I manage to find some rubber gloves under the sink, and half a roll of kitchen paper. Never in my life did I think I would ever be picking up dog shit, but here I am. Fuck me. He does bigger shits than me. I gag as I practically have to bicep curl the massive log. He watches me the entire time, breathing heavily like the dirty old fucker he is. I lob it down the loo, and flush. I bin the gloves and bleach my hands, although I feel like I need a full body fumigation. My life just hit whole new lows.
“Right, that’s it Gaz. We’re going for a walk.” Gary hates exercise, in any way, shape or form. Hates it. Except shagging. He likes shagging. Good lad.
I clip his lead on, and he throws himself on the floor.
“Dude, you are walking a fine line.” I point at him. For fucks sake. I grab some treats from the kitchen, and what do you know, as soon as he hears the packet he’s up and standing right behind me.
“Oh no. You have to work for it, you fat fuck.”
I’m throwing treats like a ball for Gaz. This is the only way I can get him to move. I had him out here a few days ago, and an old lady told me that I should be ashamed of myself, for allowing him to get so fat. He was like this when I got him! Of course he’s fat, all he does is eat and sleep. He also likes the ladies. He’s a total pussy magnet. Even ice queen Lilly likes him. He laps that shit up.
I’m crouching down, and in the process of trying to get him to come back to me, rather than just sit down, when a long pair of legs comes into sight, clad in those tight black gym trousers. My eyes travel up slowly, damn, those are some long legs. My eyes take in an athletic body in a hoody, and when I move to her face, I smile. She pulls her earphones out, and I can hear the heavy rock music blaring through them from here.
“Molly.” Not going to lie, she’s looked better. I mean, I still would, but the au naturel look isn’t my thing.
I haven’t seen her since she picked me up from the police station last week. Molly is…well, Molly, and I guess our friendship is an odd one. I don’t usually fuck a girl more than three times unless she’s a hooker, and after that, I usually don’t hear from them again. I’ve fucked Molly a lot. Things got out of hand, and I had to cut her off, but I needed her to be the one to walk away from me, so I pushed her away monumentally. I did shit I’m not proud of, and believe me, she’s the only person in the world that has ever made me feel an ounce of shame.
I didn’t think I’d see her again anytime soon, but sometimes life throws you curve balls that make everything else pale into insignificance.
I remember being at the club, actually doing some work for once, when my phone rang…
“Molly?” I answered.
“Hugo!” She was crying, hysterical, beyond comprehension crying.
“Molly. What’s wrong?” She didn’t answer me, as she heaved deep breaths. “Sweetness, you need to tell me what’s wrong.”
“Lilly.” She gasped. “Lilly’s had a crash.”
“Shit, where is she?”
I can hear her muffled sobs, where her hand is clearly pressed over her mouth. “St Georges.” She manages to say.
“And where are you?”
“Home. George just called.” Her voice is so small and broken, my chest clenches hard. “You know I would never… but please…”
“I’m on my way.” I hung up the phone and left the club, ignoring everyone on my way out.
I hopped into the Lambo, which was parked right outside the club, as always. I floored it to her flat in a symphony of blaring horns and tire squeal.
When I saw Molly, I thought my knees might buckle. She opened the door, and threw herself into my arms. I’d never seen her look so broken. Her hair was a mess, her face streaked and blotchy from tears. Molly didn’t have the warrior front that Lilly had, but she had this quiet kind of strength to her. That strength was nowhere to be seen.
“I asked if she was okay, and George wouldn’t answer me.” She sobbed.
Shit. I needed to call Theo, but she needed me right then, and without George or Harry, or her usual vast network of people around her, I was all she had.
I stroked her hair. “It will be fine Sweetness. We’ll go to the hospital. There’s no point in getting yourself worked up until you know the facts.”
When we did finally get to the hospital, I wanted to walk back out. If I thought Molly was broken, my best friend was so much worse. I’m not good in those situations, never have been. Molly sat with him, and held his hand, but he was pretty much unresponsive. Lilly died five minutes after he brought her in. Pulled her from the wreck himself, and drove like a mad man to get her here. She was resuscitated, but her injuries were pretty bad. It was still touch and go.
Judging by the state he was in, she’d lost a lot of blood. I told them I would go and get him clean clothes. There was nothing I could do here. Just as I reached the doors to A&E Molly called my name. I turned to her, and she threw her arms around my neck. I wrapped my arms round her waist and squeezed her.
“Thank you.” She whispered. “You’re a good friend.” She managed a small, very false smile and pulled away, making her way back to Theo.
Friend. Other than Theo the word wasn’t one I often used with people, but I would do anything for Molly, the same way as I would do anything for Theo. She was my friend, even if I didn’t deserve her.
I spent the next few weeks picking Molly up and taking her to the hospital when she couldn’t use George’s car. Truthfully, I would have offered to buy her a car, but I enjoyed our banter far too much. I liked giving her a lift. I missed hanging out with her if I was honest with myself. We had great sex, no fucking amazing sex, but we also had fun. Shit, doesn’t that sound so pussy whipped. Lilly of course, pulled through, got engaged to Theo and everyone lived happily ever after.
“Hey. Are you supposed to be walking that dog?” Molly interrupts my thoughts.
“Uh, kind of.”
She whistles at him. “Gary.” Fucker leaps up and throws himself at her feet. She squats down and pats his massive head.
“Prick.” I mutter.
She glances up at me, a wide smile on her face. I don’t know what it is about her that kicks me in the nuts so damn hard every time she smiles. Any time she’s near me, my cock turns into a fucking baseball bat. Hey, she may be my friend, but I’m only male. Just because one head knows she’s off limits, doesn’t mean the other does, especially when said head has had a taste already.
The no touching rule is actually pretty easy to enforce seeing as Molly isn’t interested. Thank fuck for that, because I have shit all restraint when it comes to women, especially this woman. We resolved our issues, but I still fucked her over. I showed her just how tainted and corrupt I can be. Let’s just say, she hasn’t wanted to touch my cock since. It may seem like a dick move. Okay, so fucking a hooker in front of her is without doubt a dick move, but I honestly had my reasons, which made complete sense to me at the time. She told me she liked me, liked me liked me…and that is a problem. I like to think of Molly as my sole selfless act. I could have kept fucking her, had my fill, let her believe that there was some good to be found in me, but I didn’t. I made sure she realised that there was no good to be found, because as much as I respect Molly and enjoy her company, I will never change. Molly deserves better. She knew all along that I wasn’t good enough for her, I just gave her the shove she needed to drop my arse. I needed her not to want to fuck me, because god knows, I can’t say no.
“He just takes the piss out of you.” She says. “Don’t you Gary.” She coos.
“You think? Fucker just took a shit on my rug.”
She laughs. Hard. She laughs until she rocks backward and ends up sprawled on her arse. I scowl at her. “It’s not funny. I almost puked.” She laughs even harder, until tears are streaming down her face.
“Fuck. That is just too much.” She gasps. “That dog is a legend.” He climbs on her lap, wiggling his little stump of a tail and shaking his fat arse.
“Yeah? You want him? Because at this rate he’s going to a rescue centre.” I tell her. “And you know what they do in rescue centres Gaz?” He looks up at the sound of his name. “They castrate everything. Those gnads? Bye bye.”
“Ah, you are so mean.” Molly starts to get up, still giggling. I hold out my hand, and she takes it. I pull her to her feet, and she ends up standing inches away from me. Her eyes meet mine, holding my gaze, as something crosses her expression. A slight blush creeps across her accentuated cheek bones. Fuck, she’s gorgeous. I don’t get pussy stunned often, but there’s just something about her. I don’t know what though. I mean, not to be a prick, but I’ve slept with hotter women, and I’ve slept with some of the most skilled hookers you can find. It’s just… her. I’m feeling a very real urge to shove my hand in my pants right now, you know, just to check that I still have a cock, and didn’t just grow a pussy as I thought that.
“Thanks.” She whispers. It takes me a dazed moment to realise that I still have hold of her hand. I release her, and she steps back.
“No problem.” I manage to respond. No problem? What the fuck? “I take it you’re going to this party tonight?” I ask, changing the subject.
“You sound thrilled about it.” She smiles wryly. “And, I’m maid of honour. Of course I’m going.”
“Just checking. I need at least one person there who’s not all wedding obsessed. That shit freaks me out.” I grunt.
She grins. “Don’t worry. I’m sure there will be plenty of fresh meat for you to choose from.”
“Well, you know that the best man and the bridesmaid are traditionally supposed to get it on.” I wiggle my eyebrows at her.
She rolls her eyes. “They are not
supposed
to get it on. Anyway, on that note, I’m going to continue my run.”
“Hey, you should come running with me some time. I think you’d enjoy the view.” I wink.
Her eyes skirt down my body teasingly. “You know, I think I would. I might just take you up on that.”
I’m still laughing as she pops her earphones back in and jogs away from me. Damn her arse looks good.
It turns out this engagement party isn’t all that awful. I mean, it’s pretentious, but then I suppose there are certain expectations that have to be met. They could have picked a better venue. There’s enough chandeliers and old looking shit in here to start a fucking antique shop. Give me strobe lights and strippers in cages over this any day.
I managed to skip the dinner part. Sit down meals aren’t really my style. Plus, Theo never invites me to those things, because I’m pretty much guaranteed to seriously offend at least one person. It’s not my fault they can’t handle me. I refuse to be polite to, or make pointless conversation with twats. So, I skipped that shit, and now the party is just about getting started. At least it will do now I’m here, and god do they need me.
Theo is sitting with me at the bar, because Lilly is dancing with George on the dance floor. Apparently she refuses to act ‘coupley’, because the entire notion of an engagement party makes her sick. I know this because she said this to him as I was sat right here next to him. I kind of want to high five her for not buying into all this bullshit, but I also feel a little bit bad for him. She would happily hop a plane to Vegas, and yet he’s the one who wants a proper wedding. She’s making him look like a total pussy. It’s brilliant.
He’s not such a pussy that he organised this shit though. Apparently Cat threw a wobbly, and demanded he let her organise an engagement party, and Theo being Theo, indulges his sister in whatever she likes. He also gives her free reign with his credit card. Bad idea.
The place is heaving. There must be well over five hundred guests here, and yet, I have no idea who most of them are. Engagement party my arse, this is just fucking bragging rights. ‘Look what I’m tapping.’
I really can’t believe he’s doing this shit. I have been telling him so for the last half hour.
He gestures the barman over and orders a scotch.
“You sure you wouldn’t rather have a Cosmopolitan to go with your vagina?” I ask. He throws me an exasperated look. “I’ll even get them to put an umbrella and a sparkler in it for you.”
He says nothing, but offers me his middle finger. I laugh.
I glance around the room, scouting for pussy. There are a few possibilities. I can’t help but look at Lilly on the dance floor. Her and George look like professional dancers, well I guess he is a professional dancer. Damn that girl is hot. She pretty much defines sex, all flaming red hair, and toned curves. No wonder Theo put a ring on it. The fucker won’t do better than that.
I get smacked in the back of the head. “The fuck?”
“Stop eye fucking my girl, you prick.” Theo says without even looking at me.
“I wasn’t. I was admiring George’s moves.”
“Wow, I thought for sure, you’d never give up the pussy.” He comments.
“Fuck you. As if.” I snort. “I seriously need some though.”
He glances toward me, a shit eating grin on his face. “You having a dry spell?”
I roll my eyes. “Seriously? Don’t ask stupid questions. I got some this morning.”
“Oh yeah, anyone I know?” He narrows his eyes at me.
“No it wasn’t fucking Molly. I told you, she wouldn’t touch me with someone else’s now.” Between him and Lilly it’s like matchmaker central around here. Theo keeps telling me to ‘tie that shit down’. Pussy. Lilly keeps telling me that she’ll break my face if I go near Molly, and is setting her up with the surgeon.
“Well from what I hear, you still have a thing for her.” He cocks an eyebrow.
I shrug. “If by ‘a thing’ you mean I want to blow my load balls deep in her, then yeah, I have a thing for her.”
“Fuck, you’re an animal.” He laughs.
“Ah, don’t pretend you want me any other way, Princess.” I wink and blow him a kiss. He just shakes his head.
Lilly appears behind him, wrapping her arms around his neck, and running her hands down his chest.