?"
"Well, I always been a Christian lady. It'd be my duty to help now, wouldn't it?"
"That's what I figure," I said. "See, I need me some help, Mz. Hawkins, but I don't rightly want you to ask me no questions 'cause it's real serious trouble."
"Well now, Lori Jean, I can't rightly help unless you tell me how it is I can help you."
"Well, Mz. Hawkins, I just need you to drive me on over to Decatur for a piece is all."
"I can't be gallivanting all over Georgia without knowing why now, can I? Hardly seems right."
"But it's a secret, Mz. Hawkins. I ain't told no one."
"You can tell me, Lori Jean. I'm not going to tell anyone. I'm going to help you, remember?" She was making it sound so easy. I should of asked her weeks ago when Ray was in the hospital. We finished folding up the laundry. I stacked it up nice and put it in the wicker basket.
"Reckon I should take this on up to the linen closet, Mz. Hawkins?"
"Oh, just leave that be, Lori Jean. I'll get it myself later." She was being so nice. It was my lucky day and here it was my birthday, too. Things was gonna be perfect. Mama was home baking a cake and getting everything ready for a nice supper with Aunt Lexie and Uncle Melvin and the twins. Little Irl was home from the hospital and learning to walk again with these braces they put on his legs. The doctors said he was one tough little fella. He was gonna be fine. Might even be able to do without braces someday. Mama said Lexie would get over losing Iris Anne eventually, probably have herself another baby even.
"Nothin' like a new little baby to help heal wounds, Lori Jean," she said.
"'Course that won't ever replace little Iris, but all babies bring their own joy into this world. God knows we need some, after all we been through this year," Mama said that morning 'fore I left for Mz. Hawkins's.
Now the day could really be perfect. I'd take that sack of money back to the mill and go on home to a fine birthday supper. If we was lucky Ray wouldn't get too drunk. He was back to drinking most every night again. He started up again when the doctor wouldn't give him no more pain pills; said he didn't need 'em no more. Mama was beside herself. But I wasn't going to let his drinking spoil my day. No sirree. Now, if only Mz. Hawkins would help me, then things could be perfect. I'd have me a really fine day.
"Go on, Lori Jean. Tell me why we're going to Decatur. I ain't got all day," Maybelle said. As much as I wanted to tell her and get on with it, something inside held me back.
"Lori Jean, didn't you tell me today's your birthday?"
"Yes, ma'am," I said.
"Well then, shake a leg. Don't you want to get home to your family?"
"I surely do. Mama's havin' a supper for me with Uncle Melvin and Aunt Lexie and the twins. We're havin' cake and maybe ice cream, too."
"Well, there you go. You need to tell me what's what and be done with it, girl."
"Mz. Hawkins, I need you to take me on over to the Scottsdale Cotton Mill so's I can take the money back I found in a flour sack the day of the fire." I spit it all out in one breath.
"You found what?" Mz. Hawkins's mouth dropped open.
"I found the payroll money that was took from the mill. Ray done stole it when he was drunk, Mz. Hawkins. I got to get it back so we can be a family."
"You mean that money they're giving a five-hundred-dollar reward for?"
"Yes, ma'am. That very money."
"Lori Jean, you wait right here. I'll be right back. I'll just make a telephone call and clear all this up. That's just what I'll do. You wait right here. Just one little telephone call," she said.
Mz. Hawkins got up and went out to her kitchen. I knew her phone was out there hung on the wall. At first, I was sorely relieved. But then, I got me a bit nervous. I started remembering all the things I should of remembered 'fore I told her my secret. Like how much she liked money and never could seem to get enough. And five hundred dollars' reward was a whole bunch of money to get. And I was remembering what Aunt Lexie told me at the fair about her causing more trouble than a hurricane that hits in the night. The more I thought about it, the more nervous I got. I knew I'd made me a big mistake. I sneaked around the corner and seen Maybelle take the phone off the hook. She put her finger on the big black dial and dialed the first number. Then she dialed the second number. Only two more to go and whoever she was calling would be on the line. As much as I wanted to, I just couldn't chance that who she was calling was somebody who would help me. I run outside to where them men strung that rubber line up to her house and I tried to yank it clean out of the box it was hooked up to, but it wouldn't budge. I pulled as hard as I could, but it didn't do no good. Whoever hooked it up the day they fixed it oughta get a raise for sure. They done a really good job.
Chapter Twenty
I took off running to our old place to dig up the money. A storm had been brewing all morning and just about then it got real nasty. Streaks of lightning flashed across the sky and it weren't long the thunder started in. Then the rain come down and drenched me good. I wasn't having me a very good day after all.
When I got to the outhouse I slipped down on my knees and used my hands to dig at the muddy ground, hoping to get at the flour sack stuck in the hole. But all I found was bits and pieces of it and a couple a' soggy ten-dollar bills. I was just plumb full of panic and my mind wasn't working good. Then I remembered I'd moved the money that day Mz. Hawkins brought me home from the hospital when Iris Anne died. I put it there in the woods in the hollow of an old tree trunk. I thought I'd been right careful that day to pick up every stray bill that fell out of that pitiful sack. I seen now I missed some and I left big soggy pieces of what was left of that flour sack, too. They was stuck in the muddy dirt all around the edge of the shed. I gathered up bits and pieces of the flour sack and what money was there and stuffed it into my overhauls.
"Where's the rest a' it, you little shit?" A big thunder of a voice boomed out and I looked up at the black sky above me, fixing to see who coulda said it. Was it God? If it were, he was plenty mad 'cause he done said the poop word!
"I said where's the rest a' it?" It was Ray. He come staggering out of the trees on the far side of the outhouse.
"You told me that sack burned, girl." He come at me so fast I near froze in my tracks.
"You lied," he said. He grabbed hold of my shoulder. "Where's the money?" He grabbed a fistful of my hair, wound it tight around his hand and jerked my head back so hard I bit my tongue.
"Where is it?" he screamed into my good ear. 'Fore I had me a chance to answer, he flung me to the ground. A big chunk of my hair got left with him. It stuck right there to his fingers. His hands was all full of mud. He'd probably been digging round the outhouse to loosen it up so's he and Uncle Melvin could move it over to our place, and he musta seen some of them bills I left behind.
"I come here, Lori Jean, mindin' my own business, fixin' to get this here outhouse moved, and what do you think I find me?" he asked. "Huh? What'd I find, girl?" I didn't answer. I started scrambling to my feet.
"You lied to me, girl! You hid that money, and all this time you been lyin' to me. All this time I been workin', movin' them trailers, bustin' my back, and you been sittin' on my money." Ray come at me and kicked me straight in the belly. A pain cut through me so sharp I thought his foot was a knife. It cut into me so bad I couldn't talk. I couldn't tell him I kept it so I could take it back. So's we'd be a family.
He kicked me again. I started to moan something awful; it hurt me so bad. He kicked me over and over on my backside real low below my waist. I throwed up all over the ground.
"Ray," I whispered, "I was takin' it back so…I was…"
He jerked me to my feet. More pain shot down my spine and into my legs.
"…takin' it back so we could be a family and you wouldn't go to the chain gang…so you wouldn't get in no trouble…'"
"'I was takin' it back so you wouldn't get in no trouble…'" he mimicked me. "Trouble is what you're gonna get if I don't get my money. Where is it?" He punched me hard in the belly three times in a row. I didn't know a person could throw up as hard as I did then. It come outa me so fast it went flying through the air like water shooting out a garden hose.
"I hid it," I said, but it come out real soft; don't know if he heard. Snot and blood come out, too.
"I hid it. But I'll git it for you. I will. Let me go, Ray! Let me go! I'll git it for you," I said over and over but them words still come out so quiet, they was hardly even a whisper.
"Let's go," he said.
I limped about trying to remember where the money was with Ray at my heels. My mind was playing this trick on me and wouldn't tell me which part of them woods I hid it. I stumbled from this place to that place to another place and dug with my fingers at all of them, but couldn't find the sack.
"I can't remember, Ray," I said. "It's here somewhere, it is. I just can't remember."
"You're lyin! Git me that money!"
"Honest, Ray, I ain't lyin'," I said. "I ain't. I promise you, I ain't."
"Give me that money!" Ray beat at my face. He punched me like I seen them cowboys do in the movies. I keeped landing on my backside each time he swung at me. But every time I hit the ground, Ray grabbed me up and hit me again. I felt my jaw crack. And when I tried to tell him one more time I wasn't lying, my mouth didn't work. I reached up to touch it. It was wide open and my chin just dangled like one a' them ornaments hung from a tree. Bits of my teeth fell into my hand and I coughed up some blood. My ears roared like them waterfalls I visited once with MeeMaw at Tallulah Falls. I couldn't hear what Ray was saying no more, neither. I seen him forming words on his lips, but my ears didn't work, not even my good one. Strange thing, the beating Ray was giving me was wearing him down. I could tell he was breathing hard by the way his chest was moving up and down, and he was staggering about in a circle trying to catch his breath. That was my chance.
I took off running and kept going 'til my legs give out and I dropped down in the tall grass by the creek. The ground was so soggy, my shoulders and feet sunk right in. I curled up on my side and rocked my tummy and sucked in that Georgia red clay 'til it clung like perfume that wouldn't let go.