Scattering Like Light (10 page)

“Really?” he asked, puzzled. “Why does she want to talk to you?”

“I have no idea but she sent this to the house.” I dug into my
bag for the piece of heavy-duty notepaper. “That number went to her voicemail. It’s all she sent.” I could see Callum peering over my shoulder as I looked at the paper with distaste. “It’s a weird thing to do though. The only thing I can think is that she might have spotted me climbing over the barriers and she wants to tell me off, but I’m not sure why she’s being quite so mysterious about it.”

“OK, so we need to avoid her then. What does she look like?”

“Quite old, grey hair, wearing one of those long black cassocks. I’ve seen her on the cathedral floor and at the Whispering Gallery.”

“Why don’t we go in by the crypt entrance and then sneak up the stairs? I can go ahead and check out the gallery before you have to walk around.”

“OK, sounds like a plan. You go and make sure the way is clear and I’ll be right behind you.”

It was a Sunday so the place was heaving with people. I picked my way through the crowds loitering on the steps in the sunshine, listening to all the various languages and accents, and finally made it to the side entrance to the crypt steps. It was cool and dark inside and the long, quiet corridor felt a world away from the noise and bustle just above.

Starting to walk between the café tables I kept my head down and my hair loose to conceal my face. “Is the coast clear?” I hissed as I approached the main part of the crypt.

“No sign of anyone, just keep on going.”

“OK, let’s get through here as quickly as possible.” I had my season ticket ready in my hand as I approached the gate. The guy behind the desk seemed very bored and was about to nod me through when he suddenly sat up.

“Excuse me, miss, can I take another look at your ticket, please?” His hand was stretched out towards me.

“Umm, yes, of course. Is there a problem?”

“Just had a few forgeries through lately, that’s all,” he replied, not looking at me but consulting something out of sight on his desk. “All clear. Enjoy your visit.” He passed the ticket back to me and looked towards the next person in the queue. I grabbed the ticket and hurried through the entrance, not looking back. I walked directly to the bottom of the stairs. Climbing up from here meant that I missed walking under the dome, but it was much more discreet. I didn’t look around for Callum as I knew that he would be keeping away from me. Down in the crypt the influence of the dome on the Dirges wasn’t good: it seemed to magnify the horror and suffering visible on their faces and they tried to avoid going there. So I was surprised when the tingle reappeared in my arm as I started walking up the steps. Callum’s translucent figure was visible walking next to me.

There was an urgent edge to his voice. “That ticket guy made a phone call as soon as you were out of earshot.”

“What! What did he say?” I stopped dead on the stairs.

“Keep walking,” urged Callum. “I didn’t hear all of it, but I’m pretty sure it was about you. He said something like ‘If you want to talk to her you’d better get over here now’.”

“Crap! He must’ve called the vicar. I don’t want to see her, not today.”

“We don’t have to go up the dome if you’re worried.”

I turned to look at him as I continued trudging up the endless steps. Seeing him next to me always made my heart sing, regardless of what else was going on. “No way. I want to get to the top. I’m not giving up the chance of hugging you properly,
even if it is a bit public, just because some weird vicar wants to give me a piece of her mind.” The last few words were somewhat indistinct. “Can’t talk and climb, Callum. Getting puffed. See you at the gallery.” He turned and smiled at me, a smile of such longing that for a second I forgot the pain in my calves. Then he was gone. I carried on climbing.

I hurried on up the stairs as quickly as I could manage, pausing only as I got to the landing at the Whispering Gallery level. “Callum?” I called quietly. “Is it OK to go through?” Once I started walking through the narrow little passage to the gallery it was difficult to turn back, and then once I stepped on to the gallery itself it was easy to see everyone and there was nowhere to hide.

“No sign of her,” he announced as he appeared suddenly next to me, his wrist by mine. He stayed with me as I negotiated my way around the gallery, past the Dirges who were sitting in their seats, invisible to all the other visitors. A few of them looked up at me with curiosity, but most of the others shrank away, hiding behind their hoods as Callum loomed behind me. Once safely through the little door that led to the next set of stairs I stopped for a moment, realising that I had been holding my breath.

“Was Olivia there, Callum? I didn’t see her.”

“I didn’t see her either. I’m not sure exactly where she’s got to. Maybe she’ll be up at the Stone Gallery.” He paused for a second. “Are you OK? Ready to go on up?”

I stood up straight and took a deep breath. The next spiral staircase always seemed to be the worst: round and round in tight circles with no features to tell you how close you were to the end. “Ready,” I agreed, and set off.

As I reached the next level up Callum appeared again. “I’ve checked down from the top. The vicar’s not up here, and I can’t see
her on the stairs so we’ll have a bit of time. If she’s old, she’s not going to be racing up here at any great speed.”

“OK, that’s good, so we can relax a bit.”

“Yes, panic over. But no time to waste, eh?” He smiled at me, his hand becoming more solid in mine. I gave it a quick squeeze.

“No, none. Let’s go.”

There was no need to jump over maintenance barriers, as the Golden Gallery was still open. It was a bit of a blow, but seeing Callum in public was still better than not seeing him at all, and the closer I got to the top of the dome, the more excited I was about putting my plan into action. He stayed with me as I walked up through the latticework of wooden beams and iron staircases, and each time I looked at him he became more and more solid.

“Come on, give me a break,” I puffed as we reached a little landing and he strode on to the next stairs. “I normally have a bit of a rest here. Why are you walking with me today?” Normally he met me at the top, which gave me a few minutes to compose myself after the lengthy climb. He was not seeing me at my best, red-faced and gasping.

“Now the others know you are here, I’m not letting you in here alone, not after what happened before.”

“Oh, good point. Do you think that someone else might try to hurt me?”

“I’m pretty sure none of them would dare, not with Matthew keeping watch.”

“Was he? I didn’t see him.”

“He’s had to lay down the law, making sure that they all behave themselves around you. It’s easier now Lucas has gone though; he was always the worst.”

“Was that why everyone was so wary of me back down in
the Whispering Gallery?”

“Probably. They’ve been given some very clear instructions about leaving you alone.” His voice was tight, and I knew that he was remembering the fight on this same staircase not long ago, when Lucas nearly managed to get me to take off the amulet. I shuddered briefly.

“There’s no need to worry, Callum. I’m not going to take it off ever again. None of them can hurt me, not now I know what they could do.”

He made a non-committal grunting noise. “Look really, I’ll be fine,” I continued, still wanting to catch my breath. “I can’t talk any more now. I’ll call you again at the top.” I smiled briefly at a passing tourist, who was obviously curious about who I was talking to. I made a bit of a show of getting out my mobile and pressing the cancel button, but left the earphones in place. Callum disappeared up the steps and I concentrated on getting up to the next landing.

It was hot and stuffy in the dome, and stepping through the open door on to the Golden Gallery was a huge relief. Callum was instantly by my side, and it took all my self-control not to hurl myself into his arms. As no one else could see him, that would have looked too odd. I pretended to make a call. “Hi, Callum, I made it – top of the dome!”

“So I can see,” he said drily. “If you come round to the east side there’s not so many people there and we can sit together for a while if you want.”

“It’s what I’ve been waiting for.” I smiled back. The gallery wasn’t as busy as it had been on previous visits, with no snaking queue of people shuffling around. Small groups were gathered at the railings, pointing out some of the various landmarks that were
so clearly visible from this vantage point. There were no actual seats, but the carving on the stone wall made small ledges where it was possible to rest. I could finally feel Callum’s strong fingers laced through mine and I squeezed them tightly.

I sat down on the small stone ledge next to Callum, leaning against him, his arms holding me close. I could feel his heart beating through the thin white shirt he always wore. I adjusted my earpiece with a deliberately exaggerated movement, although no one seemed to be paying me any attention.

“Oh, Callum, I’ve missed you so much!”

“I know, and I’m really sorry about everything,” he said in a voice heavy with emotion. I could feel him kiss my hair, properly this time, not just the faintest hint. It took all my self-control not to swivel around and kiss him properly. “It’s just that I’ve missed you so badly; I guess I got jealous.”

“Really, there’s no need to apologise. We’re here now, and that’s what matters, nothing else.” His hand was stroking the length of my hair and back in a tantalising fashion. “What’s really annoying is that your maintenance man is away. I’m not sure how much of this I’m going to be able to stand.”

“Do you know,” he murmured, kissing down my neck from my ear to my shoulder, “you are utterly in my power for once. I think I like this!” He continued stroking my arm as I tried hard not to wriggle.

“You’re impossible!” I laughed, relieved at how easily his black mood had been lifted by just being up here.

We sat for a while, then I got up to stand by the railings, Callum right behind me. It wasn’t the same as hugging him properly, but he could hold me tightly, and I could hold his arms, kissing his hand when no one was close by. The Thames glittered in
the sunshine below us. I stared unseeing out across the panorama of London, thinking about my plan. I knew I could save him, and I could do it any time. Within minutes he could be a mass of sparks and we could be together properly by this evening. So what were we waiting for?

“You’re very quiet,” observed Callum. “What’s bothering you?”

“You could be here tonight, Callum, by my side. You only have to say the word.”

He sighed heavily. “I know. I’ve thought about little else since yesterday.” I saw his long fingers trace the shape of the twisted silver on my wrist. “And I’ve come to a decision. You seem really convinced that it will work, and if it does, I’m with you properly. If it doesn’t, I die. But I can’t live like this. I love you too much to be so far away from you all the time. Given those choices, I want to try.”

I turned to look at him, ignoring the strange looks from a passing tourist. His eyes were dark with emotion, the gold flecks flashing as he moved. “Are you sure? If we do it now there’s no going back.” I tailed off as it became obvious I was being overheard. I picked up my phone and gave an angry look towards the middle-aged couple who were lurking just a little bit too close to us.

“I’m sure. You’ll be able to do the same for Olivia and the others afterwards, won’t you?”

“I don’t see why not. It doesn’t seem to wear me out at all.”

“Then it’s time to take the risk,” he said firmly. “I’m no use to you like this, am I?”

“It’s a much harder question to answer up here, where I can see you properly.” I lifted his hand and pressed it to my cheek, feeling its warmth and strength. “Back home, where you’re
insubstantial – well, that’s easy. Here, you’re already as real as me.”

He held me tighter for a moment. “I think we should do it,” he whispered, running his hand down the length of my arm. “And I think we should do it now.”

It was time. I had expected to feel some panic, some worry about whether I was wrong, but I was strangely calm. I felt so sure that I wasn’t going to kill him, and that we had the rest of our lives to be together. I looked round; he was watching me closely, a small frown wrinkling his forehead. I was almost bubbling with the thought of it all, of being able to sit quietly reading, resting my head on his chest, of eating meals together, of finally getting the opportunity to walk along a beach, hand in hand. I knew what I had to do.

“It’s a big decision,” I whispered back, and for a second I thought I saw a shadow cross his eyes. “A big decision, but one that I’m happy to make with you.” The frown disappeared as his face creased into a huge smile.

“Great! So where shall we do this? Here or somewhere else?”

The butterflies were already setting off in my stomach, but I didn’t let myself think about the consequences of it going wrong. Lucas had disappeared, and there was no reason to suppose that he wasn’t safe and well somewhere, just like Catherine. It was time to do to Callum what I had done to Lucas.

“No time like the present.” I smiled at him. The gallery was fairly quiet for a moment. It was as good a time as any. “OK,” I said, my mouth suddenly dry. “Here’s the plan. You put your amulet with mine, and I start to push with my mind. As soon as you disappear I’ll run down to the riverbank. The tide is out so it’ll be easy to fish you out and I’ll take you home. Sorted!”

I could see the fear momentarily on his face. “I love you, Alex. Whatever happens, I want you to remember that.” He leaned forwards and kissed me gently on the lips, and I knew that he thought he could be kissing me goodbye.

“I love you too,” I replied, looking deep into those mesmerising eyes, trying to sound as confident as possible. “See you on the other side!”

He held out his wrist and I positioned mine next to it. “Ready?”

“Ready.”

Callum’s amulet was pressed up hard against mine and I held his wrist tightly as I felt the power in me grow. It was a wave, rising as it travelled up my arm from the twisted silver. The stone started to glow. I turned all my attention to the amulet, ignoring everything else going on around me.