Jeff got on with his software business as best he could, and took a lot of cold showers. He managed the club to such a degree that in the end David took him to one side.
“I don’t know who’s got you in a snit, mate, but at this rate we’ll have no punters prepared to play if you’re on duty. You snapped at Mika and all he asked was advice on how to make sure the wax worked on his sub. You snarled, yeah, snarled like a rabid dog.” Jeff opened his mouth to protest, but David stopped him with a wave of his hand. “It’s got to stop now. Go get laid or punch the wall or whatever, but get over it. And don’t look at me like I’ve overstepped the mark, or I’m dog shit. You look like crap, you’ve circles under your eyes and your sister is worried. Enough already, man. I’m your partner, you gave me authority, and I’m using it now. Go and get laid, give in and step back and let me be nice to the clients. One prospective sub said if all Doms were as sadistic as she reckoned you were, she’d become a switch. How on earth is Kath putting up with you?”
That was it, she wasn’t.
“Yeah, sorry, but well… Can you and Jess come over tomorrow night for a while? Who are on as dungeon masters?”
“Aidan and Dorie. We’ll come. Eightish?”
“Please.” Jeff and Kath had talked about telling Jess and David their news, but he’d been putting it off, scared that by talking about it, he’d jinx things. Jeff knew he was being irrational, but he couldn’t help himself. Maybe this was a good start? “Perfect. Right, I’ll go and annoy my team via the net and see you later.”
He left the main office and walked briskly across the hall to the door that led to his private domain. One day both he and Kath and David and Jess would have their own homes in the grounds. Near enough to trouble shoot, far enough away to be private. Or, as his once upon a time anything to do with BDSM is a big no-no twin said, “Far enough to keep our screams to ourselves.” He never ceased to be amazed how fast she’d embraced the lifestyle once she’d met her Master.
For himself, he’d thought he and Kath were perfectly matched. Until now. Somehow they’d erected a great big wall between them, and Jeff had no idea how to break it down. He knew he was probably overreacting, but he couldn’t help it. The thought of Kath losing their child was enough to deflate his cock as if, well, as if someone had pricked it with a pin. But although she seemed to accept he couldn’t come inside her, he couldn’t make her understand he had to abstain as well. It was only fair.
However, it seemed as her pregnancy advanced, her patience retreated. After several vocal and not so vocal moans and groans, Kath snapped at him, and he snapped back.
Every night Jeff made sure she was fast asleep before he went to bed. Every morning he woke up with Kath plastered over him like wallpaper, her hands on his cock, which stood up and enjoyed it. Then every morning, he peeled her off him, slid stealthily out of bed for yet another long cold shower. He was determined if he couldn’t have Kath, he’d be as uncomfortable and deprived as she was. And it
was
bloody uncomfortable. His cock was making sure he knew how annoyed it was.
Eventually their lack of togetherness came to a head. They were side by side in bed, and she’d once more stretched herself over him. Even that contact was too much. His cock was on red alert and straining to be allowed to shift into her. Where Kath’s upper leg covered his, he felt the dampness of her arousal, as she stroked his chest.
“If you won’t let me come, then at least let me suck you. There’s no absolute reason why we both should suffer,” Kath said, and took one of his nipples into her mouth before she lifted her head to continue. “Seeing you like this is adding to my discomfort. One little climax. That’s all I want, you know. Not a great big swing from the chandelier one.” She moved and pressed her damp clit to his thigh.
“You’re supposed to be a sub, my pet, but I can see no sign of it. Just a petulant, spoiled woman whose sole thought is how to scratch her itch. ‘I want you, I need you’,” he mimicked her words. “Emma says it’s okay. Well, bully for Emma, tell her to scratch it for you.”
Kath stared at him as if he had three heads. “And thank you for your love and support,
Sir.”
The scorn in the title made him flinch. She hadn’t finished. “Well you know, of course the great Jeff Sutherland knows better than the doctor. She’s got years of experience, but what does that count? Nothing of course, because Sir knows best. Well good for you. It’s obvious you don’t want me near you, so I’ll remove myself from your presence.” She scrambled off the bed and didn’t look back as she walked out of the room.
Damn him.
Kath sniffed as she grabbed a sheet and a duvet and made up the spare bed. They couldn’t go on like this. Snipping and sniping at each other over every little thing. Jeff had even queried her drinking some flat lemonade the previous day, asking if the contents were safe. How she hadn’t thrown the can at him, Kath had no idea. Instead she’d answered him in a snarky tone. “Oh yes, vodka is no problem at all.” Then she’d handed him the can and stalked out. He’d followed her to her office where she was attacking the accounts as if there was no tomorrow, and apologized, but the underlying currents of disquiet wouldn’t go away.
She punched the pillow and decided it was made of rock. Then punched it again, much as she’d like to punch some sense into Jeff. Kath sighed. He was right. She was behaving like a spoiled kid. A brat and not bratty in the way he liked. For so long she’d deferred to him in their private life. Willingly, as his sub, she’d accepted he knew best. Of course she’d pushed and teased and tried to get a rise out of him. That was her nature. But this was something else. Never before had that dominance spread out of their ‘play’. Jeff loved her independence and control. Neither of them wanted a twenty-four seven lifestyle. This was the first time he’d ever refused to discuss anything with her and just said a flat out no. It scared Kath more than she cared to admit, but she knew she had to take a stand, even if it resulted the way it had. With her in the spare room, still aching for his touch, and still she accepted ruefully, not prepared to go against his edict of ‘your climax is mine’.
It seemed they were at an impasse. Kath had even considered asking Emma to intervene, but knew Jeff well enough to accept it wouldn’t make one jot of difference. Maybe—hopefully—once she’d had her scan, things would improve. Until then, she was keeping herself out of temptation’s reach. She’d sleep, or
not
as the case may be, in the spare room.
It was a case of not.
By six a.m. Kath was up, with no sign of sickness, showered, dressed in leggings and a long line top which suited her thickening waistline and attacking the accounts once more. She’d let them get behind whilst she’d been in the throes of hugging the loo like a long lost friend.
The door opened and Jeff walked in. The strain on his face hit her, and her heart ached for him. Goosebumps peppered her skin as he kissed her forehead and walked to the other side of the room to lean on the window ledge.
“We’re going to have to talk, Kath. Not now though, I came to tell you that Lachy’s phoned. There’s disturbed earth by the folly. David and I are meeting up with him and Donny to check it out. Make sure the doors are all locked and bolted and don’t let anyone in except us. Bolt the entrance to the passageway from inside the castle, and keep a phone by you all the time. Jess will be up soon.” He left the room before she had a chance to question him, or even say take care.
Kath stood up and walked to where he’d rested and ran her hand over the wood as if to get some sense of his presence. A very faint scent of his cologne lingered in the air. She sniffed and sniffed again as tears welled up. Annoyed with herself, Kath rubbed her eyes with her sleeve and went in search of a tissue. She decided to put the coffee pot on in readiness for Jess to make an appearance.
The kitchen was filled with the redolent aroma of Kenyan full strength when Jess wandered in wearing cartoon cat PJs and a pair of sheepskin boots. She yawned and rubbed her eyes.
“So why do we have to get up at silly o’clock and worry?” she asked as she slid onto a chair and leaned her elbows on the table to enable her to prop her chin in her hands. “We could have slept on, the sleep of the… Ah.” She stared at Kath, who handed her a mug full of steaming liquid. “Or maybe not. Do you want to tell me why you’re fully dressed at”—she looked up at the clock—“holy hell, six-thirty a.m.?”
“Not really. Sufficient to say, your brother is so stubborn, and so it seems am I.”
“Right, still in the desert?”
Kath grimaced. “And some. We’re both miserable. I know he’s read the pamphlets, and spoken to Emma, but he won’t even let me give him a blowjob for goodness sake. I’m horny and fed up I can’t get through to him, that even if he’s so bloody obstinate and determined I won’t come, there’s no reason why he shouldn’t. I’m not asking him to throw me over his knee, although that would be nice.” Kath rolled her eyes. “Jess, I want our child, but I feel like I’m losing Jeff.”
“Aw, hon.” Jess stood up and hugged Kath. It was all too much. Kath burst into tears. “And he’d probably say not to cry ’cause it might upset the baby. Well if my crying upsets Bump, I’m bloody sure the way I feel upsets him or her more.”
Jess just rubbed her back in reassuring and loving circles. It made Kath cry even harder.
“Shh, you’re upsetting me as well now.” Jess sniffed. “And you’re watering the coffee.”
Kath gave a snigger, which ended in a hiccup. “We’re nowhere near the coffee.”
“Nah, but we might have been. Come on, love, blow your nose, wipe your eyes and cuss my asshole of a brother. Then let’s talk.”
“Okay, and you don’t need to tell me I’ve been selfish and stupid. I can see that.” Kath sighed. “It’s not as if I really want sex per se. I want, no I need, to be closer to him, and get my satisfaction from seeing him get his. I’ve been winding him up ’cause he’s annoyed me. Not very subbie like and not very nice I know. I realize he thinks he’s helping by being all noble, but he isn’t. Seriously, Jess, if you get pregnant will you expect David to go without until you can both have it?”
Jess went white, and her eyes clouded. “Ah, well, you see, there’s a thing. I’ll never know. It seems that asshole in Australia took away more than my rights to a safe word—he took away my rights to a child. He gave me an STD, and I’m sterile.”
Kath burst into tears again. Jess joined her. Kath had no idea how long they stayed hugging each other and letting their tears mingle.
* * * *
By the time Jeff got back to the castle, the morning was half gone. The newly turned pile of earth had revealed nothing, and the sharp admonishment to Donny to keep his eyes open had elicited a surly grunt. Not the most successful start to a day. And he still had to talk to Kath.
As he opened the door into the apartment, the emptiness greeted him. Somehow the feeling of Kath always embraced him. Not this time. Would it ever again?
Scared more than he’d admit, and bereft more than he’d ever thought possible, Jeff walked into the lounge. To see a cushion with a note pinned on it.
When he read the note he laughed and reached for his phone. It seemed she had decided to build the proverbial bridge.
Honey bun, we’ve gone clothes shopping. What can I pass mine off as?
When Kath answered, he said two words. “The truth.” The silence was telling. He almost felt he should whisper. “She’s your friend, tell her we’re meeting her and David tonight to tell them everything. Well, not the wedding bit, we’ll tell them that tonight. I’ve asked David to bring Jess over.”
“Yee Bloody Haa. Do you mean everything as in”—her voice dropped—“you won’t make love with me?”
“Not that.” His voice hardened and he cursed under his breath. “Please, love, not that, it’s not much longer now.”
“Too right it isn’t.” Her sigh echoes down the phone. “And I’m not going to say yay or nay if she asks if I’m pregnant, I’ll let her guess and get all fizzy when I don’t say.” They both knew how Jess could get with her temper. Luckily her snits were fiery but short-lived. “Well, all I’m going to say is did you know there’s some amazing, sexy ‘rip me off and fuck me’ lingerie for pregnant ladies these days?”
He groaned and her laugh filled him. “Is Jess there?”
“Nope, she’s buying killer heels. I’m gutted, I have to pass. But you wait until the wedding. Right, here she comes, see you later. I love you, Sir.”
“I love you, pet, and buy some sexy flats instead. You know I can’t resist you in red.” He heard her laugh and a breathy, “Oh yes,” before the line went quiet.
Jeff threw the phone onto the desk with a grin. Saying he couldn’t resist her in red was probably a bad choice of words. Knowing Kath, she’d appear in a red suspender belt and stockings and not much else and try to wear his resistance down. He could hardly wait for the next few weeks to be over so he could be inside Kath again. He hadn’t told her he’d rung the doctor for advice, and even though she’d confirmed what Kath had said, he still couldn’t bring himself to fill her. His mind wandered to the new fuck-me red nipple clamps and handcuffs he’d purchased a few days before. Talk about masochistic tendencies. He looked at them and had to adjust his dick at least once every day. In truth, he was looking forward to using them on Kath. Once… He broke off mid-thought. Irrational it may be, but he couldn’t shrug off the feeling that if anything happened, it would be all his fault. Stupid perhaps, he acknowledged, but for the sake of their child, he’d cope with a few more weeks of blue balls. He opened up the computer and logged onto his office website. If he knew the ladies, they wouldn’t be back for a few hours yet, and he had work he could be doing.
The insistent buzz of the landline brought him back to the present with a thud, and he looked around in bewilderment. Where was the darned thing? That was the problem with a cordless phone. He was always forgetting to put it back in the charger, and having to track it down by ringing the number and following the noise. He found it under a pile of newspapers he’d left ready for the recycling bin just as the buzz stopped and his mobile began to play
Bittersweet Symphony
. He checked the caller. Lachy.