Savior (An Impossible Novel) (17 page)

She nodded in understanding.  “Those are always the scariest ones.  But they’re also the most fun if you can get past the fear.”

I sighed miserably.  “I know.”  Clayton had ensnared me with sexual ecstasy; his erotic pull bound me to him more cruelly than any chains ever could.

Gemma gave me a little conspiratorial smile as she reached into the top of her corset.  “I think I have just what you need, honey,” she said, pinching a little plastic bag between her thumb and forefinger as she held it up for me to see.  It was filled with a white powder that I wasn’t unfamiliar with.  “You want to do a line?  I promise it’ll make you feel better.  It’s good shit.”

Oh, I knew it would make me feel better.  It would make me feel like I was on top of the world.  I didn’t do coke often, but the few times I had experienced the high had been incredible.  It had made me feel powerful, like I could do anything.  And sex had felt amazing.

I bit my lip, unsure.  If Clayton realized that I was high, he would be pissed as hell.  But on the other hand…  I remembered how incredible I had felt when he had spanked me for my reckless behavior.  Even if he did figure out that I had used, it would o
nly result in something decidedly delectable.  And I wanted release.  I wanted release from my anxiety and the release that I would achieve when Clayton punished me.

I knew
this was exactly the kind of self-destructive behavior that Clayton was trying to put an end to, but I couldn’t resist the tempting outcome.  Besides, I could get serious about being a better person once Greg went through rehab.  Having convinced myself that I had formulated a reasonable plan of action, I held out my hand to accept the drug.

“Thanks.”  This time, my smile was genuine.  I put down a paper towel over the counter and tipped out a line onto it.  One should be just e
nough to give me the buzz I wanted without getting me completely fucked up. 

Almost as soon as I inhaled the cocaine, the high hit me.  I closed my eyes in bliss as the intoxicating sensation coursed through me.  My confidence spiked; I felt like I could do anything.  Facing Clayton suddenly didn’t seem at all intimidating.  I was eager for him to touch me.  All of my qualms about taking the drug disappeared.  This was the best decision I had made in a long time.

“God, that’s good,” I practically groaned.  I looked at Gemma questioningly.  “Do you want to do a line?”

She beamed as she shook her head.  “Already did some.”  She stroked her hand down my arm intimately.  The contact felt delicious.  “Could I tempt you away f
rom your big bad Dom?  I know Garrett would love to get to know you better.”

I knew what she was asking, but as good as her touch felt, I didn’t want anyone other than Clayton.  For a change, that thought didn’t bother me at all.  I stepped away from Gemma.  “Maybe some other time,” I hedged.  “Thanks for the hit.  I owe you one.”

I thought I saw annoyance flit across her features, but a moment later I was sure I had imagined it.  She was smiling at me sweetly.  “I’ll be sure to hold you to that.”

A distant part of me registered that her words should have made me uncomfortable, but I chose to ignore it.  Clayton had been waiting for me for a
while now.  I almost hoped he was angry.

Feeling more self-assured than I had in months, I boldly stepped into Room 3.  Clayton had taken off his jacket and loosened his tie.  His roguish smile made warmth pool between my legs.

“I thought you had gotten lost,” he commented drily.

“Sorry.  I ran into a girlfriend in the bathroom and couldn’t get away.”  It wasn’t a total lie.

I approached Clayton confidently, swaying my hips seductively as I usually did when I was trying to lure in a man.  His eyes widened slightly, surprised, but I didn’t give him a chance to ask questions.  I straddled his lap where he sat on the edge of the wrought iron bed, twining my arms around the back of his neck as I hungrily took his lips with mine.

The low, rumbling sound that issued from him was disapproving, and he quickly grabbed my waist, flipping me onto my back and trapping me under his weight.  I moaned when his fingers encircled my wrists, pressing them into the mattress.  I could feel the blood pumping through my veins as my heart fluttered at a thousand beats per minute.  My skin was enflamed and
alive,
sparking with pleasure everywhere Clayton’s body touched mine.  My head was spinning from the intensity of my bliss.

As soon as he had me pinned, Clayton tore his mouth from mine.  My vision blurred and I momentarily saw two Claytons hovering above me.  I blinked hard until he coalesced back into one frowning Dom.

“You haven’t acted like this since the night we first met.  What’s wrong, Rose?”

“Nothing,” I panted,
squinting my eyes in an effort to keep him in focus.  “Everything is perfect.”  I jerked in his hold and tried to lean up into him so that I could claim his lips once again, but he pulled back further.  His frown deepened as he studied me carefully.

“Tell me what you’ve done, Rose,” he demanded.

I knew I should feel fear in the wake of that look, but I just grinned widely.  “Tequila shots.  You like them too, remember?”

His grip on my wrists tightened.  “Don’t lie to me.  I’ve seen you drunk before.  This is something different.  What did you do, Rose?”

I rolled my eyes at him.  “Chill out, Clayton.  It was just a little coke.”

He pulled away from me instantly, his expression furious and a little repulsed.  “Are you serious, Rose?!” 
He half-shouted.  “What the fuck?  You know what my job is.  My whole life is about putting an end to drug abuse.  And after seeing what your brother is going through, how could you possibly think taking cocaine isn’t a big deal?”

His tight control over his anger was slipping for the first time, and my own fury rose to meet his as his words cut at me like a whip.  He was killing my buzz.  “It’s
not
a big deal, Clayton,” I informed him hotly.  “People do it all the time.  Smith told me you needed to loosen up.  Stop being such a goddamn prude and learn to live a little.”

Clayton stood, grabbing my arm and pulling me up with him.  “We’ll discuss this later when you’re not being such a fucking idiot,” he snapped as he dragged me toward the door.

But I dug in my heels, refusing to budge.  “What do you think you’re doing?”  I demanded.

“I’m taking you home,” he informed me coldly.

“No!”  I said staunchly.  No way was I leaving with him when he was being such a mean asshole.  Adrenaline was coursing through me, and I wanted to continue riding my high.  “I came here to have some fun, and that’s what I’m going to do.”

Looking disgusted, Clayton released me.  “Is that really what I am to you?  Just someone you use for
fun? 
I thought this was something more than that.  I thought I was helping you put a stop to that kind of behavior.  But clearly I’m just enabling it.”

His words pushed threateningly against my bubble of happiness, a dozen little pins that were going to make it burst.  I folded my arms across my chest in a show of defiance, but the stance also made me feel more protected from him.  “I want you to leave now, Clayton.”

He glowered at me.  “Yes,” he snapped.  “I can see that.  In fact, I’m beginning to see a lot of things clearly.  You’ll have to find someone else to entertain you in the future.  I’ll be keeping my distance from now on.”

Clayton split into two again as he stormed from the room, and I collapsed back onto the bed as the world tilted around me.  I shoved him from my
mind and closed my eyes so I could more easily focus on the pleasurable tingles that were sparking over my skin.  Besides, the way the room was spinning was making me feel a little sick.  Blocking off my sense of sight would help to alleviate that.  But it didn’t help much; the bed felt like it was rocking beneath me.  I was getting a wicked case of the spins.

Shit.  I guess my alcohol tolerance isn’t as high as I thought.

“Hey, honey.  Are you okay?”  Gemma’s voice floated down to me.  I also registered the sound of the door closing and the lock clicking into place, but I couldn’t summon up any concern over what that meant.

“I’m not sure,” I whispered.  “I don’t think so.”

I suddenly wished Clayton hadn’t left.  He should be here to take care of me.  But I had driven him away.

My eyes snapped open when I felt a pair of rough hands grasp my arms and pull them over my head.  I could hardly make out the man who was hovering above me, but his leer was clear enough.  Something hard and cold closed around my wrists, and I heard the familiar sound of cuffs clicking into place.  I tried to tug my hands free, and alarm shot through me as I realized how much effort it took to move my arms.

“What are you doing?”  My words were slurred as my heavy tongue refused to function normally.  He lightly touched the upper swell of my breasts where they were pushed up by my corset, and I couldn’t hold back a pleasurable moan.  My flesh had never felt so sensitive, so responsive.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart,” he said.  “You’ll enjoy this.”

My moan turned to a terrified whimper as fear finally penetrated my little bubble of happiness.

Chapter 11

A second pair of hands was touching me.  They were smaller and softer, but they induced just as much terror as they slowly began to pull at my clothes, unsnapping the front of my corset and tugging my skirt and panties down my legs.  I hated how the cool air on my exposed flesh made my skin dance.

This was all wrong.  I had no control over my body; it reacted instinctively and without my consent, and my leaden limbs refused to move, to fight.

Gemma’s lips closed around my hardened nipple as the man’s fingers trailed through the traitorous moisture on my thighs.

“Please,” I forced out.  “Don’t.”

The man pressed his moistened finger to my lips, and I could taste my desire on his skin.  It made my stomach turn.  “Shhh,” he said softly.  “You’re going to help Gemma live out her fantasy.  She’s been very good lately, so she’s earned it.  She’s always wanted to watch me take an unwilling submissive.  You should be grateful; her ideas were much more violent than this.  Just relax and enjoy.  The drugs will make it feel good.”  To prove his point, he brushed his thumb over my painfully engorged clit, and I shuddered beneath him.  “And if it makes you feel any better, you won’t remember this in the morning.”

No.  God, please no.

Bile was rising at the back of my throat, and tears leaked from the corners of my eyes.

There was a loud banging on the door.  “Rose!  Rose, open this door now.”

Clayton! 
He had come back for me.  I had to let him know I was here; I couldn’t let him leave me again.  With a great effort, I opened my mouth to scream for help.  But the man’s hand was already covering it, his fingers digging into my cheek as he smothered the sound.

“Rose!”  The lock rattled as he tried to turn the doorknob.  He cursed loudly, and then there was a deafening bang as the door crashed open.

My eyes were sliding in and out of focus, but I could make out Clayton’s shocked expression from where he stood in the now-open doorway.

“You’re interrupting our scene,” my molester said angrily, keeping his ha
nd firmly over my mouth so I couldn’t protest.

No! 
Clayton couldn’t believe him. 
Don’t leave me.  Don’t leave me.

My strangled whine slipped through the man’s fingers, and Clayton’s uncertain expression darkened.

“Let her speak,” he ordered in his most dangerous voice.

The man hesitated, but after a moment he seemed to decide that it was worth the risk to d
o as Clayton said.  He knew I was unable to move, and the hopeful light in his eyes let me know he was banking on that.

At first, I couldn’t do more than force a strangled sound from my throat.  But I willed my tongue to cooperate.  I couldn’t allow Clayton to leave me here at the mercy of these terrible people.

“Red.”  The word was soft and slurred, but the flash of Clayton’s eyes let me know he understood.

“That’s her safe word,” Clayton informed my tormenter.  “Get your hands off of her now.”

The man looked desperate, and he made a last-ditch effort to save himself.  “It’s just a game,” he insisted.  “She likes it.”  He brushed his thumb over my clit again, and my moan mingled with a sob.

Clayton moved faster than my eyes could follow, and suddenly the man’s back was against the wall, Clayton’s forearm pressed against his throat.  He writhed in Clayton’s grip as he struggled to draw in air.  “Please,” he gasped out, his eyes wide with fear.

Clayton just pressed harder against his windpipe, his expression twisted into something rictus and terrifying.  “Did you show her any mercy when she begged?”  He seethed.

“What the fuck, Clayton?!”
  Smith tore his friend away from the man he was choking, and he slid to the ground, clutching at his throat as he drew in ragged breaths.

“What’s going on here?”  Derek was in the room now.

I was naked, exposed.  My skin crawled, and I wanted so badly to cover myself.  But I couldn’t move.  I let out a high, keening cry of distress.