Second Chances (51 page)

The ride to town, though only ten minutes, seemed much longer this evening.  It gave Isabella a
much needed opportunity to think.  She must plan what she was going to say very carefully.  After spending years with Jack she had become practiced in the subtle art of questioning men.  She had studied facial expressions, learned how to detect hidden meaning, and could spot a lie at a hundred yards, although she would be the first to admit that didn’t necessarily imply that she would be able to ferret out the truth.  Discovering the truth took a set of skills that she had yet to master.  Her current defense mechanisms would have to suffice.

At last Isabella pulled up to her favorite coffee house.  Gabriel was already sitting out front watching for her.  She didn’t acknowledge his presence immediately; instead she concentrated intently on trying to parallel park.  Part of the beauty of living in the country would be that she never had to parallel park.  Now, having driven into the city, she had to do so with an audience. 
Please don’t let me hit the car.  Please don’t let me hit the car
.  Isabella prayed silently.  Somehow she managed to fit in the spot in such a way that she wondered whether or not she would even be able to pull out later.  How masterful.  She had entirely too much time to think on the drive, and it showed.  She was on edge.

Immediately, Gabriel recognized Isabella’s angst and put an arm around her for comfort.  She gazed up at him with wide wondering eyes and relaxed slightly as he held the door for her and let her lead the way.  The woman behind the counter smiled as she said, “Chocolate cappuccino?”  Isabella nodded and blushed slightly.  Gabriel squeezed her hand and ordered a vanilla, stacked them on top of each other and held the door for her on the way back to her car. 

She could sense Gabriel’s apprehension.  She hadn’t been as open and warm as she normally would, distancing herself in case she might soon be hurt.  Isabella could feel him studying her, knew that he had no idea what she currently pondered.  She silently applauded her results. 
Yes
, she thought,
I want him a little off balance.  I want to catch him off guard
.  This was a no fail technique she had mastered during her marriage.

They pulled up to the River Walk, which had an instant soothing effect on both of them.  Gabriel deeply inhaled the fresh air while appreciating the beauty around him.  He waited for her to walk around the car, and meet up with him on the sidewalk.  Normally, Isabella would have looped her arm through his as they walked down the sloping steps from the monument toward the lake.  Tonight, however, differed greatly from the norm.  Tonight, Isabella guarded herself and Gabriel sensed that.

As Isabella had hoped, the place was virtually deserted.  Most nights, people would come and go, but very few lingered here, which Isabella failed to understand.  Others only passed by to walk a dog, or quickly feed the ducks.  Gabriel and Isabella picked a bench on the last terrace nearest the water, just before sunset.  Already, the moon illuminated one small segment of sky.  Sailboats were meandering by, and the ducks were noisily quacking for scraps of bread.  Still, it remained a peaceful spot. 

“I love it here,” Gabriel commented appreciatively, grabbing her free hand.  “I am so glad you brought me here.”

Isabella hoped, silently, that he would still think that way after she had her say.  She turned to face him.  He mirrored her, waiting patiently for her to begin the conversation.  He brought the coffee to his lips as she asked, “So Gabriel, what are your intentions with me?”

He looked startled, his eyes bulged slightly, he spluttered, and at last swallowed his steaming mouthful, eyes blinking.  It took a moment before he was able to speak.  “Well, I don’t have an actual plan.”  He paused, knowing that she required a better answer than the one he had so hastily given.  And yet what he said was more truthful than he could have imagined.  “I want to keep seeing you, if that’s what you mean.  I don’t know what’s going to happen.  I just know that I like you very much, much more than I ever would have expected, much more than I ever intended.” 

He spoke honestly now, baring his soul in some ways, since Isabella would never be that forth coming.  “I didn’t expect to fall for anyone in this town.  I thought I was just passing through.  I only know that I want to continue getting to know you and take it from there.”  He paused as he looked searchingly into her eyes.  “Can you live with that?”

Isabella’s entire body heaved a sigh of relief.  She smiled in answer and leaned in to him.  He put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer.  They were silent for several minutes. 

“You know,” Gabriel began, “my friends are dying to meet you.  They have a hard time picturing this woman that I can’t do justice in describing.  For a while they thought I was making you up.  I’m not really ready to share you yet, but at some point could we go out to dinner with my friends so that they can get to know you?” 

Isabella nodded her head.  His head rested on top of hers, so she knew that no words were necessary for her response.  Together, they watched in silence as the sun set and the stars appeared.  The street lights flickered, then burst to life.  Neither one wore a watch.  Neither one cared an iota to know about the time, but still they felt the pull to leave the River Walk.  Reluctantly, they strolled back to Isabella’s car.

Before they climbed in, Gabriel held Isabella to him.  “I’m not ready to give you up yet,” she murmured into his chest.  She sighed.  As much as he had so willingly revealed, this was the most she felt comfortable expressing.  She felt the need to share more of herself and she knew just where to begin.  He pulled back to look at her face, hear what she might say next.  Swallowing nervously, knowing that this one question would change everything between them she asked, “Do you want to see where I live?” 

A smile lit up Gabriel’s face.  This was more than a simple question.  He knew that she had just given him more of that reserved trust and expressed a bit of hope in their future.  He felt like a silly teenager again, unable to stop smiling. “I thought you’d never ask.”

With a plan in mind, they now eagerly jumped into the car.  They spoke in a relaxed fashion as she drove.  It suddenly occurred to Isabella that she might have been too hasty.  She had numerous responsibilities.  “I love Rebecca and Kyle,” she began slowly.  “I can’t just dump them because I have a man in my life.  I refuse to be that kind of mom.  Can you accept that?”  She anxiously waited for his response.

Gabriel inhaled deeply before sighing happily.  “It will just give me more people to grow to love,” he replied, reaching over and giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.

They pulled up the long gravel driveway to her barn.  For the first time, Isabella viewed her home critically, trying to see it as Gabriel saw it.  The cement sidewalk was nestled between lines of hostas in full bloom, bearing stalks of purple flowers as tall as Kyle.  On either side of the steps were her terra cotta pots filled with pink impatiens, purple pansies, delicate champagne tea roses, and vinca vines trailing down all sides.  Her Adirondack chairs graced either side of the porch, while a small square glass topped table sat between the duplex doors, holding miniature yellow daisies.  The four square stone pots of citronella candles on each corner of the porch remained unlit.  To her it looked homey.  Would he see the same?

“This is where you live?”  He looked at her with excitement.  “It looks just like what I would have imagined.  Did you do all this?” He gestured around at the flowers gracing the front of the place.

Isabella nodded and blushed.  He followed her to the door, opened it and held it for her.  When they enter her living room, they found Jane settled into the rocking chair, watching some movie.  Rebecca lay asleep on the couch.  She looked like an angel with her mass of shoulder length brown hair radiating out from around her little head.  Her long dark eye lashes were visibly apparent, despite her tan, and her tiny rosebud lips were slightly parted.

The minute Gabriel saw her lying there, he crossed the room to squat by her side and study her.  “Oh,” Gabriel cried, “she is even more beautiful than I imagined.  She looks so much like her mother.”  He smiled and nodded at Jane, who sat temporarily paralyzed by his presence. 

Gabriel slowly walked over to the doorway where Isabella lingered, watching him and studying his every move.  She tried to see if his reaction was genuine, or if he simply performed as he believed she expected.  His facial expressions seemed real.   She smiled slowly to herself.

He took Isabella’s hand in his and asked, “So, may I meet Kyle?”  As they reached his room on the second landing, they found her son asleep with his back toward them.   Gabriel relinquished her hand to walk to the other side of Kyle’s bed.  He knelt down next to him so that he could see the little boy’s face, study his delicate features.  Even though almost identical to his sister, Kyle looked like an obvious boy.  Gabriel stared at him for more than a minute with a tender smile on his face then slowly reached out to rub his back.

Standing once more, he wandered back to where Isabella leaned against the door casing.  He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulled her close, and said, “I think I love your children already.” 

They paused on the second floor landing.  Gabriel looked up the stairs, eyeing the third floor.  “Your bedroom, I presume?”  Isabella nodded, weakly.  “Do I get the grand tour?”  He whispered these words into her ear, sending shivers up and down her spine. 

Shyly, Isabella led him up the last flight of stairs.  She had always been proud of her room.  In the center of the far wall stood her four poster bed with leaves and vines carved into the wood.  The comforter and curtains were of a matching flower, leaf, and berry pattern on a taupe background.  It gave the room a bright and airy feel.  She had candles strewn around the room, on the night stands, book case, table, desk, dresser, and in the bathroom.  In the entire time that she had lived there, the candles had never all been lit.  On occasion, Isabella would light one or two to relax, but never had she and Jack been intimate with lit candles.

How would Gabriel react to this room?  He studied every aspect of Isabella’s personal space.  He walked into the bathroom, returned to the vast bedroom, jokingly pressed his hands down upon the mattress as though to test the springs.  When he looked up, he realized how uncomfortable Isabella looked, so he simply said, “This is an amazing room, Bella.  It definitely reflects you.”  Then, he gave her a quick hug and a peck on the head, as he led the way down the stairs to the living room, their hands entwined.

“Jane, I’m just going to drop off Gabriel then I’ll be home, okay?”  Isabella waited for Jane’s response.  Jane managed a wide eyed nod.  Isabella knew precisely how she felt.  Jane now wore the same look Isabella must have worn when she realized that Gabriel wanted to get to know her. 

As she pulled the car up in front of the Koffee Kat, where Gabriel left his vehicle, it happened.  He leaned over, innocently, to kiss her.  Isabella had been anticipating this.  She had known for quite a while that it would only be a matter of time before he would make his move.  She had been trying to figure out how she would respond.  Still, she felt awkward, unprepared, and scared.  She hadn’t kissed anyone on the lips for a long time, besides her children.  She had stopped kissing Jack long ago.  All of a sudden she felt like an inexperienced teen all over again.  She feared disappointing him, upsetting him by being unable to be intimate, or worse, finding out that she didn’t live up to his expectations of her. 

As usual, Gabriel seemed to read her mind.  Mid lean he changed course and aimed for her cheek, brushing his lips along the side of her face.  He paused at her ear, where he whispered almost inaudibly, “Don’t worry, Bella.  I won’t rush you.  We have all the time in the world.”  He squeezed her hand as he stepped from the car.  Before shutting the door, he leaned in and said, “I’ll call and tuck you in.”  Then he smiled, shut the door, and walked confidently to his car.