Shocked, Maggie stared at Julianna. Love? That was ridiculous. He wanted her physically, he'd made that clear from the beginning. He'd even told her that he cared about her. But he didn't love her. Maggie was certain of that.
“Nick and I are...friends,” she said carefully. It wasn't a complete lie. She'd like to think that they were friends, even if they were now lovers, as well.
Julianna smiled knowingly. “Okay, Maggie. I'm not trying to pry. But if you ever need an understanding ear, call me. Things were shaky for me and Lucas in the beginning, and nobody knows better than me how difficult these boys can be.”
Maggie watched the “boys,” as Julianna called them, all four of them, jump on a fumbled football and roll in the grass while the golden retriever barked and
danced in circles around them. Nick held the ball up with a victorious shout, then Drew grabbed it from him, inciting a chase.
She smiled at their antics, then glanced back at Julianna, who was watching her carefully from under the brim of her hat. It felt good to sit here, under a blue sky, on the cool green grass and exchange “female” talk. She might not be able to tell Julianna the truth about her feelings for Nick, but it still felt good to talk to her about girl things.
Maggie poured two glasses of lemonade and handed one to Julianna. “You and Lucas are perfect for each other. I can't imagine you two ever being shaky.”
A bright orange butterfly floated by on the warm breeze. Julianna sipped her lemonade and laughed softly. “Oh, we were shaky, all right. You want to know how Lucas proposed to me? He blackmailed me, that's how.”
“Blackmailed you?”
Lips curved in a smile, Julianna. nodded. “He thought he'd bullied me into marrying him, and I let him think that. The truth was I'd been desperately in love with him since I was fourteen. But that's another story for another time. Here come the children now.”
Stunned by Julianna's confession, Maggie hadn't time to respond before the siege overtook them. Two small boys, two grown, muscled men and a yapping dog surrounded them.
“We're hungry,” Drew announced. “Joshua's mom said he could eat with us if it's all right with you.”
They dug into the food with the same enthusiasm they'd shown for football, even going so far as to toss chicken wings and the rolls that Julianna had brought. The frenzy made Maggie's head spin, and the wisecracks
and insults exchanged between Nick and Lucas made her laugh.
She couldn't remember when she'd had such a good time. Or Drew. His cheeks bulged with food, and his eyes were bright with excitement. When the last cookie was gone, he ran off to play tanks and soldiers with Joshua and his dad. The golden retriever, Noah, ran at their heels.
Like sated warriors after a victory feast, Nick and Lucas stretched out their long legs, tucked their hands behind their heads and closed their eyes. Julianna and Maggie smiled at each other and shook their heads.
“So, Maggieâ” Julianna brushed at the crumbs that seemed to forever find their way to her oversize stomach “âtell me about Roger.”
“Roger?” Maggie glanced at Nick. He'd slitted one eye open. “Ah, what about him?”
“You know. Last night.” She whispered, as if she didn't want the men to hear her, but there was a sparkle in her eyes. “You and Roger. In the bedroom.”
Maggie felt the heat rush to her cheeks. Nick had both eyes open now, and he was scowling. Even Lucas was paying close attention, his gaze sleepy, but interested.
“There's not much to tell,” Maggie hedged.
“That's not the way I saw it.” Julianna reached for her lemonade. “You had that boy on his back so fast he never knew what hit him.”
Maggie watched Nick rise up to his elbows and lock his dark, angry gaze on her. “What the hell is she talking about?”
“You mean you didn't tell him?” Julianna asked innocently, but the devil danced in her eyes.
“Tell me what?”
“There's really nothing to tell,” Maggie began awkwardly. “I justâ”
“She flipped him,” Julianna finished, and delight brightened her face. “Knocked that boy right off his feet and threw him down flat on his back. There's been a Maggie Smith Fan Club started in her honor and I'm the president. We expect a lecture and detailed account of the momentous occasion at our first meeting.”
Lucas chuckled and Nick glared at him. “You knew about this?”
“He'd still be lying in my guest bedroom if I hadn't helped him up,” Lucas said cheerfully and winked at Maggie. “Sweet little Margaret Smith packs quite a wallop.”
Nick stared at her, his lips pressed tightly together. He still had the nasty image of Roger with his hand on Maggie, his mouth close to hers when he'd been blocking her way at the gazebo. Nick had exercised tremendous restraint when he hadn't thrown the jerk over the railing and into the creek.
And now he found out that Roger had been bothering her again when she'd gone back into the house, and she'd handled it herself. Flipped the guy, for God's sake.
He knew it was unreasonable, but still, he couldn't stop the hot rush of anger heating his blood.
He stood, slapped his hat against his leg, then jammed it on his head. “I'm going to go check on the boys.”
As he walked away, he heard Lucas chuckle again and decided he'd punch out his lights later.
He'd cooled down a little by the time he reached Drew and Joshua playing with the military action figures in the sand by the swings. Joshua's father and
mother sat on a blanket nearby with a dark-haired toddler, a dimpled urchin in pink-flowered overalls and a matching baseball cap. They smiled and waved Nick over.
“Adam Wheeler.” Joshua's father held out his hand.
“Nick Santos.”
They shook hands, and Adam introduced his wife, Susan, a pretty brunette with apple cheeks and soft blue eyes. “Thanks for letting Joshua play with your son,” Susan said. “We're new in Wolf River, and Josh doesn't know too many kids yet. We were hoping that you and your wife might allow Drew to come play one day after school.”
They thought Drew was his son. And Maggie was his wife. Nick smiled at the thought, started to correct them, then decided to let it go. As strange as it seemed, he sort of liked the idea.
“I'll have to ask Maggie,” he said, glancing over his shoulder at her. She was watching him, her expression concerned, but curious, as well. He reminded himself he was annoyed with her.
“We can't get over how much Drew looks like you,” Susan said. “It's amazing.”
Nick looked back at the woman and blinked. What had she said? That Drew looked like him? He held back a chuckle. He supposed he understood how people might see that. After all, they both had dark, almost black hair and eyes. And there was a similarity in the structure of their jaws. It was logical for people to assume that Drew was his.
Despite himself, he began to wonder again who Drew's father was, what he looked like. He wondered if maybe there was a resemblance between himself and the other guy. If maybe that was the reason that Maggie
had such a strong, frightened reaction to him when she'd first seen him at the market. It would certainly make sense. Or worse, he thought with a scowl, if maybe she was attracted to him because he looked like the other guy. He didn't like that idea one little bit.
But he knew it was none of his business and that Maggie would resent any questions. He had no right to ask, no right at all to delve into her past. A past that she protected fiercely.
Still, he couldn't stop wondering.
Lucas and Julianna had gone for a walk by the time Nick joined Maggie back at the blanket.
“Still mad?” She sat with her arms wrapped around her bent legs and her chin on her knees. Her expression was innocent, pristine. Hardly the expression of a mantossing, karate-flipping wild woman.
He decided to pout for a while. Maybe he'd get a kiss out of it. He stretched out beside her, angled his hat down to partially cover his face. “You could have at least told me about it.”
“I could have.”
“Well?”
“Well, what?”
He tipped his hat back up and frowned. “So tell me about it.”
“There's nothing to tell. He cornered me in the bedroom when I went in to get my coat. I was in a bad mood, he put his hand on me, and I flipped him. End of story.”
“So you didn't need my help out at the gazebo, then, did you? There I was, trying to save you from Roger, thinking that maybe he'd frightened you, and all along, you could have wiped the floor with the jerk. I'll bet you had a good laugh over that.”
“No, Nick, I didn't have a good laugh over it at all.” She turned her head, rested her cheek on her knee as she looked down at him. “I thought it was wonderful. I thought you were wonderful.”
“Yeah?” Though it was small, he felt a slice of his pride return. “You thought I was wonderful?”
She nodded. “And sweet.”
Sweet he wasn't sure about, but the tender, soft expression in those gorgeous green eyes as she gazed at him made his heart stop and his throat thicken with a feeling he couldn't quite identify. He stared back at her, felt his need for her rip through him like a knife.
“I'm going to kiss you, Maggie,” he stated firmly. “Not now, because I won't be able to stop if I do. But later, when it's just you and me, I'm going to kiss you until you can't even remember your own name.”
She sighed, then smiled softly. “Okay.”
Ten
“I
need you, Maggie. I'm lost without you. Please, I'll do anything. Just tell me what you want and I'll do it.”
Maggie rolled her eyes and shifted the phone from one ear to the other while she tugged on her leather hiking boot. Thomas Crane, her boss at the paper, had been calling twice a day for the past three days.
“Thomas, I have ten more days on my leave. We've been over this. I can't leave until the doctor clears my father to drive again. That should be sometime next week.”
“Maggie, I'm begging you,” Thomas moaned into the phone. “David Brooks is out sick, Dan Howard is psychotic, and Georgia's threatening to quit.”
“So what's the problem?” She heard the sound of phones ringing, then Georgia shrieking at Dan, then
Dan yelling back an obscenity that only made Georgia shriek louder. “Sounds like normal to me.”
“Maggie, please, please, just listen to me...”
Only half listening to the same arguments he'd given her the past three days, she tugged on her other shoe while glancing at the sunflower clock over the stove in the kitchen. Nick was coming over at four, and it was already ten-to now. He hadn't said where they were going, just to wear jeans. Her insides were already churning with that same schoolgirl excitement she felt every time she saw him, which had been quite often since the day of the picnic. Too often, she knew, but had been powerless to say no to him.
Nick Santos was a man who knew how to get what he wanted. Which had turned out to be exactly what she'd wanted, as well, she thought with a slow smile.
But they hadn't just spent their time together in bed. They'd gone to the movies, to dinner, even bowling one night. Drew was included on early weekday outings, and last weekend there'd been a fishing trip, just the boys.
She'd known if she let Nick get this close, it was going to be difficult for both her and Drew to leave, but even she hadn't realized just how difficult. Drew would be devastated, she would be heartbroken. But somehow, as it had before, life would go on. At least now she'd have these wonderful memories.
“Maggie! Are you there? Are you listening to me? Answer me, dammit!”
Sighing, she went to tie her boot. “Yes, Thomas, I'm here, I'm listening. You need me. You want me to come home now. You'll give me anything I want.”
Except he couldn't give her the one thing, the only thing she truly wanted. Nick.
She glanced up, saw him leaning against the kitchen doorway watching her. He wore jeans and a black leather jacket, white T-shirt and black boots. He absolutely took her breath away.
She stood too quickly, started to stumble backward, but he moved quickly and caught her, steadied her against his broad chest. His mouth lowered to hers, and he kissed her tenderly, a kiss filled with promise and anticipation.
“I've got to go, Thomas,” she said breathlessly into the phone. “The house is on fire, and I've got to call the fire department.”
“Don't hang up! Maggie, sweetheart, darling, I'm begging you, don't doâ”
His lips still on hers, Nick took the phone from her and hung up. He ran his fingers through her hair and tugged her head backward so he could kiss her deeper still. She leaned into him, tasted the need humming between them. She was trembling when he pulled away.
“You want to tell me who called you âsweetheart, darling' and wants you to come home and he'll give you anything you want?” he said evenly. “I need a name before I kill him.”
“Thomas Crane, my boss. And you won't have to kill him. I'll do it myself.” Her fingers were still shaking as she grabbed her jean jacket from the kitchen chair. “I didn't hear you knock.”
“Your dad was standing at the curb with a sign that says Will Work for Cigar and Whisky. He told me to come on in.”
She shook her head at his nonsense as she pulled her jacket on. “Just let me say goodbye to Drew and my mom.”
He took hold of her arm when she started to move past him. “So are you?”
“Am I what?”
“Are you leaving?”
The intensity in his dark eyes and his voice made her heart pound. They hadn't discussed her leaving since that day in the park. There'd been no talk of the future, no whispered promises, no mention of anything beyond the relationship they shared now. Their time together had been fun and light, passionate, but there'd been an invisible line between them that neither one of them had crossed, a line that was as delicate as it was precarious.
They were standing on the edge of that line right now, and though she'd give anything to plunge headfirst right over it, she couldn't. She'd shatter if she did. Not just her heart, but her entire being, her very soul. Because she was leaving, and nothing could stop that.
“Trying to get rid of me, Santos?” She forced her voice to be light, her smile to be easy.
His hand tightened on her arm. “Are you leaving?”
Her heart was like a drum now, heavy and hard against her ribs. His gaze ripped into her, and she saw something there, something that both frightened and thrilled her. “Not until my dad's driving,” she said carefully, willing herself to keep the emotion out of her voice. “A few more days, at least.”
“Nick!”
They both turned at the sound of Drew's excited greeting. He threw himself at Nick's legs and hugged. Her throat tight, she had to blink back the tears while she watched Nick kneel down, his fierce expression replaced with a wide grin for Drew.
She'd worried about Drew becoming too attached,
and that worry was now a reality. Two hearts would be broken when they left Wolf River and went back to New York, but it was too late to change that now.
“Hey, pal.” Nick wrapped his arms around Drew. “How's it going?”
“Can you come to my school Friday and talk about your job? My teacher, Miss Perry, wants all the dads and moms to come and tell us kids what they do, and I know you aren't my dad but I asked my teacher if it was okay and she said sure you could come so can you?”
Nick had to rerun Drew's excited words through his brain again to figure it all out, then he rubbed the boy's head as he stood. “Sure, pal. If it's okay with your mom.”
“It's okay with her, isn't it, Mom?” Drew looked hopefully at his mother.
Nick sensed the hesitation in Maggie and felt a swift stab of irritation. They had barely more than a week left before she went back to New York, and already she was drawing back inside herself, the same way she'd been before Lucas and Julianna's party. These past few days she'd been relaxed with him, comfortable. She'd forgotten that she wasn't interested in a relationship, that she didn't want to get involved. She'd laughed, opened up enough to share bits and pieces of her life, made love with him. But now he felt the wall going back up again, and it made him mad as hell.
Damn the woman, anyway. He was still bristling from overhearing her phone conversation with her boss, and here she was, as calm and cool as a blade of grass on a spring day. He felt a sudden overwhelming urge to kiss her senseless right here, right now. Then they'd see how cool and calm she was.
But he couldn't do that in front of Drew. He'd made a promise, and dammit to hell, he'd keep it.
“Well, can he, Mom? Can he?”
Maggie glanced at Nick, her smile wavering as she nodded. “Sure he can, sweetheart. If he has time.”
“I have time,” he said, but he felt that time was the one thing in the world he didn't have at all. It was running out quickly. Too damn quickly.
Â
Maggie had shared passion with Nick, experienced intimately his uninhibited lust for life. He'd made her tremble, made her feel wanton and wild and free. But today was something else, something completely different.
Today he took her on her first motorcycle ride.
A real motorcycle ride, this time.
The wind whipped at her hair and face, raced over her skin. She clung to him, wrapped her arms tightly around his waist, pressed her body against his. Power hummed between her legs, heat and speed pumped furiously through her blood. Exhilarated, she screamed with delight as he roared down the highway, completely in control, master of the powerful machine beneath him.
“Where are we going?” she yelled in Nick's ear as they pulled off the highway and started to climb up into the mountains.
He didn't answer, just shifted gears as the road steepened and curved. As if they were one, she moved her body with his, pressed more tightly against him. Her breasts flattened against his wide, strong back, her thighs closed around his tight, firm butt. She felt as if she'd been turned inside out, with every raw nerve exposed. Adrenaline pumped through her veins, her pulse
roared in her head, pounded behind her temples, her eyes and her ears. She'd never felt so completely and utterly alive.
They climbed higher into the mountains, where the dogwoods and pines grew thicker, until finally he slowed the bike down and pulled off the road onto a narrow dirt trail. Laughing, she held on tight as they bounced over the dips and bumps, following the trail several yards deeper into the forest. He stopped the bike behind an outcrop of boulders, tugged off his helmet, then turned to help her remove hers.
Shaking her hair, she took his hand as he helped her off the bike. Her knees were shaky, her legs weak, and she leaned against him when he slipped an arm around her shoulders.
“Where are we?” she asked, breathless as much from the ride as she was his closeness.
“Come on.” He grabbed a rolled blanket from the back of the motorcycle, then took her hand and pulled her along behind him as he climbed up the wall of boulders.
When they reached the top, Maggie felt her breath catch.
As far as the eye could see stretched a green valley. A wide, winding creek separated the grassy land, and the setting sun sparkled silver in the swift moving water. Cattle dotted the landscape, their tails swishing and heads lowered while they munched lazily on the lush growth.
“Nick.” She touched a hand to her throat. “It's so beautiful.”
He spread the blanket out, then moved behind her, wrapping his arms around her while they stared out across the valley. “I thought you might like it.” -
“Who wouldn't?” She leaned back against the solid strength of his chest. If it were possible to make time stand still, this would be the moment. On top of a mountain, in Nick's arms, overlooking a lush valley. “How did you find this place?”
“By accident. I was thirteen and mad at the world. I'd been suspended from school for smoking behind the gym. I knew if I went home I was in for it, so I headed for the hills, so to speak. I rode my bicycle up here and found this spot. I came up here a lot after that.”
“By yourself?”
“You mean, did I bring girls up here?” His lips brushed her ear, sent her pulse skittering through her veins.
“I was referring to Lucas and Ian,” she said indignantly, though that was exactly what she'd meant. But she certainly didn't want him to know that.
“Sure you were.” Chuckling, he nuzzled her neck. “But the answer is no on all counts. I never brought anyone here before. Lucas and Ian don't even know about it. I needed a place that was mine, just mine, where nothing and no one could get to me.”
His place
, she thought.
Just his
. And yet, he'd brought her here. Words failed her, and she turned to look at him, saw the flicker of memories in his eyes, of a childhood he'd rather forget. Of course he'd needed a place to be alone, a place where an alcoholic, abusive stepfather couldn't find him. Her heart ached for what he'd had to go through, but she felt anger, too. Anger at the stepfather, certainly, but even more at the mother who'd abandoned him.
There were tears in her eyes when she turned in his arms and slipped her arms around his waist. She held
him, not as a lover, but as a friend. A simple, caring hug from one human being to another.
“Hey.” He lifted her chin, touched the edge of her eyes with his fingertip and looked at the drop he'd pulled away. “What's this for?”
“Iâ”
I love you
. She caught herself before the words came out. She couldn't tell him, she couldn't.
“I'm...so sorry,” she said quietly. “Your mother...she left you with that horrible man. You were just a boy, you didn't deserve that.”
He'd seen a woman's tears before, Nick realized. Angry tears, manipulative tears, tears of frustration. But never tears for
him
, tears for his lost childhood, for what had been robbed from him. His chest swelled; his throat tightened. Never had a woman so absolutely and completely humbled him.
He wiped at her tears with his thumbs. “We can't change the past, Maggie, and we can't know the future. We only have right now.”