Rush of Innocence (Rush Series #1) (17 page)

Chapter 9

Rush Drayton didn’t call that week or
the week after. Every passing day caused the pain in her heart to solidify into
a hard cement core. What had she done wrong? She cringed every time she
remembered how she’d begged him and he’d just walked away.
Every
insecurity
she’d ever had was raised to the surface. Maybe he needed
someone more in his league. She’d thought briefly that maybe her father had
gotten to him, but tossed it aside. She couldn’t see Rush Drayton being
intimidated by anyone.

As
she lie in bed at the end of the third week without him, pain sliced through
her chest and the tears she’d refused to shed throughout the three weeks slid
heedlessly down her cheeks. She missed him. She missed his comfort and concern.
She missed his gentleness. She missed his touch and his soft lips against hers.
How was she supposed to move past him? He was the ultimate man. Was she
supposed to now just make do with someone else?

Her
father was happy to have her home and to have things back to normal… his
normal, anyway. The stained-glass windows had been replaced and there’d been no
further attempts on either of them. Maybe the threat had passed. He’d gotten
cleared by his doctors and had returned to work, so he was happy. Her bedroom
had been sorted and her belongings put back in their proper place, with the
exception of her paintings. Her injuries from the attack had all healed, and
only if you looked closely could you still see the faint yellowing of bruises
around her eyes and nose.

She
got up everyday and dressed. She went downstairs and picked at her breakfast as
her father talked about whatever was coming up in his day. She went to work and
tried to remember the passion she’d once felt for her beloved artwork. She went
to the museum and sat for hours in the atrium, but found no solace. She felt
empty… hollow. She told herself repeatedly to just get over it. She’d only
known him for a matter of weeks. But the man had seriously rocked her world and
knocked her off-kilter. She found sleep evasive and eating a chore she avoided.
It was all starting to catch up with her as there were dark circles under her eyes
and her weight was in a steady decline.

It
was now Saturday and she was once again sitting at the breakfast table with her
father, picking at the food on her plate… or at least pushing it around on her
plate. She found the mere thought of actually putting the food into her mouth
repulsive. She could hear her father rambling at the other end of the table but
wasn’t really paying any attention to what was being said.

“Trinity
Allura
Grace!
Are you listening to me?” her father
said sharply.

She
jumped at his loud voice. She lifted startled eyes to his. “I’m sorry. What?”

He
sighed heavily. “What is wrong with you? You look terrible. You need to start
taking better care of yourself. Now, about tonight…” he began.

“Tonight?”

He
sighed again. “Yes, tonight.
The Eternity House Charity Ball?
I told you about it last week. It’s tonight. Did you get a gown?”

She
shook her head.

He
sighed again. “Did you set a hair appointment?”

Again
she shook her head.

He
threw his napkin down on his plate. “This is an extremely important event,
Trinity. I can’t emphasize that enough. Every important person in the city will
be there. I need you by my side, okay? Now finish your breakfast and I’ll have
Alex drive you into town and let’s hope you can find something acceptable at the
last minute. Don’t forget about getting your hair done. You look like hell!” he
exclaimed.

She
flinched and groaned internally about having to dress, go out, and then smile
and be entertaining when she’d never felt like it less. But she merely nodded.
It was just easier to go along with her father. She didn’t have the energy to
fight him right now.

***

Alex Masters sat beside her in the SUV
and drove in silence. The reflective lenses of his aviator sunglasses hid his
eyes. Vaguely, Trinity wondered if he resented babysitting her on a Saturday.
It couldn’t be the highlight of his day to take her shopping. With a dismissive
shrug, she turned her head to stare out the window.

For
the millionth time, she wondered what had happened to turn Rush away from her.
What had she done? She wished she could talk to him just once more for closure.
Her stomach roiled at the thought of being close enough to him speak and not
having the freedom to touch him. Maybe she’d never had that freedom. She chided
herself for letting a short-term romance shatter her this way. She should be
thankful she’d gotten what she wanted. She now knew what it felt like to be
held and loved by a man. How she wished she’d remained ignorant. This hurt too
much. She wrapped her arms around her waist to ward off the chill she felt way
down deep.

She
jumped at Alex’s voice. “Everything okay?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“No
more incidents since the attack at your office?”

“No.
Why do you ask?” she asked, wondering if something had happened with her father
that she’d been unaware of.

He
shrugged his shoulders. “You just seem… off. I just wondered if something was
going on.”

She
shook her head before turning to stare back out the window.
“No,
nothing.”

Not
really being in the mood to shop, Trinity picked up the first red dress she
came across. She picked red as it was the color her father would approve of.
She tried it on, but found her usual size too big. She frowned. She hadn’t
realized she’d lost that much weight. She was really going to have to pull
herself together. This was pathetic. She finally found a size which fit and
bought a pair of strappy high-heeled red shoes to match.

She
made her appointment at the hair salon and decided to have it swept up and
piled on top of her head. The image was smart and sophisticated. Her father
would be pleased.

Alex
gave a small smile when she emerged.
“Very nice.”

She
smiled in return. “Thanks.”

She
had to admit, she felt better. Maybe tonight was a good idea. She had been
closing herself off from everyone. Even
Sundra
had
stopped calling after being told repeatedly she didn’t feel like going out.
But no more.
She was going to make an effort to do things
whether she felt like it or not.

***

The Eternity House Charity Ball was an
annual event to raise money for Eternity House, a shelter for abused children.
No expense had been spared. The ball was being hosted in a converted movie
theater which was now used primarily for wedding receptions, and events such as
the ball. The theme for this year’s ball was
A Golden Opportunity
. The decorations were all done in varying
shades of gold. There were huge swatches of gold metallic material draped from
the ceiling and the tables were all draped with shiny, gold tablecloths.

While
her choice of dress had been hurried, she was happy with her selection. The
gown was formfitting and cut severely low in the back. Two strings of faux
diamonds draped across her back keeping the dress fitted snugly. With her
upswept hair, she looked older and exotic. Her father had smiled proudly when
she’d appeared on the staircase at home.

She
stood beside him now with a glass of champagne in her hand. They’d been at the
one-thousand-dollar-a-plate event for nearly an hour. Her resolve to throw
herself back into life was waning. She smiled at those her father introduced
her to and replied when spoken to, but all she wanted was to be home safely
ensconced in her room. She stared down at her glass as she slowly swirled the
golden liquid around. Beside her, she could hear the cadence of her father’s
voice as he spoke to those around them, but she wasn’t really paying attention
to his words. It wasn’t until she felt him stiffen and his cadence falter that
she glanced up. Entering the ballroom’s grand entrance was none other than Rush
Drayton.

He
was dressed as most others in a black tuxedo. In deference to the ball’s theme,
his bowtie was gold. On his arm was the beautiful, current
reigning
Ms. Savannah
, Hillary Reed. She was
stunning in her figure-hugging gold dress. Her long, blonde curls swirled as
she walked. Acid seemed to burn in Trinity’s stomach as she watched the couple
stroll into the room. She watched as Rush leaned towards Hillary to catch what
she was saying. Trinity gasped softly when whatever had been said caused him to
smile.

Apparently
feeling her gaze, he lifted his eyes and froze momentarily when he caught sight
of her. Her chest heaved with the need to breathe, but she couldn’t seem to get
enough oxygen. She turned to her father and placed a hand on his arm. He turned
questioning eyes to her.

“I’m
going to go sit down.”

“Of
course, darling,” he said with a smile.

She
turned and walked on unsteady limbs to their table. Why had he come? In all of
her life, she’d never run into him anywhere, and now he was everywhere. How was
she supposed to get through this night? The image of his arm draped around the
beauty queen stabbed repeatedly at her heart. She slumped down into her chair
and let the contents of her glass slide down her throat. A passing waiter took
her empty glass and replaced it with a full one.

She’d
purposefully sat with her back to the room so she wouldn’t have to watch Rush
look down into a woman’s eyes that wasn’t hers. Snapshots of the last time
she’d been with him in the swimming pool flashed in her mind… his beautiful
face twisted in want and desire.
His muscles straining to
maintain his control.
The feel and taste of his
slightly salty skin on her tongue.
She lifted her glass and took too big
a swallow and choked. Her eyes watered as she coughed. She raised her napkin to
her mouth and tried to stem her coughing. Seeing that she was drawing attention
to herself, she rose and went to find the ladies room.

She
finally calmed the tickle in her throat and repaired her makeup. Taking a deep
breath, she stepped out of the bathroom. She stood for a moment outside the
huge double-door entrance of the ballroom and considered just leaving. Alex
could run her home then come back and get her father. Knowing this event was
important to her father, and not wanting to give Rush the satisfaction of
knowing he’d ran her off, she took another deep breath and lifted her hands to
the door handles.

The
breath was forced from her lungs on a gush when she heard a familiar voice.

“Hello,
Trinity. You look beautiful tonight,” Rush Drayton said softly from behind her.

She
swallowed against the boulder lodged in her throat, licked her lips, and turned
around. “Thank you.”

He
was leaning against the lobby wall raking her over with his eyes. “How have you
been?”

“Good…
busy,” she said a little breathlessly.
What
did he want from her?
Her heart was pounding out an unhealthy beat in her
chest.

He
began to walk towards her and she took a step back in self-defense. “I’ve
missed you,” he said huskily.

The
air was once more forced from her lungs. She took another step back and felt
the wall behind her. “Don’t… just don’t,” she whispered.

He
walked slowly towards her and stopped when their bodies were almost touching.
He raised a shaky hand to lightly trace the edges of her jaw. “Why? It’s true.”

She
closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. “I need to get back,” she said.

“You’ve
lost weight,” he said as if she’d not spoken.

Her
heart twisted in her chest. “Please, don’t,” she begged him.

He
leaned into her and brushed his face against hers. He was close enough to her
that she could feel the rapid rise and fall of his chest. “I know you don’t
understand, but it really is better this way,” he murmured against her ear.

She
shivered at the contact of his lips against her ear. “Why?” she asked
breathlessly.

He
sighed heavily and took a step back as he rubbed a hand against the back of his
neck. The removal of his body from hers, made her chilly. “It’s just… better.”

She
swallowed hard and before she could stop them from coming out of her mouth, she
said, “I’ve missed you, too.”

He
flinched at the words. “I’m sorry. I… never meant to hurt you.”

Without
another word, he turned and re-entered the ballroom. She stood leaning against
the wall for several moments before she was steady enough to open the doors.
She checked to see where Rush had gone and then purposefully walked to the
opposite side. She returned to her seat facing the wall. Her father was now
sitting at the table, as well as the rest of table’s guests, and dinner was
being served.

“
Ahh
, there you are. I was getting worried,” her father
said.

“Sorry.
I was in the ladies room.”