Searching for Neverland (46 page)

Josh nodded, as he put his cell phone in his pocket. “Yeah, apparently Savannah asked Caleb when their mom was coming back.”

Oh shit.
We’d made the collective decision not to tell Savannah about her mom just yet. Neither of us wanted to tell her and then leave for the night, so we were holding off until the next day. I really hoped Caleb hadn’t told her. I was sure my mom would be able to comfort her, but it wasn’t the same as having Josh and me there.

“Did he say anything?”

He shook his head. “No, he told her he didn’t know, and then tried to distract her, but then she asked your mom if she knew, and she started to get upset and say she wanted her mommy.”

“Oh, no. Should we go back?”

I didn’t want Savannah to be upset.

He shook his head. “It’s fine, your parents handled it. She and your dad are watching
Tangled
on DVD, but we need to tell her first thing tomorrow.”

I nodded. “I know,” I said, as I my eyes started to fill with tears. I’d had to fight back crying all day, and it was catching up with me.

Then Josh took my hand, and
I looked
over
at him. “No tears,” he said, as he leaned forward and kissed me. “We need to get into party mode, okay?”

I nodded. “Yeah, okay.”

He took my hand again as we walked around the side of the house, through the backyard and along the path that led to the back entrance to O’Donnell’s. The raised area we’d added for the bands we hoped to book on Friday and Saturday nights looked amazing. Sean’s team had done a phenomenal job, and we’d strung lanterns around the perimeter to finish off the look. It was fun and festive but still looked relatively classy.
And we’d lined the perimeter of the patio in front of the stage with tables, but in the center there was standing room only.

The stairs leading to the apartment upstairs came down along the side of the stage, right near the few steps that led to the elevated platform, and we’d turned the apartment into a large open space with couches where bands could hang out or we could book private parties. It was a fairly versatile space, and that was the intention.
Cole’s idea had been a good one.

“Alright,” Josh said, clapping his hands together. “We have three hours to make this place party ready. You up for the challenge?”

“Do I have a choice?”

He grinned at me. “Not really.”

* * *

“Do you guys need anything else?” I asked the bands that were hanging out upstairs with their respective entourages.

There were four of them in total, including one all girl band that I’d booked for us, after having seen them perform a few months earlier. And granted, aside from Liar’s Edge, they were all local bands, but they each had brought a few people with them
, so the room was packed
. Good thing Josh and I had decided to have Vanessa bartend up there since it was a party in and of itself and drinks were already being consumed, and we hadn’t even opened the doors of the bar yet.

“Maybe this should be the VIP room,” I joked to Josh as we surveyed the craziness of the band members tuning their instruments, playing little riffs, drinking, laughing and talking to each other.

“Hey guys,” Molly said as sh
e sauntered up to us with
Emily in tow.

She reached out and hugged Josh, which reminded me that they’d had
sex, but then I realized that it
didn’t matter. He loved me. His past was his past, and it needed to stay there.

“Hi Taylor,” Emily said sweetly, as she reached up to hug me. She was really little. “It’s good to see you again.”

Emily looked rocker-chick cool wearing a short leather skirt, a black fitted t-shirt and red Doc Marten’s. Her light shoulder length blond hair was messy in an intentional way,
she’d changed out the diamond stud in her nose for a silver hoop,
and she was rockin’ some serious eyeliner. I was a little envious of her look and wondered if Josh would like me in something like that. He’d gone through a punk phase, so maybe
. A
lthough I was usually more girlie than anything else, especially that night in a bright pink dress and silver heels that I knew I’d swap for flats before the night was over.

But then again, maybe the punk vibe wasn’t so parental, and I needed to think about that now that I was potentially going to be taking on two kids.
Yikes.
Scary thought, even though I knew it was the right thing to do.

Then, as I eyed Emily and noticed Zack across the room dressed in combat boots, black jeans and an ‘All Time Low’ t-shirt, I remembered they were parents, and maybe that didn’t mean you had to lose your identity.

“Thank you guys so much for doing this,” I told Molly and Emily.

“Yeah, absolutely,” Molly said.

“How’s the tour going?”
I asked Emily.

“Amazing!”
she
said, grinning widely. “The guys are getting really well-known. It’s so crazy!”

She was so bubbly. Her personality didn’t fit her look at all, but I think I liked that about her.

“Uh, tell me about it,” Josh chimed in. “There’s a line around the side of the building.”

“Awesome,” Emily said, clapping her hands. “We’ll go out there in a minute and start handing out stickers and getting them excited.”

“I think they’re already excited,” Zack said then, coming up behind Emily and wrapping his arms around her waist.
I noticed he’d been watching the crowd outside through one of the front windows.

“They love you, baby,” she said, looking up at him. “Do you and the guys want to go outside and sign autographs before they let everyone in?”

Zack grinned at us. “I still can’t believe people want my autograph.”

“Hell, I want it,” Josh chimed in, and we all laughed.

But he’d been listening to Liar’s Edge ever since
we’d gone to
the
ir
concert, and I had to admit, they were slowly creeping to the top of my favorite bands list.

“Well, I’ll leave some signed merch for you before we go,” Zack told him.

“Taryn!” Emily squealed then, and I turned around to see my sister walking toward us. She and Emily embraced, and then Emily held her at arm’s length and shook her head. “I can’t even tell. You look great!”

Taryn sighed. “I look chunky, but on the bright side, I stopped puking all the time, so that’s pretty awesome.”

“What’s going on?” Molly murmured to me.

“My sister’s pregnant,” I told her, and she made a face similar to one I would have made fairly recently. Maybe Molly and I would end up being friends.

Emily shook her head. “I’m so happy for you,” she said brightly. “You have to call me when you find out what you’re having, okay?”

“I will.”

“Yea! Now do you want to help Molly and me pass out merchandise to the crowd outside?”

My sister’s eyes brightened. She was a PR major in college, and I knew she was envious of Emily’s job promoting an up-and-coming rock band.

“Hell yeah,” she answered automatically.

Emily ran over to grab a few stacks of stickers that said ‘Liar’s Edge’ and grabbed my sister’s hand before heading out the door. She stopped at the big picture window and looked down at the
stage and the
outdoor area below. The she turned around and grinned at Zack.

“Baby, it’s just like when you used to play at Phil’s,” she said excitedly, and I wasn’t sure what she meant by that. “Do you think you should wear your cowboy hat tonight?”

“You know I only wear that for you when we’re alone, princess,” he fired back, and she blushed crimson before she winked at him.

“You guys need anything?” Josh asked, remembering his role in making sure his headlining band was happy. He was so good at this. I needed to take notes.
I was too busy being a fan-girl.

“Nah, we’re good. We’ll go down in a few minutes and say hi to the people waiting, but I think we’re fine,” Zack confirmed.

“Cool, well if you need anything, Vanessa can take care of it,” Josh said, indicating the brunette behind the small bar who was being hit on by the drummer from Liar’s Edge as she mixed him a drink.

“Awesome. Thanks man,” Zack said, giving Josh one of those handshake/hug things guys do. “I appreciate it. We’ll put on a good show for you tonight.”

Josh nodded. “I’m sure you will. You guys rocked it when we saw you a few weeks ago. You’re welcome to play our little bar any time.”

Zack cocked his head to the side. “Well, I have a special place in my heart for little bars since I got my start in two of them.
In fact, you should talk to my cousin Leo, our bassist, he’s owned a bar in Durham for the past few years. He can probably give you some good insight.
”

“Thanks, man. I really appreciate that,” Josh said admiringly, as Zack nodded once and
sauntered
over to the other guitarist in his band
who was trying to coax the drummer away from Vanessa so she could do her job
.

* * *

By the time Liar’s Edge took the stage, the crowd was heavily intoxicated and having an amazing time. We’d had to turn people away or make them wait until others left since we hit capacity an hour after opening the doors. Never in a million years could we have predicted things
would go this well, and I think Josh and I were slowly realizing that we were going to need to hire some more help if business continued to boom like it was.

As Liar’s Edge was winding down their set and playing their latest hit single,
Jump,
Josh threaded his arms around my waist and pulled me back against his chest. I’d been dancing in front of him with Allison and Casey since he wouldn’t dance with me, but now that it was a slower song, I’d taken to swaying in time with the music and singing along to the lyrics, and he’d capitalized on the moment.

“I want them,” he said, his lips at my ear.

I turned around to look at him, giving him a questioning look. I had no clue what he was talking about. “Want what?”

“Caleb and Savannah. I want them,” he said, as he cast his eyes down, almost as if he was afraid of my reaction.

“I do
,
too,” I said quietly.

He looked up at me. “Really?”

I nodded. “I know it’ll be crazy and hard and a huge commitment, but
I
don’t think I could live with another solution. They don’t have anyone else.”

Josh gazed at me in awe for a few seconds.
“God, I love you,” he said
, his blue eyes burning with intensity, as he wrapped his arms tighter around me.

“Josh, is it even possible? I mean, we’re not married, we’ve only been together a short while, and neither of us is related to them. Would a judge actually give us custody?”

“They’d give it to me. I mean, it’s in Carlie’s will, so yeah, it’s possible. Actually, it’s pretty definite, unless a family member wants to fight me for them, but I don’t think Jer’s mom will want to take on two kids, and Melissa can’t. I already know that, so I think they’re mine.”

I looked up at him in shock. I was pretty sure he was telling me something he’d kept secret up until now, but I wasn’t sure. “What do you mean it’s in her will?”

He hugged me tighter, as if he was afraid I might run away at this news. “Jeremy and Carlie actually put me in their will as the person who’d get custody of the kids if they both died, but I honestly
never
thought that would happen – even after Jer’s accident. But judges don’t usually argue with that kind of thing if it’s in a will. I think it would be drastically different if I was trying to fight his family, but they won’t contest it.”

Wow, this was really happening.

“Will the judge care that we’re not married?”

Josh smirked at me. “Why, do you want to run
off
to Vegas and make it official?”

I smacked his shoulder. “Be serious, Josh.”

“Oh, would you prefer for me to tell you that if I see you in five years I’m putting a ring on your finger?”

I smacked him again for throwing Alex’s words back in my face, and he laughed. It felt good to laugh with him, even if it felt completely wrong and unnatural in the grand scheme of things.

“I’m being serious,” he continued. “You know we’re going to end up married. I can’t imagine being with anyone else, can you?”

I shook my head and smiled at him. “No, I can’t.”

“Well, good, because that would have been a really crushing blow to realize you were just in this for the sex.”

I laughed. “Oh, that’s definitely a bonus, but I’m really in love with the man behind the sex.”

He leaned down and
kissed me, just as the band wrapped up their song and the crowd went nuts.

“Hey guys, thanks so much for coming out to see us play tonight at O’Donnell’s, the coolest new pub in Tampa!” Zack yelled into the microphone. “You guys rock!”