“Since he’s not a performer anymore, and yes, I guess I’m kind of hung up on the guy. I don’t know, I just feel possessive, I guess.”
“If he’s not a performer anymore, then what is he?” Ron opened the screen door so she and Penelope could go inside.
“He’s going to be my accountant and financial advisor. Hopefully.” Abigail bit at a loose hangnail on her thumb. “How do you feel about that?”
“Accountant? He seems like a really smart guy. I think that’d be a good idea to bring him on board, but are you sure it’s just for business?”
Abigail leaned down and unlatched the leash from the dog collar. “Just don’t go looking him over again, okay? And, yes, it’s just for business.”
“Got it, boss lady. So it’s safe to say it’s more than just for business, then.”
The smell of musty cigar smoke wafted through the cabin, reminding Abigail of Carl. Ron looked over at Abigail and smiled. “I’ve got the ribs marinating. I made my homemade barbecue sauce, but it’s going to burn if we don’t turn it down. You get to stirring the sauce, and I’ll start making the potato salad.”
As she sauntered by, Ron gave her ass a hard whack. She jumped and scurried over to the kitchen. As she stirred the homemade barbecue sauce, she couldn’t wipe the grin from her face. Yes, it was more than business.
* * * *
The sweet mesquite scents coming from the huge smoker made Abigail’s mouth water. She’d watched Eric, in his Kiss the Cook apron, slap the burgers and hot dogs on the grill. Like a star on
Top Chef
, he’d slathered the barbecue sauce on the meat, then gone over to the table to finish wrapping tin foil around the ears of corn. He really did have a gift for cooking out-of-doors. She tried to help with the corn on the cob, but he wasn’t having it. He slapped her hands away and sent her off to make the iced tea.
The sun drifted through the sky, occasionally getting blindsided by a rogue cloud as Abigail set the pitcher of tea on the table and finished up the last-minute touches to the potato salad. When Eric opened the lid on the grill, Ron gathered around to fill their plates. Abigail sat down on the porch steps with Penelope and patiently waited for the others to get their share. Penelope whimpered. “It’s okay, girl. We’ll get our turn in a minute.”
From the edge of the porch, Sean appeared, balancing two paper plates in one hand, a wine cooler and bottle of water in the other. The sweet smell of the ribs hit her nose before he took his last step toward her.
“Oh my God, that smells divine.”
“Hurry and take one before I drop them both.”
Abigail leaped off the step and grabbed one heavy plate.
“I got one for you and a hamburger for her.”
“Oh, Sean! You’re the best. Come on, girl, let’s eat!” She tipped the plate toward the Fuzzy Navel wine cooler dangling between his fingers. “Is that for me?”
“Yes. I got the mutt some water.”
“Where’s your plate?” Abigail asked as she took the misty bottle from his hand.
“I’m going to go grab one, and I’ll be right back. Save me a spot on the porch swing with you.”
Abigail looked over her shoulder at the empty porch swing. Nothing sounded more perfect. As she got comfy on the swing, she stuffed a spoonful of potato salad into her mouth. The sun was over halfway down the horizon, leaving behind a warm breeze in its wake. Sean came back with a plate loaded with everything the buffet had to offer.
“Good God! Did you miss anything?” Abigail laughed and licked the barbecue sauce off her thumb.
The swing jerked as he sat down. “Eric brought some kind of iced brownie thing. I’m going to need another plate for that, though. How are the ribs?”
“Wonderful, of course. Seriously, where do you put all that food? You’re so fit, but you eat like a million calories a day.”
He leaned back in the swing and popped a deviled egg in his mouth. “I…I just really like food. Growing up, I didn’t get to eat what I wanted. I used to save up my money to buy candy and those little snack cakes. Oatmeal cream pies were my favorite. Still are.”
Abigail swallowed. Her mother had always hid the sweets when she was growing up. There was more than one occasion where her mother had caught her sneaking a cookie from the pantry. Thank God for her younger brother. He could always reach the top shelf and kept the stash in her room full.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asked before taking a bite of hamburger.
“I’m not looking at you like anything. I’m just admiring your mouth.” He did possess the most perfectly kissable lips. “I like your lips.”
“I like yours too. Both sets.”
God, she had to have turned three shades of red. The heat in her cheeks was enough to warm the Sahara. Instead of commenting and further embarrassing herself, she nibbled on the ear of corn.
They shared the wonderful meal, with laughter and Penelope as their constant companions. Abigail finished the last bite of watermelon while Sean enjoyed the mountain of brownies piled on his plate.
“So what should I do on Monday?” She really didn’t want to face the reality that she was being hunted like a doe in the woods, but she had to deal with it sometime. “I need to do something, don’t I?”
“First, we’ll go to the police station so you can file a restraining order. Then we need to make your place safer. Have you thought about moving? Maybe across town…or in with me for a little while?”
Abigail choked on a swig of wine cooler. “What? I can’t just move in with you. Besides, I come with baggage.” She looked down where Penelope was munching on a piece of angel food cake Sean had given her. “You’re going to fatten up my dog.”
“She looks fine. I mean it, you can stay with me. I know my place isn’t… I know it’s not the greatest, but it’s safe.”
She gave the porch floor a nudge with her foot to get the swing going. “Your place is fine. I just couldn’t impose like that, and besides, I’m not going to let him run me out of another place. It’s time I stop letting him take from me. He’s had enough of my life. It’s time I start thinking about me and not him.”
“I agree, but I want you safe. He’s a nutcase, and I don’t want you in harm’s way.”
“Yes, he’s a psychopath…an asshole and a killer. Maybe I could rent the guest suite from Eric.”
The swing suddenly stopped. “No. You two can stay with me.”
The look he shot her made her insides turn to liquid. “You don’t think I can protect you?”
“I…I know you—”
“Abigail, I know what it takes to kill a man. I know the difference between your ex and myself. He did it for revenge. I…I did it to protect myself. But it’s taking a life all the same.”
Abigail felt her heart stop. It actually skipped a beat and sent a throbbing pain through her ribs. “What do you mean?”
He shifted on the swing, causing it to move again. “I mean that I ended up in prison because I was fighting.”
She knew that already but felt a sinking feeling there was more. “I know.”
“The fight went bad, real fast. His name was Josh Weeks. I was supposed to get five hundred dollars for the fight, but the cops had been tipped off about the venue. But by the time they’d come pulling up on the warehouse, it was too late. Josh had spiked his knuckle wraps and caught me across the chest. I swung and took him down. When it got to be a ground fight, he took the shot, cut my eye and chin. He went for the other eye, and I hit him in the face. The punch landed just right at his temple, and I didn’t realize he was going out because the blood from my cut was blinding me. He made contact again across my jaw. I got cut again, but this time, he kept his fist going, and I was afraid he’d land on my throat. I hit him again. The next thing I knew, the cops were pulling me off him.”
“Oh my God.” The defeated look on his face made her want to cry.
He got up, leaving her on the swing. “They took us to the hospital. I went to jail that night, and Josh went into a coma.” He leaned on the railing, looking out onto the lawn where Ron and Eric were stacking logs in the fire pit. “He died three days later. I’d killed him.”
“Sean…”
“His brain had swelled from the hits I’d landed. I…I didn’t mean to kill him, Abigail. I thought he was going to slice my throat. I really needed the money. I shouldn’t have kept hitting him. I…I shouldn’t have.”
Abigail got up and met him at the rail.
“The guy died, and here I am. I get a chance to have a life, to love,” he said as he turned his head to look at her. “To start a family with someone. A real family.”
Dammit, could he make her insides shake anymore? “You didn’t mean to kill him.”
“That doesn’t matter. I needed the money from that fight to finally get out of town and away from that asshole promoter. I kept hitting him.” He knelt to pet Penelope. “I guess now that you know, you probably don’t want us to keep seeing each other.”
Did she want to continue in a relationship, or whatever this was, with someone who’d taken another person’s life? She watched Sean as he scratched her dog behind the ear, just the way Penelope liked it. “I know you had to fight to make your way, Sean. Does it freak me out or scare me that you hit someone so hard it killed him? Yes. Do I think that you’ll hit me? No.” He looked up at her. “But, that doesn’t mean you can put yourself in harm’s way again to protect me from Justin. You were protecting yourself, and the other guy knew it was an illegal fight. Justin wants to hurt me because he’s crazy. You’re not crazy.” Abigail looked out on the lawn where Eric was setting up blankets next to the fire. “You did ask me not to throw this away. Do you remember?”
Finally, he stood up and leaned on the rail again. “I remember,” he said.
“So why would you?”
“I don’t want to. I just figured…now that you know the whole story, you’d want to bail.”
The muscle in his jaw twitched. He wouldn’t even look at her. She was going to make the leap. God, her hands were shaking, and her stomach might ungraciously give her back her dinner, but she was going to take a chance on this. “I don’t want to bail. I want to start over. Hi, I’m Abigail.” She reached out her hand to offer his a shake. “My ex-husband tried to kill me and took the most precious gift from me. Want to have lunch sometime?”
Sean turned to her, his eyes wide and lips parted. He wasn’t smiling. “Abigail…”
“What’s your name?” she asked.
He looked down at her hand and finally cradled it in his larger one. “I’m Sean. I lived on the street for over a year, fought in an illegal fighting circuit, killed a man, and did time in prison. Name the place.”
They both smiled as he tugged her against his chest and wrapped her in the safety of his arms. She burrowed her face against the soft fabric of his tank top. “Is there anything else I need to know?”
He tucked her head under his chin and slid off the stretchy band holding her ponytail. “Yes. I love your hair. I hope, one day, our little girl has your hair.”
Abigail felt her lungs catch. The thought of seeing a little person padding into the kitchen while her daddy was standing at the stove making pancakes made her eyes go blurry. “Sean…” She couldn’t seem to wrap her arms tight enough around his waist.
“Is there anything else you need to tell me?” he asked.
She rested her cheek on the hard muscles of his chest. “I…I never told my family it was Justin who attacked me. I didn’t want my dad to go after him and get himself hurt. My family doesn’t know.”
His arms tightened around her like a vise. “We can tell them together when you’re ready.”
“Okay,” she reluctantly agreed.
“I was going to make us a spot next to the fire. Do you girls want to go roast some marshmallows?”
Abigail looked down to where Penelope had worked her way between their legs. “I think that sounds like a great idea.”
They started to walk off the porch, Sean clutching her hand like a thirsty man hanging on to an oasis. “I want you to know how glad I am we did this. It feels so good to just get away from the city.”
“I know. I’m glad too. It’s been fun.” The three simple words made his eyes light up.
“Damn, I can’t wait to get you in that tent.”
She giggled and started on a dead run for the fire pit. When she looked over her shoulder, Sean was standing with his hands on his hips, watching her.
“You have to catch me first!”
The smile that tilted his lips made her want to slow down so he could catch her.
* * * *
Abigail turned around and adjusted the pillow again. She looked over at the corner of the tent where Penelope was curled up on her own blanket.
“How does this look?” She flipped the cotton spaghetti strap off her shoulder. The dog blinked back at her. “I want this to be perfect.” God, she needed this to be perfect. Sean had been gone for over half an hour. She’d already taken a shower in the cabin and came out to find Sean sitting with the guys by the fire, talking about cars and sports. He hadn’t given her a second look as she walked by on the way to their tent.
“What if he doesn’t want to do this? What if he’s had time to think and has decided I’m not worth the trouble?” She slipped the strap back onto her shoulder. “Crap.” With a huff, she fell back against the pillow.
The crickets’ song wafted through the tent. The lull almost calmed the rippling sensation rolling through her stomach. Sean gave her courage, made her feel like a woman who could accomplish anything. Made her feel beautiful in a world filled with fear and ugliness.
She stared up into the mesh top of the tent. Sean had left the rain cover off, allowing a warm breeze to dip into the tent. The sound of the sheet rubbing the inflated mattress made her remember all those times she’d been camping with her brother and sisters. Now, those memories were for another person, someone who hadn’t been violated, left broken and unlovable.
The
ting
of the tent’s zipper opening made her look toward her feet. Sean’s head popped in the rounded doorway. She shifted under the covers and curled onto her side.
Sean crawled inside the tent. “I brought you something,” he said slyly. “You’re going to like it. I promise.” He zipped the tent closed. “Come on, ask me.”
She didn’t say anything; the old fear of rejection raced through her mind. The what-if’s came tumbling back.