Second Chances (18 page)

A storm threatened long into the night. The air was electric, crackling with the fury fighting to break free. When it finally did, Karina awoke; tense and rigid with stress. The room was full of shadows. The darkness of the room mirrored the darkness of her thoughts. There was no way she could surrender to the comfort of sleep. Nightmares would dominate tonight. She huddled deeper under the covers.

God, this was so stupid. If she were in her own home, she'd just get up and make a cup of herbal tea. Maybe put on the television or listen to soothing music for a while. And while those things sounded perfectly reasonable, what she really wanted to do was crawl into Brian's bed. But after tonight's scene, that would be seriously stupid.

Wouldn't it?

Why was she resisting? None of her reasons seemed logical at this point. Was she ready for the next step?

Definitely.

Satisfied that she'd finally made the right decision, she slipped out of bed and into the hallway. The skylights offered a glimpse into the fury raging outside. Walking carefully in the dark, she headed in the direction of his room.

She frowned. Brian's bedroom door was open. She peered inside to stare disappointedly at the empty, rumpled bed. That figured. She finally bolstered the courage to take this step and he wasn't even here. Sighing softly, she turned to head back to her own room and noticed a pale glow of light coming from downstairs. Curious, she made her way to the main level.

A small fire crackled in the fireplace, throwing out the soft flickering light she'd seen from upstairs. Brian reclined on the leather couch, his feet propped up on a nearby ottoman. There was a brandy snifter, with just a hint of amber left inside, on the coffee table beside him. He was fast asleep.

She smiled tenderly down at him. She carefully covered him up with one of the mohair throws he kept over the couches, and dropped a gentle kiss on his forehead. There were still a few pieces of wood sitting off to one side. Quietly, she added another one to the fire. The flames danced to their own tune, unaffected by the pounding of the storm outside. As she should be. Brian was here, she wasn't alone. She really had no reason to let fear dominate.

She tossed back the remaining cognac from his glass and with one last loving look, she returned to her own bed.

Alone.

***

Brian shuffled down the hallway, having woken with a sore back and a pounding head. He'd been covered with a blanket.
Karina.
He'd stayed downstairs for an extra finger of scotch tonight and had fallen asleep. Having Karina so close, yet not nearly close enough was a slow, twisting torture. He wanted nothing more than to open her bedroom door and crawl in beside her. His footsteps slowed as he approached her door. She'd gone up long ago. She had to be sleep.

Then he heard her cry out. The sound soft, muffled. But her pain and fear tiptoed into his heart, regardless.

He reached out and turned the knob, slowly pushing the door open. From the doorway, he could see her twist in her sleep, the covers rippling with her unrest.

Hesitantly, he walked forward, not wanting to shock her awake but wishing he could help. She cried out again, huddling deeper under the blankets. "Karina," he whispered softly, reaching down to stroke her shoulder and back. Doing what he could to soothe and calm her as she slept.

It took several minutes for her to relax. But eventually the tightness in her face eased and her body relaxed as she slipped into a deeper sleep.

He couldn't help but notice the sheer, silky negligee she wore, one with loose shoulder straps that kept slipping off. Twice he tugged them back into position successfully but on the third time, he had to fight to keep his hand from wandering. From exploring the large expanse of smooth bare skin. A hint of perfume teased his senses, and he shuddered with the effort to control himself. Beads of sweat broke out on his forehead. He almost hadn't made it.

She was so precious to him. So caring and so honest in her emotions. He needed her in his life.

He was desperate to take their relationship to the next level, but he didn't want to pressure her. He wanted it to be a natural progression. He didn't want her to come to him out of fear, or because she felt it was expected.

When the strap slid down, yet again, he knew he was in trouble.

What he really wanted was for her to be as hot with need as he was.

And she was close. But not close enough.

***

Karina awoke to police in the kitchen early the next morning.

It had been another night of almost no sleep. Instead of sexual fantasies keeping her awake, it was never ending nightmares of Ian. The hot shower hadn't relieved the groggy heaviness, but maybe coffee would.

She mustered a smile for Officer Markham while reaching for the cup that Brian was offering her. It was hard to work up any enthusiasm about finding a policeman drinking coffee in your kitchen.

"Are you okay, honey? Didn't you sleep well?"

She just shrugged in response. "It was fine." She smiled at the officer. "Is there anything new or are we still in the dark as much as ever?" she asked, trying to keep the bitterness from her voice. She didn't bother looking up. It was easier to stare into the depths of her black cup.

"No, there's nothing new. Except this mug—if it's his. It adds to the harassment, stalking even, but we can't prove it, and so far, he hasn't done anything dangerous."

She frowned. "So you might get him on a smaller charge, but he'd be out in no time and possibly even angrier."

"If he even goes in. If he's out on bail or gets home arrest… That he's potentially continuing on this path with menacing phone calls and this—" the officer indicated the mug "—shows he's not letting the issue go. As his behavior escalates, obviously, our concern goes up proportionally."

Karina had to be satisfied with that.

"I'm afraid that's it for now." Markham shrugged his massive shoulders at them. "Thanks for the coffee. And just be sensible."

He shook hands with them both and walked out.

Karina stepped out onto the front porch to watch the police car drive off. One question burned in her mind. What would bring the police back the next time?

A
fter Markham left, Karina hugged her coffee cup and pondered the mess of her relationship. She'd made her decision the night before, but how could she bring up this topic of conversation with him?

The answer came sooner than she thought.

Brian walked into the kitchen. Sheepishly, he said, "I presume you came downstairs last night. Thanks for the blanket."

She smiled gently at him. "You looked comfortable, so I left you."

"I woke up around four and made it back to my own bed." He massaged the back of his neck. "My neck is still stiff, though." He walked over to the coffee pot and refilled his cup.

"Couldn't you sleep last night?" Karina asked casually, her eyes on him.

He raked his fingers through his still-damp hair and stood silently for a moment. Then, as if making some monumental decision he turned and said, "Not a chance. I kept trying to remember all the reasons why I said I'd wait for you to come to me. But somewhere along those lines, I fell asleep dreaming of you." He watched her intently.

Stunned by his admission, Karina didn't know what to say.

"Don't tell me you're surprised," he asked.

"No," she said quietly. "That's what took me downstairs to look for you."

In two strides, he was next to her, staring down at her in disbelief. "You came to me last night and I was asleep?" His voice rose in astonishment. Disbelief and chagrin shone in his magnetic eyes.

"I was scared."

"Oh." Any remnants of hope in his expression faded quickly from his face. "Then I realized that," she took a deep breath, "I was only fooling myself, while cheating us both." There, she'd admitted it.

"Cheating us both? In what way?" He asked carefully. Slowly, he picked up her clenched fist to hold between his own.

"I finally admitted that I really do want to be with you." Her voice dropped to barely above a whisper.

"Because you were scared?" he asked. "Because you wanted comfort and this was the way to get it?"

"Because I wanted to be in your arms." Her voice rose slightly. "Do you really think that I would have sex with you just so you would keep me safe?"

"No." He shook his adamantly. "But neither do I want you going to bed with me because you mistake wanting comfort for wanting me." There was bleakness in his voice.

She'd never heard that tone before. Her heart squeezed as she realized he was as unsure about her as she was about him. She took a deep breath and blurted out, "It's you I want."

His eyes warmed several degrees and even twinkled a little. "Are you ready to give me another chance?"

Warmth and a sense of surety, rightness built inside her. A smile broke across her face. "Absolutely."

"Then maybe the conclusion I came to last night won't be out of line." He lifted her hand, turning it over to drop a kiss on her palm, awakening nerve endings deep inside. Quietly, he said," I thought that maybe we should get out of town for the weekend. Go to my cabin on Saltspring Island and spend some time alone." His velvet voice sliding over her, he asked, "Would you come away with me this weekend?"

A second kiss brushed across her knuckles, the third and the fourth he placed gently on the inside of her wrist.

Shivers raced over her, warming her heart deep inside. There was a hidden question in his words. She knew that. This was no time to hide with her answer.

Her barely audible voice breathed the answer they both wanted. "Yes."

He tugged her into gently into his arms. From the comforting reassurance of his embrace, she listened to his plans.

"We'll leave Friday, after you're finished work. We can catch the ferry over and be at the cabin by seven. Have dinner and a walk on the beach before the evening settles. Pack lightly and only tell Susan and Sandra. This weekend is for us. We'll return on Sunday evening. How does that sound?"

She nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

It wasn't until she prepared for bed that night that she realized something else. Having agreed to take the relationship one step further, she needed to go and see a doctor. Something she hadn't fully considered before. Hell, she'd come close to lying down in the grass with him last night without giving it any thought.

The coming weekend haunted her every thought, remembered passion making her shiver with anticipation. Confusion and want mingled constantly. She'd already experienced more in his arms than she'd thought possible—how could the weekend improve on that? But hunger gripped her and wouldn't let go. Just feeling this way was a new experience. She began to wonder if she'd even make it to Friday night, at this rate.

By Wednesday morning, she was so excited she could hardly contain herself. She had her nerves more or less under control. More truthfully, she'd stuffed them away in a dark corner of her mind for the time being.

Added to the excitement was Mark's return. She'd missed him. He breezed into the store Wednesday morning, arms wide open. She ran into them, laughing with joy. He was a special friend—one who knew her too well, it seemed.

"So how's life with Brian?"

"Fine." She grinned up at him. She knew he wouldn't leave it at that and waited in anticipation.

"So how's life in Brian's bed?" His wicked glint went straight to her heart.

"How would I know?" she countered, delighted with the teasing byplay.

"That's it! If you don't know by now, it's time to haul you into my bed." He pulled her close and hugged her again.

"If I ever give up on him, I'll come to you." She patted his chest affectionately. "Come and say hi to Susan."

Susan laughed. "We missed you, Mark. It just wasn't the same around here without you." Susan gave him a big hug, planting a kiss on his cheek.

Mark chuckled loudly. Standing there, with an arm around each of them he added, "I'll have to go away again, if I get to come back to all this attention."

"How is your brother doing?" Karina asked, suddenly reminded of the reason for Mark's absence.

"He's going to be fine. His recovery is a little slow, but he's at home now. Surrounded by his loving family." Mark grinned lopsidedly. "Now enough about me. Anything new? What about Ian?"

Karina's happiness deflated. Ouch, Mark's question certainly took the humor out of the day.

She answered his question somberly. "We think he's been watching the house and there've been several prank phone calls. Of course you already know about the break-in at my place. But we don't have any proof that he's behind these events."