Seasons of Tomorrow (46 page)

Jacob’s skin pricked, and he didn’t know what he’d rather do—listen and comfort Esther or find this Peter and hurt him. The worst thing Peter could have done was boldly paint word pictures about someone as private as Esther.

“Bailey came to see me the next day. When he told me all he’d heard, I was sure he was mistaken. He’d only talked to Peter a few times. Surely Bailey hadn’t heard the voice of the man I loved. Besides, Peter and I were only parking the rig out of sight and kissing … thus far. I could’ve confronted Peter, but my gut said if I wanted the truth, I had to find out on my own. So I asked Bailey not to say anything to anyone, and I stayed in the back room of his shop the next weekend, the room where he had been able to hear them so clearly.”

Relief eased the tension in his gut. At least she hadn’t slept with him, but the scenario certainly helped explain her desire to house pregnant girls.

“Jacob, I hoped against hope that Bailey was wrong, but he wasn’t. By myself in the darkness of that shop, I listened as Peter bragged about how many girls he’d been with—Amish and Englisch. But he was with them only once. He’d win their hearts, take their virginity, and move on, and he told his friends he’d have me in less than two months. Then he talked about looking forward to the next girl on his list, which he had already picked out. I was so humiliated and brokenhearted that I couldn’t even confront him. I just sat there weeping until morning.”

In all of Jacob’s travels, he’d not met anyone as cold and calculating as this Peter sounded. “So now you don’t trust men.”

She shrugged. “People are people. Some are tender-hearted, and some are merciless. Before my Daed got sick, he could be ridiculously difficult, but I saw it. I knew when he was the problem, whether I was free to voice it or not. But how could I possibly have fallen in love with Peter and not seen through him?”

“Maybe for a season love is blind, only seeing what it wants to. I thought Rhoda loved me when she loved Samuel.”

“No, Jacob. It’s not the same at all. She did love you. It just fell short of being the marrying kind. Both she and Samuel love you. I could tell that based on what you told me even though I was in Virginia. But I couldn’t see who Peter was when he stood right in front of me, and yet he wanted to cut out my heart and watch me writhe. I’ll never get past the fact that I fell in love with a horrible man.”

She took a deep breath. “A few weeks later an Amish girl about my age from a district in Maryland came looking for me. She’d heard I was seeing Peter, and she came to ask me to stop. In complete brokenness and tears, she confessed she was pregnant. We went to see Peter, but despite our best efforts, he denied being the father and called her horrible names. Her parents packed her bags when they discovered she was pregnant, and …”

“You housed your first pregnant girl.”

She nodded. “Peter left Virginia for a while, which was a relief, but he eventually returned with a wife. And I attend church with him. I’ll catch him looking at me at times. His smirk makes me so angry. He thinks my great heartache over him is why I’m still single. I feel sorry for his wife. No one that out of balance with reality could be any fun to live with. We only get one life, and Amish only get one marriage. But the idea of being stuck in the wrong marriage had me convinced I’d rather be single … until you came along. The last time we were together, you asked how many men I’ve been friends with who wanted a romantic relationship. There haven’t been any, Jacob. Since Peter, I’ve never met anyone I wanted to get close to. Until you.”

Hope pounded inside him. “That’s all I need to know.”

“I’m not quite finished with my confessions …” Esther pulled something out of her pocket, keeping it hidden between her hand and the folds in her dress. She took Jacob’s wrist and turned his hand palm up, then put a black, hardcover phone into it.

“What’s this?”

She stared at the phone, looking hesitant to answer. “It’s where your text messages have been going.”

Jacob’s throat closed, and it became hard to breathe. What all had he written?

Esther tapped the phone with her index finger. “Bailey changed the landline in his shop to a cell phone a day or two before our argument at his house. He brought it to me the first time he received a message, and much to his dismay, and as a testimony of his love, he let me confiscate it. Apparently you didn’t realize that a cell phone says
delivery failed
if a text doesn’t go through.”

“I didn’t.” His skin prickled. “You could’ve texted me back and let me know the messages were coming through.”

“Maybe I should have.”

“Maybe?” He didn’t like the edge to his tone, but good grief!

“I needed to know what was on your mind and heart.”

His anger relented as quickly as it had assaulted him. “Okay, but just so you know, I’m aware that I came on pretty strong, sharing ridiculous dreams, like a man imagining winning the lottery when he hasn’t even bought a ticket.”

“I needed every word you shared.” She folded her arms and stepped closer. “And you needed to hear all I just said. But …”

His heart lurched into his throat. Was she going to bare her soul simply to say they needed to be
only
friends? “Go on.”

Her eyes met his. “The full truth of it is … since the day you came to the shop to help me,”—tears welled and one ran down her beautiful face—“I’ve been awed by you. I kept convincing myself you couldn’t be as amazing as you seemed. The idea of falling for anyone is terrifying, but for someone
younger than me? I felt like a fool. But it was the texts that dissolved the last of my reservations.”

“Then it was worth every sentence I wrote.”

She searched his eyes. “Like my Daed or Peter, men can hide how difficult or manipulative they are until they’re married, and then women are powerless in a society that believes God’s will puts people together and the man has complete authority in a home.”

Jacob brushed a tear from her cheek, and his heart leaped when she didn’t pull away. “There are far more good men than bad.”

“That’s like saying the odds of being struck by lightning are almost nil when I’m standing there having been hit twice already.”

“Most of us know our days are numbered, and we only long to love and be loved by those who know us best—by our wives and children.” But he knew it would take a lot of years before she could accept what he was saying was true. It was enough for now that she believed it of him. He moved his hands to each side of her neck, stroking her cheeks with his thumbs. “So where does all this leave us?”

She lowered her eyes, and he gently tilted her head back ever so slightly. She drew a ragged breath. “I’ve been saving my love a long time, Jacob. I just didn’t know it until you entered my life.”

His heart pounded with relief as unfettered love began to sprout. “Is it too bold to say I’d like to be with you and no one else for the rest of my life?”

She shook her head, seemingly unable to speak.

“No?” He lifted her chin.

“It’s not too bold to say it.”

The love and respect he saw in her eyes worked its way into his soul.

She tugged on his shirt. “I agree with almost every text you wrote about doing construction work and traveling to various states for a few months each year.”

“Really? That’s encouraging. What didn’t you agree with?”

“That I could stay rooted while you travel for work. I want to go with you as much as possible.”

His heart jumped. Could he be that blessed? “Really?”

“It’d be fun, and our excuse for my going with you is I need to do the cooking and cleaning. When you’re off, we’ll sightsee and explore. Attend auctions, yard sales, and gut a few old houses here and there. And we could begin the first year we’re married.”

The first year we’re married …
That she spoke those words without hesitation made his heart sing. “And your home for unwed mothers?”

“I’ve been working on that. They’ll be well taken care of, sometimes by me, sometimes by the bishop’s wife and other volunteers.”

Wow!
Clearly his texts had her thinking and planning. He liked that, and it said a lot about how well they could communicate when he was away. “I imagine I’ll need to return here during springtime each year.” Would she mind?

“I could come with you. I haven’t spent time anywhere yet that wasn’t completely fascinating in its own way.”

He laughed. “A woman after my own heart.”

She smiled and tilted her head in a way that welcomed a kiss. “And you are a man after mine, and that includes the kind of man who intends to always be in Sandra’s and Casey’s lives.”

He could hardly take it all in. Esther understood who he was and wanted to help him embrace a good life as much as he wanted to do the same for her. He wrapped his arms around her and lowered his lips to hers, grateful to have found the one. As she melted against him, he knew …

What they had now was worth every bit of the long, painful journey they’d traveled to find each other.

EPILOGUE

Nerves skittered through Leah, making her feel flushed as she folded a pair of jeans and tucked them into her suitcase. Music played softly on the digital clock radio beside her bed. A ceiling fan whirred overhead, rustling the knee-length, beige silky dress that hung on the closet door.

Her wedding dress. She’d bought it six weeks ago, and it’d been hanging right there ever since, waiting for today.

The store below her was silent, closed all day for this wonderful occasion. With help from family—some of hers and all of Landon’s—she had a thriving business.

Finally, two years after she and Landon had made up at the hospital, they would marry. They’d spent the last two years trying to walk carefully among the Amish as she severed ties as honorably as she knew how.

Her phone rang, and she dug it out of her jeans pocket, glancing at the screen.
Landon
. She put in her earbud headphones, brushed her finger across the screen, and slid the phone back into her pocket. “Apparently this avoid-the-groom-before-the-wedding thing doesn’t include phone calls.”

Landon chuckled. “The tradition is that the couple isn’t to
see
each other before the wedding.”

“Oh.” She put the last few items into her suitcase and zipped it. “If you marry me enough times, I’m bound to get it all straight in my head.”

He laughed. “It’s taken us years to get it done once, but your confusion over traditional English weddings is understandable. It would’ve helped if you’d been able to attend one before our big day. How’re you doing?”

His question hung in the air, and she pondered it.

Even though she was going to be center stage during a rather unfamiliar ceremony, she was beyond excited to begin a new chapter of her life. But it hurt that no one on her side of the family would be allowed to attend her wedding.

“Great … and yet a little sad.”

“I know. Me too.”

She ran her fingers over her dress, enjoying the cool, soft fabric. Landon’s mom and grandmother had shopped with her. The trio had spent two days going from store to store before Leah found the perfect dress—not too fancy or too plain. Landon’s mom said it was a vintage sundress style with a short waist jacket. Whatever its style, Leah thought it was perfect for a midsummer, Saturday afternoon wedding in a small church. “It’s finally our day, Landon.”

“It is. I’d begun to think it’d never arrive.”

She chuckled. When she was eighteen and they were falling in love, he’d had to encourage her regularly to slow down her desire to get married. This past year
he
had been the one who needed encouragement to continue waiting. But she’d had goals she wanted to accomplish before she wed—like establishing the store, finally getting her driver’s license, earning her GED, and being accepted into a community college, where she’d taken a few business classes at night.

More than those things, at twenty-one years old, she had a deep, abiding satisfaction, and even on her worst days, peace guided her.

“Leah, I called to say that I’m leaving in a few minutes. It’s your last chance to take me up on the offer to drive you to the church.”

“I’m not arriving with the groom. Go.”

“Mom and Granny are at the church already, making sure the girly stuff is in the right places, but they wouldn’t mind coming back to get you.”

“Flowers, tulle, and lighting.” She looked forward to seeing the church decorated for her wedding.

“Yeah, like I said—the girly stuff.”

As a gift to her and Landon, his mom had been the wedding planner. With Leah staying busy at the store and knowing too little about Englisch weddings, she was glad to turn it over to her. They’d become good friends since meeting almost two years ago. For that, Leah was grateful. Other than giving opinions about the wedding plans, Leah hadn’t needed to do any work to prepare for the event. She had even slept late this morning. There wouldn’t be a meal after the wedding, just a nice reception that Landon’s
parents had insisted on paying for. The ladies from Unity Hill were doing the setup, serving, and cleanup.

Her life was so different now, and this was just the beginning. Eighteen months ago, when she’d told her Daed she was moving off the farm and wasn’t going to join the faith, he’d railed at her and hung up, and he had refused to speak to her since. He didn’t let her younger sisters talk to her either, but her Mamm had written a couple of times—just enough to assure Leah she loved her even though she disagreed with her decisions. Leah didn’t know if her Mamm had Daed’s permission to write or if she had to sneak around to write and send the letter.